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A little TMI post about B/C options


DesertBlossom
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We are pretty sure we're done having babies. Neither one of us really wants to do anything permanent. I don't want to get an iud. I don't want to be on the pill. That leaves NFP and condoms, which we have done with a certain degree of success in recent years.

 

I still have 10+ years of fertility to worry about and I am considering a diaphragm. Anyone have experience with this? With or without spermicide? I am thinking of using this in addition to tracking my (irregular) cycles and using condoms.

 

I am just putting off making an appointment, because if I understand correctly, I have to be fitted for the right size.

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I tried a diaphragm for a couple years. It's easy to use once you know how. My ob-gyn fitted me, removed it, told me how to insert/remove it, then had me practice on my own before he gave me the prescription. (He used lubricant for this vs spermicide, and no, he didn't stay during the practice. lol ) I might have liked it more but I had a problem with the spermicide. (**TMI Alert!**) It made me itch. Inside. Where you can't actually scratch. Ugh! I never got an infection or anything and the itch (best way to describe what it was) didn't last long after the diaphragm was removed. But still. A friend of mine used one for years and years without issue. It just didn't work for me.

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http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2014/09/14/sunday-review/unplanned-pregnancies.html?_r=0

 

Please consult the above chart.

 

10 year failure rate

72% for typical use of diaphragms

46% for perfect use of diaphragms

 

86% for typical use of condoms

18% for perfect use of condoms

 

If you want any decent chance of success over a ten year period, it looks like you need perfect use of condoms and a diaphragm together. 

 

What I love about the NY Times chart is how clear it makes it that unless the average couple uses a pretty much fool-proof method of contraception (sterilization, IUD, or a hormonal implant) they can expect a few unplanned pregnancies over their decades of fertility. A 90% success rate for one year looks good, but over a few decades, will lead to some unplanned babies.

 

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If you want any decent chance of success over a ten year period, it looks like you need perfect use of condoms and a diaphragm together. 

 

Condoms plus spermicide are 99.7% effective with perfect (correct and consistent) use. I wouldn't bother with a diaphragm if I was using both.

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I tried a diaphragm for a couple years. It's easy to use once you know how. My ob-gyn fitted me, removed it, told me how to insert/remove it, then had me practice on my own before he gave me the prescription. (He used lubricant for this vs spermicide, and no, he didn't stay during the practice. lol ) I might have liked it more but I had a problem with the spermicide. (**TMI Alert!**) It made me itch. Inside. Where you can't actually scratch. Ugh! I never got an infection or anything and the itch (best way to describe what it was) didn't last long after the diaphragm was removed. But still. A friend of mine used one for years and years without issue. It just didn't work for me.

 

Yes, do make sure you tolerate spermicide first! I tried the sponge once, and OMG!!!!!! I HURT! I had such a bad reaction to the spermicide, and was doubled over in pain. BUT...if you take it out before however many hours, it isn't effective. And i didn't want to get pregnant, so I just dealt with the pain for hours. Then gave the rest away. 

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Condoms plus spermicide are 99.7% effective with perfect (correct and consistent) use. I wouldn't bother with a diaphragm if I was using both.

Yeah, I always wondered about combos like that. Unfortunately, the chart only included data for single methods. When I needed to worry about such things, I always used combos like that, figuring they were less likely to both fail at the same time, although I never had any data on it.

 

Why isn't the data on combo methods more easily available?

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I love my Mirena IUD. I know you say that you don't want one, but I wish I had done it sooner.  Had mine inserted after DS3 was born.  I've had it six years, and we're going another year because my OB says it's approved for 7 in Europe and I'm in my late 40s.  Easiest, most fool proof birth control ever.

 

I hated the diaphragm....and quite frankly, it has high user error.  DS1 was conceived using one.  You have to use spermicidal cream with it.  There's also a cervical cap which is similar. 

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They need to hurry up and get Vasalgel studies going. https://www.parsemusfoundation.org/projects/vasalgel/

 

I really, really hope it works and even better if it is reversible. If they can make it reliably reversible I think there would be parents out there taking their teenage sons to get it.

 

The company's website also says they are working on a "clean sheets pill" that would let men orgasm without ejaculating to act as a contraceptive and cut down on STDs.

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From what I understand diaphrams aren't reccomended unless you use spermacide, they aren't reliable alone.  I've also had issues with spermacide being very uncomfortable, after I used it a few times.

 

I had pretty good results with NFP and condoms and would use that combo again if I needed to.

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Condoms plus spermicide are 99.7% effective with perfect (correct and consistent) use. I wouldn't bother with a diaphragm if I was using both.

That would be my recommendation as well.

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Thank you for all the replies. This has been helpful. I made an appointment. I want to try it out and have it as an option. Maybe I will hate it, but at least I can say I tried it. I made an appt at my m/w's office. They were about to close and the girl who made the appointment thought that I had to make the appointment with the doctor in the practice, as the midwives didn't do that. I have never met the doctor, who happens to be a man.

 

So as I am imagining how this visit is going to go, it's starting to weird me out that I have to see the male doctor. I haven't had a male obgyn in 11 years and while I don't consider myself overly prude about doctors and showing my lady bits, this is kind of weirding me out.

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So as I am imagining how this visit is going to go, it's starting to weird me out that I have to see the male doctor. I haven't had a male obgyn in 11 years and while I don't consider myself overly prude about doctors and showing my lady bits, this is kind of weirding me out.

 

Just remind yourself that they have seen it all before, probably thousands of times. I dress modestly for religious reasons, and I still prefer a male ob/gyn. They have always seemed gentler to me. YMMV. 

 

Of course, if you prefer a midwife, it doesn't hurt to ask again!

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