Jessica @ Trivium and all other organized hs moms, how many hours are in your days?

[home4school]

I have been visiting Jessica's blog lately for inspiration and there have also been others I just can't recall right now. Do you have more than 24 hours in your days? How to you schedule your day to fit all this in? You hs, plan hs, do a blog, apparently even read books! How do you find time to fit it all in? I come here and lurk mostly, but even the links and ideas I come across here that I download never get put to use, because I never get past the "surfing the net part"! I guess I need some direction to my days! Just curious how all you organized, plan for the whole year, blogging moms do it!

 

Blessings,

Kim

[MommyInTraining]

I'd love to hear responses to this too! Especially from those moms who have many little ones and seem to be able to do so much!

 

Thanks!

[Staci in MO]

But I often get asked how I find time to blog and read all the books I read.

 

In my case, I make the time because it's what I want to do. I'd rather read than watch TV, scrapbook, weed the garden, sleep, and (sometimes) surf the net.

 

Unfortunately, I would also rather read than do the laundry, clean the house, and cook supper. Sometimes that happens. :blush:

 

For me, the ages of my children is a big factor. Everybody can take care of themselves in the bathroom, fix themselves a snack, and get themselves a drink. My older two are capable of fixing meals, as long as it's something simple.

 

Although I can't speak for Jessica, I suspect she gets a lot of joy and satisfaction in making those lesson plans. I am not near the planner that she is, but I always tell my husband I would rather plan a homeschool year than actually do it (not implying that Jessica is that way, I'm just speaking for myself).

 

Blogs can be misleading. I can blog about a great book I've read. I may not mention that I'm so behind on the laundry that the kids are digging clean underwear out of the dryer or that my family is eating hotdogs and canned peaches for supper that night. I don't think that anyone is intentionally trying to mislead anyone, but people tend to write about the things they are most excited about.

[2cents]

Well I gave up blogging so that is how I do it these days. :)

 

I found that the time on the net was eating up too much of our day even though we are very schedule oriented. For me the online stuff was just too much of a distraction and I wanted to put the effort into the hsing and cut back on having a webpage, blogging and net time in general. I still go through spurts of net activity but that doesn't last long and I get over it pretty quickly.

 

I also limit telephone time with friends. I find that both hs and public school friends call me a lot and that is a huge distraction and time flies by quickly while you're chatting with friends. So now I have 'no ring' times and that has helps tons with time management.

 

We also get up early in the day and begin studies by 7:00 or 7:30. We keep to the schedule and find that if we're focused, we are done by 1 or 2 at the latest.

 

When I first started hsing, I was very much into online hsing groups, net activities associated with hsing and outside co-ops but as I have gone along through the years, I find myself becoming more picky about where I put my efforts. I have let some activities/associations go for the sake of centralizing more of those efforts back into my homeschool.

 

It is all about finding the balance that works for you. That balance that you find is not going to be the same as others. The only thing you want to really accomplish is finding what makes your homeschool the best for yourself and your children.

[G5052]

I truly believe that not all of us are called to do "everything." I know some in the homeschool world who seem to do a lot, and some who seem to do less, and in the long run I really don't think it matters a whole lot. Our basic energy level, abilities, and temperment are so very, very different from one another. Maybe because we've been homeschooling awhile now and because I'm middle-aged, I personally don't stress too much any more about not doing "enough." I think more about what I really "should" be doing versus what I "might" be doing.

 

Now granted, some would say that I do have a full platter. I work full-time part of the year, homeschool, take classes for professional development here and there, and do most of the house/yard because my DH is disabled. To me, that is a reasonable load though. I have a lot of energy and am very focused. I had multiple jobs at a time all the way through college, and worked full-time in a research position while going to graduate school. So this level of activity has been the norm for me for a long time. HOWEVER, that is about all I do. I no longer serve on the board of my local homeschool group, I no longer teach Sunday school. We rarely entertain or go out of town because of DH's limitations, and maybe take one vacation a year. So it's a reasonable load for me personally. I turn down volunteer and paid work all the time because I know my limits and what my priorities are.

 

For me to be a blogging, plan-from-scratch homeschooling mom would put me over the edge. Something would have to give, and I'm not willing to drop other things to be that way. So I blog when I can on my plain-jane blogs which I could make "something" but I won't, and I use largely scripted homeschooling materials, frankly changing little from year-to-year. I could be a plan-from-scrach mom (and was that way several years ago), but I'm not.

 

Individually taking stock and determining what is reasonable and most important for ourselves and families is a much more important task IMHO than trying to find the time to do "it all." Putting a priority on what you're doing at home with your children is far more important than curriculum and blogging, trust me. Some are able to spend a lot of time on curriculum matters and blogging AND homeschool their children well, but some are not. In the end, it's the one-on-one with your children that comes #1.

 

HTH!

[WTMindy]

I will go ahead and put myself into that category. A couple of things come to mind because I have analyzed this before. I can get a LOT done in a day.

 

1. I have a mind that multi-tasks and tends to see the easiest way to do things. I almost never do one thing at a time. I read while I exercise (and even while I blow dry my hair.) I listen to audiobooks while I cook or clean. I fold clothes or knit while I watch TV. (I watch VERY little TV). I correct papers and plan lessons while my kids are doing their work. I'm also on the computer while they are doing their work when they don't need my help.

 

2. I read very fast. Now, there are down-sides to this because I also tend to do things not very thoroughly. I read lots of books (I am already 75% done with my 888 list) but I read them fairly surfacy. I have a horrible time remembering later the books that I have read. I don't dig deep into them and really soak them in. There are a few that I will go back to and take a second look at, but mostly I read and then promptly forget much of what I've read.

 

3. I get up early. I am not a natural morning person, but I love having the time to exercise, read my bible, play on the computer, etc..

 

4. I have a husband who really helps me a ton!! He likes a clean house and helps to keep it that way. It is a priority to him that we train our kids to keep their things clean and organized, so things stay pretty clean around here. He also helps me by planning the meals for the week and grocery shopping sometimes. I cook, but it is such a big help to have him tell me what he would like to have!! He also is "on duty" with the kids in the evenings when he gets home, so I have free time to do what I want/need to do. He also helps me to be more self-controlled than I would be on my own just by having high expectations. (This is a good thing for me!)

 

5. I'm not a perfectionist, so I can do things to a reasonable level and then be good with being done. My best friend is a perfectionist and it takes her a LONG time to do things, but they are always done at an extremely high level and way better than what I could do. Sometimes I wish I were more like her because everything she does is excellent. However, I can get a lot more done than she does with very little stress. So, there is a trade-off.

 

6. I am naturally organized. I seriously love my label-maker and thinking of ways to organize things. I get a rush from school supplies!! :001_smile:

 

This got longer than I meant it to be, but I think it is important to remember that we all have different strengths that we bring to the table and that those strengths are usually paired with a corresponding weakness. Those of us who appear to get a lot done might not do it as thoroughly as others who do less.

[Love2Smile]

Could someone post the link to Jessica's blog?

[Trivium Academy]

From 6 am to 10pm (lately, not always)

 

It takes about 5 minutes to create a skeleton spreadsheet and then I can work on it once I print it out at my leisure. I cannot do it all at the same time and most of the time something is lacking, mostly housework.

 

I read in increments- whenever I can but that depends on how much I want to read the book. I keep the book with me, I'll read while waiting for water to boil, waiting in line, outside while the kids are playing, etc. You find time for the things you want to do and what you feel is important. I strive to work smart, not hard and I try to streamline anything I can.

 

My blog is our digital journal of our homeschool, it is not a place where I discuss disagreements that I've had with my dh or any other 'real life' things. If we are behind or slacking in our studies, I say so. If I can't figure something out, I blog about it but it's about homeschooling or parenting not anything else. I do my best to keep it a realistic view of our journey and if there is something going on that would be harmful to put out there, I don't blog about it at all.

 

I have bad habits, attitudes and I am a sinner. I try to be as honest as I can about that but I feel it's more important to keep trying to improve, not to keep reflecting on how I should be better or comparing myself to others.

 

I always have to have a "project" going, and sometimes it's more than one at a time. One of my closest friends has 6 children and I tire her out with all my ideas at times! She has really been a saving grace, helping me see the important things- as well as the veterans on these boards.

 

All I can say is that you find your own way, my way probably won't be ideal for anyone else. I do love to plan, it makes me feel like I've got it together, even if it's an illusion because we never really have it all together! Lol. It looks mighty good on paper though!! Don't get the wrong impression, I do work to accomplish what I plan but the plan changes too.

 

Here's a typical day here:

6:00-6:30 wake-up, coffee, email, shower

7:00 kids are up, breakfast, watch Curious George while eating

7:30 send kids to their rooms to dress, make beds, brush teeth

----meanwhile, I'm cleaning up breakfast dishes, starting 1 load of laundry

 

8:00 start lessons, work through until done usually around lunch

12:00 lunch, clean up

12:30-5:30 kids play whatever they want (ride bikes, backyard, etc., they play well together)

6:00 dinner

8:00 bedtime with read alouds

10:00-10:30 my bedtime

 

Now I'm changing this after we move, the afternoons will be filled with activities to do WITH the kids except for 2 hours of free time. I play with them now but not consistently enough. I will be spending a lot less time here, which is right --because being on here is not my life. Doing yoga with the kids, making sure our dog is walked everyday, learning a new craft with the kids, having afternoon tea is so much more important to me and I want to take the time to DO it.

 

Don't get me wrong, I spend a lot of time with my kids and I have a very good heart connection with both of them but I also know I could be doing more...so I will.

 

 

:auto: Going to finish packing and cleaning...

[HFClassicalAcademy]

I feel like I get to do a lot in a day. I am heavily into making schedules and planners. They help me keep track of what I need to do. I enjoy blogging and I take it as our homeschool journal...something like an e-book of what the kids and I are up to. It also helps me to put things in perspective when it comes to what I want to do...kind of like writing your thoughts down.

 

My days usually start at 7-7:30am (although I'm going to start aiming for 6am now). The ending time is usually 10-11pm. I try to do things as I go and my cleaning has gotten a lot lighter since I cracked the whip and made all of my dc participate.

 

I keep my laptop in the school room (next to our kitchen) so I come on the net as I have time. A minute here, 10 there, etc. It adds up and I'm able to do some quick research that way or start up a new post for my blog.

 

I am one of those who are ALWAYS striving to be active with the kids. If they are not busy, I get them busy with school, crafts, or play. I take them everywhere with me and I'm quite a pro at shopping with 4 little kids now.

 

Of course, I have been known to fall behind with things like laundry...but I eventually always catch up. I try to focus on what I can do and control. The rest will fall into place. Praying hard and asking for help from above;) is the best thing I can do to make my days go smoothly.

 

Liz

[Elaine]

I have been visiting Jessica's blog lately for inspiration and there have also been others I just can't recall right now. Do you have more than 24 hours in your days? How to you schedule your day to fit all this in? You hs, plan hs, do a blog, apparently even read books! How do you find time to fit it all in? I come here and lurk mostly, but even the links and ideas I come across here that I download never get put to use, because I never get past the "surfing the net part"! I guess I need some direction to my days! Just curious how all you organized, plan for the whole year, blogging moms do it!

 

Blessings,

Kim

 

I echo Mindy and I am a naturally organized perosn by nature. I can't go to bed unless the house is clean, laundry is done and diswasher is set to run. It doesn't seem stressful to me, because it is how I am. :tongue_smilie:

 

I think you need to find the perfect balance for you and your family.:001_smile: I know that when I first began coming to these boards 4 years ago, and read about all of the things that the wowderful moms here do, I wanted to sit on the kitchen floor and eat whipped cream right out of the can. It is just not possible to run your homeschool like so and so runs their homeschool.

 

Getting more organized is great. Streamline your day by getting up earlier, planning ahead for meals. I do this on the weekend. I am famous for, "Doh! It's 5 o'clock! What should I cook?" Planning and shopping on the weekend takes that stress out of the equation.

 

Keep a lesson book or spreadsheet. I am an old fashioned, write by hand lesson book gal. I like to see my week organized on paper before I begin. That gives me a good sense of direction. And, I don't stress if I am unable to get everything accomplished. There's always next week. As an aside, if you find that you are habitually not getting something done you might want to remove it from your agenda and add it in later. Sometimes just getting rid of one thing for a season will do wonders.

 

Hang in there. :001_smile:

 

ETA- My day goes from approximately 8 am to 1 am

[rafiki]

.

[74Heaven]

I loved reading this thread. I am a naturally organized person with 5 DISorganized kids and a disorganized husband.

 

1.) I *like* working; getting things accomplished, seeing hte next thing marked off the "to do" list.

 

2.) My home lacks some of the "grace" that I see in my much-less-organized, "relaxed homeschooling" friends' homes. I want to learn from them.

 

3.) I am homeschooling 5 kids so I try not to envision or even *think* too much about what a mom with three or fewer kids is doing. (It is a different world.)

 

4.) If you have a child in diapers, are potty-training someone other then the "potty-training in one day" children - and/or have a newborn - your life is *totally* different from those of us with olders. (My youngest is 5 and life is *totally* different now then a few years ago.) Just last week my gf with 4 kids aged 8-under and 2 years of medical issues (incl bedrest for 3+ months and two surgeries and off/on school) - she planted her first garden in two years! I was so happy for her. Her youngest (7 kids) is now 3 - her life is so diff. now! She is mostly recovered from the medical issues and surgeries. She can have more "structure" now.

 

5.) If I get too focused on homeschooling, I neglect my husband's needs and service outside the home duties or plans. If I get too focused on home management, the homeschooling suffers. If I get too focused on hs planning, the laundry and meals suffer. If I get to focused on academic mastery and accomplishment, the creativity and free time pursuits suffer.

 

It is all about an ongoing balancing act! Keep juggling!

 

One more thing - if you are nursing or have a baby or a toddler, you really "can't have" the opptys that those with olders have. I can't say it enough - try to live with the disarray and cherish the moments. It really is night and day difference to have children who can get themselves a snack or put away their laundry or be counted on to read quietly and not dismantle their room during quiet room time!

 

lisaj, hsing 5: ages 5,8,11,13,15

[Amie]

I am still striving to be one of "those" moms as well. One thing I've come to realize though is how much time the internet can use up! I can spend so much time on this board and "researching" and not even realize how much time has gone by. One great tip that works for some people is to set a timer for your internet use. This might make you feel like a child, but it works. If you have a bit of a schedule and you know what you need to accomplish in a day, you can probably decide ahead of time how much time you can devote to "surfing the net" and such whithout hindering the rest of your to-do list. Then when time is up--get off the computer and work on the next thing. Sometimes I think I've only been on the internet for about 10 minutes or so, but in reality its been more like 20 minutes. Setting a timer for 10 minutes will tell me EXACTLY when 10 minutes has gone by--not when I think it has. I too love to plan, research, map it all out, but then I don't always get around to implementing all of it. I'll admit, I know how easy it can be for me to spend an afternoon on Jessica's blog and then get up and wonder why I can't seem to do as much as she does. :o

[WTMindy]

 

3.) I am homeschooling 5 kids so I try not to envision or even *think* too much about what a mom with three or fewer kids is doing. (It is a different world.)

 

lisaj, hsing 5: ages 5,8,11,13,15

 

Great points!! I forgot to say in my post that I only have two kids and they are at the same level in most subjects so my work is substantially less than moms with more children!!

[Stacey]

Lots of great things to think about. I am planning to spend this week figuring out how to schedule our days. I think I mainly just need a schedule for our school time.

[5wolfcubs]

Kim, how old and how many children do you have? Jessica (my hero!) has two, although her ds might be more energetic then my three sons put together! How many children you have and their ages makes a big difference in what you can do...

 

Just last night I made a rough daily school schedule for the coming year -- school would start a 8am and end at 4pm with a snack...that includes:

2 half hour segments of individual time for each of my 5 children,

2 half hour segments for snack & lunch,

1 half hour segment for the boys together work,

1 half hour segment for the girls together work,

1 hour outside active time (exercise, gardening, nature study)

 

I didn't like it! I know we'll all be tired by 4pm snack time...no one, including me, is going to want to clean! We're all just going to want to vegetate in front of the computer, I'm sure!

 

But, in reading Jessica's post above, I realize that I have 16 hours also...more actually, as I get up at 6am and don't usually go to bed until 11-12. :) School is just 8 hours. Half of my time! Just half! Granted, breakfast & dinner cooking and kitchen clean up probably takes three if I'm honest. And my boys bed time routine takes about an hour...so there is 4 more hours accounted. I still have FOUR hours. I think I'll start crocheting! :)

[Frontier Mom]

I'm an organizer!! I like coming up with schedules and plans. However, I'm not all that good at implementation. I love buying office supplies, setting up notebooks, going through our new curriculum. It's really sad, but that's just me.

 

I read by keeping several books going at one time. I always have a book with me so I can get an hour of reading done waiting for a baseball game to start, while I'm cooking, etc. I just love to read.

 

I blog because I like to be learning something new all the time. Currently, I am working on my digital photography skills and I have been making my blog layout "unique." I've searched the net and gotten help from some special people here, but I love the challenge. It seems I always need a project going on.

 

All of this takes time and, as such, my house is never completely clean. I'm a borderline perfectionist so, if I can't spend all day, I don't even want to start cleaning. I try to work on relaxing and doing a little along the way. Sometimes I relax way too much and the house is a wreck!!

 

Some things I want to work on that others suggested are: getting up earlier, planning meals and shopping on the weekends, and having a plan all year long. Now, I have to go make a plan for these.... lol.

[Lovedtodeath]

I typically have 16 hour days. (9am - 1 am) At least 7 of which are spent comforting and nursing my teething toddler. I can watch TV and surf the net while comforting him. Sometimes I can read. I mostly do a lot of thinking and planning in my head, because he likes to mess with anything I am trying to do, LOL. This has been about 2 weeks. He typically takes around 4 hours which is more doable. Before that, we all had the stomach flu. DH painted the living room and I had to keep the kids away from him. We had a religious convention to attend. I am getting less sleep because I stay up after he is in bed in order to get housework done. I still have to get him back to sleep every 45 minutes to an hour or so when I am not with him. My house is a wreck, I am stressed out, and DD is falling behind in school.

[Peela]

I have 2 kids of similar age so take my situation in perspective.

We have a really good routine going, and it kind of happens all by itself nowadays. The kids must be up by 7am though for everything to go ok. In order to be up by 7am they need to have lights out by 9pm, which means bed at 8pm (so they can read). I find that is foundational and dh is good about helping me ensure that we don't have late evenings too often. I also find it foundational for my peace to go to bed by 10pm at the latest. 9 is better.

 

The kids do morning chores, I have my alone time and time to do chores, before school. I walk, do yoga, meditate, put on a load of washing and put away dishes, first thing.

We do school from 8.30 till early afternoon, and I literally sit at my desk in the schoolroom while they work, apart from when I read aloud and we do couch time. I am available, and I don't leave the room much except to make a snack, lunch, hot chocolate, coffee for me, whatever. So, since my kids don't need me so much nowadays, I have a lot of time to check emails and visit message boards,and sometimes write on my blog,as well as pay bills online, plan ahead etc, just during school time- while still being available for questions and to help the kids.

 

Then in the afternoon they usually can finish anything by themselves, and do their school reading, while I go to my room and rest and also have a couple of hours to read, if I want.

 

Its still only 3 or 4 pm by this time, giving me plenty of time to do some more housework and prepare dinner, walk the dog, go to the supermarket, etc The kids entertain themselves. Ds has friends on the street, dd rides her bike to art and sewing classes, or chats to her friends online, or plays on Photoshop, or does some artwork.

In the evenings, we eat together, the kids do their chores, and sometimes we watch a dvd together.One evening they do Scouts, another they go to gymnastics.

Often, particularly as we are just coming out of long evenings here in Australia, its already time for showers and bed.

 

Dh works evenings so that leaves me from 8pm onward to myself again. It's a great lifestyle for a computer addicted , readaholic, meditative introvert like myself! I am trying to go straight to bed at 8pm and getting to sleep by 9pm lately, because I just read a great book called Lights Out,

amazon.com/Lights-Out-Sleep-Sugar-Survival/dp/0671038680/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1212485614&sr=8-1

about us needing 9.5 hours sleep in winter, and I am experimenting with that. It feels very luxurious!

[sweetbaby]

3.) I am homeschooling 5 kids so I try not to envision or even *think* too much about what a mom with three or fewer kids is doing. (It is a different world.)

 

5.) If I get too focused on homeschooling, I neglect my husband's needs and service outside the home duties or plans. If I get too focused on home management, the homeschooling suffers. If I get too focused on hs planning, the laundry and meals suffer. If I get to focused on academic mastery and accomplishment, the creativity and free time pursuits suffer.

 

It is all about an ongoing balancing act! Keep juggling!

 

:iagree: You definitely have to find balance by prioritizing.

~Kysha-hs mom of a teenager, twins, a very inquistive 9 yo who is going on 35 and a nursing toddler.

[mom2att]

I will go ahead and put myself into that category. A couple of things come to mind because I have analyzed this before. I can get a LOT done in a day.

 

1. I have a mind that multi-tasks and tends to see the easiest way to do things. I almost never do one thing at a time. I read while I exercise (and even while I blow dry my hair.) I listen to audiobooks while I cook or clean. I fold clothes or knit while I watch TV. (I watch VERY little TV). I correct papers and plan lessons while my kids are doing their work. I'm also on the computer while they are doing their work when they don't need my help.

 

2. I read very fast. Now, there are down-sides to this because I also tend to do things not very thoroughly. I read lots of books (I am already 75% done with my 888 list) but I read them fairly surfacy. I have a horrible time remembering later the books that I have read. I don't dig deep into them and really soak them in. There are a few that I will go back to and take a second look at, but mostly I read and then promptly forget much of what I've read.

 

3. I get up early. I am not a natural morning person, but I love having the time to exercise, read my bible, play on the computer, etc..

 

4. I have a husband who really helps me a ton!! He likes a clean house and helps to keep it that way. It is a priority to him that we train our kids to keep their things clean and organized, so things stay pretty clean around here. He also helps me by planning the meals for the week and grocery shopping sometimes. I cook, but it is such a big help to have him tell me what he would like to have!! He also is "on duty" with the kids in the evenings when he gets home, so I have free time to do what I want/need to do. He also helps me to be more self-controlled than I would be on my own just by having high expectations. (This is a good thing for me!)

 

5. I'm not a perfectionist, so I can do things to a reasonable level and then be good with being done. My best friend is a perfectionist and it takes her a LONG time to do things, but they are always done at an extremely high level and way better than what I could do. Sometimes I wish I were more like her because everything she does is excellent. However, I can get a lot more done than she does with very little stress. So, there is a trade-off.

 

6. I am naturally organized. I seriously love my label-maker and thinking of ways to organize things. I get a rush from school supplies!! :001_smile:

 

This got longer than I meant it to be, but I think it is important to remember that we all have different strengths that we bring to the table and that those strengths are usually paired with a corresponding weakness. Those of us who appear to get a lot done might not do it as thoroughly as others who do less.

 

Hi Mindy--my name is Barbie. I think we were twins separated at birth--I could have written your post! I feel a little more "normal" now, just knowing there is someone else who reads while drying her hair, can't remember a book after she's read it, and can get many things done fairly well (my dh is a perfectionist who takes FOREVER to do things, but they are excellent. I can work circles around him, but it shows in the quality!). Thanks for sharing!

[home4school]

I never expected so many replies! Now, I feel even WORSE!!! I am ashamed to say I only have TWO sons and they are..........10 and 12! I know, I know, I don't know what my problem is!

 

The thread awhile back about "If you ...... you may not be a homeschooler" or something like that, you know like the "you might be a redneck", made me think we need to give up right now! Neither of my sons like to read, even HATE reading. They worship thy holy TV, big battle always there. They don't want anything to do with learning, if they think they are doing something besides "school" and are learning, they'll joke, "Oh, this is learning! We better stop!" I think I have killed their natural instinct and curiousity to learn. :(

 

My oldest ds is a handful. He wants me to sit with him for everything he does. I have tried to wean him, but it hasn't happened. He has a very short attention span and can't stay focused. That ticks me off! I'm sitting with him, trying to help him get done, so I can do what I need to do, and he's talking about the bird that flew past the window (behind him, don't know how he saw it!) and I'm fuming!

 

This has given me lots to think about. We ALL need more scheduled time for our whole day, not just school, I think. With my older, I tried setting a timer for xx minutes to help him complete each assignment and anything not done within that time had to be done by him in his room alone that afternoon. I caved to the crying and I need your help, Mom...I don't know what to do.....Can you just explain this......So then here I was at 5:00 trying to cook supper and help him with his math! My consequence for him turned into torture for me!

 

My problem is inconsistency. I come up with things to try to help our days, but don't stick it out. All this I think is causing me to feel drained all the time and not want to tackle anything above and beyond the tedious everyday things I have to do. YKWIM? I used to get up super early and get tons done. Now, I can barely drag my lazy self out of bed! When I do, its just the usually daily tasks, school, cleaning, laundry, cooking. Nothing fun or exciting anymore.

 

I need to shake things up this summer. Start having fun, take control of my son who has taken control of me! Take control of my days, my life......;)

 

Thanks for all the input!

 

Blessings,

Kim

[Tami]

 

The thread awhile back about "If you ...... you may not be a homeschooler" or something like that, you know like the "you might be a redneck", made me think we need to give up right now! Neither of my sons like to read, even HATE reading. They worship thy holy TV, big battle always there.

 

My oldest ds is a handful. He wants me to sit with him for everything he does. I have tried to wean him, but it hasn't happened. He has a very short attention span and can't stay focused.

 

My problem is inconsistency. I come up with things to try to help our days, but don't stick it out.

 

Blessings,

Kim

 

Hi Kim!

 

I think we have all "been there!" You are the leader in your home, and you MUST be consistent. Sit down with your dh and write down what your guidelines for behavior are and stick to them together. It would be great for you to sit down with your kids and apologize for the way things have been going. I have had to do this many times! Apologize for being inconsistent and for letting things get chaotic. Tell them how things are going to change.

 

Watching tv is usually the biggest downfall to a love of reading for distractible kids. Dear one, TURN IT OFF. Turn off the computer games and Nintendo as well. Go to the library and get a stack of fiction books, audiobooks, activty/art books, and science books of your kids choice. Put them in a basket and don't say anymore about it. If the media of off, the kids are going to get bored, and detox for a while. Let them. You must be consistent here.

 

After there is nothing more 'stimulating' to do, they will eventually pick up a book of interest, build something, play a game, or go outdoors. You WILL see an improvement in attitude without all the media. It will get worse before it gets better, but I encourage you to take the plunge! Media can kill the desire for some kids (like mine) to do more productive things, and that's why it is called the "Plug In Drug," it is so addicting to certain kids.

 

You simply must gain their respect back by being firm, loving, and sticking to your guns. Enlist the support of your dh and friends to keep you accountable. The problem is not with your kids, it is with the lack of consistency and the fact that more freedom is being given than your kids can handle at this point.

 

Also, consider HSing your full-time job. Stop multi-tasking during school hours. Shorten the school hours if you need to, and don't be irritated or distracted when your kids need you to sit with them or supervise them. That is your job. Your kids need you as a mentor and teacher more than they need a pile or workbook pages to complete. Get everyone doing the chores, so you can be more freed up to teach and mentor, rather than being inundated with housework and distracted.

 

If you like to read, something like Parenting With Love and Logic, or Shepherding a Child's Heart may be helpful to you.

 

We are rooting for you. You can do it!!!!

[Isa]

I think we can all find one or two hours a day that we have free to do those things that we like to do. Those times for me usually occur either early in the morning, mid-afternoon, or evening.

 

The trick is not to let the things you like to do take to much time so that you're not doing what you should be doing. This can sometimes be a challenge, and in my case it involves setting limits of how long I'm on the computer during the day so I'm not shortchanging my children and neglecting my responsibilities.

[Peela]

I need to shake things up this summer. Start having fun, take control of my son who has taken control of me! Take control of my days, my life......;)

 

Hi Kim,

I just want to empathise about your son...I have a challenging son who really wants me to sit with him a lot. He can also turn on a pity party at the drop of a hat and can even turn on tears and tantrums very easily (he is 12!)... Over the years I have learned to try and give him things he can do independently as much as possible, but we still do some subjects together. I keep lessons short. I have also had to stand really firm, even in the face of devastated tears, because if I back down too often, wow, I am then subject to twice the show next time!

Hang in there. I think it is the most challenging things I do with homeschooling- teach my son, who pushes back, daily. But I am getting much better, and so is he.

You are right...consistency is the key.

[home4school]

Tami,

 

Thanks for the input. I know I need to step back up and get in control, its just hard to take the reins again once you've lost them to the kids!

 

I didn't mean for it to sound like I didn't want to sit with them while they do school, its not that. I just get frustrated that my ds12 thinks he can't do anything without me telling him every pencil mark to make! I noticed you use CLE math. That's what we use, too. An example of my frustration with him would be the "Skill Builders" and "We Remember" sections. These should be review, right? Practicing skills they have already learned. I can understand a question here or there, but its every single problem....What do I do here.....How do I do this.....I don't remember these. It has me rethinking the whole program. Maybe he needs more of a mastery program. But I thought it would help him TO remember if he had to touch on things often. I really can't figure this one out!

 

I guess I'm just really frustrated more with myself than anyone else. I see all of you here who do such a great job in your hs and get so much done. I used to be you! I have lost control of my life, of my days, of my hs, of my kids. Only I can get it back. I was talking to a friend the other day about some of this and she said maybe I'm the one in school here. God is trying to teach me in this and apparently I'M the one not learning the lesson, not being focused where I should!

 

Thanks!

 

Kim

[home4school]

Thanks, Peela! Its nice to know its not just us! He just can be so trying! He absolutely can wear me out! I love him to death, but sometimes I could just pinch his head off! If I say black, he says white, etc. It doesn't matter what I tell or ask him to do, he always has another suggestiom, way, time, whatever. Its never just "Yes, ma'am." I know his "Take the lead" personality will serve him and hopefully the Lord well one day, if I teach him how to harness it. Ahhh, another lesson for me to learn. I am no leader! Maybe he can teach me a thing or two!

 

Blessings,

Kim

[Eleni]

Thanks, Peela! Its nice to know its not just us! He just can be so trying! He absolutely can wear me out! I love him to death, but sometimes I could just pinch his head off! If I say black, he says white, etc. It doesn't matter what I tell or ask him to do, he always has another suggestiom, way, time, whatever. Its never just "Yes, ma'am." I know his "Take the lead" personality will serve him and hopefully the Lord well one day, if I teach him how to harness it. Ahhh, another lesson for me to learn. I am no leader! Maybe he can teach me a thing or two!

 

Blessings,

Kim

 

LOL! i have a kid like this too...but he is younger. I have wound up in tears many days because of how HARD everything can be with him. but he is such a vibrant little person and has a strong personality, good character and awesome sense of humor. to him "no" means ask a different way, try a different perspective....make the sale. dh is in sales and loves how ds is always trying to close. :001_huh:

 

im not very organized and get distracted by a million things all day. I like making schedules but implementing them makes me feel all itchy. :tongue_smilie:

[Tami]

Tami,

I noticed you use CLE math. That's what we use, too. An example of my frustration with him would be the "Skill Builders" and "We Remember" sections. These should be review, right? Practicing skills they have already learned. I can understand a question here or there, but its every single problem....What do I do here.....How do I do this.....I don't remember these. It has me rethinking the whole program. Maybe he needs more of a mastery program. But I thought it would help him TO remember if he had to touch on things often. I really can't figure this one out!

 

Kim

 

Hi Kim!

 

Ok -- is he really forgetting or is he manipulating you to get you to do his work for him? WHat is your sense?

 

Did you start CLE at the beginning of the year? I don't recommend starting anywhere in CLE but with the first Light Unit, because the review will become frustrating when they haven't had ALL of the teaching.

 

If your son doesn't know how to do the problems, calmly say, "Oh, hon, you must need more PRACTICE then." Help him as needed, and then give him extra problems later in the day. THis will also help you discern if the problem is truly lack of mastery. Either way, more practice should solve your problem.

[5wolfcubs]

Kim, I posted before, not know how many kids/ages you had...I certainly didn't mean to make you feel bad! :grouphug: I've had days/weeks/years where I am just frustrated with everything & everyone! We've never had TV but online interactive w/ other people computer games are just as addictive -- like msg boards, but you can run around too!

 

Just over a year ago we were in a bad place w/ computer gaming. The school year, which had been a good one, was finishing up and the kids didn't have much left academically, so it was easy to let them play online a lot more. And I remember it being very frustrating for everyone -- when they were on the computer there was peace, but once they got off everyone was grumpy & bickering & it was just lousy!!

 

So, dh said no computers during the week until school was completely over for the year. It was rough at first, as all the attitudes (mine included) got worse before they got better! But dh stepped up and bought a D&D game and some miniatures and we played that in the evenings and the kids' talked and read about it during the day. I would have caved to the misery at first, but since dad made the no computer rule, I had a solid wall to back me up. :)

 

Anyway, that is my BTDT story -- you aren't alone!

 

Tami gave you great ideas & encouragement (some I'm going to apply myself)! I am planning to start CLE for several subjects for my oldest who will be 8th grade this coming year and am starting her back on the CLE 600s, based on the diagnostic tests. But I'm very concerned (not telling her this!) that I am going to get the same response you've gotten about the review work. :glare: She likes to be independent, but only if she knows the material or can easily figure it out.

 

My scheduling idea for the coming year will be for each child to get 2 half hours w/ me -- it is going to go in this order starting after breakfast:

 

K'er

3rd grader

3 yo

6th grader

8th grader

 

Then we'll break for a snack. So my 8th grader will have worked alone for 2 hours. I plan to give her assignments (for the whole year) broken down into what has to be done each week to finish in 36 weeks. Most of the subjects are designed to be independent (CLE, Wordsmith, Total Health) and she will start working in one subject of her choice until she a) gets to something that starts to frustrate her or b) finishes the day's assignment. Then she'll go on to the next subject until a or b happens. When we meet for the 1st time, I'll explain anything she doesn't understand and discuss her Wordsmith assignment. Then after snack break, she'll work another 2 hours and then we'll meet again before lunch. If she runs out of work she understands, she will read assigned literature or do some of the enriching things I have planned (like listening to different classical composers & drawing while she does). After lunch she'll finish anything undone before she, my 6th grader & I meet to discuss history & literature. Hopefully in an interactive, Socratic fashion!

 

Something along these lines might work for you and your kids. Say they each work independently for 30 minutes at the start of the day (while you clean up breakfast, shower, prep dinner, read!), then you spend 30 minutes w/ one and then 30 with the other. Then repeat... If they get frustrated/finish before their turn with you, they can read! And it doesn't have to be school reading -- it could be Warriors/Guardians of Ga'Hoole type books or some non-fiction on a sport they like or whatever. Or they could exercise.

 

Another idea that I had for our family but haven't implemented is having a game time. We probably have 15-20 board games but rarely play. I thought I'd write down all the names of all the games (or have a kid do it) and then once a week the kid who has dinner clean up will draw a game name. And we'll all play the game. Then that name will be set aside until all the games are played. If you decide to go no TV, a game afternoon would be great!

 

Oh, and I tend to do things for awhile then slide back into old habits. It helps me to set a time limit. We are going to do this for two weeks (with a chart) or we are going to do that until you've earned 10 stars, etc. In fact we're in a 4.5 week chore trial right now. We started mid week and then each child will do one full week, ending w/ the zone they started in. We'll reevaluate then...no changes until then. I've already found a few things I think should be rearranged (like I forgot to assign someone to fold the laundry!!) but am not making any changes or allowances until we finish (which means there is big pile up of clean laundry in my room!). It helps everyone to have an ending goal.

 

Sorry this got so long -- apparently I need to get off the computer and go play in the yard with the kids!

[NorCalMom]

...I know that when I first began coming to these boards 4 years ago, and read about all of the things that the wonderful moms here do, I wanted to sit on the kitchen floor and eat whipped cream right out of the can....

 

:lol::rofl: So funny...that's how I feel sometimes! :lol:

[home4school]

Yeah, I have an IRL friend that is "Martha Stewart" of hsing and life in general. In the beginning, I thought she was someone to aspire to, now it just makes me want to slit my wrists! (just kidding, kinda')

 

Kim

[Elaine]

:lol::rofl: So funny...that's how I feel sometimes! :lol:

 

It's comforting to know that you are not alone, right?:D

[NorCalMom]

It's comforting to know that you are not alone, right?:D

 

Absolutely! :cheers2:

[M in Canada]

I recommend a book called "How to have a 48-hour day" by Don Aslett