Moms of boys, I need help re: finding comfortable underwear.

[Whisperlily]

My son is almost 10, and has some sensory issues. Recently (within the last 2 months) he's been "adjusting" himself often, and has started to seem very uncomfortable walking at times. I asked him about it, and he says it's because things "move around" while he's walking, and it bothers him.

 

*DH says everything looks fine, same as usual. (He's a small boy, a bit young for his age, so no "changes" that might be causing the problem.)

*We tried smaller, more snug underwear. He felt better in those for one day, then went back to being uncomfortable.

*We made sure he's getting things clean (and dry), on a daily basis.

*He was wearing boxer-briefs, and is now wearing regular briefs.

 

Any ideas about what to try next? He does have sensitive, dry skin that sometimes reacts to elastic/certain fabrics, etc. But it's the same underwear that he's worn for months without a problem.

[lionfamily1999]

Could it be possible there are some pre-pubescent issues arising???

 

My ds loves his boxer briefs and even likes regular boxers, except they're hard to get straight inside your pants (so they are not all wrinkled up). Maybe regular boxers? Or, you could even try long johns for a spell and see if that helps, I prefer that to straight out commando for my ds.

[Ria]

Have you tried boxers (not boxer briefs)? That's what my boys wear. they don't like the snugness of briefs or boxer briefs.

 

Ria

[Chelle in MO]

My son is almost 10, and has some sensory issues. Recently (within the last 2 months) he's been "adjusting" himself often, and has started to seem very uncomfortable walking at times. I asked him about it, and he says it's because things "move around" while he's walking, and it bothers him.

 

*DH says everything looks fine, same as usual. (He's a small boy, a bit young for his age, so no "changes" that might be causing the problem.)

*We tried smaller, more snug underwear. He felt better in those for one day, then went back to being uncomfortable.

*We made sure he's getting things clean (and dry), on a daily basis.

*He was wearing boxer-briefs, and is now wearing regular briefs.

 

Any ideas about what to try next? He does have sensitive, dry skin that sometimes reacts to elastic/certain fabrics, etc. But it's the same underwear that he's worn for months without a problem.

I have a boy that went through this very thing a year or so ago. Regular, loose boxers were the solution for him. They didn't stop the "adjusting" altogether, but what a marked improvement! We've found that they tend to run a bit small, like other underwear items, so you might take that into account.

 

Boys are fun in endless ways, huh? ;)

 

Chelle

[Whisperlily]

Thanks, gals.

 

I don't think there are any prepubescent issues... but he is our oldest boy, so maybe there are things we're not anticipating? He's around the size of a very slender 8 year old, though he'll be 10 in a few weeks. He has only grown one inch in the last year, and DH says there are no physical changes in that area.

 

His complaint is about "things" moving around too much when he walks, so wouldn't boxers, or loose underwear make this more of a problem? Since he wears a size 8 pants and underwear run small, he had been wearing size 10 boxer briefs. We tried his brother's size 8 briefs and they were still too big. I bought some size 6's, and they seem to be a good fit. (He wears pants with adjustable tabs, so a size 6 may be appropriate.)

 

I also had a thought, that we did recently change laundry detergent, so I'll have to ask if any of his other clothing bothers him. The "adjusting" is so obvious I may have overlooked other things.

[buddhabelly]

They are boxers, but called "boxer briefs" because they fit closely. They are Hanna Andersson, size Large. I believe your boy could use a Large. They also make briefs up to size Large, which my son has been wearing for years. They are the only underwear he will wear. (Echo, echo, echo......)

 

Julie

[Chelle in MO]

Thanks, gals.

 

I don't think there are any prepubescent issues... but he is our oldest boy, so maybe there are things we're not anticipating? He's around the size of a very slender 8 year old, though he'll be 10 in a few weeks. He has only grown one inch in the last year, and DH says there are no physical changes in that area.

 

His complaint is about "things" moving around too much when he walks, so wouldn't boxers, or loose underwear make this more of a problem? Since he wears a size 8 pants and underwear run small, he had been wearing size 10 boxer briefs. We tried his brother's size 8 briefs and they were still too big. I bought some size 6's, and they seem to be a good fit. (He wears pants with adjustable tabs, so a size 6 may be appropriate.)

 

I also had a thought, that we did recently change laundry detergent, so I'll have to ask if any of his other clothing bothers him. The "adjusting" is so obvious I may have overlooked other things.

For my son, I think it was not an issue of things moving around, but that when *he* moved, his "stuff" didn't! Like it was too restricted and needed to just BE. Regular briefs were too confining and things would get bound up in one place instead of having freedom to adjust or move when his body did. Boxers seemed to be the answer for him in that he wasn't as "bound up" any longer.

 

I guess the bottom line is...his boys didn't need a house!

 

Hopefully, if he finds this thread some years from now, he won't be mad at me!

 

Chelle

[Julie in CA]

My son is almost 10, and has some sensory issues. Recently (within the last 2 months) he's been "adjusting" himself often, and has started to seem very uncomfortable walking at times. I asked him about it, and he says it's because things "move around" while he's walking, and it bothers him.

I am sympathetic about the sensory issues, but at the same time, may I gently suggest that even if you can't solve that component of the problem, it may be something where you have to flat-out lay down the ground rules?

 

I've told my allergy-prone kid that under no circumstances is he to pick his nose in public. Ever. Public includes public areas of our home. He's free to pick away in the privacy of the bathroom, if he must, but he must exercise self-control in public in order to not offend other people, or give them a wrong impression about himself.

 

I find it incredibly offensive to see men "adjusting" themselves in public, and some of them do it so obviously and un-self-consciously. I'm not sayin' your ds, at such a young age, is offensive in any way, just that I'd work on the sensory issue while *at the same time* laying down the law a bit. At different times, I've had to tell all of my boys that adjustments in public aren't ok, so your ds isn't alone! (-but I wouldn't let it go on) :001_smile:

 

Hey, I just thought of one more thing. I just remembered that one of my boys was less comfortable as he got older, especially with sports, etc, going on. I bought him some powder for the area, and it helped. I understand that heat/moisture is probably not causing your ds's trouble, but a bit of powder might change the sensory thing in an unexpected way. (?)

[Sparkle]

I am sympathetic about the sensory issues, but at the same time, may I gently suggest that even if you can't solve that component of the problem, it may be something where you have to flat-out lay down the ground rules?

 

 

I find it incredibly offensive to see men "adjusting" themselves in public, and some of them do it so obviously and un-self-consciously. I'm not sayin' your ds, at such a young age, is offensive in any way, just that I'd work on the sensory issue while *at the same time* laying down the law a bit. At different times, I've had to tell all of my boys that adjustments in public aren't ok, so your ds isn't alone! (-but I wouldn't let it go on) :001_smile:

 

 

:iagree:

 

My ds had this issue a couple of years ago, I think when he was about 8. We basically had to bribe him - we offered him a small amount of money for every day that he went without "adjusting" himself. It only took a couple of days. I think he had just gotten into the habit of doing it, and it was unconscious. He absolutely prefers regular briefs, BTW, not boxer briefs or boxers.

[ThriceBlessed]

They are boxers, but called "boxer briefs" because they fit closely. They are Hanna Andersson, size Large. I believe your boy could use a Large. They also make briefs up to size Large, which my son has been wearing for years. They are the only underwear he will wear. (Echo, echo, echo......)

 

Julie

 

:iagree:

 

My son loves his HA undies. They don't have a tag,the elastic is fully encased and they are very soft too.

 

Julie- HA undies go up to size XL btw. :)

 

Blessings,

[Suzanne in ABQ]

I can imagine that walking around with an erection would be uncomfortable, especially if he didn't know what was happening. He may be embarrassed to tell you. Does he know to expect it, and that it's normal, and that it always goes away within a few minutes, and that his clothes might fit funny during it? My ds started having them around that age.

 

Just a thought, to go along with the other ideas you've received.

[asta]

I also had a thought, that we did recently change laundry detergent, so I'll have to ask if any of his other clothing bothers him. The "adjusting" is so obvious I may have overlooked other things.

 

I would go back to the original detergent and see if the issue self-resolves.

 

If it doesn't, I'm with Suzanne - my son started about the same time.

 

I found that the no-fly undies from Target, which have a very thin waistband, were very good. They may yet be too big for him (I had gotten the smallest size in the men's section), but it's worth a look to see if they have any in the boys department.

 

 

asta

[Tracey in TX]

DS loves his sliders. It's sports underwear with shorts to wear during soccer. They're called sliders because when a boy slides, he gets bruised.

DS,10, doesn't adjust himself there while wearing the sliders. Regular underwear drive him bonkers. Plus, there is a snack pocket in the front of the sliders. (DS thought it held snacks for the game. It's actually for the sports cup!:lol:)

[Stacy in NJ]

You could try underarmour. Made of a smooth, silk like material that's easy on the skin, usually athletes use them because they reduce friction due to sweating.

[Nestof3]

All three of my boys wear boxer briefs.

[Murphy101]

are you sure it's the undies?

maybe the pants are too snug or not snug enough?

or maybe he's just developed a habit of adjusting himself? got in the habit of doing it all the time when things were uncomfortable and now conintues without really giving it much thought? kind of like knuckle popping?

[dirty ethel rackham]

Snack pocket!!! Hilarious. :lol

[CactusPair]

Hanna Andersson undies might help.

[SapphireStitch]

I'm going to vote for changing the detergent back. In our family we are all, male and female alike, sensitive to using the wrong detergent on undies. Even with the kind that doesn't bother us as much I still run the undies on a special cycle with a double rinse just to be sure all the residue is out.

 

But I also know about boys and nervous habits, and you might have to do what others have suggested and remind him to stop himself from adjusting. I have a friend whose son was doing that and also (can't think of any genteel way to put this) scratching his butt. She had a talk with him, and then when she'd see him doing either thing in public she'd just say "Son...self-control, remember self-control." Which I thought was a nice tactful way to remind him without saying "Boy, get your paws off your parts!!" :001_smile:

[Whisperlily]

Thank you so much for all the ideas and responses. You had a lot of good ideas, and I felt a bit better knowing there are others in the same boat. :)

 

I agree with those who find it offensive to see boys/men "adjusting" in public, so there's no shortage of reminders that he needs to keep his hands off. :)

 

I think we did figure out the problem, which may or may not be related to the laundry detergent. His skin is very dry, and his eczema has suddenly appeared in full force again. At an appointment for a separate issue, I asked the Dr. about it, and he thought it was most likely a general skin issue.

 

On the bright side, in the process we tried a lot of new things, and DS has a thorough education on personal hygeine. :)

 

And I learned a few new things about boys underwear options. (Thinking I'm going to have to check out Hanna Anderson's boxer briefs, and "sliders" simply because my boys are so active...)

[Julie in CA]

I think we did figure out the problem, which may or may not be related to the laundry detergent. His skin is very dry, and his eczema has suddenly appeared in full force again. At an appointment for a separate issue, I asked the Dr. about it, and he thought it was most likely a general skin issue.

 

Oh, poor guy! I hope the doctor can provide some relief.