How do you decide when to let a pet die?

[klmama]

One of our cats is quite old and has kidney disease. We could shell out several hundred dollars to keep her going for awhile longer with an IV for several days at the vet, but she'd still have kidney disease, she'd still be very old, she still would need special food and sub-cutaneous fluids every day or two, and she could still go downhill again at any time. The costs and emotional stress of keeping her alive will never end. However, I'm concerned it will mess up my dc for an important event that is coming up if the cat dies right beforehand, which is likely if we do nothing. Yet, if it isn't this event, it will be another one. There isn't a good time for the cat to die, KWIM? What would you do? How do you decide these things?

 

ETA: I'm not against having her put down, but the decision about that is part of this bigger decision.

Edited September 30, 2008 by klmama

[HollyDay]

When my beloved dog was 17, she was really starting to have some health issues. Now, my oldest child was only 9 at the time, so you must understand this dog had been with me longer than my children! I told the vet I could not make the call. He would have to tell me what to do. I just couldnt. He was so kind and set a care plan that would keep her going, not cost an arm and a leg, and also keep her relatively comfortable. She finally died of natural causes one glorious spring day.

 

So, I would highly suggest having a long, realistic chat with your vet.

[hsmamainva]

When their quality of life suffers and / or they're in pain.

 

We had to put our shepherd-mix down several years ago. He was almost 14 and, while he had the generic aches and pains for years, it wasn't until he was having trouble walking that we decided that it was time. And we took him in on a 'good day' for him, meaning that he was able to walk into the vet's office under his own power.

 

My hubby and I went together and bawled. :crying: But, after it was over, we both commented that it was the first time in many months that his facial expression was free of pain (he was really having a hard time there, at the end) and we knew that we did the right thing.

 

And...we went to the animal shelter and adopted a puppy not too long after that. Our personal feeling was that we would rather adopt another dog that is going to be put to death in a matter of days if it doesn't find a home (our shelter is very crowded here, all the time) than to spend a great deal of money prolonging the inevitable for an older pet who has had a good, long, wonderful life.

 

I hope that makes sense without sounding 'cold-hearted'?

[lovemyboys]

What would you do? How do you decide these things?

 

This is so hard.

 

One of our vets told us that if you're faced with this -- try to think of your pet's favorite 3 things in life. For ours it was walks, food and chasing things outside. When your pet can't do any of these, maybe it's time to start thinking about its quality of life.

 

When our pet was near the end, she had suffered for several months with things, but she managed to wander well away into some nearby woods on two different occasions. This was an amazing effort on her part, because she didn't get around very well. Dh and I took this as a sign -- her natural instinct -- what animals used to do when they were free to get away on their own.

 

We gave her extra attention and loving over that weekend and took her to the vet's the next week. We told dc that she was near the end and in a lot of pain, but we didn't take them with us to the vet's.

 

Good luck with your decision, it's not easy. :grouphug:

[ma23peas]

All about the quality of life..

 

We put down our 15.5 year old pet Sable last month...it's the first time I've had to make that decision..she got to the point where we had to carry her outside to use the bathroom..she was not eating and although she did not show she was in pain, she was sad..she never cried out in pain or whined but her eyes were soo tired and the joy had gone...

 

It took less than 4 seconds after they gave her the shot...it was ROUGH!!!

 

If she's not in pain and able to eat/move...let her live...if she requires something to keep walking/move...then put her down..soo sorry you're dealing with this.

 

Tara

[Lisa at Home]

And I have posted here about it several times, and received wonderful suggestions and support.

 

First, :grouphug: I know how hard it is!!!:(

 

My 17 1/2 year old cat had what appeared to me to be a simple UTI...just a few drops of blood one day. I took her to the vet and expected a simple antibiotic, but got much more than I bargained for.

 

If I had known everything that was going on all at once, I might have been more inclined to feel hopeless, and that I couldn't afford it, and that maybe we should consider putting her down. But, that's not how it happened. I got one small bit of bad news every two days for about two weeks.

 

Since I had already started the process of trying to make her well, I didn't feel right about interrupting the process to put her down, as she was perking up a whole lot after about a week.

 

Anyway, kitty now gets a thyroid pill twice a day, and does have kidney issues and is getting subcutaneous fluids twice a week. Giving the fluids is not as bad as I thought, but she still doesn't like it, of course. She will have to have continued bloodwork.

 

The vet would like her to take an antioxidant capsule, but I'm not going to do that. She hates it too much. The vet also would like her to be on a special food, which I won't do. The cat will not eat the same thing for more that 2 days, so it would be futile to try. Kitty is mostly getting homemade human grade food, and baby food. I will just be happy if she eats anything.

 

My point is, is that after all this started, I questioned whether I made the right decision as to whether to spend the time and money on such an old cat, or whether it would have been in her best interest to have her put to sleep peacefully.

 

Now that I am past the really hard parts, I'm glad I tried. If she hadn't made it, I would know that I did everything that I could, and be guilt free and satisfied. But you know what? She is totally back to her old self, I am happy to say!

 

I think you need to consider whether you're up for the challenge of all the work it may take to keep kitty going, and whether it's even financially feasible. I think it might be hard on you to start bringing kitty back just for the short term sake of your children, and then putting her down.

 

I believe you would be within reasonable bounds if you felt that she needs to be put down, but I also want you to know that kitty really might make a rebound and be happy and content for a while longer, however long or short that may be.

 

I hope maybe you can glean something, anything, from my experience and ramblings. I don't envy your being in the decision making seat right now. Nope, not at all. It's hard and there's just no denying that.

 

:grouphug: again,

 

~Lisa

[TravelingChris]

We may be having to do something about our 16 Siamese cat that is slowly dieing of what both or vet and we think is cancer (though I see it as the old term of consumption since he has lost more than 1/2 his weight). We knew he had a heart condition and thought he would die from that. He was diagnosed with that last summer. His heart is still going pretty well though and it isn't his kidney. liver or thyroid. Both his vet and I think he has some undiagnosed cancer and with his heart problem and age, we didn't want to do more invasive or unproductive tests. He may very well have bone cancer but there isn't anythin we could do even if we wanted to. He is now less than seven pounds and still loosing weight since he barely eats. My husband thinks he has less than a month. I am observing him. One day, two weeks ago, I thought it was almost time since he ate less than normal (which is barely anything) and was hardly moving. Bt then he rallied and here we are. I have made the command decision that we will not drag him in a car over a thousnad miles to our next home in the condition he is in. That means he is either ded on his own by early December or we will put him down. He doesn't like moving and we just think that in his condition (if he makes it which I doubt) putting that stress and fear into his last few days is completely unjustifiednot including the fact that at this point he finds our Florida house at 78 degrees to be too cold.

[Susan in TN]

I would do it sooner than later. When I was a teenager, my dad brought our family dog to the vet when she simply couldn't function on her own. Her heart was weak and we had to carry her in and out of the house, and she couldn't make it up the stairs. She seemed to be in pain or at least very uncomfortable most of the time.

 

IMO, it may be more painful for your kids to see their cat continue to live in such difficult circumstances. If you have at least a week or a few days before the event, take care of it first thing tomorrow morning. If they have a good couple of days to grieve, by the third day they should be feeling at least a little better (if they are anything like my kids.) Let your kids give her a hug and kiss goodbye. Maybe have them write down favorite stories about her or draw pictures of her to help ease the pain.

[Stacy in NJ]

This is so difficult. We put our beloved 12 yo lab down this spring. She was in a lot of pain and was loosing control of her bowel movements.

 

For older pets, I'm just not in favor of alot of medical intervention. Putting monetary cost aside, usually we can only lengthen their lives for a short time with questionable quality.

 

In your situation I would do what's best for your cat regardless of the timing. Both you and your dc will feel better knowing that you did right by her.

[mom42terrificgirls]

This may sound tacky, but when we put my beloved dog Lucky down, I took the girls out window shopping. We actually window shopped and talked about Lucky the whole time we walked. I just felt that it was better than us sitting around an empty house, looking for her all day. We stayed gone most of the day until the three of us decided that we were "ready" to go home and face a Luckyless house. It really helped. I second the poster who said to have a good talk with your vet.

[klmama]

Thanks, everyone. Dh just told me to take her in for the IV. Bless his heart! He doesn't really care one way or the other, but he knows losing her will hurt the rest of us, so he said we should go ahead and try to help her. If she can live awhile longer and be more comfortable and happy, great. If not, we'll have tried.

 

Time for a good cry. I love that man!

[Soph the vet]

We have many clients with older cats in renal failure. We've taught them to do subQ fluids at home and feed the cats whatever they want! That is the economical way to go. Once a cat gets to the stage where they have uremic ulcers or anemia, the kidney failure is really end-stage and more drastic measures are needed to prolong kitty's life, KWIM? So if your kitty is eating and you are able to keep her hydrated you may have her around for quite awhile yet. If she is vomiting or has pale mucus membranes, you may have a cat already in end-stage renal failure.

Whenever you decide to put her down it will be hard. There is just no way around it. It is a merciful thing if she is suffering and you are the only one who can judge that living with her day in and day out. It is a hard but necessary lesson for dc about life and death no matter what else is going on in our lives at the time. I'm sorry you are dealing with this. I've found that kids are resilient and they will bounce back after kitty is gone. I would NOT recommend them going to the vet for a euthanasia unless they are well into middle school age.

Soph

[stephanie]

:grouphug: So sorry you're going through this. I did this with my chihuahua. She was 9,and had always been sickly, but she developed a collapsed trachea and needed a surgery that was not done very often. We were sent to a animal hospital in Houston since it was a specialized surgery to be evaluated. Dh and I felt that if she could live with quality to her life then we should do the surgery. On top of that she had a prolapsed rectum which required surgery as well. So it was very expensive, but the surgery was considered successful for about a year. She once again started having difficulty breathing so we took her in for a scope,and she had a collapse in another area of her trachea. She was so tired, and I was not going to put her through surgery again. My vet had encouraged me to consider putting her down,but I just wasn't there yet. She was then on breathing treatments to help settle everything down in her airway. One Saturday night she was having so much trouble breathing...she was suffering. At the time I was regretting not putting her down the day before because I didn't want her to have to suffer during her death. I also didn't want to go to the local pet er since they didn't know her or me, and I felt that would be difficult for both of us. So I prayed hard. I asked The Lord that if He could just give her a peaceful night sleep then the next day (Sunday) I would call my vet at home and ask him to meet us up there to put her down. God was so good...she fell asleep in my arms that night and ate a nice breakfast the next morn. So I called my vet and he met me up there. That was the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life up to this point. I felt such a loss in my life and it was so very difficult. However, I had a peace about it because I knew that we had done everything we could for her. We and the wonderful vets were able to try every procedure possible in keeping her well and comfortable. It was very hard on my dc as well, but a lesson that they had to learn. We all talk about her still and all the cute things she used to do. I just wanted to share this with you to know that this is a very difficult thing to do, but that our sweet animals depend on us to do what's right for them. Please keep us posted and lots of hugs are going out to you!