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OrganicAnn Posted May 20, 2012 Share Posted May 20, 2012 Since you have no financial wiggle room, I would not do it. If find these situations sometimes end with less payment than expected or payment is not as prompt as expected and it doesn't seem like you could afford that if it happened. I would recommend your neighbor ask a relative to drive him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peaceful Isle Posted May 20, 2012 Share Posted May 20, 2012 Since you have no financial wiggle room, I would not do it. If find these situations sometimes end with less payment than expected or payment is not as prompt as expected and it doesn't seem like you could afford that if it happened. I would recommend your neighbor ask a relative to drive him. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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elegantlion Posted May 20, 2012 Share Posted May 20, 2012 That isn't something I would be comfortable doing. 12 hours is too long in the car for a one day trip, even if you have multiple drivers. So you'd have two nights (there and back) in a hotel, which I would expect to be covered. I would expect them to put me up in a hotel and have access to a vehicle and even request a per diem for food and activities. By the time you add it up, that's a hefty expense, and yes I would expect to have my hotel covered. You don't list how many or the age of your kids, but that might factor in my decision too. I wonder why they are insistent on asking you. Why can't the friend come visit in your town? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnM Posted May 20, 2012 Share Posted May 20, 2012 when you say they keep upping the offer, what do you mean? Have they said exactly what they would cover? If it were clear that car, gas, food (at least partial food) and a hotel would be completely covered and in his name paid up front, I would agree to it. I think maybe if you explain that you don't even have the $$ for it upfront and that they would HAVE to pay from the start and you do want to do it, you might be able to get things negotiated. Dawn That was my initial reaction, too. I've turned them down 3 times, the last time being this morning. The neighbor and friend just keep upping the offer. I guess we'll just keep saying, "No, thank you.", and spend our family time hiking and swimming close to home this summer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pegasus Posted May 20, 2012 Share Posted May 20, 2012 Make an itemized list of expenses that you expect to be covered (rental van, gasoline, hotel room for a week, tolls, a reasonable amount for food over and beyond what you would spend if you stayed home, etc.). Present this to your neighbor to give to the friend. If it is too high for him, you won't have to say "no" anymore. If he is willing to pay it, then you have a vacation with most of your expenses covered. :D Pegasus Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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DawnM Posted May 20, 2012 Share Posted May 20, 2012 Honestly, if I were in his situation, I would be happy for someone like you to do this for me and I would compensate you for the week. It may mean LESS involvement for you in the long run as well if he decides to move down there. Dawn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teachin'Mine Posted May 20, 2012 Share Posted May 20, 2012 I would tell him very clearly what the trip would cost you - including the overtime your husband would miss - and then let him make an offer based on that. If he could compensate for any losses and maybe get you a hotel or pay a for your camping, it could be a win-win situation. Money may not be such a concern for him and he'd be happy to compensate well. Doesn't hurt to talk with him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Murphy101 Posted May 20, 2012 Share Posted May 20, 2012 My dad does this now to come visit us. His heart is too unreliable to travel 12 hours. For the companion, all food, lodging, vehicle expenses, and any other expenses are covered. Usually they get a little bit of fun spending as well. However, they don't usually just drop him off. They stay with him everywhere he goes. And he goes all over the place from sunup to well past sun down. If dad decides to go to an auction - they go. If dad sees a movie - so do they. If dad eats out - so do they. If dad visits me - so do they. It's still cheaper than flying and renting a car. And he doesn't have to ask anyone to take him anywhere or let him borrow their car. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Truscifi Posted May 20, 2012 Share Posted May 20, 2012 Given how involved you are already, that the friend is hoping to convince him to move there, and has the money to cover it, I would consider it. I agree with pp that you should make an itemized list with what it would cost you and present it to the friend/neighbor. Then just go from there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted May 20, 2012 Share Posted May 20, 2012 I feel uncomfortable asking him to pay for a hotel for us and we definitely don't know him well enough to stay in his home, so maybe we'd spend the week camping in a state park instead. Dh has the vacation time to go, but he will be missing out on over $300 of overtime that we rely on just to pay the bills. Where does he expect the driver to stay? Can you go with the kids, hubby work, and the friend put you up in one of the long stay motels, so you could eat in? If that could happen, that would be an adventure I'd consider. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bettyandbob Posted May 20, 2012 Share Posted May 20, 2012 Where does he expect the driver to stay? Can you go with the kids, hubby work, and the friend put you up in one of the long stay motels, so you could eat in? If that could happen, that would be an adventure I'd consider. This is what I was thinking. I don't know how old your kids are and how that would factor. When my dh is working longer hours he likes it if we aren't home. 2 months ago I took the kids 9 hours away to visit my godmother when dh had a big project to get done. I would expect that the friend pay for my hotel stay. Look up what's available in the area and rates. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QuirkyKidAcademy Posted May 20, 2012 Share Posted May 20, 2012 Just wanted to add that 12hrs in one day is totally doable. My family has driven that - and a lot more - dozens of times over the years. That doesn't mean you have to do it all in one day, but it is possible. Good luck with your decision. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JFSinIL Posted May 20, 2012 Share Posted May 20, 2012 Make an itemized list of expenses that you expect to be covered (rental van, gasoline, hotel room for a week, tolls, a reasonable amount for food over and beyond what you would spend if you stayed home, etc.). Present this to your neighbor to give to the friend. If it is too high for him, you won't have to say "no" anymore. If he is willing to pay it, then you have a vacation with most of your expenses covered. :D Pegasus Make sure to get the money upfront, too. Sounds like you can not afford to have someone (not your neighbor, but the other person) not pay up once the trip is done. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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