They are lacking excitement, driving me crazy

[Janeway]

I know they are normal....but sheesh!

 

We got a book today. I am jumping with joy! I had watched the tracking and knew it was coming today. When it came I saw the package at the front door and right away told the kids. I suggested they open it, they were busy with their own things. I then opened it and tried to tell them "hey, look at this!" and "this is so cool!" I am genuinely excited. They aren't. They are just sort of..yeah, a new book. It is the biology book. 

 

I wonder if the internet kills their drive. Or are kids just like this? They seem very concerned with their computer time, but not at all concerned with anything like new books or anything else. I even got an email that Codeacademy is going to have an SQL class now and I got excited even though I am not the one interested in computer programming. The oldest says he wants to major in it. But, yet, ho hum. They are not concerned. <sigh>

 

I cannot even inspire excitement with a new movie. Ok, the one was jumping with joy over the new Star Wars movie. But other than that, it is all just, blah blah. They are not saying blah blah. But I do wish I had someone to gush over the new book with me.

Edited April 14, 2016 by Janeway

[Eagle]

I'll be excited with you. Yay!!! New book!! Which biology book did you get?

[Peaceful Isle]

I love getting new school books! My kids are less than thrilled. Lol

 

It's okay, they are kids. My kids get excited when I tell them we are having a field trip day, going to the beach, or laying around the house having literature day with chocolate chip cookies. ;)

 

Never do school books excite them.

Edited April 14, 2016 by Peacefulisle

[Janeway]

I'll be excited with you. Yay!!! New book!! Which biology book did you get?

Science Shepherd. LOL..my husband is laughing at me and saying "gee, can't imagine why they are not as excited as you." I finally managed to pin down the oldest and show him through the book and all the exciting things we will learn. He just kept smiling at me and saying "cool" and "very cool" and so on. I asked him if he was humoring me and he smiled even bigger and said "not at all." LOL Oh well, I will take being humored over being ignored.

[mom2samlibby]

LOL!!!  They are kids.  They are probably not going to get excited over a new school book.  

 

I get excited over them too until it comes time to implement them.   :lol:

[regentrude]

I only once had my kids jump with joy over a school book. That was when the next volume of AoPS came in the mail.

I find that an unrealistic expectation.

 

Now books, real books, they get excited about. And plenty of other stuff.

Edited April 14, 2016 by regentrude

[Tranquility7]

I think it is normal for kids to not be excited over new school books. However, I have two thoughts -

 

1) timing. You showed them the book when they were "busy with their own things". I'd say that is probably not a good time to expect excitement. I assume you put thought into the book you selected, thinking that they will enjoy it. What you could do is receive the book, look through it and be excited on your own, and then put it on the shelf. Then, pick a time when your DS is either struggling with slugging through the last chapters of his current book, or talking about/watching something related to the new book, and say something like, "Oh, I forgot, I have a new book to show you!" and show him the new book. That way maybe he would like the distraction from his current work that he is not enjoying, and/or be interested because he has a current (even if fleeting) interest in the subject matter.

 

2) manners. Adults often show interest in things not because they are *genuinely* and *independently* interested in something, but because someone else is excited about it and telling them about it, and it would be completely rude to just act disinterested. Kids often get away with acting disinterested, especially when it comes to school, but it really is rude. I ask my kids how they would feel if they were excitedly telling Grandma about their gymnastics class (or whatever) and she rolled her eyes and got ornery and rude. Would it disappoint them? Would it bring them down? Would it drain some of their energy? Would it discourage them? Of course it would. And Grandma knows that. And even though Grandma is not necessarily interested in every detail of their gymnastics class, she is excited because they are excited. She is showing love to them by caring about what they care about, and by reflecting their positive energy back to them.

 

All of this to say - next time you are about to show your DC a new book (or whatever), I'd have a quick heart-to-heart with them and just say that you are excited about something and you want to show it to them, and you know they aren't going to be as excited as you are, but could they muster up some excitement or at least interest anyway - not because they love biology or whatever, but because they love you? Or as I say to my kids - "Be an energy giver, not an energy taker."

 

Science Shepherd. LOL..my husband is laughing at me and saying "gee, can't imagine why they are not as excited as you." I finally managed to pin down the oldest and show him through the book and all the exciting things we will learn. He just kept smiling at me and saying "cool" and "very cool" and so on. I asked him if he was humoring me and he smiled even bigger and said "not at all." LOL Oh well, I will take being humored over being ignored.

 

See, honestly, I think this is perfect! He was humoring you because he loves you. He was humoring you in that amusing 14 yr old DS way that shows he is trying to be polite and even trying to be actually interested. I would totally praise him and thank him for this if I were you! :D

[Garga]

BTDT. Today.

 

Today I was walking past the rather large bookcase with all the kid books that I've bought for my guys. I have spent countless happy hours at huge library sales looking at every single one of the 500,000 kids books for sale, lovingly picking out books for the boys to read.

 

But they don't like reading. Oh, the oldest says he does, but he reads a book every 6 months on his own. Sure, he reads when I prompt him to for school and he's ok with it, but he won't pick up a book on his own. I practically live to read. It's just what I do. It defines me.

 

I picked one of the books off the bookcase and stared at it and mourned that it will never be loved. Le sigh.

 

I've tried to explain it to the boys. I tell them, "The library is like walking into the Lego store and being told you can have any set that you want to play with for months and months and give it back when you're done." They understand that I love books, but they don't feel the love for themselves. I would adore being able to share that love with them.

 

And, yeah, as another poster said, you have to have better timing to show them stuff like that. I've gotten pretty good at it, but poor DH tries to pull them away from something they're completely engrossed in to show them something else and wonders why they don't make the switch easily and engage with him. I tell him over and over, "Timing!"

Edited April 14, 2016 by Garga

[Pen]

I've only once had my son be really excited about a school book.  I try to be excited for myself in private, and only expect him to do his school work, not to love it. The reality is that for him, school work is not something he adores.

[HS Mom in NC]

Mine never got excited about school books.

I don't think I've ever jumped up and down over anything in my life.  My husband and I are not people who get really excited about much.  We like things and sometimes we really like them but gushing and jumping isn't something we're temperamentally inclined to do.  Neither is wanting someone else to be excited about something we care about.  The norm is more like a cheerful, "That's cool." or "That's interesting, tell me more about that." or something kind of toned down.  

[Arcadia]

The reality is that for him, school work is not something he adores.

If the amazon box contains a science kit or science lab supplies, my kids will be the ones tearing the box apart to check out the contents.

 

DS10 wants me to order some dissection kits. We'll go buy "dissection specimens" from the chinese supermarkets instead since they have live seafood.

 

For books my kids did like the K12 literature books which they get when they were in the online public charter, and the AoPS books they wanted. They pick their school books, I just pay.

[zarabellesmom]

Beast Academy is the only school book that my daughter has ever been excited about. And even that was pretty low key. She and my husband are much like Homeschool Mom in AZ. Their version of excitement just isn't the same as mine and my youngest's. My oldest daughter loves books so that might generate enough excitement for an "Is that the box with my book in it? Mind if I open it? Thanks mom."

[SparklyUnicorn]

Mine react in a similar way generally.

 

 

[OlgaLA]

I don't think my kids have ever been excited about anything educational. DS did ask to order BA4 early, but he didn't act particularly excited when they arrived, They do get excited over not-for-school books, and will occasionally fight over them, but I just want to see a sparkle of excitement over something actually educational. I guess I ask too much.

[Pen]

If the amazon box contains a science kit or science lab supplies, my kids will be the ones tearing the box apart to check out the contents.

 

DS10 wants me to order some dissection kits. We'll go buy "dissection specimens" from the chinese supermarkets instead since they have live seafood.

 

For books my kids did like the K12 literature books which they get when they were in the online public charter, and the AoPS books they wanted. They pick their school books, I just pay.

 

Mine also gets excited by science kits and also some literature--but I almost never call that "school."  Anything he is happy to have and do becomes sort of unschool.  And then I get to be surprised by how much he has actually gotten done, since I only focus on what he does not like and do willingly.

 

I wish math were part of that, though  AoPS books have been his favorite of books for math, but it is favorite in sense of least disliked, not I don't think like your sons or Gil's who really love their math as I understand it.

[Arcadia]

Mine also gets excited by science kits and also some literature--but I almost never call that "school." Anything he is happy to have and do becomes sort of unschool. And then I get to be surprised by how much he has actually gotten done, since I only focus on what he does not like and do willingly.

As a teacher role, the focus tends to be on weak or unwilling areas. As a parent, the focus can be on what our kids learned and achieved whether it is self taught or under guidance.

 

Take your son's ice skating, his music, those are still in the realm of school. If your son like star gazing, or bird watching or analyzing water samples from creeks/ponds that is also school.

 

ETA:

You might also want to think like a guidance counselor and outline what are the school stuff you can highlight even if your son schooled those. After looking at private high school enrollment forms, sometimes it feels like marketing class homework.

Edited April 15, 2016 by Arcadia

[daijobu]

What about mail even?  I used to get excited about anything addressed to me, even if it was a catalog.  My kids can't even be bothered to open an envelope.  Jeepers.  I figure they get so many messages each day already, that something arriving in a mailbox is not a big deal anymore.  

[stutterfish]

I frequently ask my kids to humor me. They're getting pretty good at it.

 

They're teens. I totally understand why they aren't excited about the same things as me. They really aren't going to get excited about a new ball of sock wool I just bought and I'm not exactly jumping for joy when some guitarist from X band that I haven't heard of has just posted on his blog about their new album. I think humoring each other is a good skill to learn. Some nodding and 'uh-huh' is a bare minimum requirement in our house. :)

[SanDiegoMom]

The excitement they show me when I tell them excitedly about a book that I just "KNOW you'll LOVE" is about the same level of excitement I give them when they tell me about their new minecraft update.  Now I am attempting to learn about the things they love, and maybe my modelling that behavior will cause them to return the favor:-)