dancer67 Posted October 22, 2014 Share Posted October 22, 2014 My very best friends were married a few years ago. One has a biological daughter. Her wife does not have children .Tomorrow, her wife will be officially adopting her spouses biological child as her own. The daughter is 9 years old. Anyone know what the etiquette is for this? Do I get a gift? A card? I just found out yesterday that the adoption will be finalized tomorrow at the courthouse, so I didn't have time to order anything, I am very excited for the both of them, and for their daughter who has two wonderful, loving parents. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twolittleboys Posted October 22, 2014 Share Posted October 22, 2014 I have no idea what the etiquette is but a gift/card definitely couldn't hurt. I guess for a gift I would choose something they can do as a family (tickets for a visit to the zoo etc.) or at least something that has to do with family (a coupon to get family pictures taken?) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bettyandbob Posted October 22, 2014 Share Posted October 22, 2014 Would a good novel/read aloud (to read together as a family) work or a family game? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hornblower Posted October 22, 2014 Share Posted October 22, 2014 Card, flowers (cut or maybe a houseplant? An orchid?)I like the idea of a family board game too. Here are some good family games for that age child http://boardgamegeek.com/geeklist/56707/9-year-old-gamers-daughter-top-9-games Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoobie Posted October 22, 2014 Share Posted October 22, 2014 I agree with a family-centered gift (game? picture frame? GC to favorite restaurant?), but I wouldn't think one is necessary unless they're having a party to celebrate. Even then not *necessary* but I'd bring one to a party. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spryte Posted October 22, 2014 Share Posted October 22, 2014 Congratulations to the new family! We still celebrate our "familyversary." :) I like the family gift idea, along with a card. Or if you want to order something personalized, with all of their names - that would be worth the wait. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redsquirrel Posted October 22, 2014 Share Posted October 22, 2014 Because it is tomorrow maybe send some flowers and then something else later on? Or maybe just bring over some flowers and chocolates to share? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heatherwith4 Posted October 22, 2014 Share Posted October 22, 2014 I would give a card with a nice note written inside and a gift card for a family activity, like the movies or a restaurant. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted October 22, 2014 Share Posted October 22, 2014 I would send flowers and I would include the girl's name as well as both parents. Nice story! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted October 22, 2014 Share Posted October 22, 2014 I would definitely congratulate them, maybe send flowers. I probably wouldn't make a huuuuge deal over it, only because the reality of the family situation (other than legally) has not really changed. Speaking as an adoptive mom. I like to keep things low-key rather than send the message to my daughters that being adopted is a big deal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happi duck Posted October 22, 2014 Share Posted October 22, 2014 Yay! I think giving a family gift would be awesome...you've already been given some great ideas! I wanted to add: At the back of your 2014 calendar jot down this date and when you get your 2015 calendar mark the date and send a card. I like the term a pp used upthread: 'familyversary'! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dancer67 Posted October 22, 2014 Author Share Posted October 22, 2014 Love the name "Familyversary"!!!!!! Wow, these are a lot of great ideas!!!! Actually, they are having a get together at a family pizza place after the final adoption. So, I am thinking flowers and a card is a definite. (I will get two bouquets, one for the parents and one for the couple). I think I might want to do something personalized and give it them later. We are very close to them. My husband and I were both in the bridal party when they were married. My DH was a best man, for one friend. And I was a maid of honor for my other friend. They were married on the beach in OC, MD. Beautiful ceremony. It just boggles my mind that I have people "praying" for this little girl because she is being brought up in a gay household. WHAT??? Ok, her bio father wanted nothing to do with her. I am a Christian. But I believe in love. I don't think God would frown upon two people who love each other deeply, and love this child with all of their heart and soul. (But that is a whole other subject) Thank you so much ladies!!! :hurray: :hurray: :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunflowerlady Posted October 22, 2014 Share Posted October 22, 2014 Best wishes to your friends. I think a card and flowers is lovely. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomtoCandJ Posted October 22, 2014 Share Posted October 22, 2014 Congrats to them, I hope to see more of this (gay marriage and adoption) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Tick Posted October 22, 2014 Share Posted October 22, 2014 Flowers for the 9 yo dd too? My dd would be thrilled. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
violamama Posted October 22, 2014 Share Posted October 22, 2014 My 6 and 8 year olds are totally into Build a Bear right now. The options for animals/outfits range in age so I would think most 9 year olds could come up with something they like. Plus, it's neat because it creates an activity/experience rather than just being a static gift. We actually just discovered BAB because somebody gave us a gift card for our own adoption! A $25 gift card will buy just about any of the stuffed animals, or a basic stuffed animal and an outfit for it. $50 gives the kid LOTs of options. I bet experiential gifts would be much appreciated as they can go out and celebrate as a trio! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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