Hope for parents of late bloomers (academically speaking)

[Pamela H in Texas]

I wanted to share just because I know it gave me such hope and such when I read stories of late bloomers doing well.

 

My son, Tyler, is one of those late bloomer types. I was so worried so many times. Why would nothing STICK? Last year, he made considerable progress and I really could see it but I was still worried. When would he "catch up?" I mean, seriously, now he's a teenager!

 

But let me tell you that it DOES finally happen. Late last year, Tyler turned in a paper to his k12 teacher and she returned it with a grade of 98! His testing scores weren't great, but it was obvious he was doing SO much better.

 

But this fall.....My son is doing a full 8th grade curriculum (algebra, science, history, art, Spanish, English, etc) and doing BEAUTIFULLY. He is so CAPABLE. He's obviously reading better. His math is good. He joined the writing club this morning! Some beginning of the year testing came back and he was above average!

 

It is scary waiting til 7th or 8th grade for significant progress. I know. And I'm not saying you'll have to wait that long! But know that if it doesn't happen at 8 or 10. It may well still happen at 12 or 13.

 

I know I can't tell you not to stress. We ALL worry about our kids! But if you keep working at it, it eventually does click and stick.

[Rich with Kids]

Thank you for posting. My worry for my 12yo ds keeps me up at night sometimes. Some days I feel I may as well be teaching to a potted plant. :glare:

[Heather in the Kootenays]

I've noticed the same thing with my 13 yo ds. At times I've despaired - thinking he'd never learn anything. Now he's finally taken off. Now there are some rough edges - spelling etc but he's going to be OK. Actually he'll be better than OK. Last week, he wrote several pages on Why I Hate to Write - hilarious.

 

And Rich With Kids, some days I would have rather taught the potted plant. It wouldn't have been near as annoying.

 

And to all moms of 12 yo boys, :grouphug:

[Doran]

Our experience, with our youngest, is following a similar path. While I don't know that academics will ever be her strong suit, I can imagine, now, that at least it won't necessarily tear her down all her life.

 

Like your young man, our 11.5 year old daughter is starting to mature academically - finally! She is in public school this year and is managing to bring home a solid B average. While some small part of me is disappointed that she doesn't get the easy A's her sister barely works for, another part of me is thrilled to pieces that she's staying "above average" in all her subjects.

 

One of her two 6th grade teachers called me last week to report in. He started the conversation with, "We have to talk." My heart sank, for I just knew he was about to tell me something terrible. Instead, he had nothing but glowing remarks about her -- how much he enjoys her bubbly personality (some would call her boisterous), and her willingness to speak up in class. He also said he thinks by next semester she may be able to bring in A's. Wow. It is good for a concerned mother to hear that!

 

I'm so happy for you and your son.

[unsinkable]

Can those who had 13 year olds "bloom" tell when the blooming began? Beginning, middle or end of the year the child was 13?

 

My ds is a recent 13 y.o. and I haven't seen the bloom. I think it'll happen, just a bit anxious...

[hsmamainva]

Very encouraging!!!!

 

My 14yo son is definitely a late bloomer!!! He didn't learn to read at all until he was 8 -- not even so much as his name!

 

And I fretted over it constantly.

 

Now he's doing very well .. and his knowledge of history, politics, and current events puts me to shame!!

 

I'll join you in that :grouphug: for all moms of pre-teen & teenage boys!!! (Oh! And girls, too!)

[Elisabeth in IL]

Thanks for the encouragement. My soon to be 11 year old is slowly making progress and I do constantly see improvement but I'm hoping for a great big flower of knowledge soon.

[Chelle in MO]

I wanted to share just because I know it gave me such hope and such when I read stories of late bloomers doing well.

 

My son, Tyler, is one of those late bloomer types. I was so worried so many times. Why would nothing STICK? Last year, he made considerable progress and I really could see it but I was still worried. When would he "catch up?" I mean, seriously, now he's a teenager!

 

But let me tell you that it DOES finally happen. Late last year, Tyler turned in a paper to his k12 teacher and she returned it with a grade of 98! His testing scores weren't great, but it was obvious he was doing SO much better.

 

But this fall.....My son is doing a full 8th grade curriculum (algebra, science, history, art, Spanish, English, etc) and doing BEAUTIFULLY. He is so CAPABLE. He's obviously reading better. His math is good. He joined the writing club this morning! Some beginning of the year testing came back and he was above average!

 

It is scary waiting til 7th or 8th grade for significant progress. I know. And I'm not saying you'll have to wait that long! But know that if it doesn't happen at 8 or 10. It may well still happen at 12 or 13.

 

I know I can't tell you not to stress. We ALL worry about our kids! But if you keep working at it, it eventually does click and stick.

You are so sweet to take time to post this encouragement! I continually tell myself not to stress about the academics too early, but knowing how early is too early is the tricky part!

 

Now that I am a little ways down the road, I can see more clearly, you know? It's just that I have trouble staying the course with patience in the early days.

 

Chelle

 

Forgot to say that I have 4 boys--8th, 6th, 4th, and 1st.

Edited September 30, 2008 by Chelle in MO
Adding ages

[Heather in the Kootenays]

Mine was 13 in Feb and it was this fall that I noticed how much better he was.

[Elm in NJ]

Thanks for posting this. I need to hear this because I am very worried about my eldest.

[PollyOR]

Yes, thank you!

 

I have noticed a shift with my two oldest girls around 12. The oldest had a great vocabulary but stunk at math until she hit 12/13. She has taken several calculus courses in college.

 

My second oldest couldn't write two sentences without major tears when she was 11. At the age of 12 she decided to write a book! I'm still in shock that she is a good writer.

[periwinkle]

Can those who had 13 year olds "bloom" tell when the blooming began? Beginning, middle or end of the year the child was 13?

 

My ds is a recent 13 y.o. and I haven't seen the bloom. I think it'll happen, just a bit anxious...

 

My late bloomer didn't begin to bloom until he was 14:toetap05:

 

Just saying...you may have to wait a bit;)

[Robin Hood]

I have a late bloomer, too, and could always use the encouragement. I know of 3 kids who were not good in school and one was a down right trouble maker and problem for his parents. As soon as he entered college, he was the top of the class being used by the professor to teach and tutor other students. I love late bloomer stories. My late bloomer has all her info stored, she is brilliant, but not ready to shine.

[Peela]

Thanks for this, Pamela.

My ds12 is almost, perhaps, maybe, hopefully starting to bloom too. Although sometimes we fall in a hole, mostly, we don't argue much about school and his self esteem is much better. He reads really, really well. It's just those pesky writing skills....but I think he is getting there. He made the big leap in the last few months of being able to handwrite neatly, which I had virtually given up on, even though I still made him practice daily.

His testing came back recently- big improvement..except in writing. However, they test writing by getting them to write a well planned short fiction story, with good grammar etc- its just not what we do. Oh well.

[Melissa in Australia]

I have found my late bloomer is like one of those flowers that opens in slow stages, he has bloomed a little, reads really well, great at math and music, sits and tries to do his work, but won't write at all.:glare: I am hoping there is some blooming left, and he will all of a sudden start writing soon. just as he all of a sudden started reading books when he turned 13.

:001_smile:

[Camy-7 boybarians 1 lady]

This encourages me greatly! Thanks.

[jamnkats]

My 12yo is really blooming but it might be a shift to homeschooling from unschooling that did it as my 14yo is going backwards. I realized my (always advanced) 14yo just really needs to radically unschool but my 12yo really enjoys the structure of homeschooling. He learned to read at 10 (I would not have changed that for anything - I always tried to encourage him but he just was Not Ready and I think that structured homeschooling - reading instruction - would have been hurtful to him) but really never read for pleasure. He now will stay up to 2am reading books from Sonlight Core 5. He has been attacking formal mathematics (learned his timestables in less than a month with nothing but encouragement - no coercion - on my part) and has surpassed his 14yo brother in that arena. We are doing the Writer's Jungle approach to LA and both boys are really enjoying that. He is really just shining and blooming and it is lovely to see.

 

now I just really have to back off my 14yo and have faith that he'll find what he needs in his own time and manner. He keeps proving it to me - recognizing stuff I'm reading (whether about digestion or the war between China and Japan) that he's discovered in some other obscure manner. (last night he claimed that he knew about the 4 tongue taste sensations (bitter, sour, sweet, salty) from Runescape. :))