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Sophomore ds is moving home over Christmas. Update


FaithManor
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He is going to commute to U of MI two days per week for a German class and an English class in his major since he could schedule them on the same day. He will take one other course online. So long as he takes a spring term class so he ends the academic year with full credits, he will not lose his scholarship.

 

It is his leg. He is in a lot of pain and struggling to handle that physically and emotionally. He wants to go back to his physical therapists and orthopedic doctor and not try to figure this out from campus. He isn't eating well either and vitamin d levels are too low.

 

My mama heart hurts for him. Being home will allow us to help him with a treatment plan and eating our family meals combined with supplements will help a lot. He will also have our tub. Soaking is very soothing and his efficiency apartment only had a shower. But his youngest brother, our high school senior, was enjoying living out from under his brother's shadow and is unhappy about this development. Very unhappy.

 

Sigh....

 

UPDATE:

 

He will not be moving home full time until his apartment lease is up the end of the first week of February. He is signed up for 4 credits of German on campus and 4 credits online one 3 credit class in his major, and one credit of health/stress management which is a required gen ed. He will be coming home for PT until the lease expires and then living here full time and making the long commute to campus for his German classes but the class meets t/th and so does the philosophy club he leads so he does not have to give that up.

 

He will take a spring term 3 credit class and a 4 credit environmental science class in the summer which will bring him to 15 credits plus this semester's 17. So he will be on schedue his junior year. Hard to say if his leg will be well enough to move back to college then or not. Unless the leg improves a lot, his fall 2017 study abroad in Germany plans will be on hold.

 

He has been home for a few days now and today is a snow day - 7 inches yesterday and big pile up on the freeway near campus so no classes. He is cozied up in the recliner - his leg cramps less that way than in bed, and since he knew he did not have class nor driving today, agreed to take a muscle relaxant last night. Slept like a baby. I am going to make him an omelette and remind him to take his calcium, D3, and magnesium which he has been forgetting a lot! So he needs to set an alarm on his phone to remind him to take them.

Edited by FaithManor
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I'm sorry.   :grouphug:   Our dd came home recently too so that we could help her with ongoing health concerns.  This isn't what anyone really wanted.  (I mean, we love having her home!  But wishing the circumstances were different...)  It's so hard to see our children go through struggles...

 

I'm glad your ds can continue with his studies and not lose his scholarship.  Maybe this time with your two ds's together will actually bring positive changes in their relationship!

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I'm sorry to hear that he's struggling; and that your younger son is not happy.  I have a nearly 16 yr old son who loves his older brother (he's in his last year at univ.), but does find it really difficult to adjust to the changed dynamic when older brother comes home for any extended time.

 

Hopefully, with school and any other activities your older son does, the two are kept busy enough to enjoy each other when they see each other, and not get in each other's way when they're both at the house.  

 

 

 

 

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Sorry to hear.

 

It sounds selfish of me but this why I don't want my 17 year old son to go to school out of state/far away. He has a chronic health issue and gets treatment every 2 months. Plus lots of calls for advice to the doctor.

 

Hoping he feels better soon!

 

This was true for our ds with multiple issues as well. He lives on campus, but less than an hour away. When he needs support, he comes home. Sometimes a weekends worth of healthy sleep and meals, coupled with some emotional support and encouragement can make a huge differences. It was a huge relief when he chose to stay close. 

 

I'm really sorry your ds is struggling. It hurts our mama hearts for sure, but I'm glad you can let him come home and have both the freedom and support he needs. I'm sorry for younger brother too. My youngest was SO happy to get out of Ds's shadow. I think her greatest fear was that he would come back before she could leave (he didn't). I have seen this issue first hand and know how hard it is on everyone.

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He is going to commute to U of MI two days per week for a German class and an English class in his major since he could schedule them on the same day. He will take one other course online. So long as he takes a spring term class so he ends the academic year with full credits, he will not lose his scholarship.

 

It is his leg. He is in a lot of pain and struggling to handle that physically and emotionally. He wants to go back to his physical therapists and orthopedic doctor and not try to figure this out from campus. He isn't eating well either and vitamin d levels are too low.

 

My mama heart hurts for him. Being home will allow us to help him with a treatment plan and eating our family meals combined with supplements will help a lot. He will also have our tub. Soaking is very soothing and his efficiency apartment only had a shower. But his youngest brother, our high school senior, was enjoying living out from under his brother's shadow and is unhappy about this development. Very unhappy.

 

Sigh....

I'm sorry and I hope your son heals completely and quickly.  (Don't know the backstory, but praying all goes better than expected). 

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DS21 came home at the end of his freshman year and said he wasn't going back - he just couldn't handle the cold and the dark (seriously northern university). He transferred to the local branch and is doing well. Mental health much improved and living at home means he has support and decent food. He now has friends again and is active in his beloved theater program.

 

Best wishes for your son, OP. Hope the change makes things easier for him.

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Thanks everyone. I have high hopes that his medical team will figure this out. I do wonder if he should in the future transfer go a warmer climate. It is just hard to imagine the finances. Out of state tuition and likely not a match of his merit aid here.

 

He will go back to PT, and my parents have a jacuzzi tub which might help him. He has muscle atrophy, not enough exercise which comes from taking up 18 credit hours plus heading up the philosophy club and doing t.a. work in the English department as well as music theory. So giving up the t.a. work and dropping to part time for one semester will hopefully give him time to build those muscles back up and work on a maintenance plan. The cold is very hard on him though.

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