21st birthday in quarantine?

[ktgrok]

My oldest turns 21 in July. We will probably be pretty opened up, but not night club opened, and night clubs are not really his speed anyway. Any thoughts on making it special for him, given that bar crawling with friends won't be happening (and I think most of his friends, but not all, are younger than him anyway). Was thinking DH could take him out to a brew pup or something that has outdoor seating? But we are talking Florida in July...outdoor sucks, lol. 

Keep in mind, he may be at higher risk. His father AND his father's sister (son's aunt) both had sudden onset cardiomyopathy as adults...one in his twenties, the ohter in her 40s. Father's was said to be the most likely from a reaction to a viral illness. Aunt refuses to share any real info. His father died years later from heart failure, the sister - my son's aunt - got a heart transplant and lived. When the sister had it happen too we went from "random thing" to "probably genetic" but father died before getting genetic testing and sister refuses to believe it could be genetic (I know....I think she doesn't want to think she might have passed anything to her kids) and without knowing what they have, the cardiologist said that testing my son would be looking for a needle in a haystack. Father likely had some kind of genetic syndrome - cardiomyopathy of unknown type, autoimmune kidney disease that required a kidney transplant which also later failed, skeletal malformation, and keloid scarring. Son has some scoliosis, but so far that is all...he follows up with a cardiologist every few years for an echocardiogram in hopes of catching any cardiomyopathy quickly, before more damage is done, if it happens. And of course, COVID causes great strain on the heart, can infect it, etc....so yeah. We are being more cautious than many, and in my county case numbers are currently rising each day. 

Son is taking it seriously, still volunteering but outdoors, working at a vet office but curbside service only,  wears a mask when interacting with the public ( I know he's wearing it because he actually asked me to please make him more so he can switch them out more often). 

so...how do we have some kind of acknowledgement of the big day, without compromising safety? Don't get me wrong, I'm GLAD he's not going bar crawling...I hate that stuff...but also know I regret that my 21st birthday was drinking half a mudslide at a Ruby Tuesdays and going home. 

He likes DH, his step father, and so something with him might be good, I just don't know what. Maybe having one of his over 21 friends come over and do some whiskey tastings (DH is big into whiskey/scotch), or???? 

[marbel]

I think the whiskey tasting sounds good, or make a beer-friendly dinner with a beer-tasting flight.  Our son's 21st birthday was pre-quarantine, but he chose a brewpub for dinner and did a beer flight. He discovered that beer isn't his thing, lol. Our daughter asked for margaritas with her 21st birthday dinner, which was also pre-quarantine.  Oddly, neither of our kids were/are interested in wine though that is the main alcohol consumed in this house. But a wine-tasting could be fun too if that is something he'd like. 

[Selkie]

Does he want to do something involving alcohol?

I'm just asking because when I turned 21, some members of my family were insistent that I had to go out and order a drink, but that was not something I was interested in doing at all.  

[Tree Frog]

I have a dd who turns 21 next month who had been doing some drinking with her friends at college. Now she's living at home and wants to be able to try what she'll be legal for, but dh doesn't want her to drink in our house. I don't want her to go out and drink by herself (she doesn't have local friends). I'm going to follow along for ideas because in our house this has the potential to cause major problems.

[almondbutterandjelly]

Grill steaks and drink beer? 

[vonfirmath]

38 minutes ago, Selkie said:

Does he want to do something involving alcohol?

I'm just asking because when I turned 21, some members of my family were insistent that I had to go out and order a drink, but that was not something I was interested in doing at all.  

This is what I was thinking. I did nothing involving alcohol on my 21st birthday.

 

[Pen]

A home (or raptor center if he still goes there and they’d allow it?) or if close enough dates a combo with July 4,  ... not too big and overwhelming a celebration.  Alcohol opportunity, but not too much. 

Beer or wine or even champagne type thing or gin and tonic on ice maybe  (could be nice in heat with low alcohol plenty of ice) option if he wants it, not if not, and a sort of meal he’d like—steak? Chicken? Chicken nuggets? Slaw?   Or Fajitas? 

And GF birthday cake or a substitute. 

Or maybe to avoid great heat a brunch with mimosas option? 

 

Or family plus perhaps a couple special friends for a meal at a restaurant of his choice that is open and safe distanced outside.  Do any in your area have summer water mister machines to cool outdoors patio eating?  And a special desert port could be an option to cap off such a meal instead of starting with a drink.  

(Personally I would not probably go toward whisky as an intro to alcohol. )

 

Edited May 26, 2020 by Pen

[ElizabethB]

You could do whiskey brackets at home, invite a few folks, decorate, have yummy food.  

https://milehighbourbon.com/2019/03/07/colorado-distillery-bracket/

Younger friends could do Pepsi/coke tasting unlabelled and see if they can tell the difference, the whiskey could be the same, unlabelled see if folks can tell which is which or not.

Edited May 26, 2020 by ElizabethB

[Pen]

5 minutes ago, Danae said:

Thirding this.  Ask him what he wants to do. Or ask him what he would want to do if not for quarantine restrictions and then try to think of ways to approximate that. 

 

I like this better than my own ideas. Fourthing.

[ktgrok]

1 hour ago, Selkie said:

Does he want to do something involving alcohol?

I'm just asking because when I turned 21, some members of my family were insistent that I had to go out and order a drink, but that was not something I was interested in doing at all.  

I will definitely ask him, but he's been allowed to have alcohol on special occasions, one drink, here at home or if in a big family group for a while now, so I do know he enjoys some alcohol. 

[katilac]

57 minutes ago, Danae said:

Thirding this.  Ask him what he wants to do. Or ask him what he would want to do if not for quarantine restrictions and then try to think of ways to approximate that. 

I like this idea.

If he and his friends don't normally drink, they're quite likely to hate any kind of whisky, wine, or beer, lol. The low-level drinkers I know in that age bracket are all about either flavored cocktails or flavored hard seltzer. The Whiteclaw generation 😄

Edited May 26, 2020 by katilac

[Pen]

Non-alcohol strawberry margaritas for the little kids: yum!

[rebcoola]

Funnest party I've ever been to was a beer tasting.  A dozen growlers with different beers. They had made little scoring cards. 

[lmrich]

Champagne toast is fun! 

We just decorated and got some nice take-out. She went to the liquor store - wearing a custom Happy Birthday mask. We made a few drinks and talked and laughed together. I made her a really pretty balloon arch and got big 21 balloons so we could take her picture... 

Not exactly the party she and her roommate had planned. 

[hippiemamato3]

I'd plan to go out for dinner at a place that also has a bar. That's what we did for my 21st. Have fun - it's a milestone!