This probably doesn’t help, but at 6th grade my DS would not or could not do much of any school work on his own. Even art was difficult for him. As much as it was frustrating for me, it took years to get him to where he could complete his school work independently. Just so you don’t lose hope - he is 21 now and is completely independent in his community college classes.

I’m impressed with how many people can remember that much detail about daily life at 11yrs old. I can barely remember being 11 much less what I ate or how I exercised.

We keep tools including knives in our vesicles general use, but not for the express purpose of cutting a seat belt or getting ourselves out of a wrecked car. In the event of an accident bad enough to require a seat belt cutter or a window punch, the contents of the car is likely to be rearranged to the extent that it would be difficult to locate the tool anyway. We do have plenty of tools that could be used to assist another driver should we come upon an accident. With that in mind, a letterman or other multitool could be handy to have in a vehicle.

Since it is a road trip, I assume you will have plenty of food, water, blankets, flashlights, small shovel, etc in case you get stuck somewhere for an extended time. I’d add a battery pack to recharge phones if the car won’t start.

I had my parent mail forwarded to my house when mom entered a nursing home. They have both passed away and they get more mail at my house than we do, and they have never lived here. I’m am sure that long after we move, they will still get mail here.

This doesn’t generally come up in elementary math because division with remainders is only taught through 4th or maybe early 5th grade. By the time division with negative numbers is introduced, students are diving to decimals rather than remainders.

I’ve done lots and lots of different weight loss programs over the last 20 yrs including Weight Watchers. I lost weight on all of them. I lost the most weight on one of those controlled programs where you only eat the food purchased from the program, but as soon as I stopped following the program, I began to gain weight again. I don’t think any one weight loss program is the “right” one. I like WW because it fits with how I like to eat. When I am following the program, I do lose weight even with including all the free foods, but what I like the best about WW is the community. I have a very close friend who does WW as well and we are frequently sharing recipes, meal ideas, etc. WW doesn’t work for my DD because she has lots of food issues and doesn’t like most of the free foods. She does better with straight calorie tracking.

It may also depend on what is causing your heal pain. I have flat feet, weak ankles, and I over pronate. I need shoes with lots of support and stability. I haven’t noticed much difference for my feet between my Hokas or Brooks. But I do feel a huge difference between $50 Walmart shoes and the $150 shoes. Saucony is another brand that I had good results with. My plantar faculties is practically gone and I attribute that to better quality shoes.

There is a place not too far from me that is similar to what you describe. It used to be all assisted living, but now it allows and advertises for anyone to rent there. I think the regular rent is a bit expensive for the area, but it does after AL services to residents with an extra fee. I don’t know if it has dining services, but I have seen that it offers a “club house” for all residents.

I’m not sure the following is helpful, but I do want you to know that there are other people going through this. My sister is in a similar situation with a son with many special needs. She is the physical target for his anger, and the police have been called to her home many times. The most difficult part is that even when they/the police want him in a facility, the few facilities that take kids his age are nearly always full. One time, the boy had to be taken 3 hrs away in the back of a police car to a hospital with the father following behind in his own car. The saddest part to me is that this boy’s brain is truly broken (he was adopted from Extreme abuse and drug exposure) and there is no good way to get him the help he needs. My sister is just biding her time until he turns 17/18 and will enter the adult criminal justice system. She is so broken down that she doesn’t see any other way out, and I don’t see one for her either. As I think about it more, I have had three different extended family members go through serious mental health challenges with kids ( all were adopted from foster care from abuse situations) that resulted in frequent police visits in 2 different states. It is a shame that our system has so little resources to help the kids and parents. All the IEPs in the world, meeting all the deadlines and following all the rules, didn’t do anything to help at home. My sister and her now ex are both sped teachers. A different family member with a different kid was also a SPED teacher. You can focus on fighting with the school, but that won’t make much difference. My sister does what she needs to do at home even when the school wants to handle things a different way. The only good thing I can think of in my sister’s case is that the boy doesn’t target his siblings. Another family member with a different child, allowed the boy to terrorize his sibling to the point that the sibling left home as soon as she could and avoids any contact with the now adult brother.

The no SS card seems very suspect to me. Doesn’t the kid have to have a SS number to be claimed on the parents income taxes. If she has a number and the patent won’t give the card, it isn’t that hard to get a replacement card.

That sounds like a book I read once where the teen girl finds out she was kidnapped at birth. She wasn’t allowed to get a driver’s license because the person who raised her didn’t have a birth certificate for the girl. I don’t remember in the story if the girl had a phone, but she wasn’t allowed to get a real job or go to college because the “mother” who had kidnapped her was afraid of getting caught. That was a fictional story though. In real life that sounds like an abusive situation.

UPS - have to be 21 to drive a truck, but they will hire younger for warehouse and seasonal. Has a strong union. Can be hard to get in, but I was told that they tend to hire people for full time that have worked seasonal for a couple of years. Hours aren’t great, mandatory overtime during the holidays, limited flexibility in work hours - can’t get off early for kid’s events and stuff like that. But the pay is good and so are the benefits. Still has pensions which is pretty rare these days.

If your state has medical marijuana but not recreational, would she let you take her to the doctor to get a card/prescription?

Maseca is what is sold here. Homemade tortillas are a staple here, but everyone seems to make four tortillas not corn.

I am still dealing with the last of my mom’s hoard. I think I’ve got all the household items sorted. Now I have to deal with her salt shaker collection and some art that may actually be worth some money, but I think I found a consignment art place that may take it. When I get done with her stuff, I do need to start on our own stuff. I am determined not to leave the same kind of mess for my own kids to clean up.

I’m not looking for any specific items. I just like going out and watching everyone else, and maybe finding a few good deal. I take that back, I do look for holiday food items on clearance such as bags of candy and the themed boxed mixes from Walmart. We go through such a small amount of wrapping paper now that I don’t bother to stock up after Christmas.

I am wearing my Bucee’s Christmas t-shirt right now. It makes me happy. And, there is a new Bucee’s under construction in Amarillo which is just 4 hours from my house. I am very excited about it.

Does it help if you can plan a vacation even if it is far in the future? That keeps me going through difficult times sometimes even knowing that the details and dates may change. To help me get through my DS’s difficult teen years, I had a vacation planned 4 years in advance for the fall after he graduated high school. Unfortunately, Covid interfered but I did get to take that vacation the following summer.

I just want to say that my parents did not put up stocking for adults kids who had moved out, so I don’t think that not having a stocking has to mean anything other than that the person doesn’t live there anymore. I know that seems to be different from what most hive members do, but it doesn’t have to be a big deal. Also, everyone grieves differently, and Gardenmom has been grieving the loss of this relationship. Just because she isn’t doing it the way someone else might, that doesn’t mean she is wrong.

Going to be a quiet holiday here with just me, DH, and 2 adult kids. I’ve got some gluten free Chex mix the oven for DS. Later I’ll prep a couple of small breakfast casseroles to cook tomorrow morning. DH will smoke some ribs tomorrow, and the sides are all store bought except for the GF cheddar biscuits (Red Lobster brand from a box) will bake tomorrow. I always try to incorporate things that I know each person likes, but after years of holidays not being “right” for my mother, I gave myself permission to quit trying to please everyone all the time. DH has to work the 3:00-11pm shift (law enforcement) today, and I hope everything stays quiet so he gets to come home on time. His regular days off are Monday and Tuesday this week, but he has to cover on-call tomorrow night because of other people taking vacation time. Again, hoping that the county stays quiet, but after a full day of extended family and alcohol, Christmas night usually results in a domestic call or two. Also hoping that the snow up in the mountains doesn’t get too heavy, So he can avoid late night traffic accidents. At least last year when we got stranded at DisneyWorld (not the worse place to get stranded) during the Southwest Airline collapse, One bright spot was that he couldn’t get called out to work on Christmas.

We got some flurries this morning. Just enough to hide all the mud from the big storm we had about 1 1/2 weeks ago.

I talk to the 18 yr old. I’d tell him that the next time he brings alcohol to your house that you will call the police on him, and then do it. He may not realize or care that there are legal implications on him. If it ever happens again I would not allow him in your home, or at very not allow him around your kids without your direct supervision. I don’t know that it matters if his parents are included in the discussion unless they are the ones providing him the alcohol. My DS, who is now 21, has had many friends who are younger than him, and for a time several were under 18. He had I had many discussions about how he needed to be careful because of potential legal implications for him. This included discussions about providing alcohol or weed (which is legal 21+ here), driving while intoxicated especially with a minor in the car, crossing state lines with a minor, and intimate activity with a minor. I have always told him that his friends are welcome in our home at any time, but that no illegal activity is allowed.

It’s all relative. 71 and humid is much better than 98 and humid. Can you put a fan on your porch? Can you go walking after dark? That what we used to do in Houston. I can remember in the summertime the kids didn’t really start playing outside until around 8pm. Are there any parks nearby that offer tree cover? Camping can be fun, but you’d have to drive quite a ways to get to better (cooler) weather, even then my camping season in Texas was late October through April. I don’t know how he does it, but my DS never seemed to care about the heat or let it curtail his activities. He would come home with sweat pouring off of him and just shrug and say “It’s hot”. Honestly, I got tired of the weather, and that was one factor in our move away from the gulf coast, but we are planning to move back to the gulf coast in a few years after my DH retires.

If you want it warmed, you can cut the slices first then reheat the slices in the oven. That will be much quicker than heating the whole thing at once.