Kids claiming they are scared of certain books...

[AimeeM]

At what point do you take a "suck it up Buttercup" approach here?

Nine year old girl who claims that she is scared of every book I've pulled off the shelves for her mandatory reading time daily. Today she is scared of the Magic Treehouse book I gave her. I understand that some topics are more sensitive (we put away a book about the Holocaust - I get that), but part of me feels that she just doesn't want to read anything age appropriate - at this very moment she is reading one of my 4 year old's Can You See What I See? books, and those are the types of books (picture books) she usually grabs for. She CAN read age appropriate books.

 

If this is totally normal and I should let her lead on this, what are some ABSOLUTELY NOT SCARY AT ALL (no magic, no mystery, no paranormal, no fighting, no sadness) books for a 9 year old?

[ThatHomeschoolDad]

Great Books for Girls breaks suggestions down by age, category, etc., and gives notes about the content, and if anything might be scary.  We found it to be a great resource.  I also find that reading aloud is different, and DD will listen to material that might seem scary to read.

[Mom2TheTeam]

What about non-fiction books about science or animals?  My almost 8 year old son (8 on Saturday) is VERY sensitive.  And, on top of that, he is scared of coming across something he doesn't want to hear or read.  He strongly prefers reading non-fiction books about animals.  I know it isn't "the classics," but I think it is okay to let the be sensitive and avoid those things while they are still if they don't feel they can handle it.  My son sometimes finds Magic School Bus to be too intense.

 

The other option is to find a book, like one from the list pp mentioned, that you KNOW doesn't contain any upsetting content and require her to read it. 

 

And, one other thought would be to read whatever book you were wanting her to read aloud to her and have her point out the parts that she is uncomfortable with...while still requiring some non-fiction or totally innocent fiction. 

 

Just some thoughts.  I'll be paying attention to this thread because my son is the same.  He still prefers easy readers even though he can (and will with non-fiction) read at a higher level.  I handed him Owl at Home recently and he wouldn't read it because tear soup was gross.  I didn't pre-read it and didn't know that was there.  Honestly, I think tear soup is gross. I didn't make him read it.  It's below his reading level anyway.  LOL!! 

[Occasionally]

My DD9 is also pretty sensitive about what she reads, so I can sympathize. I have not pushed her into reading things she finds frightening, but it definitely is a springboard for discussion.

 

Don't forget that good picture books are written for the parent to read, not the child, so the language is more advanced that you'd expect. 

 

What sort of "age-appropriate" books has she enjoyed so far? Are books with animals as the main characters okay?

[Mom22ns]

My dd really liked the baby sitter club little sister books. They are on a similar level to Magic Tree House books. I think of them as first grade books because that is when she loved them, but they are probably more like second or third grade. There is absolutely NOTHING scary in them. 

[hunterhomeschool]

I wonder if she'd enjoy historical-fiction/auto-bigraphical stories like Laura Ingalls Wilder's Little House Series about family life in the previous century.  I very much enjoyed them at her age and the first few books of the series are fairly easy reading chapter books (easier, I think, than Magic Tree-house and the lot... and there is no magic or mystery really... the real magic is in the rich and wonderful story-telling and learning some great American history in the process.)  The reading content and vocabulary of these books grows through the series along with the reader who is reading them and they can also be enjoyed by the whole family as reading out loud too.

 

Perhaps find a channel with re-runs of the old Little House on the Prairie tv show with Melissa Gilbert as Laura to introduce the concept and get her excited about it and point out that  Laura wrote a whole series of books based on her life in the late 1800's/early 1900's.  Perhaps even entice her by giving both reading and history credit for her reading efforts.  She may just fall in love with reading this way and become an avid reader. (I certainly did!)  

[AimeeM]

She hasn't shown any interest in any age appropriate literature. When we go to the book store she wants drawing books.

I'm having a difficult time coming up with any book that doesn't have SOME sort of conflict - sad, scary, etc.

 

I'll check out a few Baby Sitter Club books. I loved those when I was younger! I seem to remember one or two were a bit sad, but I think I remember them well enough to filter through them.

 

 

[duckens]

Many good ideas here!

 

Stick with nonfiction, or let her pick the book.

 

Would it help to have her read it aloud to you?  She may be so busy reading that she forgets to be worried.  And you can discuss it as you go.

 

 

---------------------------------------------------------------

Dd6 is not usually sensitive but once in awhile she gets scared half-way through the movie.  We stop the movie, and I ask, "What do you THINK is going to happen?"  (No animosity or snarkiness; just a gentle question).  "What would you do if you were [character name]?  Would you run and hide?  Punch the monster in the nose?  Throw magic acorns at it?"  And we discuss it from there.  Most main characters are okay at the end of the story, and your dd should be reminded of this and comforted by this.

[AimeeM]

She won't pick anything, lol.

 

I will try having her read aloud to me. Thanks!

[hunterhomeschool]

If she likes horses, The Saddle Club series is a good one for girls of this age.  Maybe lead her in with a drawing horses book.

[hunterhomeschool]

My Ds 10 is also more artist than reader too.  We have trouble finding books he will read too, so far, all but the Diary of a Wimpy Kid books a total wash with him and "comic-like" readers like Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles...  I hate this because to me "that is not literature" and I personally find them very irritating and a bad example.  We read a lot out loud, many of them classics like the Swiss Family Robinson... but he has reading difficulties anyway and it is a tough subject for him.  It is slow going with some kids to get them to love reading and pushing too hard can turn them off completely.

[Spy Car]

Start with Moby Dick, after a few chapters of that she'll be happy to read anything else :D

 

Bill

[kirstenhill]

So, as an adult, when a book or movie has too much tension for me, I will look up the ending or read the last chapter to find out how it ends. I find I can enjoy the book/movie so much more if I know things will resolve happily...or I know to prepare myself for a less than happy ending. I've never tried this with a kid, but maybe it would help if you really want her to work on reading more fiction?

[g1234]

I like these comments from all the pps. This is such an interesting topic!

 

In August I posted a similar question and got some really thought-provoking ideas that my daughter and I are still working with. They were very helpful to me for moving my thinking forward and getting some useful ideas to play around with. I am not sure how similar your situation is, but in case it is useful, here's the thread:

 

http://forums.welltrainedmind.com/topic/485407-6th-grader-incredibly-sensitive-to-sad-scary-or-suspenseful-literature-what-to-do/

[maize]

Start with Moby Dick, after a few chapters of that she'll be happy to read anything else :D

 

Bill

I like Bill's approachðŸ˜

 

OK, maybe not Moby Dick, but how about pulling two books off the shelf, one a nice friendly sort of book at her level and one a much thicker book with smaller print (but still appropriate in case she chooses it) and tell her she has to choose one or the other and read at least a chapter a day. Bet the friendlier book will seem less scary...

[sleeplessnights]

My oldest was/is the same way.  He gets freaked out when the books are thicker than a picture book, though he can read at a really high level.  For years his standard was that he didn't like it if he couldn't finish it in one sitting.  Oh, and he liked lots of pictures.

 

He's not totally cured, but some things that seemed to "push" him over the hump were:

1. Read aloud longer books over the period of a couple weeks.  I think this helped him realize that longer stories are more exciting and can hold his interest longer than an hour or two.

 

2. Listening to audiobooks on topics he loves.  I knew that he'd love Percy Jackson, but he wouldn't go near the books with a 10-foot pole.  I got the first two on CD from the library.  Once he was hooked, he picked up and read through the next three no problem.

 

3. Letting him read picture books with higher reading levels.  I was concerned that his vocabulary wouldn't be challenged reading lower level books.  Picture books like those written by Bill Peet have great vocabulary and nice pictures.

 

4. Buddy Reading his required reading.  This seemed to break down the defensive walls by making it a team effort.  When we read the books together out loud, I could see if he comprehended the story, pronounced the words correctly, and picked up some new vocabulary.  I think he liked the attention too!

 

5. I gave him 30 minutes of free reading time after the other kids went to bed.  He thought it was cool to stay up late.  I let him read whatever he wanted during this time.  I was attempting to make reading fun.

 

Like I said, he's much better, but he still would rather run outside and play than read a book any day...

[ThatHomeschoolDad]

Start with Moby Dick, after a few chapters of that she'll be happy to read anything else :D

 

Bill

 

Well, as long as we're exploring sadistic methodology, why not read the first two sentences of Finnegans Wake?

 

 

riverrun, past Eve and Adam’s, from swerve of shore to bend of bay, brings us by a commodius vicus of recirculation back to Howth Castle and Environs.

Sir Tristram, violer d’amores, fr’over the short sea, had passen-core rearrived from North Armorica on this side the scraggy isthmus of Europe Minor to wielderfight his penisolate war: nor had topsawyer’s rocks by the stream Oconee exaggerated themselse to Laurens County’s gorgios while they went doublin their mumper all the time: nor avoice from afire bellowsed mishe mishe to tauftauf thuartpeatrick not yet, though venissoon after, had a kidscad buttended a bland old isaac: not yet, though all’s fair in vanessy, were sosie sesthers wroth with twone nathandjoe. Rot a peck of pa’s malt had Jhem or Shen brewed by arclight and rory end to the regginbrow was to be seen ringsome on the aquaface.

 

Yeah, ah......no.    :banghead: 

[kiana]

Well, as long as we're exploring sadistic methodology, why not read the first two sentences of Finnegans Wake?

 

 

riverrun, past Eve and Adam’s, from swerve of shore to bend of bay, brings us by a commodius vicus of recirculation back to Howth Castle and Environs.

Sir Tristram, violer d’amores, fr’over the short sea, had passen-core rearrived from North Armorica on this side the scraggy isthmus of Europe Minor to wielderfight his penisolate war: nor had topsawyer’s rocks by the stream Oconee exaggerated themselse to Laurens County’s gorgios while they went doublin their mumper all the time: nor avoice from afire bellowsed mishe mishe to tauftauf thuartpeatrick not yet, though venissoon after, had a kidscad buttended a bland old isaac: not yet, though all’s fair in vanessy, were sosie sesthers wroth with twone nathandjoe. Rot a peck of pa’s malt had Jhem or Shen brewed by arclight and rory end to the regginbrow was to be seen ringsome on the aquaface.

 

Yeah, ah......no.    :banghead: 

 

lol wut?

 

I knew there was a reason I'd never even tried to read this book.

[kiana]

To the OP: What is she claiming that she's afraid of in the magic treehouse book?

[Splash]

Two of my kids went through this and here is what worked for them.

DS, I knew he'd love Despereaux but I couldn't convince him, too hard, too overwhelming. I found book in large print at library and gave it to him and told him he had to read two chapters, then if he didn't like it he could give it back. He read whole book and loved it. I learned for him the font, print size, color of pages and ink, etc all impacted him and his perception of the book. I found large print versions or used kindle to adjust the print size to help us through this time. He didn't like scary books either or ones where people die. I had to find happy, funny, exciting books for him and pre-read just about everything so I could prepare him.

 

DD loves Geronimo Stilton books. Again she has some vision challenges and these books have large print, aren't scary, visually appealing and not too many words on the page. She also doesn't like scary or sad books and prefers nonfiction books. Now at 12 is the first year she's read any novels the whole way through and enjoyed them other than the Geronimo Stilton books. She started reading at 3 and reads at above high school level now just didn't like fiction at all spent most of her time reading science and anatomy books. Kindle is helpful for her as well since we can adjust so many aspects of the format and print. We also did a round of vision therapy for convergence issues.

 

Thing I like about kindle is kids don't get overwhelmed by length or size of the book. They just tackle one page at a time.

[Spy Car]

:lol:

 

I nearly spit out my coffee.

My son happens to like Moby Dick...but you know Apples, Trees, and all that.

 

Speaking of Apples and Trees (:D) he also loved Genesis, and we're currently plowing through Exodus (which was a boon given that he drew "the Desert locust" as his insect for the 4th Grade report, which gave him plenty to talk about, plagues and all that). Bible literacy can come in handy.

 

Bill

[Hunter]

After going through a phase of being overly sensitive to literature and media, because of my PTSD, I now have a LOT more compassion and understanding for sensitive kids. I used to have a "suck it up" attitude, but I have learned that "sucking it up" can just make things worse.

 

Sometimes sensitivities and mental health issues do not appear to be logical, justifiable or valid, but that doesn't make the go away.

 

I really don't have any book suggestions. Sorry. Good luck.

[DianeW88]

My son happens to like Moby Dick...but you know Apples, Trees, and all that.

 

Speaking of Apples and Trees ( :D) he also loved Genesis, and we're currently plowing through Exodus (which was a boon given that he drew "the Desert locust" as his insect for the 4th Grade report, which gave him plenty to talk about, plagues and all that). Bible literacy can come in handy.

 

Bill

 

He could follow that up with a report on the "Mormon Cricket". ;)

[Spy Car]

He could follow that up with a report on the "Mormon Cricket". ;)

Cool. Did Mormons eat these? One of my favorite parts of dear son's report was the section on locust cuisine :D

 

Did you know North America had a "locust" species (the Rocky Mountain locust) that suddenly went extinct in the late nineteenth century? I've read pioneers dreaded their swarms as almost being "biblical." Then suddenly, they vanished. Weird.

 

Bill

 

ETA: Anyway, we've move on to the Inuit report.

[DianeW88]

Cool. Did Mormons eat these? One of my favorite parts of dear son's report was the section on locust cuisine :D

 

Did you know North America had a "locust" species (the Rocky Mountain locust) that suddenly went extinct in the late nineteenth century? I've read pioneers dreaded their swarms as almost being "biblical." Then suddenly, they vanished. Weird.

 

Bill

 

Nope, we didn't eat them...they ate the crops.  LOL  Fortunately, Salt Lake had an equally large, equally annoying, sea gull population that made short work of most of them.  The crickets are now gone (thanks to the miracle of modern pesticides), but the sea gulls remain...protected under the designation of being the "state bird"...all due to their gluttony and bullimic tendency to chew up, then puke up, the dreaded cricket, and go stuff themselves with more.  Rinse and repeat.  Save the pioneers food supply and get an eternally protected status.  Which they're awfully smug about.

 

Nowadays the seagulls survive by stalking fast food parking lots and community swimming pools in the summer, surviving on a diet of french fries, churros and nachos.

 

They are aggressive little stinkers and as big as cocker spaniels.  My kids have had churros taken right out of their hands, and a hot dog snatched from a briefly unattended plate at the pool.  Stupid birds.

[Spy Car]

Nope, we didn't eat them...they ate the crops.  LOL  Fortunately, Salt Lake had an equally large, equally annoying, sea gull population that made short work of most of them.  The crickets are now gone (thanks to the miracle of modern pesticides), but the sea gulls remain...protected under the designation of being the "state bird"...all due to their gluttony and bullimic tendency to chew up, then puke up, the dreaded cricket, and go stuff themselves with more.  Rinse and repeat.  Save the pioneers food supply and get an eternally protected status.  Which they're awfully smug about.

 

Nowadays the seagulls survive by stalking fast food parking lots and community swimming pools in the summer, surviving on a diet of french fries, churros and nachos.

 

They are aggressive little stinkers and as big as cocker spaniels.  My kids have had churros taken right out of their hands, and a hot dog snatched from a briefly unattended plate at the pool.  Stupid birds.

I had fried crickets in a little restaurant that specialized in such things down in Mexico City a couple of decades back, and I can tell you they're not bad :D

 

We've got that "rats with wings" type seagulls too. Cheeky monkeys!

 

Bill (who's forgotten the theme of the thread :p)

[AimeeM]

After going through a phase of being overly sensitive to literature and media, because of my PTSD, I now have a LOT more compassion and understanding for sensitive kids. I used to have a "suck it up" attitude, but I have learned that "sucking it up" can just make things worse.

 

Sometimes sensitivities and mental health issues do not appear to be logical, justifiable or valid, but that doesn't make the go away.

 

I really don't have any book suggestions. Sorry. Good luck.

 

Thing is - I can't seem to come up with much that doesn't have SOME kind of conflict (a bit of scare, or a bit of mystery, or a bit of sadness, or a bit of conflict - those are things that make up the plot of MOST books... even children's books).

 

Even the Little House books have some conflict - people hungry, people hurt, people dying, Laura is whipped in the first one, etc.

[Aurelia]

The Milly-Molly-Mandy Storybook is VERY gentle. It's pretty boring to adult senses, but there's really nothing scary or sad. Raggedy Ann Stories is gentle, but there might be some minor conflict.

[Farrar]

The sappiest book series I know that's currently in vogue is Toys Go Out.  I guess there's sort of sadness...  if you find a rubber ball having an existential crisis sad.  Really, nothing more dramatic than a toy being stuck in a bag briefly happens.  It's MTH level, more or less.  We listened to the audiobook of it when my kids were 7 and I thought, gee, this is cute, but we're too old for this.  So it might be what you're looking for. ;)

 

As for unusual foods, I've walked through the Beijing night market and I don't really care to think too hard about all the "edible" things I saw there.

[Erica in OR]

Okay, not being helpful to the OP here, but is anyone else thinking of the Friends episode where Joey sticks his copy of "The Shining" in the freezer when it gets too scary, then Rachel suggests he put "Little Women" in there too when it makes him too sad?

 

Erica in OR

[Elisabet1]

My daughter, who is 17 yrs old, did this!!! Seriously! I wish I had good advice for you. Best I can say is use Bookadventure and make her earn points to do things. It took until after 11 yrs old. I had to take away everything from TV to computer to get my daughter to read a book. She got to pick the books. But she claimed every single book was bad. I even took her to the library and she said the same thing. I sat there and watch her tell the librarian "I only want  book about kids on a deserted island where....." and gave her an entire story line. It was awful. She did get over it eventually. I know I had to come down on her and take every single thing away leaving her so incredibly bored that she gave in and read.

[Hunter]

Is she doing the same thing with movies? If it's a general sensitivity thing, then you should see a similar reaction to movies, as she is claiming for the books.