Limiting tv viewing vs. eliminating it altogether?

[Dianne-TX]

I've wrestled with this for a little while now and it's come back again. My husband and I are resistant to get rid of the tv completely. We don't watch it that much as it is and we limit it very, very strictly for the kids. (maybe 30 min.-one hour a day, but not every day) As far as content, they don't know that anything else exists except Noggin for kids (not The N), Sprout, and PBS. We don't watch tv together as a family at all, but we do watch an occassional video/dvd that is appropriate for the kids. My uneasiness comes about because I've read the books and opinions out there that talk about brain development. I'm curious if limiting tv/screen time is an alternate option that is realistic or if eliminating it altogether is really the only way to guarantee the best results? Is ANY screen time stunting my kid's brain development? BTW, my kids are 7 and 5.

 

Thanks for your comments.

[Barb_]

I'm curious if limiting tv/screen time is an alternate option that is realistic or if eliminating it altogether is really the only way to guarantee the best results? Is ANY screen time stunting my kid's brain development?

 

I think you describe a reasonable scenario. 30 minutes or an hour of Noggin here and there isn't going to make a child's brain melt out of his ear any more than an occasional cookie will harm his physical development. Besides, everyone needs down time and a little brain candy...even the little guys. If it's not causing a problem in your family, it's not causing a problem, IMO. I really wouldn't sweat it.

 

Barb

[myfunnybunch]

I grew up without television. Given my druthers I'd haul the tv to the curb. My dh, otoh, loves television so it has stayed, lol. He's way smarter than I am, too.

 

I liken watching telelvision to eating sweets. Unlimited candy, bad. A little candy or a piece of pie or a chocolate chip cookie once in a while, lovely.

 

Getting rid of the television is a perfectly reasonable option, by the way, just as some families choose to completely eliminate sweets. But it sounds like you've already set limits that work for your family: You limit the types of shows, you occasionally watch movies as a family, you limit the amount of time they watch. And presumably you're filling their brains with healthy fare during the times they're not watching. If what you're doing works for you, keep it up. :)

 

Cat

[Dianne-TX]

...when all along I was working it out in the best way for us, I guess. I suppose I see it as "all or nothing", instead of balancing it out. It is working for us and there really aren't any problems regarding it, just my own insecurities. Thanks for the encouragement. I like the comparison to sweets, that makes so much sense. Thanks!

[Joanne]

I'm not against the reasonable use of electronic entertainment and kids.

 

Some kids are prone to addictive like behavior around screens. For those kids, cold turkey "no" is usually needed.

 

We have rules around screen use that don't sound necessary in your home:

 

1) All chores and school work must be complete, and done with an acceptable attitude. At least the attitude we could see.

 

2) You may not choose screen time if a live person is waiting in acceptable weather to "go play".

 

3) Ending screen time cooperatively is tied to the next screen time occassion.

 

4) Other restrictions and rules and policies:

 

a) Endless You Tube videos unless it's Weird Al.

b) Mostly any kids show.

c) High School Musical and its spawns are banished to the upstairs tv only

d) If you fight over it, the power source (mom) will cut it off

 

I've read some of the "brain development" stuff, too. It's compelling, isn't it? But *for me*, the forbidden fruit intrigue and having my kids percieved as even more odd trumps their brain development.

 

Take away my mother of the year badge, please.

[battlemaiden]

We struggle with this decision in our home too. We don't get our money's worth, that is for sure. For us, it is a grown up thang'.

 

We are sports watching people. I couldn't do without the World Cup or the Olympics. Now we have the Soccer Channel- dear Lord, help me have restraint.;)

 

We also watch news every evening. We only watch one show (Lost) regularly, but we have benefited from many historical programs on Discovery or National Geographic.

 

If it were a decision for my dc we could drop it in a heartbeat. They only watch DVDs and we are pretty selective.

 

When we are at our best we can go a couple weeks without turning the TV on- and we have done these sorts of TV fasts when all my children can think to talk about is the latest movie. :glare: It is good to be the master of this contraption and not the subject.

 

My kids have heard me say more than once that until I hear intelligent conversation for an entire day that doesn't reference any television or movie we will not turn the TV on. The older kids are learning to be discerning in their TV viewing and are getting more freedom in their TV use.

 

That was a little more than you were asking.

 

I have seen kids who don't have a TV in the home who look like drug addicts in the presence of a television. Even my kids have done this before- the "whoa, dude. look. at. the. pretty. lights..." My dh is a firm believer in teaching kids use the TV as a *tool* and not avoid it or any other media. Okay, except for TV game units (Xbox, playstations, etc.), he draws the line here. He won't allow them in the home until they show self-direction in all their upper level studies. :001_smile:

 

Every family has to find their fit. Ours isn't a good choice for others, and yours will be just right for you. But please know that you are not alone in your struggle.:grouphug:

 

Jo

[WTMindy]

TV has never been an issue for us. The kids have never watched it much, when they were young, they watched about a video on Mondays (videos, not usually TV). Now that they are older, they never even ask to turn it on. We watch American Idol as a family, and that's pretty much it. But, I wouldn't get rid of it. THe point of my post is to show that it doesn't have to be a big issue. (We have an old TV and no cable) And, I love to watch sports!

[Peela]

I prefer not to go to extremes, and now my kdis are older it is part of their peer culture to have seen certain movies and know what other people are talking about. Their dad has cable in his own room, and we coudl if we wanted, but we just don't have time for much tv. But good movies, and series, on DVD? Yup. At the moment, we are going through 6 dvds of Darling Buds of May. Its an education!

The thing is, classical education is all good and well, but if you know a lot about the ancients but are not familiar and steeped in your own culture, how can you communicate? Of what use is your classical education if you cant relate to the people in your own times? The media, tv, dvds, these are important parts of our present culture.

Having said that, we don't watch a lot, and you could get away with not much for a few more years yet...but once kids are out there mixing with other kids, they better know who is who or they can't have conversations.

So I see it as immersing in our culture rather than mindless escapism, but a bit of mindless escapism never hurt, either.

[Sue G in PA]

unless it is an educational DVD/video for History/Science. That means from 9 - 4...the TV is OFF except for my 2yo who watches a bit in the am while we work on core subjects. Interesting comment about the research on brain development and TV watching. My 2yo probably watches far more TV than she should (I should clarify this by saying it is all either Dora and Diego, Letter Factory or other ed. DVD's we have) and she is extremely bright, speaks like your typical 5-6yo, etc. She has learned Spanish from Dora, letters from Letter Factory, etc. Of course, she is read to frequently, spoken to even more, plays outside, does "school", etc.

 

Anyway, given a choice...my kids typically will choose to play outside than watch tv this time of year. Winter is a different story. What do they watch? Dd11 watches the Food Network, Ds9 is in to Star Wars and will watch his DVD's over and over, ds8 not into tv so much, ds6 could watch tv until his eyes glazed over so we really limit his viewing, ds5 is into Calliou right now, dd2...anything Dora/Diego. I watched quite a bit of TV growing up and I turned out just fine. Only difference these days is the quality of programming so we severely restrict WHAT the dc watch.

[percytruffle]

Our thoughts about TV are similar to WTMindy's and Peela's. TV is not an evil monster, it is a piece of technology. We are master of that technology, not the other way around. Limited TV viewing is part of becoming a well informed person who is in tune with the present culture.

 

Sci fi is important to us as a family. We have, for years, watched sci fi shows together on Friday nights. This time together and this particular genre of shows and films has given us opportunity to discuss many hot topics of the day in light of the worldview of the writers of the show. Also, dh's education has been deeply enriched by the History Channel and PBS. Where would it leave a history loving kid if he never even heard of Ken Burns, let alone missed all his series? Dd, from the time she was young has been fascinated with animals. Animal Planet was always her channel of choice. Now that she is college level she doesn't really watch TV anymore, but it was a springboard of enthusiasm when she was younger. Dh could never do without TV. He records and watches financial news on his computer. Investing is an important hobby of sorts for him. He predicted this housing market crash and run on the banks a couple of years ago. Because he keeps in tune with what's going on, he was able to profit during this time when many investors have sustained losses. lastly, I am a serious introvert and I need my down time. A mindless decorating show, or an episode of House once a week is not going to hurt me any more than picking up a current magazine and flipping through it or reading a little twaddle in my spare time, which I don't do by the way.

 

What if we couldn't watch the Olympics, or the Stanley Cup play offs, or the Presidential Elections, or the PBS viewing of the Jane Austen movies. What if we had no TV the day the Twin Towers fell? Not only would we be out of touch with our present society, we'd be short-changing ourselves needlessly. The "experts" will most likely come out a few years from now and say what they've said about caffeine, red wine, and eggs: "In moderation it's good for you. We see benefits. "

 

Lastly, one of the most intelligent people I know (German scholar, Fulbright Scholar, Mensa eligible, etc), a friend from our old church who is in his 60"s, owns a whole slew of films he recorded from TV. He catalogs them right along with his plethora of books. Media is just another label for him in his library. I won't be jumping on the "no TV" band wagon anytime soon.

[Karen sn]

I m addicted to TV. So I can't have cable without becoming a total couch potato. I do fine with my bunny ears as long as there is no TV in the bedroom. I love Desperate Housewives (yes, yes, I know - trash TV) but when season is over I unplug and roll the TV to some corner or closet where it sits until we put in a movie. I could never have one be the focal point of my living room.

 

I have a friend whose 2yo watches ALL DAY LONG (has her own TV). I see the detrimental (sp?) effects there with her speech and her attention span. She has been in front of the TV for hours and hours a day for most of her life - used as a sitter. When my dear boyfriend commented on her development compared to another neighbor's kid we know and love - I was able to point out the TV vs. real human interaction/conversation. He is now willing to live without cable due to my own addiction.

 

It sounds as though you respect your TV and have boundaries. This is all that is needed. I think it can be a wonderful tool when used carefully.

 

I like to think of it in terms of wine. A good red wine enjoyed now and then is wonderful. Drinking a whole bottle everyday with a next morning hangover - not so good.

[PariSarah]

. . . watch some TV. We usually get a video on the weekend, but we don't always end up watching it. We go to sports bars during ACC basketball season. (Stinkin' Tarheels. We'll get you next year.) The TV is always on at the g'parents.

 

So, no, I don't think their brains will be rotted by occasional screen time.

 

For us, the reasons we don't have it in the house are: I am addicted, and would watch it if it were here; enforcement would have been an issue with ds, and eliminating it entirely removed the source of the conflict.

 

If it's not a conflict with you, if you're content with their screen time, if they have imaginations and love to read and say, from time to time, "No, I don't want to watch TV; I want to _____!" then you're probably fine.

[Danestress]

My children could definitely live with no tv right now. There really isn't much on for boys their age (10) that they want to watch and I will allow. They go days and days without - weeks probably - though we sometimes have videos.

 

DH and I, on the other hand, might perish. It's not that we watch so much tv. We have to watch if the Tarheels are playing BBalll, although sometimes I get so upset I can't watch it. We like the Daily Show and Colbert sometimes. We watch Teaching Co. videos. If there is a major tennis tournament on, all four of us are likely to watch it.

 

Sometimes I flip the news on while I'm cooking dinner.

 

That's about it for the tv - but those few things - tennis and basketball and Jon Steward are dear to me:)

[Jenny in Atl]

I limit TV during the week but not on the weekends. We have always stressed watching movies over TV. If there is a good show, we set aside time to watch that.

[Nestof3]

I don't see television screens, computers, CD players and such as a negative thing. We limit the silly, entertainment side of it but are pretty liberal with anything that I find beneficial either mentally or spiritually.

 

My children are the better for these inventions!

 

I'm watching Bleak House right now while on my recumbent bike, and I have to say I am so thankful for videos! I get to watch a great film and get a great workout at the same time.

[slug hollow]

I feel obligated to reply to this one because I don't own a TV. :) - but it wasn't a parenting choice. When I moved out on my own, around age 20, I just kinda lost interest in watching TV -from there the less I saw the more the little I did see bothered me. I just couldn't stand the advertising and the trite, simplistic, emptiness of most programming. Back then I had no plans to ever have kids.

When my hubby & I began living together he made the same transition quickly. I don't think TV is a bad thing, it's just not for us.

These days I do worry a little about my kids being exposed to some of the things that TV brings into the lives of most kids. The cultural identity most people find in it is somewhat lost on me, but I don't want to limit the kids to just my sphere. They see an average household amount of TV when they visit the grandparents & it doesn't seem to strike them as a foreign world. They know some kids TV characters from the net. noggin.com etc.

DH & I enjoy tracking down things for them to watch on the computer or from netflix.

[Susie in CA]

I prefer not to go to extremes, and now my kdis are older it is part of their peer culture to have seen certain movies and know what other people are talking about. Their dad has cable in his own room, and we coudl if we wanted, but we just don't have time for much tv. But good movies, and series, on DVD? Yup. At the moment, we are going through 6 dvds of Darling Buds of May. Its an education!

The thing is, classical education is all good and well, but if you know a lot about the ancients but are not familiar and steeped in your own culture, how can you communicate? Of what use is your classical education if you cant relate to the people in your own times? The media, tv, dvds, these are important parts of our present culture.

Having said that, we don't watch a lot, and you could get away with not much for a few more years yet...but once kids are out there mixing with other kids, they better know who is who or they can't have conversations.

So I see it as immersing in our culture rather than mindless escapism, but a bit of mindless escapism never hurt, either.

 

 

Peela,

 

I couldn'd have said it better. I, too, value classical education highly. However, I do believe that TV, Computer, Ipods etc. are part of todays' culture and therefor worth exploring.

 

Susie

[dirty ethel rackham]

We restrict screen time in our house, but have not eliminated it altogether. We currently have a rule that no TV on during school hours unless it is to watch a video specifically for school. Usually no more than an hour a day unless we are watching something together. (DH is not exactly on board with this being a family rule becaue he finds "surfing the channels" relaxing. He usually only does this when the kids have gone to bed or on weekends.) No computer games unless school is done and then only in half hour increments and a timer must be set to retain priveledges. We don't own any game system because I know that would be a huge time sucker in my house. We struggle with addictive behaviors, so I set up rules where it was easier for my kids to behave. It hasn't been an issue since my oldest was about 7 when I had to use the coupon system to prevent my son from having accidents while watching TV.

[Amy in NH]

We always had some form of television up until last summer. For about three years we had only rabbit ears, but got enough PBS and regular channels to get by with watching Sesame Street and Nova. Then we moved into the mountains, where rabbit ears don't work (the signals are blocked by all the granite hills), and got the $16/month broadcast cable package. Once again, this option provided us with PBS, but we also found ourselves living around the night-time TV schedule so as not to miss American Idol, or Gray's Anatomy, etc. It seemed like there was something on almost every night of the week. DH would usually fall asleep in front of the TV, and I would watch the 11:00 local/state News & Jay's monologue on The Tonight Show before heading off to bed.

 

Then we moved. Since last summer, our only choice is sattellite, and because I really don't care to let all the rest of the 100+/- channels into my home (and really can't afford $30/month with the increase in our housing expense since we bought the house) we decided to go without. What a difference! We have plenty of videos, and we signed up for a cheap plan with Netflix so that we can order whichever programs we really want to see (including children's videos, and whenever we want to watch them), but we're finding it difficult to find the time to sit and watch even those videos we ordered! We don't have to rush dinner so as to not miss a show. I don't have the temptation and distraction of the television schedule calling me from my study-time in the evenings. I can check the weather forecast online. DH & I go to bed together and have some quiet time that doesn't involve TV!

[Philothea]

I am against network television and habitual tv watching, that said I think the TV is a great tool for many things. However, in this day and age, the output is totally destructive. Maybe in another day and time when programming is more appropriate the story will change, who knows.

 

For the time being, I believe that all TV does is advertise to children and adults. It destroys independent thinking and creativity. As for 7-10 year olds, my observation is that in their play, they tend to repeat lines from television shows and to repeat plots in their play, especially when they are talking to each other and trying to fit in with their peers.

 

I am all for educational DVD's and movies for a treat or a reward. If I want to watch a show, I can spend less $$ per month on Netflix, and watch the whole series without commericals.

 

We don't subscribe to cable at all, I just cannot justify paying for sewage to come into my home. For us, we want to create a home where we can express ourselves and live outside of pop culture and fads. I don't feel that I need to watch what everyone else does to make me part of our culture and times, if that's all there is to being connected to my fellow man, I'd rather be a hermit.

[CalicoKat]

I've wrestled with this for a little while now and it's come back again. My husband and I are resistant to get rid of the tv completely. We don't watch it that much as it is and we limit it very, very strictly for the kids. (maybe 30 min.-one hour a day, but not every day) As far as content, they don't know that anything else exists except Noggin for kids (not The N), Sprout, and PBS. We don't watch tv together as a family at all, but we do watch an occassional video/dvd that is appropriate for the kids. My uneasiness comes about because I've read the books and opinions out there that talk about brain development. I'm curious if limiting tv/screen time is an alternate option that is realistic or if eliminating it altogether is really the only way to guarantee the best results? Is ANY screen time stunting my kid's brain development? BTW, my kids are 7 and 5.

 

Thanks for your comments.

We've been keeping Saturday as their TV, DVD, Playstation day. It's a nice change of pace for the weekend and it was an easier way for me to keep track of how much viewing they did. Any plan is something I'm going to have to manage so it can't be too complicated.

 

Of course this only worked until they realized they could watch their shows online. . . . :( I had to password lock the computer.

 

My kids are young but they figured out the internet all on their own.

[Antonia]

Agreeing with Battlemaiden that tv should be used as a tool. If it is used to inform, rather than hypnotize, it can be a useful and educational tool. We watch tv quite a lot by most standards here. I'd say we watch about two hours per day. But, that is almost ALL what I call edtv - pbs, national geographic, history channel, discovery, animal planet, etc. We do not watch reality shows, sitcoms, or game shows which, imo, are dumb, dumber, and dumbest.

 

My kids pick up extraordinary amounts of info from the shows they watch. I plan ahead for each week what we will watch at the same time I plan their schoolwork, so there is no mindless channel-flipping ending up in simply watching something dumb for the sake of watching something.

 

On the flip side, my brother in TN believes in NO tv. When I called him last month when the tornados were hitting his state to make sure they were ok, he wasn't even *aware* there were tornados. So, I do think there is something to be said for being somewhat connected to the rest of the world through tv, radio or internet news! :001_huh: