That's it. That's the LAST straw. I'm done.

[1bassoon]

OK, y'all, don't shoot me.

 

I know I'm the TOG guru. I get that. I love TOG. LOVE love love it. It is working beautifully for my family. . .

 

Except for my 12yo dd.

 

For the THIRTEENTH week in a row (yes, we are on week 13) she has come to our discussion NOT PREPARED. As in, "I didn't even read the book" not prepared. As in, 'Couldn't be bothered to look at the reading pages and see what pages were assigned' prepared.

 

I'm done.

 

I just told her to go to her room, finish the reading, and we'll have her discussion on Friday. YES Friday.

 

This afternoon, I'm driving to our local Christian book store. I'm going to pick out the most dry, boring, "Read-The-Chapter-Answer-The-Questions" textbook I can find, and THAT my friends is what she is doing for the entire rest of the year.

 

Clearly, with my zany schedule, I don't have enough hours in the day to hold her hand and make sure she does what she's supposed to. Maybe next year I'll try her back on TOG.

 

But I'm done.

 

:glare:

 

Thanks for listening.

[justLisa]

Well at least you have a plan? I was looking at the cupcakes.

[Georgiana Daniels]

Sorry to hear that. Often kids don't realize what kind of opportunities they are missing until later in life. ToG is an amazing program. Hopefully she'll wake up when you've got her doing the boring stuff. ((hugs)) for your frustration.

[DarlaS]

There are some subjects with some kids in some years that we take the Git 'R Done approach.

 

I took one look at TOG and immediately was lost. :bored:

[Catwoman]

:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:

 

Could it be that she simply isn't ready to be independent with her learning, and needs more one-on-one interaction with you? Perhaps she's just a procrastinator and a poor time manager, and gets easily distracted by non-school things, so something like giving her a list of weekly assignments is overwhelming for her and she doesn't know where to begin -- and doesn't have enough motivation to put much effort into it.

 

Personally, if I have to do something I don't like, I still avoid doing it if I can -- and I'm 49. :blush:

 

Have you tried breaking things down into bite-sized chunks and having her in the room with you while she does her work? She's still only 12; she might need some handholding to get her work done.

[1bassoon]

 

Could it be that she simply isn't ready to be independent with her learning, and needs more one-on-one interaction with you? Perhaps she's just a procrastinator and a poor time manager, and gets easily distracted by non-school things, so something like giving her a list of weekly assignments is overwhelming for her and she doesn't know where to begin -- and doesn't have enough motivation to put much effort into it.

 

 

Have you tried breaking things down into bite-sized chunks and having her in the room with you while she does her work? She's still only 12; she might need some handholding to get her work done.

 

 

This is EXACTLY what is going on. And I've done the break it down thing - and really, if I did that, she would probably be fine. BUT. . .I work this crazy, nutty schedule of co-op teaching and piano teaching, and it's just not the year for me to be able to do this. :( Which breaks my heart, but it is what it is, y'know?

 

Maybe next year - I'll be pulling back on some responsibilities - I can be more "there" for her. Ugh. It's just the whole situation, and I can't make it be what it's not. (Is that random enough or what?) I've been TRYING to make TOG work for her, but with all we have going on, it's just not working.

 

I can beat my head against a wall for another 6 months, or try a sanity saving measure. Off to the bookstore now. . . .

[Cinder]

Well I can relate some. I love TOG but my sons did not. Maybe it's partly due to their "engineer brain" as I call it. Maybe it's because they don't enjoy studying history. They had a hard time reading from different sources and trying to keep track of everything. For them the one "voice" of the textbook made things so much easier, more streamlined. We didn't just do the read-and-answer for each section. I also incorporated the mapping activities, outlining, narrations. History is their least favorite subject; the more direct approach made it easier for them to get through it.

 

Oh, and another thing. My ds's would get totally frustrated if the AQ/TQ's could not be answered from the assigned reading. They didn't like leaving questions unanswered and felt that the resources assigned should have the answers to the questions being asked. Otherwise why ask the questions? Why not just address it in the discussion points? They just weren't comfortable with the whole TOG style of learning but it was about 3 years before I figured that out.

[Random]

I know exactly what you mean. Last summer, I even spent a gagillion dollars and hours printing a nifty 'workbook' for my son, who I thought would be working on TOG independently. But, I realized he's just not ready to learn like that. By next year if he matures enough, I'll try again. If not, I think we might try the self-paced Omnibus course from Veritas Press. I really, really, really prefer the resources and presentation in TOG, though.

[Catwoman]

This is EXACTLY what is going on. And I've done the break it down thing - and really, if I did that, she would probably be fine. BUT. . .I work this crazy, nutty schedule of co-op teaching and piano teaching, and it's just not the year for me to be able to do this. :( Which breaks my heart, but it is what it is, y'know?

 

Maybe next year - I'll be pulling back on some responsibilities - I can be more "there" for her. Ugh. It's just the whole situation, and I can't make it be what it's not. (Is that random enough or what?) I've been TRYING to make TOG work for her, but with all we have going on, it's just not working.

 

I can beat my head against a wall for another 6 months, or try a sanity saving measure. Off to the bookstore now. . . .

 

Do what you need to do to maintain your sanity! It's not like you can't try TOG again next year if you're able to lighten up your own responsibilities. The world isn't going to end if your dd doesn't do TOG, so pick the thing that will be easiest for you and will still cover the basics for her, and call it good.

 

Have you considered something like the BJU DVD program?

[delaney]

Are you sure you don't have my 12 year old at your house??? She is the same way. I have to draaaaaaaag her through reading all the time and can't trust her to get it done. It is the way she is wired and I know I can't make her LOVE reading. TOG will only work with her if you read with her or do some books on tape.

[Tracy in Ky]

I understand your frustration. I had to take a break from TOG because ds just didn't click with it, even though I loved it. Hope you find something that works :)

[Alicia64]

What is TOG? I'd love to look into it.

 

Alley

[Mommyfaithe]

This is EXACTLY what is going on. And I've done the break it down thing - and really, if I did that, she would probably be fine. BUT. . .I work this crazy, nutty schedule of co-op teaching and piano teaching, and it's just not the year for me to be able to do this. :( Which breaks my heart, but it is what it is, y'know?

Maybe next year - I'll be pulling back on some responsibilities - I can be more "there" for her. Ugh. It's just the whole situation, and I can't make it be what it's not. (Is that random enough or what?) I've been TRYING to make TOG work for her, but with all we have going on, it's just not working.

I can beat my head against a wall for another 6 months, or try a sanity saving measure. Off to the bookstore now. . . .

 

You know what....go get the textbook....assign the pages, and no guilt! Really, it will be ok.

 

[1bassoon]

Some of it is giving up my pride: "Look at meeee! I'm the SUPER MOM who can make TOG work with my family! With no co-op!"

 

Really? I'm just tired. If I was home every day schooling, I could assign an hour each day for her to sit with me, and I could spend the academic year coaching her. She'd love that, and it would work.

 

But the reality is that I'm only home on Mondays and Fridays. That's how it is this year.

 

I bought BJU Heritage Studies 6 yesterday. (THANK THE LORD for a Christian bookstore that carries BJU stuff!) It still covers ancients, and I think it will work for her. Read the pages, do the activity guide, and maybe do a project or two with her little sister.

 

I'm slow to learn, but we have to do what WORKS, not what I think SHOULD work. Make sense?

[Twigs]

What is TOG? I'd love to look into it.

 

Alley

 

Tapestry of Grace

 

also, you can search theses forums for "TOG" or "Tapestry of Grace" and get lots of good info.

 

Best wishes.

[Twigs]

Some of it is giving up my pride: "Look at meeee! I'm the SUPER MOM who can make TOG work with my family! With no co-op!"

 

Really? I'm just tired. If I was home every day schooling, I could assign an hour each day for her to sit with me, and I could spend the academic year coaching her. She'd love that, and it would work.

 

But the reality is that I'm only home on Mondays and Fridays. That's how it is this year.

 

I bought BJU Heritage Studies 6 yesterday. (THANK THE LORD for a Christian bookstore that carries BJU stuff!) It still covers ancients, and I think it will work for her. Read the pages, do the activity guide, and maybe do a project or two with her little sister.

 

I'm slow to learn, but we have to do what WORKS, not what I think SHOULD work. Make sense?

 

:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:

[Julie in CA]

I bought BJU Heritage Studies 6 yesterday. (THANK THE LORD for a Christian bookstore that carries BJU stuff!) It still covers ancients, and I think it will work for her. Read the pages, do the activity guide, and maybe do a project or two with her little sister.

 

I'm slow to learn, but we have to do what WORKS, not what I think SHOULD work. Make sense?

It will be ok. My kids LOVED learning their history from textbooks, though I did try to toss in good books that would tie in with where they were in their textbooks.

TOG would have been *exactly* how I would have wanted to learn history when I was young, but imo, my kids have a learning style that is every bit as valid as mine.

[Cinder]

I'm slow to learn, but we have to do what WORKS, not what I think SHOULD work. Make sense?

 

:grouphug: This totally makes sense to me. When I first started homeschooling I found WTM and it felt so right. I tried various history programs that worked with that style. But ds1's best year for history was the year we used an Abeka book for a spine and filled in with library books. The next best year was when we focused on WWII and used The Good Fight and filled in with library books. (It's not letting me link. :glare: ) Did I get the hint then? Nope! I then heard about TOG and got on board with that. And even with my ds's frustration and complaints I still tried to make it work. For 3 years! I finally smacked myself upside the head and switched to a textbook. History still wasn't his favorite but he liked it slightly better with a text and there was a lot less fussing.

 

I hope the switch works out well for you!