Jump to content

Menu

The Secret Shame of Middle Class Americans


chiguirre
 Share

Recommended Posts

The school I attended (University of Texas at Dallas) joked about being undefeated in football. They didn't have a football team. They did give out chess scholarships. Chess has the benefit that you're not going to injure yourself doing it, ending your 'career' prematurely, nor do you have to worry about brain damage from concussions.

 

UTD sounds like a cool place.  It reminds me of an old ad campaign to celebrate the 125th anniversary of UCSF, which is only grad schools in health sciences:  UCSF: 125 years and still not sports.  The videos showed celebrated scientists and Nobel prizewinners wearing pads and helmets and throwing footballs, badly.  

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

My oldest two are competitive swimmers, but we are under zero illusions about lots of money for scholarships. At best, oldest daughter may get about $5k a year at one school. At worst, it could make them a more attractive candidate for a competitive college.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I absolutely saw this with my sister and the money she spent on volleyball for her oldest dd. I would not doubt if over a course of 6-8 years leading up to high school graduation my sister spent 50k on club fees, travel, etc. I am not kidding either. And she did it n hopes of dd getting a full ride. Which didn't happen. The dd got some scholarships, but only stayed for a year and came home to go to a different local college to be a nurse. My sister has seen the error of her ways and pulled her two younger dds out of a similar cheer program.

Though I don't much care about sports, I don't really have anything against them either. If they enjoy it and are having a good time and they can afford it - great. It's the pressure that it's not worth it if it doesn't result in big money later that bothers me. And frankly, I think it kills a lot of the joy of it for the kids when they are older too.

 

ETA: and the craving by the parents for public praise unnerves me too. I've seen parents really push their kid to make sure they get camera time and such. Me? If I can do an Internet search and have absolutely nothing show up for my kids image or name, I'm a happy mama. I'm not interested in my kids becoming famous.

Edited by Murphy101
  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Right now I'm living in "Expected Family Contribution" hell. How do they even get that number? They do not care if you live in a HCOL area at all. We've made it through year one of college without debt, but I don't think we can hold out all four years.

Yeah, what's that about? More than 20% of our income? No way.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Crazy, unrealistic, ridiculous! The EFC is impossible. To meet that we would have to both work full time and provide our other kids with solely public schooled, no extracurriculars educations. when it comes to FAFSA it really doesn't pay to have been financially responsible, that just ups your EFC.

 

We could, of course, take out all the additional "parent loans" suggested and offered through the university's financial aid department. Just sign right here, mom & dad, for another $10K...

Edited by Seasider
  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

She should take up diving, as well.  Female recruits for that combination are harder for colleges to come by.  :)

My oldest two are competitive swimmers, but we are under zero illusions about lots of money for scholarships. At best, oldest daughter may get about $5k a year at one school. At worst, it could make them a more attractive candidate for a competitive college.

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

How is it that so many families manage $10,000 per year for daycare but can't manage that much for college? Are they in different groups of people?

 

There aren't too many kids who go straight from daycare to college...

 

In the meantime, those funds get allocated elsewhere - not always for college funds.

 

Our EFC is also between 1/3rd and 1/2 our income.  Fortunately, since we live in a lower COL area and are used to living on bare minimums (to augment our travel fund), we can swing it as long as we stop contributing to our retirement during the college years.  Naturally, our travel has had to revert back to super cheap options for the most part.  We're ok with that.

 

I look forward to the nice bonus (raise) we'll get once college (and perhaps med school) bills are finished!  Of course, I also plan to donate more to all three boys' colleges since all three got nice aid from them allowing it to be affordable and our kids have loved their experiences.  Our donations won't be the same as tuition, but it ought to help other students in the future, while still giving us a raise.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

How is it that so many families manage $10,000 per year for daycare but can't manage that much for college? Are they in different groups of people?

Daycare is no where near that cost here. That said, I homeschooled so never had a daycare bill but with three boys three and a half and under, had I remained as a teacher for $23,000 a year gross at the Lutheran school obviously a $30,000 daycare bill would not have een a tenable situation.

 

I do know of many families in which the mom went in hole to work but it was the only way to keep medical insurance. But that doesn't count when it comes to the calculation of EFC.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

And again, 30 year mortgages make sense in a lot of scenarios.  Also, if someone is planning to stay in a home for a long time, going with bigger and better can make a lot of sense as well.

 

Except life has a way of throwing curve balls.  You can "expect" to stay in a place a very long time and then something can happen, a death, an economic crash, or a job loss, and you are in a world of hurt if your expenses were really high.

 

If you get lucky, it can work out great, but it didn't work out great for a large number of people in the last crash.  

 

 

Edited by TranquilMind
  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

How is it that so many families manage $10,000 per year for daycare but can't manage that much for college? Are they in different groups of people?

A lot of people plan and save for the daycare years prior to baby. Over the years of primary kids resources can get depleted.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...