I think it's true at least for my DH. Right now, for example, we are low on jobs (freelance/home business). All he can think about is getting jobs, and jobs he doesn't have, and the jobs that maybe might come in. Jobs, jobs, jobs. Consuming. He has side projects he is usually working on during downtime on the evenings and weekends. Technically, he could be using this extra time usually taken by jobs to get ahead on the side projects. But, he is so focused on the jobs situation he can't focus on the side projects. Me, on the other hand, I am facing a scarcity of sleep. So all I think about is sleep. Nothing really matters to me, except for sleep. Sometimes chocolate. Other times, food. But really, it's all about sleep. :)

Forgot to address this: she doesn't have any other fears after reflection -- at least, none that are unusually strong or out of line for her age, though anxiety has been showing up on a few things. Mostly, she escalates quickly when she feels criticized or uncomfortable. For example, piano practice: 95% of the time its fine and we go through it with her, but particularly on new pieces or hard to master techniques, she can get weepy very fast. We do the sit down and talk about our feelings, what's going on, etc., and she says that she doesn't like the uncomfortable feeling of learning something new. It seems only to come up on "uncomfortable" (I think "hard to master"?) topics, since this isn't an issue with easy pieces, or something I see in home school with other topics, all of which are coming to her very easily at this point. She's also been fast to find offense in conversation recently. I don't know how much of this is true anxiety, just the regular frustration of learning something new, or her age. I remember being very weepy in 2nd and 3rd grade. I'll do some more research into this. Thank you for the idea.

Her reason is because she is afraid the shower head is going to come to life and spray wherever it wants to. I'm not sure, but I think she envisions is coming off the wall and moving around inside the shower, not anchored to the wall. (She has never seen a shower head with a removable head and long neck so you can move it around. I have made sure of this, because if she knew that type of shower head existed, I am sure it would not help things.) You know, I'm a bit embarrassed to admit this hasn't been seriously considered by me. I think it was originally one of those "You are 6, time to learn to shower" things that has become cemented in my mind. But, I do think this is one of those things that, since she CAN take showers without anxiety, so long as we keep it up, it is something that I want to do so she doesn't give in to her fears (at least now that *she* would probably see it as giving in, she's mentioned a few times that she doesn't like her fear controlling what she can do). Also, baths are only a partial solution, since our bathtub is a shower combo, and she can still see the shower head when she is in the bath, and the fear is mostly the shower head itself. (At my parents, the bath is separate from the shower, which is why it seems a day or two there greatly affects her tolerance.) Thank you for the reminder. I've been trying hard to keep it together and not make it worse by adding more stress to the whole issue. Good to know that "keeping up the exposure" is important, and that focusing on making it a habit can help. I think I'll do some meditation pre-shower time for the next few days till we're past the hard part again so that I can be a better support for her.

Of your kids. Not an irrational fear of you kids, but the irrational fears belonging to your kids :) My issue: my DD8 is afraid of showers. Specifically, shower heads. Imagine screaming, crying, kicking, when I say it is time to take a shower. She's been scared of shower heads as long as I can remember. Showers have always been an issue. She is NT, no concerns there about underlying/diagnosable issues; this is just an irrational fear that she hasn't gotten over (and to be fair, I'm not over my fear of werewolves, so I am trying to keep that in mind when I'm dealing with her). Now, we get her over this, she copes, and soon she is totally fine taking a shower and may even joke about how silly it is to be scared of showers. She takes a shower without issue or comment. BUT THEN if she goes 1 or 2 days without a shower (going to my parents for an overnight stay, and taking a bath instead) when she comes home we are right back at the crying and screaming again. Then it takes at least 3-4 days of daily showers and holding hands and coaching to get her over it again. Since she was at my parents for a lot of days when the baby was born, this issue has intensified again, to the point that, well, I'm writing here. I'm getting tired of this. And, we keep getting over it and thinking the worst is behind us, but then we regress after just a few days of missed showers. I have slowly slid from "Patient Mom Helping Her Daughter to Face Fears and Overcome Them" to "Get in That Shower Right Now or So Help Me." I can hardly manage sympathy or patience at this point, and am just happy to get through it without losing my temper. Words of advice? How have you handled similar situations?

My DH was overly responsible as he was growing up. By 12, he was the main maker of dinner, cleaning the house, laundry, and taking care of his brothers (3, all younger than him, plus a cousin that lived with them for 1.5 years). His brothers only did minimal work. Even though he is the oldest, the gaps aren't THAT big. Once he was 16, he was the main driver for kid stuff. He is a hyper-productive person, I think he was always like that and so he initially didn't realize that it wasn't normal to be doing all this stuff as a kid; he "needs to be doing SOMETHING, no one else is going to do it, and the house needed to be clean" type of mindset. His parents are doctors, so they could have afforded more help. And when he was younger, they did have people to help clean, etc. So I don't think there is an excuse of survival of the family in his case. It was detrimental in a couple different ways (this is my perspective now): One, he didn't get as much time to do what he wanted as a kid and to explore his own interests. He had a broken leg when he was 15, and he has casually mentioned that making dinner with crutches is a lot harder than it sounds. So, your kid has a broken leg, you have $$, and you still have him run the house and make dinner? It didn't heal correctly and they had to re-break and do surgery to fix it, along with bedrest. Apparently his mom/dad made dinner during that time, but the house was a mess. Two, his brothers reaped the benefits of this disproportionally. For example, one brother was able to take on part time (acting) jobs starting at 14, because DH took him to his jobs, did all his laundry/ironing/packing for the shows, packed him food for while he was at work, made sure his homework was [kind of] done, etc. This brother has been really successful because of the early start -- by the time he graduated high school he had a respectable work experience and contacts in his field. It's great for him. This meant, though, that my DH couldn't take on any other job or get work experience past bagging jobs because his obligations to his brothers was something he had to work around. My DH in the past few years has started to feel resentment for it. He's tired of cleaning houses, doing laundry, and making dinner, because he's done it so long. Sure, he helps me around the house -- and is a great help and has taught me so much in terms of doing this efficiently and better faster -- but he's just "done with it." And he gets irritated with his brothers when they say something about how easy it is to be a kid because you don't have to do any chores or anything, when really he was the one held responsible to do it all and that's why it was so easy for them. And, irritated that they don't see what he did to help them as something special (I guess, they were kids too, and it wasn't their fault. My DH sees this too, but it still rankles). And when his mom talks about how hard it is to raise 4 boys, home school, and work, he can't listen very long... His approach with our kids is that they will know how to do all the chores of running a house, and have definite responsibilities to the family and house. The differences being, that EVERYONE has responsibilities, that are commensurate with their abilities, don't take all of their time, and are paid for things that they do above and beyond their normal chores. He doesn't want a kid, especially our eldest (DD8), to feel like they are in charge of their younger siblings. All this to say, I think it's toxic when the child is instrumental/lynchpinning the household together, and the survival of the family could be secured in another way, and there is no effort on the part of the adults/parents to change the situation so that the child only has the responsibility as long as absolutely necessary, and is not taken for granted. And the child's future and mental wellbeing suffer because they feel obligated to put others before themselves.

My mom was 40, my dad was 42. I have 2 half sisters, who are 16 and 18 years older than me. Some people on seeing the gap say, "Oh you were an oops baby!" And my parents and I have always replied, "No, she/I was a miracle." It helped my parents were married only 3 months before announcing my upcoming arrival, and my mom had notoriously hard pregnancies, both getting pregnant and keeping pregnant. My parents are old-fashioned, even for their generation. I got up earlier than my friends, went to bed earlier, had earlier curfews through high school, etc. Just stricter in general. In truth, I didn't mind so much (except for a few specific events) and I think it was overall better for me. I didn't really notice the difference in parent ages until maybe middle or high school. When I was smaller, all parents were just old :) But, they did get mistaken for grandparents often enough for me to think people were weird. They developed quick answers/clarifications early on. My parents were more involved in my school life, volunteering, etc. While stricter, it seems they were more patient as well. Can't really explain the difference in how when my friends were over my parents talked and did more stuff with us and planned activities, whereas the other parents tended to let us play in a room. Flip side was I wasn't enrolled in activities that were out later or had to travel (sports teams). We were behind on technology compared to my friends. NOW: My parents are really involved with my kids (they are in their 70's now). Like, see them 4-5 times a week and keep them overnight at least once a week. They are starting to have health problems, so we do need to be flexible (home schooling helps this, especially now that I am not working). Mostly Im grateful they are close to my kids, and are still very active. I know this is starting to change and will continue to go away. But, my mom still subs teaching and my dad has a social life, so they aren't just sitting in a dusty house wasting away. In fact, I think having grandkids has really helped them stay active and have something to look forward to. My dad especially seemed to be slowing down pre-grandkids, but having a baby around kicked him back up. Of course, this is mostly dependent on personalities -- my dad loves the early years of kids.

So, when the new grocery store opened in town, I was 4. My dad took me to the store for the first time. The guy greeting people at the door told him "What a beautiful granddaughter!" My dad had to correct him and the guy just about died of embarrassment. But, small town, we saw him every time we went in the store, lol, so it soon didn't matter. He called my dad "Mr. K", and I was "Miss K" whenever we went in. Fast forward to when I'm 16 and able to drive myself. My parents sent me to pick out a movie (small town grocery store was only place to rent, until the Blockbuster came when I was 17). I picked out a PG-13 movie, I don't remember what it was. Same guy is still there, he's a manager type now. He knew us, knew my parents were fairly strict on movies, etc., and didn't know if I was allowed to see this movie. So, before he would check me out, he called my parents to ask if they knew where I was and that I was renting a movie. They told him yes, and that the movie was fine. He rented it to me, but told me it would be helpful if next time I brought a note if I was going to get something from the PG-13 section, he had a responsibility to my parents. !! lol

On the occasions where I have had a double peak for ovulation (what you described with the mucus coming again a week later that you called unusual), it is like resetting the time until my period as if the first mucus had never happened. So if you usually have mucus then 14 days before period, I'd start the 14 day countdown from the day after the second round of mucus. I have double peaks semi-often, 2-3 times a year. It usually fits the above pattern I describe. As for your other symptoms, though, it may make sense to test because *something* is going on, whether it be a cold, flu, pregnancy, or alien abduction. It'd be good just to rule out 1 of the 4 so you can focus on the other possibilities. :)

I'm working on my posture, I have computer back syndrome. A standing desk helps, but if you are standing slumped it doesn't really make much difference as just sitting slumped, lol. My DH went through this a couple of years ago and dramatically improved his posture (and still is working on it). He did have to make it more conscious. He went to a physical therapist for 6 or 8 sessions specifically to address his posture and learn about how to stand correctly, and what stretches to do. This isn't an option for me (different insurance now) but I do stretches and check myself in mirrors as I walk past to try and visually correct it and keep it conscious. This is the book/site that has been the most helpful in learning about posture and how to change it: http://www.naturalposturesolutions.com Most interesting to me was that what "looks" straight is actually NOT straight, but leaning backwards.

Floor steamer, replaced my mop and I have never looked back. I have white/speckled tile for my whole house. I got tired of bulky, heavy, twisting, wringing, slopping, change-dirty-water-all-the-time. I think this is what I have, or they look identical: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0091YYUAM/ref=asc_df_B0091YYUAM4836781/?tag=hyprod-20&creative=394997&creativeASIN=B0091YYUAM&linkCode=df0&hvadid=167153662451&hvpos=1o2&hvnetw=g&hvrand=17120397443926624718&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9030209&hvtargid=pla-275627515118 You need distilled water to run it, I usually mop my kitchen twice, once to get stuff off, once to disinfect/sanitize with longer steaming. I recommend at least 2 towel-things that go on the bottom (I think it comes with two, and I bought 2 more but I had clicked the wrong size :( and just never got around to ordering again).

We haven't celebrated Valentine's past a slightly nicer meal and music during dinner for years (the kids aren't up for much more than that). This is the first time in at least 4 years we are actually planning something. We are looking at it like it's our last chance before the baby comes to go on a date, lol. So my parents are taking the kids overnight, and after my DH's teaching in the morning we are...doing something. IDK what, it's a surprise (I like surprises, this is a good thing). But I'm looking forward to just getting out. Hopefully it doesn't end with me going into labor, lol, though I guess that'd be a surprise too ;)

When learning a new thing, I let my DD work at something on her own white board, then when she's done, I'll do the same problem on the big white board. I don't look at her answer [or at least don't let her see me looking at it], or her work, or ask what she got. Just do the problem again on my own, step by step. If it's quiet afterwards, I know she got it wrong, lol, because otherwise she'd go "Yeah!" So I assign another problem and do the same thing. If the problem persists, I have her "help" me at the board after I model a few times. I'm honest if she asks me to check her work, but in more of a "hmm, let's look at this step again". Sometimes she unravels at that, but she is learning to be more resilient. I don't have a problem correcting her usually, but she is a bit insecure in math just because she sees her brother do it naturally. She doesn't see that she is just about the same level of intake/understanding, and maybe could be the same as him, if she was as interested in it as he was. So, I try to impersonalize this subject as much as possible. My DD is younger, but maybe this can help.

Ikea Mattress. Whys: 1) it was cheap 2) my DH and I couldn't agree on what we liked at other stores, and we were open to 2-3,000$ models 3) the ikea was the first one where neither of us vetoed immediately 4) even if we decided we didn't like it later, we didn't have that "but we spent so much" regret/pause about getting a new one 5) we've had it 3 or 4 years now. We talk about replacing it, but are comfortable enough that it's not a big deal. 6) cheap. If we get a nice windfall, we are thinking of trying the Purple Mattress that is being heavily advertised. But, we are happy enough that a new mattress isn't something we are budgeting for or think about often. It's not love at first sight, or a gushing review, but an acceptable level of comfort and I wake up fine and without any pain from the mattress. Disclaimer: I've never had a super nice mattress, in my life. If you are used to name brand or tech-cutting mattresses, this probably won't work for you. But, in my case, the Ikea was actually an upgrade.

I think we're due around the same time. Thanks for posting what you have ready, I needed it. Right now, the bassinet is still in the attic, the changing table is covered with other kids' stuff, the 3yo is refusing to leave the crib, which would be ok if I still had a pack n play but it died a horrible stinky death about 6 months ago, all the baby clothes are in the attic too (I hope), I don't have the carseat yet, I don't have nursing bras (but Maternity is having a sale right now so yay!), and I don't have any bottles in the house. So! In my humble opinion, you are good to go! :) And now I have a better list of what I should really get around to doing. Maybe tomorrow. Or this weekend. I'm in town next Tuesday, so maybe it can wait until then. And maybe the baby can just hold tight another month, too, LOL .

Family of 5, but they are little still. Throwing my info in because if you count us as a family of 4, we are still above what I'm seeing here for some families of 5. My regular weekly run comes to around $125. At the beginning of the month I have one large shopping trip which is around $200, then maybe another $100 when I go up to the city once a month (Trader Joe's and Whole Foods). So probably around $650-700 a month. I usually budget $650 for 4 weeks (give or take depending on other expenses), and it can be tight. We live in a LCOL area. We do not eat out except maybe one dinner/month (just DH and me, total of around $20-25), buy 95% whole foods only (no cookies, snacks, prepackaged, etc). May buy a 6-pack for DH at beginning of month, otherwise no alcohol. Do buy sparkling water. We do buy organic milk, some organic produce (when available), natural meat (enough for ~3 meat dinners a week plus leftovers). Toiletries and paper are budgeted for separately. No pets or pet food. By category, rough estimates of the week run (not including average of what is bought at beginning of month, I stock up on meat and staples then): Dairy, 4 gal organic milk + eggs = $40 Meat = $20 Shelves (cereal, pasta, bread, flour and other staples like spices) = $25 Veggies = $30 Fruit = $10

I've used the same Skip Hop Duo bag for my first 3. Trying to decide if I will stick with it. It is definitely sturdy though, and looks still basically new. I got a black one because my DH was going to use it as well. I can't find the exact version (I bought 8 years ago) but this is similar: https://www.amazon.com/Skip-Hop-Signature-Messenger-Convertible/dp/B018996ZKC/ref=sr_1_32_s_it?s=baby-products&ie=UTF8&qid=1486091820&sr=1-32&keywords=skip+hop+duo Pockets are a bit on the small side but can hold water bottles/sippy cups that are thinner. Would hold cloth diapers, don't know how many you want though. There were enough separate pockets/zippers I always have room for keys etc.

Thanks for all of the advice! Biggest problem I see with getting a seat for the baby is that I can't reserve the ticket now -- I have no birth date nor name. Even the sex may change, you never know :) I need to reserve tickets now to get the best price, I guess I can call the airline directly for the 3rd ticket and see what we can do. If I can't get a ticket for the baby, would you advise putting baby in a wrap when not nursing/takeoff/landing, would that be a safer alternative than just in arms? I've never been the most successful wrap person (and 1 month is a little young I think?) but am willing to practice if this would be the best option available.

Well, I always wanted a lot of kids. Didn't intend on homeschooling, but they'd go to the best private schools, which wouldn't be a problem financially because I was going to get my degrees, and a lucrative career first, and work when I had kids. And you don't really meet someone and get married before you're at least 30, maybe 32, right? Right?? Met my future DH when I was 17 (well, knew since I was 12, but noticed him at 17; he is a few years older than me). Engaged at 18. Left college after 2 years to get my MRS degree instead, married at 20. Did get a job, not too bad pay given the area. Had first kid at 22. Next at 24, then 27, #4 due while I'm 30. My DH was homeschooled and for him it was always something to consider but not a for-sure thing (he didn't want it to be like his experience, basically). After looking at the public school and other options in the area, it was clear our kids were not made to fit into those environments. So we decided to homeschool and see how it worked out. We split the duties and my flex schedule and his part-time job was enough to make it work sufficiently, and the kids thrived. Worked that same job for 9 years, got laid off a year and 3 days ago. Have been helping my DH with his freelance/business since I've been home, and homeschooling has become my full-time job, along with house stuff. So overall very different -- married 10 years and expecting #4 while I'm 30, slightly different than "start looking at mate material at 30", lol -- but each decision was weighed and I'm happy with where I am. While it would be nice to have my degree, I don't I regret the choice I made and would make the same choice again. Now, my overall plan is to keep going as is, just raising the standard in each area -- home school, house, and business. I especially need to raise the business if I want this to be permanent, so that takes most of my improvement-attention right now. Since we were expecting me to continue working for at least a couple more years while homeschooling, we had done a TON of prep in a big swoop 2 years ago, which takes a lot of the homeschool planning stress off of me for now. Knowing my personality more, and seeing the difference between what I actually wanted/who I am, and what my parents raised me to be, has been very helpful. They still think I threw my life away, and blew all my chances at a good life (they love the grandkids though, so are mostly amicable and don't push this topic too much). This used to sting more, especially when I was younger and newly married because I was a very obedient kid (didn't go through the teenage rebel stage, literally my first rebellion from their expectations was getting married). But now I see that the path they put me on was not good for my personality and I probably would have either burnt out or just been really, really unhappy. I feel like I dodged a bullet, and thankfully dodged to something that fits me much better.

Addressing the dresscode misunderstanding and your request for books to read together: I was talking with a mom-friend a couple of weeks ago. Her son is autistic, very sweet, very literal, and given to explosions/meltdowns when things are too much. She highly recommended the Amelia Bedelia series (she was talking about chapter books for this age, but I think the original shorter versions would work too) because they were funny, and also were helping her son see that not everything is literal or should be taken literally, i.e. "draw the curtains" or "raining cats and dogs". Even if your son isn't autistic, and even if he isn't THAT literal, these may be a fun thing to read together and may help -- at the very least, I don't think it could hurt. I understand having a highly emotional child can be difficult, and your description of trying to hold him sometimes helps makes me think of a discipline book I read last year which was very helpful. Yes, you need to be the one that is steady in those situations, but maybe reading about how his brain may be working in those situations will help put it in perspective and make your job easier. I'll come back and edit my post with the title when I find it.

So, there is a business conference in March that we (DH and I) need/want to go to. This is seriously impactful on our business, and I will be very disappointed/ticked if I don't get to go, and my DH will not be able to get as much out of it without me there [even taking into account that I'll be taking care of a newborn while there]. My parents could watch the other 3 kids (once I break this to them, ha). We would need to take the yet-to-be-born newborn, who will be approximately 1 month at the time. It would be a 1.5 hour flight, we would stay in the hotel of the conference. I will be breastfeeding, and I know from past experience I won't be able to leave the baby that young. I did return to work with all my kids after 4 weeks; this is my first kid where I'm not working outside the home. Has anyone traveled with a 1 month old? What do you suggest/warn? I've traveled with a 6mo, but 6 is a lot bigger than 1. On the crazy-o-meter, how crazy is this? Disclaimer: if there are complications with the baby, if the baby comes too late, if the baby is sick, etc., I won't go, and my DH will. So, yes, that is something we know, that sometimes we can't plan for this type of thing and every baby is different. I'm trying to plan for the hoped scenario of both of us going.

Just to add another perspective: Sears told me they no longer service Kenmore brands and cannot accept repair/service orders for Kenmore, even if still under warranty. They said I had to send to Kenmore directly. They weren't sure where that was. They did end up taking the vacuum for servicing anyway, but only because it had been serviced in December and this "repair" was because the last one they did didn't actually do anything. So it was covered under the warranty on their repair, if that makes sense. So I think they are trying to shake things up, LE may be another example of them changing policies haphazardly.

My DH and I are totally different body types, so while we have a certain standard of food, we are constantly doing a balancing act to have both of us happy (plus kids) with what we are eating. We have a 95% whole food household, with a few staples that I am not up to getting rid of just yet. My husband needs vegetables, all day, all the time. He prefers raw, not cooked. He will eat a little fruit, and likes nuts for afternoons. Avocados are also on his go-to list. At 10pm, if he says he feels like a snack, there is a 50% chance he is going for a salad. He likes meat and needs it at least every other day, but in variety, and can only handle "heavy" meals once or twice a week. He likes pasta, but can only have it once a week otherwise he feels overly carb'd. He hardly eats or wants bread, etc. He could probably go vegetarian/vegan and sigh for meat, but survive. I like veggies, but I eat a serving and am done. I want meat, in all its glorious ways. Fish is okay, but it isn't really an alternative to steak. Going vegan/vegetarian for me would be a death knell. I love breads and carbs (though I think this is more of an upbringing thing/addiction than what is naturally what my body should have; when I outlaw carbs I immediately slim down and have more energy). I like cheese, dairy, and tend to go to high fat options naturally. TLDR; I think there are different needs. I remember reading a book called The Genetic Key diet years ago which put more emphasis on body type/ancestry for what you should be eating. Our house is a melting pot which makes it difficult to figure out what everyone needs. I would try to stick to natural options as much as possible, but from that pool just do what is best for your family. Stay away from foods that give bad reactions, have the fats/proteins that everyone seems to like readily available, and cook meat only in proportion to how much you hate cooking it, or find meat options that aren't as onerous to do. :) eta: I hate CUTTING meat. I have found buying the pre-sliced meat or pre-cubed meat makes my enjoyment of cooking go way up. If I have to handle the meat before it goes into the pan, I avoid making it. I do it sometimes because sometimes the sales are just too good, but then dread the prep and cleanup afterward.

I think it depends on the kids' ages. If we need to be in the room and close vicinity while they are playing (like 3-4 yo) then parents should stay. But my daughter's playdates since she's been 7/8 have been drop offs. I was surprised the first time this happened: I went to the other person's house, we were greeted at the door (first time I'd been there, don't know the family that well, just through TKD) and DD went in but the mom was giving the vibe of "okay, bye!" I just stayed there until she invited me in. We had a good conversation and I was completely comfortable after about 10-15 minutes, so I left soon afterwards, but the mom definitely hadn't been expecting me to come in. They have had playdates at our house since then, she immediately drops and goes, and has never been inside. Since this happened, I've kept playdates for the younger kids at parks, because it seems no one expects to drop and go at a park. Playing outside with neighbor kids is just one of those kids-knock-on-door, kids-go-outside. They ask permission before they go into someone's house. When we get that request we usually tell them no, it's about time for dinner, or clean up, or whatever. I don't mind the kids playing outside where I can see them quickly or call them over, but I don't feel comfortable enough with the families to hand over responsibility.

I feel so famous you quoted me! :) I even showed my DH, and he laughed because I am the poster child for learning the hard way, lol. He learned how to run a household by the time he was 13 -- cleaning, laundry, dinners every night, while "homeschooling" (his parents worked and he essentially did everything else, including help brothers with their homeschool; he does not recommend this method of learning-on-the-job, however, and is adamant our kids will know how to take care of a house but will not be responsible for OUR house, or other kids' messes/laundry/well-being). I was a single child whose parents' philosophy was "your job is to get good grades" and while I learned some household basics, what I did learn was inefficient to say the least. Ok, onto what works in this house: Dishes - everyone clears their spot and stacks dishes next to sink: plates on plates, bowls in bowls. Silverware/serving spoons go into a bin with water to soak. I move the stacks to the dishwasher (hopefully this will change as kids get older, but at this point I still need to do the rinsing myself), silverware is left all day to soak until right before the dishwasher starts. Dishwasher - Does your dishwasher have a timer?! Mine does! I discovered this maybe 4 months ago and I LOVE this. Sometimes we like to stay up late, and this makes snacks!, but I don't like finding dishes in the sink in the morning. So all I do is get the dishwasher ready, and if there is room in the dishwasher for extra stuff, I simply set the timer to start in 4 hours, then we can add if we use something. If we don't, no harm no foul. If we do, yay!, less work the next morning. The danger is not closing it all the way after the new additions, so then nothing ends up getting washed. :( Only happened once though, and we learned our lesson. Laundry - basket method. Each kid has a basket, and a hamper. Clean clothes are in the basket. As they are worn, into the hamper. Kids do their own laundry, and dump their entire hamper at once into the washer, wash and dry. Then when done, all the clothes are just put back into the basket. No folding necessary unless they want (8yo folds, 6yo sometimes, but then he messes it up when looking for a certain shirt, lol). Room Standards - on my walls there is a printout in each room of what is considered "clean." I can randomly ask a kid to get a room up to standard, they can go down the list quickly and get it there. (My lists are actually broken into Daily, Weekly, and Monthly Standards, but I mostly focus on Daily.)

Newly married, my DH said he liked ham and lentil soup. He even had the recipe he liked the most. I'd never had it before, I don't think I'd ever had a lentil before, actually. I thought I would surprise him by making it. And I did! I followed the recipe to the T, not an i was left undotted cook-wise. My only problem was that I used split peas instead of lentils. (I continue to make Ham and lentil soup to this day, but I will never do anything involving split peas. )