These are great suggestions! We were recently given Turkish beach towels, which we fell in love with immediately. They are compact enough that even someone who already has some and perhaps has a lot of towels in general, would welcome them. We love ours so much that I recently converted all of our bath towels to Turkish and donated all of our old towels to the Humane Society. Given that I now have 12+ of these towels (that takes up 1/8 the space as the old towels), one would think I would not want more as a gift. But I would still be thrilled to get them. I would love to stash one or two in each car if I had extra, for instance. I also consider wool socks to be "consumable" and a great gift. I would LOVE cloth napkins and/or tea towels. And again, I would loosely consider those "consumables."

Oh wow. This is a provider that I have been recommending. I am a "retired" homeschool mom but we relied on several of his classes for the high school years. I guess I will have to change my recommendations. The people who seek help from me are exclusively secular and would be 100% appalled by this. Ew.

I always prefer consumables. I don't wear t-shirts and I have so many tote bags that I ave to regularly cull them. And like many people, I have so many Yetis of all sizes and shapes that ALL came as gifts or corporate swag that I have found myself culling those as well. I am constantly decluttering my small house so anything I can enjoy and use up is preferred. High quality candles (go unscented if you don't know about sensitivities) Wine Coffee beans Penzey spices (I will never forget the kind people that gave me my first sandwich sprinkles) Fancy teas Harry and David-style fruit/cheese/cracker box Fancy stationary/notebooks

I am not religious and have not attended a Palm Sunday service since attending with my family before I moved out for college 30 years ago, but I can still sing all of the words. ELCA representing! The children's choir, which I was a member between the ages of 6-12 had their own verse to sing alone. "The multitudes of children...." one. Perhaps that is why it is still such a vivid memory?

I don't think it can be attributed to age alone. I live where we drive on dangerous roads for 6+ months of the year. I am very familiar with what we are/were feeling and there have been many times when I have questioned if I should stop driving for my own sanity. The lingering trauma of even a near miss is very real. I too have had to drive groups of teens in 15 passenger vans in bad weather. It is terrible. I have no solution other than to question the stay-put option. Luckily, I no longer have to drive groups but the last year I did put my foot down and we missed a race because I would not allow the group (multiple vehicles) to travel in a blizzard. Some parents were very unhappy and ended up driving their own kids in order to not miss the race. I informed them that they were perfectly welcome to take over managing the group if they did not agree with my judgement. I have also held my own kid back from a trip in which I was not driving because I thought the conditions were too dangerous. No regrets.

I second the suggestion to see if you can find photos of the events. I say that because "formal" at my dd's school is not at all what I consider "formal." When I think "formal," I think suits, ties, and fancy long dresses. At dd's school it actually means not jeans. More like khakis and a button down for guys and church-like clothing for girls. So, I would for sure check. And I will put this one out there again...... Job fairs and interviews are getting a lot more relaxed these days. At dd's school, anything that fits, is clean, and does not have holes is perfectly fine. Even nice jeans. Just no t-shirts, hoodies, or sneakers. I watch every year as parents of college students go off buying suits they think their kids will use for interviews only to find they don't wear them once. Most will never even use them after graduation. My dd landed two internships at the job fairs so far.....wearing hiking pants and a plain shirt. The pants even have a HOLE in them but she colored her leg with black sharpie under the hole so it was not obvious. The girl is on a budget.

I have no idea, lol! I do know they drive a huge truck and just about fill it up so the trip might be worth it just to avoid dealing with that much package materials. Not to mention one has to drive 4 hours (one way) to do a lot of "normal people things" like car recall work, orthodontist appointments, furniture shopping, etc., so I am guessing their Costco habit started as a side-trip. I have noticed and been confused about finding Costco vodka for sale in other stores. Not in my own state but in a neighboring state. No idea how that works......

I don't live anywhere near one, so I have never been to one. But we do have friends that make the 8 hour round trip to the nearest one a couple of times a year and they "take orders" from friends. We enjoy cocktails on a not infrequent basis and the Kirkland vodka is huge, really inexpensive, and surprisingly tasty. So, we "order" a bottle or two whenever they go. It's a great deal! I am assuming they sell other spirits and wine but we have not tried them. Yet.

I do use the commercial raw food and it is expensive. Ours is delivered monthly. It is about $2 per day per adult cat. We do two meals a day (plus snacks for kittens). I use insulated automatic feeders so that we do not have to be home at meal time and to make it far easier to have a cat sitter when we travel. I load them once daily and they go off at 7am and 7pm each day. Like Spy Car, my cats start waiting at the feeders about 30 minutes before they are to go off and they attack the food until it is all gone. My 20yo cat was overweight before we switched foods when she was 10yo. She quickly settled at a healthy weight and both cats have maintained proper weight the whole time.

I switched our cats to raw food about 10 years ago. We have used different brands over the years and I even attempted to make it myself at one point (with taurine additive). We are currently using Darwin and have been happy with it. We switched when one of our cats was about 10yo and having a collection of health problems including crystals that the vet told us would mean a lifetime of prescription food. One look at the ingredients list of that stuff had me very concerned. Lots of fillers and grains. Up until then, we were feeding the cats a mix of high quality grain-free dry and canned foods. When we had to switch to the prescription food (which both cats ended up eating because I could not find a good way to feed them different foods) other health problems cropped up. There is no way to know if those health problems were diet-related or just a coincidence but there were other things that had me concerned. Both cats had flaking skin, oily coats, and dull eyes. I did a bunch of research and learned that a raw diet might also keep the crystals at bay without the junky food. My vet was not supportive, but we tried it anyway. The crystals never came back, the eyes brightened up again within weeks, and their coats also no longer were oily or flakey. The cat who had the crystals is now 20yo. The other cat we had at the time lived to age 22. And we now have a 3yo that has been eating raw since she weaned. The 20yo and 3yo have silky soft coats and no health problems. You would never guess how old the 20yo is. I would not even believe it except we have had her the whole time. The formerly unsupportive vet begrudgingly admitted that the food switch was a good choice. It does cost more than dry/canned food but the amount we have saved in vet bills more than makes up for it. Knowing what I know now, I would never ever feed cats dry food again. Not even the fancy stuff.

We had them last night too! They are pretty common here but last night's were some of the brightest I have ever seen. We could see them clearly in the middle of town, even.

I'm so sorry. I completely understand what you are feeling....a mix of helplessness, being overwhelmed, anger, concern, etc.... First, don't take the "won't qualify" advice as gospel yet. Contact your (or her) local Agency for Aging and try to get some basic information. If you have the resources, an elder attorney will be very helpful. Second, do NOT take her home or allow her husband to take her home. They cannot release her with no plan. Once they figure out that you are firm on this, the story probably will change. Third, as others have said, assisted living is not covered by Medicaid (or Medicare). Only skilled nursing (AKA nursing home) is, once they qualify. It sounds like there are enough assets to pay for a nursing home for at least a few months. I would first just get her into one, even if that means self-paying at first. Use those self-paying months to get the finances and legal sorted out. That facility will likely be a key help in applying for Medicaid since it is in their best interests once the money runs out. Her husband should be able to keep the house, but if he does not even want to stay, it might be easier on everyone to dispose of that property now. That is probably not the best "financial advice" but there are other factors to consider, like dealing with this all again in a few years, that might make the financial hit worth it. It does not sound like your dad wants or cares much about retaining assets. See about low income senior housing close to whatever nursing home is found. I investigated this heavily at one point and found that semi-independent (meaning perhaps there are some services like limited meals and activities), low income housing was available both in my person's location (HCOL, urban area) and my own (LCOL, rural) that could be attained within SSA income. There were waiting lists and I was told they were years long, but I did put my person on them and we got called up on most of those lists within a year, so it was not nearly as bleak as they led us to believe. Unfortunately, in our case, my person was not independent enough to be able to live in those anyway....which is probably why the lists move faster than they said.

We used to fly a LOT and I have seen just about everything. Our local airport has about a 50% on time/non-cancel flight rate so one almost has to assume something is going to change with travel plans. Since our flights are often cancelled or connecting flights missed, we are often rebooked on different flights and have no control over seating arrangements. With little kids, this often caused trouble. Like others, we often found ourselves in a situation in which we had to ask other passengers to switch seats in order to have direct parent supervision. In most cases, people were cool about it. But once, I could not get anyone to help us out. I was flying solo with a 3yo and no one would switch as we were both booked in middle seats on a full flight. I finally got someone to at least switch their middle seat for mine so I could be in the row directly behind the 3yo, but that was the best I could do. (I HAD booked seats together but we had a cancelled flight and this was the rebook) The 3yo was a real treat because we had just spent the night before in the airport and we were in the middle of the "potty tourism" phase that still gives me flashback nightmares. The people on either side of the 3yo refused to help, as was the case with the two people on either side of me. At one point, I even turned around and appealed to the entire plane asking if anyone would shuffle so we could sit together. No dice. There had been a whole string of cancellations and most of the passengers at this point were on their very last thread of sanity....many of us having spent the previous night in the actual airport. So we took off with my solo 3yo in a middle seat between two uncooperative people. It only took about 40 minutes of flight time in which the 3yo had gotten out of their seat at least 10 times, which meant the aisle seat person also had to get up, so the 3yo could "go potty," ask for a snack, ask for a toy, "go potty" again, ask for water, "go potty" again, needed shoe tied, "go potty," etc..... before the aisle person complained to the flight attendant. The flight attendant explained that they could not just toss the 3yo out the window and that person could either switch with me or deal. In their stubbornness, they chose to "deal." Then the flight attendant served my 3yo orange juice in an OPEN cup and you can guess what happened next. It did not even make it to the tray table as it got spilled during the transfer directly over the aisle seat passenger. The slightly soggy and VERY angry aisle seat passenger still refused to budge but the somewhat amused guy in the window seat finally offered to switch with me.....likely in a preemptive move to avoid being doused in the next beverage of choice. It was super awkward for me and angry aisle seat to have to deal with each other for the next 3 hours since my little potty tourist (who I at least moved to the window seat to minimize the damage) still need to verify that the potty did in fact still exist every 15 minutes, but at least I could keep the other interruptions to a minimum. I swear the flight attendant did the juice on purpose. I saw the slightest twitch of a grin as she sopped up juice from all over angry aisle seat person. However, I never saw evidence that an airline moved a selected seat because I had a kid traveling with me. If anything, we sometimes got special treatment.

Scammers have hit my person as well. But not before slow-moving dementia did. The early stages of dementia, before a person asks for or appears to need help managing finances, can also be a huge financial loss. My person theoretically had enough retirement savings to pay for LTC indefinitely but a long string of very poor and costly financial mistakes took out the bulk of that savings before I knew there was a problem. This mostly involved unnecessary major home renovations that were not only very expensive but also in very poor taste (as in did not add value to the home and actually significantly decreased the value of the home) and then getting taken for a ride on one of those "senior community" condos where you somehow pay astronomical monthly rent on top of a "partially refundable" deposit to the tune of $200K. We could only get the "partial refund" if they moved into that community's assisted living, which costs 3X what other local facilities cost. All of this was clear at the time of the deal but my person did not have the capacity to see how bad of a deal it was. And I did not even know the deal was being made until after it was final. Scammers may have been involved too. And they certainly have been enjoying the opportunity to drain what little is left. I never expected that Medicaid would be in our lives at any point but here we are. It can happen to anyone.

Medicare does not cover assisted living or nursing home care. It will cover some temporary at-home care in some cases as well as limited rehab facility time. I think what you are asking is about Medicaid, which will require a spend down of some sort. I would for sure find the social worker at the rehab place and start talking about options. They will have to most information on what needs doing for your location and at this transition time. They could get very pushy about insisting a family member take on full-time care at home, so come with your shield and armor.

Not to mention ridiculously confusing! I feel like one needs a BS-level degree in WDW-planning to even consider a trip. I don't even know what most of the words used in these posts about WDW even mean! WDW is 100% not our family's jam, so not an issue, really, but I do wonder how newbies actually plan one of these trips. Can you not just show up, buy tickets, stand in line for rides, and buy food at snack bars like it's 1985? Do you really have to have all these passes, bands, meal reservations, and stuff? I would think that would a be a bigger turnoff than the prices.

Ugh. Sorry! What you describe happens to me on a semi-regular basis and it really stinks. I am currently recovering from a neck "pop" from two weeks ago. It is nearly gone now but I can still tell it happened. I feel it happen every time. An innocent little "ping" or "pop" and I know I am going to be a world of hurt within 24 hours. Driving is the hardest. I find topical Biofreeze (or any other similar type thing) to be helpful. I cannot handle most pain killers so I don't have a lot of other options. I save it for when I know I need to do things that will be especially painful like driving or right before bed.

I would likely just let your kid(s) work it out. They are close enough to get anything they wished they had but did not bring and they won't know until they know what their laundry and dressing habits will be. I would *not* run out and buy suits. I live in a college town and I work at the university. The standards for interviews and career fairs have changed. It is usually fine to wear nice business casual to both here....even the business majors. In fact, my dd, who is a student, has landed two internships in her first two years wearing a nice pair of jeans (which in her case only means stain and hole free) and top. I watch the parents FB page for our school and there are always those parents scrambling to make sure their kids have suits and it really is not necessary. If you are legit concerned that dress clothes will be needed with no warning, a decent pair of dress pants, button down shirt, and tie will be more than adequate....and can be used for something else in the future. Whereas a suit is likely not even going to fit when/if they graduate and *might* need one. I also second the Express suggestion. Nice dress clothing that is contemporary and affordable.

Coming back to this again, as one of the "rule-breakers." I do understand the rules. No one would give a 6yo a bottle of tylenol to keep in their book bag at school. And I think most would agree that an 18yo should be able to. The line is somewhere in between, that line varies by kid/environment, and schools/groups have to draw that line where they cannot be considered liable. But, they should also then be required to have privacy policies in place as well as quick-access plans for meds that must be administrated on an as-needed basis. Inhalers and epipens are obviously in this category but there are a lot of less obvious situations like migraines, cramps, and anxiety that also need quick action. Those things are all very hard to implement well. I feel for the people in charge, really I do. But until/unless those things are addressed, I would allow my own offspring to break the rules understanding that they/I could be disciplined for it. I was the team manager for a travel sport that included kids with ages that spanned 13-19. We were ragtag enough that no one really worried about this. We had one or two kids over the years that needed help managing their meds, and we would arrange that individually with that family, but otherwise had no policy or rules. That was risky. We did a lot of other legally risky things like carpool during long travel and group lodging without reams of permission slips and waivers. I'm glad nothing happened as I am sure I would have been found liable if it had. And I am really glad I am not responsible for it now that the litigation situation seems to inflated. In fact, while I know this group still operates the way it did when I was in charge, it is likely that the only way to do it legally "correctly" would be to eliminate group travel and require each family to travel on its own. Which would be sad as we had many kids that never would have been able to compete had there not been a way for them to go independent of their parents. When these things get "too hard," people stop offering them.

Seems pretty normal to me. We also hated it and I do confess to being the parent who gave my kid the OK to just have her own meds and take them as prescribed....just don't get caught. But I realized this could have gotten us in trouble. We ran into this at summer camps and multi-day sports trips. We tried following the rules the first few times but it was terribly embarrassing (and inconvienient) to have to stand in line where everyone could see you during each med time. I 100% understand the rules and why they have them, but to me the deal is broken when they have these rules yet have nothing in place to protect the privacy of the medication takers. And one was an inhaler....which is used as-needed. It was ridiculous for them to expect someone who is having breathing trouble to go find whoever holds the meds, wait in line, or wait for the nurse station to be "open." Nope.

I am a couple years further along in a similar situation and the best piece of advice I can give is to try not to identify and attempt to "solve" every possible path this could take in your head. It will drive you crazy and most, if not all, scenarios are not what will actually happen. Since you are not in the driver's seat, you cannot control what measures should have been taken or what should be done now. You can continue to do what you are doing, visit, be present, gather as much information as you can, get to know the staff in every facility your mom is involved with. Find the social worker(s) and make friends. After that, just know that you will likely have to deal with whatever happens when it happens. It is very hard to plan ahead when there is no money. Many of your choices will be decided for you. The unknown is scary but it is also freeing to just decide that you will deal with whatever comes when it comes. I wish I could get back the many hours of sleep I have lost trying to scheme plans in my head for situations that did not happen. The only thing you can really do proactively is to make clear boundaries in your mind of what you, personally, are and are not willing/able to do. Write it down, share it with your spouse/family, and be resolved to be firm when decision time comes.

We make frozen pizza on a campfire sometimes, so I imagine it could be done. It might not be as good but if everything is pre-cooked, there should be no health risk.

The hood itself can be super cheap. You can probably get what you want for $200 or less. We installed an outdoor venting fan hood about 5 years ago and had a similar set-up. We had to take the exhaust pipe up into the cabinet above the stove. The rest of the cabinet is still usable but there is a duct coming up into it and then it turns and runs across the back of the top shelves of two adjacent cabinets before going out an exterior wall. We did it ourselves so there was not much in labor costs, just some ducting and related materials. Someone who actually knew what they were doing could probably do it in two hours so you would have to add that expense in. It actually took us about 6 hours but we did NOT know what we were doing and there was (borrowed) scaffolding involved as the vent exit is two stories from the ground on that side of the house. I will say it was worth every bit of cost and hassle. I cook a LOT and I also can a lot. The old through-a-filter fan hood was doing nothing to keep the moisture and/or heat down. And now with all the concern about gas stoves, which I do have, it is nice peace of mind that the air above the stove is being removed right away. I am super pleased with the exterior exhaust set-up.

Mine did do what we jokingly call "Roommate Tinder" to find a freshman year roommate. I didn't have an opinion either way and just stayed out of it as a parent. The university did have everyone do a questionnaire so that they had a good shot of decent matches for the people who did not find (or want to find) their roommate through the "Roommate Tinder." I will say that there were some bumps along the way with outreach to potential matches leading to rejection but in the end a match was found and they are currently the best of friends and are now living off campus together. So, it was well worth the effort in our case. The dorms at this particular university are "old school" with double occupancy rooms with communal bathrooms down the hall so I feel like a good match might be more important than cases where there are suites or other set-ups where people are not 24/7 on top of each other.

I went for two summers on nearly-full scholarship while in high school. Knickers included! I 100% loved it. One of my biggest regrets ever was passing up the opportunity to be a counselor there while in college because I had landed an internship that I thought would serve my career goals better. It is indeed very "campy" which I enjoyed. And corduroy might seem heavy in the summer but I can attest that I spent far more time being cold while attending than hot. 30 years of climate change might have changed things. My dd, who is a far more accomplished musician that I ever was, would have also loved attending but we did not have the funds available. She attended a much less prestigious camp that happens to be not far from Interlochen but still had a wonderful experience.