The China dishes.

[Guest]

For those who say sell it - it's not a particularly valuable or rare set. It's Gorham Regalia Court Teal. It was one of the least expensive patterns when it came out and there are pages and pages of pieces on Ebay for less than $10 (though some pieces are priced higher). This does lead to the possibility that I could complete the set pretty easily, but...meh. I just don't want china dishes. I've contemplated doing that, thinking if I had a full set for guests, we could use it, but then we're back to the dishwashing thing again. The china is pretty, but it is equal in my eyes to the attractive Correll that I bought and the Correll is absent of all concern and worry.

 

I think I'm going to give it away. Maybe I'll try Freecycle. I'll keep grandma's gift, though, because I care about it and it's a sweet memory for me.

[fraidycat]

Does anybody else get heart palpitations at all of the advice to "save it for your daughter".

 

My advice DO NOT save it for your daughter(s). Do not perpetuate the cycle of *too much stuff* that she has to decide (and feel guilty or not) whether she should keep it or get rid of it based on her feelings of sentimentality.

 

Use it or lose it.

 

You have 24 hours to evacuate - what are you going to take with you? The rest.... can stay or go. Stay has requirements: It needs to be useful or LOVED, not "it was a gift so I have to keep it".

 

There's my .02 for the day.

[Orthodox6]

Would you believe...she also gave me the christening gown? :lol: It's true, but I have to laugh at the absurdity of it all!

 

 

At the baptism of our eldest son (about to turn 27), he wore the baptismal gown of his great-grandfather (who was born in 1894). We cherish this garment, and shall give our son the option (up to him and his wife, of course) to use the same baptismal gown for his own firstborn, who will arrive in October.

[Supertechmom]

You can always take the gown to Good will, a lot of sewers can see the value in the good pieces of cloth and will buy clothing with the intent to reshape, reform that material into many many other things. (and not necessarily clothes either I imagine one could get quite a bit of cute hair bows/hair bands out of the good pieces for instance)

[SerenityNow]

Does anybody else get heart palpitations at all of the advice to "save it for your daughter".

 

My advice DO NOT save it for your daughter(s). Do not perpetuate the cycle of *too much stuff* that she has to decide (and feel guilty or not) whether she should keep it or get rid of it based on her feelings of sentimentality.

 

 

 

 

Oh, I agree with this 100%. When my mom passed away, I became "keeper of the stuff." I have furniture, a grandfather clock, china, crystal, serving pieces, jewelry, scarves, books, linens, a quilt, home decor items, photo albums, kitchen things, stuff of my grandparents.... you name it, it's here. There are so many things that they don't feel like joyful reminders... they feel like burdens. I do have her wedding ring, which I love and wear every day. And I have this funny little glass bird that always sat in her living room, which I love and display on my mantle. Those two thing would have been enough.

[mathnerd]

I attach no sentiment to material things. The people in my life need to be cherished rather than the things in my life. My DH and ILs are hoarders. So, I get a lot of "stuff" from them. It was OK because my house had room - until the kid clutter in addition to it started overwhelming me. I have quietly begun donating all the stuff that is unimportant to me to Salvation army and Mission ministries - they drive in a truck around my neighborhood on specific days and collect donations at the curbside. I subscribe to Flylady and use her ideas to declutter - I donate 6-7 boxes at a time. After they are gone, I hardly miss the items. And I have more room in my home each time! And it is easier to clean too. And my DH is too busy to notice that stuff if missing :)

I would say keep the items from you grandma and ty to use the China every day for dinner for the adults. If that does not work, just donate them. Someone else will get good use of it.

[Mom in High Heels]

Does anybody else get heart palpitations at all of the advice to "save it for your daughter".

 

My advice DO NOT save it for your daughter(s). Do not perpetuate the cycle of *too much stuff* that she has to decide (and feel guilty or not) whether she should keep it or get rid of it based on her feelings of sentimentality.

 

 

Urgh, I have my own set (I was pressured to register for it and caved, now I have 12 place settings and at least 15 serving pieces), my mother is planning on giving me hers, which has 15 place settings plus extra pieces and all the serving pieces, AND I have my grandmother's set, plus all her crystal. WTH am I going to do with all this? I don't even like my china any more and I positively hate my grandmother's china (love the crystal though). My mom's is pretty, but what will I do with it???? I don't even have girls so pass it on to. Oh, I forgot, I also have my great-aunt's set. Crap.

 

We got rid of our every day dishes a while back when I discovered the complete and utter beauty of vintage transferware. It's become a bit of an obsession. JB and I look for it every time we go to flea markets (I love European flea markets!) and at last count I had over 70 dinner plates, 44 luncheon plates, 37 bowls, 39 dessert plates, more tea cups and saucers than anyone should ever have, 12 double handled soup bowls (LOVE), 13 coffee pots (6 with matching sugar/creamer) and 3 tea pots. I have all different colors and patterns and we mix them up for every day use. I do use the red and green ones for Christmas. I display the tee and coffee pots, sugar and creamers, a few of the cups that match them and sever of the plates. I love them all! They are crazy expensive in the States, even at flea markets. The most expensive piece I own is a tea pot that sells for $189 on replacementsltd.com. I paid 17 Euro for it, plus the matching coffee pot, sugar, creamer, 4 dessert plates, 5 cups (2 are chipped) and 3 saucers. Score! If you want to see it, you can click here, then scroll down to the tea pot and click it. It's so pretty. I have the same coffee pot in red too. I know it's insane, but we do actually use them and I never have to worry about not having enough dishes. Mine all date from the med-late 1800's through the mid 1900's.

 

That's a lot of dishes to cart around. I should get rid of my china, but my mom would have a stroke. I'm thinking of telling her to give her china to my cousin. I don't know who would want my grandmother's or my great aunt's china though.

[Guest]

Does anybody else get heart palpitations at all of the advice to "save it for your daughter".

 

My advice DO NOT save it for your daughter(s). Do not perpetuate the cycle of *too much stuff* that she has to decide (and feel guilty or not) whether she should keep it or get rid of it based on her feelings of sentimentality.

 

Use it or lose it.

 

You have 24 hours to evacuate - what are you going to take with you? The rest.... can stay or go. Stay has requirements: It needs to be useful or LOVED, not "it was a gift so I have to keep it".

 

There's my .02 for the day.

 

 

Mmm-hmmm. I get heart palpitations. My mother is towards the hoarder end of the sentimental/saver spectrum. I am toward the "get rid of it" side. She has SOOOO much stuff that is "precious" to her. Once, when I was doing a full-scale cleaning at my parents' house (no mean task), she seriously had a tale to tell about hundreds and hundreds of objects. Some are actually valuable in the monetary/collectables sense, but what good are they doing collecting cobwebs on a shelf up by the ceiling? The sad part of the story is if/when we have to go through the house and belongings, the task will be too huge to spend hours deliberating over E-Baying the Rookwood pottery pieces and selling the antique dolls and learning the actual value of the jade elephant. Only the pieces that have true value to us will escape a mass donation to Goodwill - sad, but true. Very few items are in this category.

 

I totally agree with you. I do NOT want to perpetuate the cycle of, "Look, honey! I made this dress for your first birthday and saved it for you all these years!" Then, the problem becomes hers because, while the dress might be sentimental to me, there is a good chance it is not sentimental to her.

 

Totally agree with you. We should stop do this to our daughters (or sons).

[Alessandra]

Mercy child, where were you raised? 8) You do not get rid. of. the. china. Granted, you have one dd so you can't threaten to give it all to her sister, but you could always bring up this or that niece, or maybe a future dil?

 

My oldest dd is the oldest granddaughter, she just got her grandmother's gorgeous china tea set. Yes, SCORE!!!

 

(Grandmother is still with us, btw)

 

I have lots of china - a full set of beautiful white Haviland with gold, and lots of lovely serving pieces. I love setting a beautiful table, partly because everything I set belonged to my grandmother, great grandmother, or great great aunt. I also have their silver and crystal. It gives me pleasure to know the pleasure they would take in seeing me use it.

 

I also have china I registered for upon marriage. I rarely use it. I only have eight place settings and need 11 for a family event. I have thought about selling it, but it is nice china so maybe a grand daughter will like it. It would help if I had better storage in the dining room.

 

We hand wash everything which is a pain. I don't worry that much about breaks. I am clumsy but have never broken a single piece - I guess when it is in my hands I am careful.

 

Anyway, I say store and save. You have daughters, right? Perhaps it will mean something to them.

 

Option 1: Put the pieces that your grandmother gave you on display somewhere in your home. Sounds like it might look nice sitting on a shelf in the dining room. Then use the rest of your pieces for every day and put them in your dishwasher. Who cares if the gilded edge comes off? You were going to throw the pieces out or give them to Goodwill anyway.

 

Option 2: Try to find the rest of your set somewhere. Is the pattern still available? Can you find it on Replacements.com? If so, have people give you pieces for every birthday and Christmas until you complete your set.

 

Option 3: Find a nice set that compliments the set you already have. It's very sheik now to mix and match china patterns. The gilded edges you already have might look fabulous with some gold plates or a colored pattern. Then mix and match each place setting at your table. There are some teas I've been to whereby several people were responsible for bringing china to the event. All the sets get mixed and matched and the tables are gorgeous.

 

Option 4: Keep the pieces your grandmother gave you on a nightstand in your bedroom. Take a photo of the rest. Then use the 6 plates as dishes to mix paint in for art projects. You could also have your kiddos paint them and hang them as art. I did this with some digital photography. I printed out a photo I had placed a watercolor filter on. I tore the edges of the photo and glued it to the plate. The remainder of the plate was then painted, a couple of jewels glued to it, and other decorations were added. It was a gorgeous art piece which I placed in a bathroom.

 

Option 5: Save them for breaking one day when you determine you are the angriest you will ever be for the rest of your life. It feels good to throw a piece of china every once in a while.

 

 

Agreeing with above posters, I would say that you should complete your set by buying more pieces. Then use the china.

 

FWIW, I love china. I have spring/summer china with flowers, fall/winter china with game birds, Herend, 19th century ironstone, and MUCH more. One of my dc's favorite things about Thanksgiving is that we have special china -- turkey plates, turkey salts and papers, turkey soup tureens, sauceboats, and serving dishes, most of it bought very inexpensively from 'antique' stores and eBay.

 

For those who say sell it - it's not a particularly valuable or rare set. It's Gorham Regalia Court Teal. It was one of the least expensive patterns when it came out and there are pages and pages of pieces on Ebay for less than $10 (though some pieces are priced higher). This does lead to the possibility that I could complete the set pretty easily, but...meh. I just don't want china dishes. I've contemplated doing that, thinking if I had a full set for guests, we could use it, but then we're back to the dishwashing thing again. The china is pretty, but it is equal in my eyes to the attractive Correll that I bought and the Correll is absent of all concern and worry.

 

I think I'm going to give it away. Maybe I'll try Freecycle. I'll keep grandma's gift, though, because I care about it and it's a sweet memory for me.

 

 

OK, I looked up your pattern. It's nice & safe, but boring. I'd probably change my vote and get rid of it. If it doesn't make you feel special when you use it, then it is a burden.

[Alte Veste Academy]

We should stop do this to our daughters (or sons).

 

Well, I agree that we shouldn't be hanging onto and handing down an entire house full of stuff, claiming hundreds (or even thousands) of items as precious memories. So, yes, I think if it's extreme, it has a good chance of becoming an unwelcome legacy. But for those of us who are just hanging onto a handful of the most precious baby clothes, family china...a few small tokens, I think it is sad to contemplate not handing down some treasures. My kids already look forward to reading some of their old baby books to their kids. They help me whittle down their personal libraries as they get older, keeping only what they have loved to save. (This almost kills me sometimes, as they reject a classic that I bought practically gilded, LOL, but whatever.) DD looks forward to using her tea sets for tea parties with her kids one day. All three already bicker over who is going to get our dining room table and chairs. :lol:

 

I don't know. Too much is too much, but too little is too sad to me.

[happypamama]

I vote for getting rid of it. Unless your daughter has said how much she loves it, don't save it for her -- let her choose her own pattern if she wants china. I do like the idea of keeping some as a tea service, though.

 

(That being said, I don't even have china; I didn't register for it because we thought it was a little silly to have part of an expensive set that we couldn't afford to complete, when we also were just starting out and needed basic stuff. However, a few years ago, I started collecting handmade pottery from a particular artist, and that I love. It's not quite as fancy and formal as china, but it's more *us.* I do use it sometimes, usually for company or nicer meals, and it IS completely dishwasher safe. However, we don't currently have a working dishwasher, so we hand wash everything. I do like that it is obviously special, and it does automatically dress up the table.)

[unsinkable]

Anybody else waiting for this thread to drop off the front page?

 

I am...and here's why.

 

I read the title and immediately think:

 

Try the grey stuff! It's delicious!

 

Don't believe me? Ask the dishes!

 

 

 

 

You're welcome. Ear worms by "unsinkable."

[justamouse]

Totally agree with you. We should stop do this to our daughters (or sons).

 

My girls all love the stuff we have, and they are asking that I keep it for them. When I sew them dresses, I make heirlooms. They have and wear sweaters that their great grandmother knit. They love them. They love our china, it brings wonderful memories.

 

My family watches things like Pickers and we search out antiques we all love and the kids love being a part of it. They love seeing things that we have, and finding out the history of the items.

 

To each their own. I love our house with all of its antique stuff, and all of my family treasures. My children love it, too, and our house is beautiful.

[Julie Smith]

I have nothing much to add to the conversation except.

 

We don't have a working dishwasher. Haven't for years. I actually don't really miss it.

[Tina]

Well, I have a couple 8 piece settings that I use occasionally, from my great aunts. I like the bowls sometimes because they are shallow and wide versus the normally deeper ones of my everyday dishes. We use those occasioanally.

 

A week or so ago, I invited a few girlfriends over for a light dinner/snack and a movie. I really enjoyed getting out the special pretty dishes and some fancy cut bowls, and enjoyed sharing their beauty. Something I never do with the kids around. And we've reached the point where we want to start inviting friends over regularly, two couples at a time, so I plan to start using them a lot more!

[justamouse]

Well, I have a couple 8 piece settings that I use occasionally, from my great aunts. I like the bowls sometimes because they are shallow and wide versus the normally deeper ones of my everyday dishes. We use those occasioanally.

 

A week or so ago, I invited a few girlfriends over for a light dinner/snack and a movie. I really enjoyed getting out the special pretty dishes and some fancy cut bowls, and enjoyed sharing their beauty. Something I never do with the kids around. And we've reached the point where we want to start inviting friends over regularly, two couples at a time, so I plan to start using them a lot more!

 

That's what I do, too, when guests come, the China tea cups come out. I had a bible study for 6 weeks and when they came I had China tea cups and a teapot ready, man, they loved it and I loved treating them that way.

[Melissa in Australia]

Sigh! I almost wish I was given china. My wedding presents were of the most practical kind. towels and more towels, a set of hideous bed sheets, a used double bed ( found out later that I was given it because the owner didn't want to pay for it to be dumped), an ironing board, a photo of FIL house, a lemon tree and a rose bush. I also received a bunch of feathers and a bathroom plug from my then 6 year old twin brothers :thumbup1: .

[peachskittles]

I want china dishes, the older the better. I will never inherit china from my grandmother or my mother. I'm pretty sure I have absolutely no family heirlooms and that makes me sad. This is me though, not you, so if the china doesn't make you happy then donate or sell it to someone who will love it. I'm hoping for an anniversary that I can scrounge up money to buy a set of china. I'm also the weird person that would like different sets of plates for the different seasons. Clutter doesn't bother me as long as it has a home. My sister, on the other hand, hates clutter and every time she comes into my house she tells me all my problems would go away if I would donate half of the stuff in our place. It is probably her problem that would go away because clutter stresses her out, not me.

[fraidycat]

Well, I agree that we shouldn't be hanging onto and handing down an entire house full of stuff, claiming hundreds (or even thousands) of items as precious memories. So, yes, I think if it's extreme, it has a good chance of becoming an unwelcome legacy. But for those of us who are just hanging onto a handful of the most precious baby clothes, family china...a few small tokens, I think it is sad to contemplate not handing down some treasures. My kids already look forward to reading some of their old baby books to their kids. They help me whittle down their personal libraries as they get older, keeping only what they have loved to save. (This almost kills me sometimes, as they reject a classic that I bought practically gilded, LOL, but whatever.) DD looks forward to using her tea sets for tea parties with her kids one day. All three already bicker over who is going to get our dining room table and chairs. :lol:

 

I don't know. Too much is too much, but too little is too sad to me.

 

We, as a family, all sat down and discussed Mom and Dad's will a couple years ago about how they wish for things to be taken care of re: sale of the property, etc. and how the stuff is to be distributed. We each staked our claim and discussed what we want when it comes time.

 

We each chose one or two pieces that we'd like to keep. Mom has made us each a huge scrapbook of our lives from birth until marriage so we all have copies of photos. The rest can all be auctioned off. We were free to choose more if we wanted, but nobody did.

 

I do like that my parents sat us all down together so we all know exactly how they want us to handle everything in the manner they wish. AND that it's all written down, in case of faulty memories. :)

[justamouse]

I want china dishes, the older the better. I will never inherit china from my grandmother or my mother. I'm pretty sure I have absolutely no family heirlooms and that makes me sad. This is me though, not you, so if the china doesn't make you happy then donate or sell it to someone who will love it. I'm hoping for an anniversary that I can scrounge up money to buy a set of china. I'm also the weird person that would like different sets of plates for the different seasons. Clutter doesn't bother me as long as it has a home. My sister, on the other hand, hates clutter and every time she comes into my house she tells me all my problems would go away if I would donate half of the stuff in our place. It is probably her problem that would go away because clutter stresses her out, not me.

 

I have an oak buffet that holds all of the china, and a bar that holds the crystal. No clutter. :D And I want different sets for different seasons, too.