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Well, it's been a long time since I've had kids so young, but here's a hindsight view. While it's important to spend time with all the dc (obviously), it's also important to remember that those younger dc will be closely watching that oldest child to see how she does her school. So I'd say invest as much time as you can in that oldest dc at this point, counting on the younger dc to also pick up a lot of what you're teaching the oldest, and the dividends will be enormous down the road. So, IMHO, if it's the 9yo you're talking about, I think I'd lighten my load not by shipping her off to ps, but by spending more time with her and a little less with the younger ones. The first one just seems to be the hardest - sometimes. Also, maybe, ignore what the ps's are doing???? In other words, YOU set the standards for your dc ... not the ps's. HTH.

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We will be praying for your family. In Him, Kathy

Well, I'll bite since I have a few more minutes to kill. We've always done mostly WTM method. And now-20yod took the standardized test thru BJU (IOWA??) a couple years ago (highest level available) and scored well over 95%. For whatever that's worth??? Anyway, she did the Self-Teaching Guides, read tons of library books, wrote looong papers (I corrected them and passed them on to dh to correct the science aspects) complete with illustrations, did an occassional experiment and wrote it up, read the associated GB when applicable, and so on. This is how all our dc have done their science. I never liked the high school level stuff. Too watered down. And college level stuff can be a little overwhelming to younger dc. And esp. disliked the Christian curriculum I viewed - for various reasons. So this seemed the best fit for us. A better question here might be 'Is there any one here who follows the WTM program at all'.;) FWIW.

We also drink water. Straight out of the tap. We just finished our annual dental cleaning and check ups today (reason we're in town). In case no one has mentioned this (no time to read all the posts), I'll post it. Our dentist pointed out that hot and cold things actually cause slight expansion (for the hot) and the other thing for the cold (brain currently fried from too much town/dental). This can cause the cracked fillings like my dh has had so much of. He just had another one today. He's a coffee guzzler. Makes a giant pot or two every day and drinks the whole thing as hot as he can stand it. Then, proceeds to work and drinks more all day long. He also loads his cold drinks with ice (crushed, whole, whatever he can get his hands on) and crunches on it with his teeth. Yeesh! Gives me the shivers just to think about it. Anyway, he's had broken teeth, root canals, cracked fillings, you name it. None of the rest of us drink this kind of stuff though. And, so far, no such problems for the rest of us. Another note. Dh is also plagued by acid reflux. I know some of this is due to the lousy foods he finds to eat at work. But I notice it completely disappeared when he stopped drinking coffee several years ago (that lasted less than a year, btw). Such wonderful things to help motivate you, huh. ;) Anyway, good luck. Seems quitting coffee and tea must be like quitting smoking, from the looks of it.

Well, back at the blasted library and bored to death waiting for dc to finish things, so here I am again. May as well post a few things, eh? I've used GEICO for over 30 years. Never had a problem. Good service, fast, dependable. My father even used them when I was growing up and he was an excellent judge of things like that (insurance, mechanics, home repair things, etc.). Very thorough. He never bought a car without scouring Consumer Reports ratings, test driving everything, talking to his trusted mechanic ... that kind of thorough.

Yep, I'm at this same "stage". Technically, I only have one child left to hs now. I can see the end now. They already work independently, but there's this one last, big push (the math and logic) and then they'll truly be directing their own studies from there. (Of course, we'll always do some of the Bible together as long as they live here.) They passed me years ago in most areas, so I could see this coming a ways back. But now I can 'feel' it. It feels sooo good. :) (never thought I'd hear myself say that!) I'm already planning the next stage of my life. I talked to dh and he agreed I could buy myself a motorcycle (dirt bike) for buzzing around in the woods. I grew up riding motorcycles with my brother and dh. I used to ride them to work and to class in college (you can park right in front of the building ... no searching for parking places). I once had a cop stop me on my way to class when I was about 6 months pregnant with now-25yos. Told me my dh wasn't "taking care of me" because he let me ride a motorcycle when I was pregnant. lol I want all our dc to learn to ride, too. And also learn to work on them. Anyway, I don't flatter myself by thinking that I'll be missed, so to speak, here. I understand. I'm aware that our hs'ing is a little too close to the edge for this board. I just wanted to say that Jean makes an excellent point.

We use the see-through Rubbermaid containers. No tape or labels. I don't think that would help us much, since the reason food goes bad is usually because it's been shoved way in the back and we all forgot about it. Here's how we try to prevent that in our home. Dc take turns cooking, switching every week. It's their responsibility to dig through the frig and cabinets and see what needs to be cooked, pull out recipes for those foods and anything else they feel like cooking during their week, and make shopping lists for dh. This takes care of the fresh things, needing to be used up. If it's already cooked, it's also their responsibility to sort through it every day and put it out on the counter so we are sure to see and eat it. They have no problem remembering to do this because it's a whole lot faster to pull out containers and plop them on the counter than it is to whip up a meal.;) Obviously, though, this depends on the food and the season - can't leave much out in the heat of summer, but most things can sit out when it's cold (our kitchen is unheated ... we rarely turn on the ancient propane heater). We've been doing this for a year or two and it's worked well. It took some teaching time on my part in the beginning, but it has definitely been worth it. Now, the only reason food goes bad is because we didn't like the stuff in the first place (lousy recipe). :) HTH.

These are some of the things I've discovered over the years. Some would have helped lighten my load years ago had I thought to implement them. Specific for our family, as usual, but may be a useful springboard for ideas if anyone is interested. Let dh do the shopping. It took some getting used to, but this alone gives us oodles more time to do school, work around the house, etc. Be sure to make very specific lists. Turn the house/property over to the dc. Seriously. I did this a few years ago and it has worked beautifully (note ages below - your dc may be much younger than mine were at the time ...). They maintain the whole thing now. 18yod even recently began paying all the bills and dh is teaching her to handle all aspects of the money - slowly - then she will teach the next one and so on. One way to think about it is this: if you are planning for your dc to go away in their teens (college or whatever), what will they have to know to function and not be taken advantage of? Another way to look at it is like we did. Should dh and I be killed in an accident tomorrow, what would dc need to know in order to run the house/property? (Our will leaves all of it to the 5 youngest dc.) I found they were much more capable of doing everything that needed to be done than I had realized, once I altered my thinking. Stay home. Cut out all outside activities. This might drive some mad, but it had the opposite effect for me. After a couple of weeks, my brain clears and I can feel the creativity begin to flow. A trip to town really stiffles it. And, of course, there's the obvious time element. Dc even notice the same kinds of things. Cut off the internet. Yep. I'm at the library. Only use it when dc need to do library work. In particular, I found that the more time I spent actually doing school with dc and the less time I spent reading about how to do it (via books, the boards, etc.), the more I got done. We all went vegan. Easier to cook and plan, for us. Now, for a few more simpler things. We all use sleeping bags instead of the traditional top sheet and bedspread. Saved me tons of time when I accidentally discovered this trick. Bought about 20-30 of those plastic, child's cups (hold 8 oz. or so) and a big basket with a handle. When anyone wants a quick drink, they use these. Can fit many more into the dishwasher and easy to unload - just grab the basket and toss them in. Divided the chores into 5 general areas (to equal the number of dc we have) and posted 5 lists on the frig. Dc put their names on magnets and all they have to do is switch the names every week. Let them make up their own schedules. I tell them the group things which must be included and they get together and make up schedules and give them to me so's I know where I have to be when. School year round. We've always done this. I like being able to take off at any time of year. Well, ds just informed me he's done, so I have to go. Birthday stuff. HTH.

Allowing them to eat with their (clean!) hands when they're little seemed to help our dc. Example: They had a hard time with salads so I served them a couple of whole lettuce leaves, whole grape tomatoes, whole carrots, whole mushrooms, etc. They ate every piece. Also, we clean and quarter bell peppers and leave them in the frig in a ziploc bag to be eaten. Dc esp. like the red ones. If prep time is annoying to you, you can zap in the microwave and slice with the food processor. Example: For 7 of us, we take 2 heads of broccoli (or cauliflower) and chop off the stems. Chunk the green part, rinse, toss into a bowl, seal with plastic wrap, zap, and eat. We leave it sitting on the counter and munch all day (still with the hands!). For carrots, clean and slice with processor. Seal as above, zap, eat. For frozen brussel sprouts, dump a couple bags into bowl, zap, and eat. (Be sure to cook long enough or they turn out bitter.) Be sure to drain off any water on any of the above. The veggies reabsorb the water and get soggy if they sit in it. Yuk. We do frozen veggies the same way, or cook in a pot with a tiny bit of water in the bottom. To roast potatoes, preheat oven to 400 degrees. Clean and chunk potatoes, bite-size. Spread in single layer in 9 x 12 glass cass. dish. (We don't grease the dish.) Sprinkle with salt or whatever you like. Bake, uncovered, for about 45 minutes. We can eat 5 lbs. of potatoes in one day like this (using 2 big cass. dishes). They taste a little like fries. For fries, cut potato into fry shapes, spread out on plate, salt, and zap until very chewy - about 20 (?) minutes. You'll have to experiment. These are better than greasy fries. Anyway, just a few more ideas. HTH.

Well, there are 9 seatbelts (1999 Sub) and dd, who's sitting beside me here at the library, says there's no crack in the backseat. She also says it's comfortable; but it does look like less leg room in the very back seat. The middle seat is fine. Generally, our dd's sit in the back because they're shorter. They all generally have a bag of books beside them, too. You can remove the very back seat and turn the middle seat completely down. This fall we hauled a load of siding for the house this way. (also piled a lot of other materials on top of the siding) However, only 3 people fit in the car this way (officially). Also, on the back, we have the doors that open down. The glass lifts up. This way you can leave the glass up if you're hauling something too long for the car. Let it stick out the back with an something orange tied to it. The Sub's do seem to be shrinking though. Maybe you could find a used one ... HTH

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Thanks, ladies, for the replies. You all deserve some kind of medal for reading such a long post. I hope y'all have a wonderful holiday season and New Year. See you next year! :seeya: (They didn't seem to have any Christmas thingy's, but he's kinda cute.)

We own a 1999, GMC Suburban. 96,000 miles on it. Seats 9, 4WD. Never had any problems with it. Gets about 16mpg for the kind of driving we do (35 miles to town). I love it. Wish we'd bought one years ago instead of the Ford Aerostar van (a real lemon:glare:). It's a comfortable ride and has leg and book room for all of us (7 people, youngest dc is 15yo). We use it to haul firewood with our trailer, haul junk to the dump in the trailer, plow our 3.2 mile gravel driveway after the rare snowfall, and so on. We can also fit all the shopping into it along with all the people - a real plus. And it's fun to ride through the woods in it. Also, I feel a little safer when teaching dc how to drive, if you get my drift. ;) (Note: another thing that helps me feel safer is the bright, red and white, magnetic "STUDENT DRIVER" signs stuck to each side and the rear of the car. I highly recommend these. Bought them on the net. Other drivers seem to be a little more patient - or wary- when they see those signs. But be prepared for a lot of gawkers.:)) We do, however, stay home as much as possible. I'm not running a taxi service for dc and dh does 95% of the family shopping. (He drives a Toyota Matrix, 4WD, and carpools with another guy.) The high mileage comes from our trips (rare, these days). A couple of things we added to it that have really helped: mud flaps - if you travel dirt roads, helps keep the gunk out from under the car as well as off the sides running boards - if you're shortish, something to stand on when climbing into the car cloth upholstery - for the seats, esp., so you don't 'stick' to them in hot weather (I hate leather seats ... and couches, etc. A saleswoman at a furniture store once tried to sell us a leather couch. When I blurted out 'Yuk!' after she suggested leather - not known for my tact - she dropped the 'sales' look and admitted that the only people who bought leather were people who had never owned it before. For what that's worth.) HTH.

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Yes, yes. :iagree: Similar situation with my mother, only after we changed our phone number and asked her to write letters instead (easier to deal with), she cut out all contact of her own accord. This was years ago and I noticed the other day that when I refer to her (rarely), I use the past tense, as if she's dead. Guess I mourned that loss ages ago, you could say. Also, scubamama, let dh protect you and dc. That's his job. Plus, there could be other things that happened that he's not told you; thus his strong reaction. Men are like that you know. Let him lead. HTH.

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Maybe you could take (slow?) walks with them, if they're able. There's something about the outdoors that sometimes takes the 'sting' out of tense relationships. And it can reduce the tension, too. No need to feel guilty about how you've had to handle the parents. There are many of us in the same boat, for one reason or another, often nothing whatsoever to do with us. If you could find a single verse to focus on, that might help. Once, my mil was in route to our house and we were having a lot, lot, lot of problems with her. I was so downright scared, I couldn't concentrate on anything. But I did gather enough of myself together to pick up my Bible and flip through it. I landed on 2 Tim. 2:7: "For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." It brought instant calm to my scattered brain and soul, and I was able to cope with the whole visit with a wonderful peace. HTH.