Liz CA Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 ...and multiple conversations are going on, do you find you are listening to other conversations while talking with someone? I have observed several times that some people seem to be speaking to one person then turn around and interject a remark into another conversation that they must have been following with one ear. ;) I don't possess this skill but I also think it's nicer to give the person to whom I am speaking my full attention. Your thoughts? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QuirkyKapers Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 When I am in a room and there are multiple conversations, it is hard for me to stay focused and really hear what the person in my conversation is saying to me. So, I get distracted. However, I haven't turned around and interjected anything in another conversation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bang!Zoom! Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 You'd never *ever* bust me doing that. I was brought up under a fairly strict social setting code and how to behave in group/social conversation. Uh uh. My ma would spin in her grave. Lightning would fly down from the sky. No way. Nope. Not even in a bar under the influence. Nope. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Perogi Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 When I am in a room and there are multiple conversations, it is hard for me to stay focused and really hear what the person in my conversation is saying to me. So, I get distracted. However, I haven't turned around and interjected anything in another conversation. :iagree: It's difficult to go out for dinner as "date" with dh because I get so very and truly distracted by other conversations. I don't necessarily want to listen and I have NEVER suddenly interjected but I do get very distracted. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
5of5 Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 I saw a science special about multi-tasking a long time ago, and if I recall correctly, women are supposed to be better than men at following mutliple conversations. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daisy Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 I follow multiple conversations at the same time (and have been known to interject comments into conversations it wasn't apparent I was following). And I'm not entirely sure why I do this because I'm introverted and inside my own head most of the time. I can follow what's inside my own head (which is a lot) as well as the multiple conversations. It's pretty schizophrenic. :lol: Hm, maybe this is why I find social situations so exhausting. BINGO. I don't interject into other people's conversations because that is rude, but I find it impossible not to listen to everything going on around me. It is overwhelming. I'm reminded of the scene in the most recent Sherlock Holmes movie when Holmes is sitting in the restaurant waiting for Watson. He can see and hear everything going on in the room and looks pained by it. THAT is exactly how I feel in a crowd. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daisy Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 Ok, interjected isn't quite the right word. I will add to the conversation (not in a rude interrupting way). ;) I think that is fair game if everyone is casually speaking with each other. You can usually tell when a conversation is publically private (lol). I hate all that social junk. Leave me at home, please. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gailmegan Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 I think it's hardest when I'm out to dinner with a group of friends and we are all at one big table. It's not possible for everyone to be one conversation because those at the far ends can't hear, so if I'm in the middle of the table I always feel split between conversations on either end. I want to be in all the conversations, extrovert that I am, but I don't want to be rude either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
specialmama Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 I used to be able to "overhear" different conversations (never interject, that's rude!) but due to a neurological disorder I've inherited from my grandfather I can no longer do this. It's been about 8 years since I've noticed a decline in my ability to handle background talking and noise. I just can't tolerate it and will quite literally have a breakdown. So my mind trained itself to hyper-focus on one thing to the extreme neglect of all else. It can be quite amusing or scary, depending what I'm missing out on. Long and short of it is, I have to hyper-focus if I'm having a conversation. That means, no radio on in the car, and blocking all other noise. If you have my attention, you have it good. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starr Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 I only hear in one ear now and it really keeps me honest. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WistfulRidge Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 First, I'd rather avoid any place with enough people for multiple conversations. I don't like being around lots of people. However... yes and no. I'd never turn around and interject into another conversation but I do habitually listen in on every conversation that I can, well, hear. I am aware that it is rather rude, but honestly I've enough social anxiety that I find it soothing to be able to "track" people by their conversations. It makes the dreaded social events a little easier to handle. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mungo Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 ...and multiple conversations are going on, do you find you are listening to other conversations while talking with someone?I have observed several times that some people seem to be speaking to one person then turn around and interject a remark into another conversation that they must have been following with one ear. ;) I don't possess this skill but I also think it's nicer to give the person to whom I am speaking my full attention. Your thoughts? I have done this. Sorry. :blushing: I don't think it's really rude in the sorts of gatherings that I am thinking of though. I have an excess of attention. FWIW, I am probably paying more attention than most people who are inside their heads instead of listening to everyone in the room at once. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KidsHappen Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 I have six kids, of course I can do that. I can carry on six conversations at the same time and most of my kids can follow all the conversations as well. My poor hubby can barely follow me when I am all be myself and when he tries to listen to me talking to six different people at the same time he gets hopelessly confused. I consider it to equivilant to multi-tasking which is essential with six kids, four cats and two dogs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 I could listen to multiple conversations at once, but I can "turn it off." Maybe tune it out is a better description. I can watch TV, talk on the phone ans answer email at the same time. Probably not well, but I can do it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liz CA Posted October 20, 2011 Author Share Posted October 20, 2011 I have six kids, of course I can do that. I can carry on six conversations at the same time and most of my kids can follow all the conversations as well. My poor hubby can barely follow me when I am all be myself and when he tries to listen to me talking to six different people at the same time he gets hopelessly confused. I consider it to equivilant to multi-tasking which is essential with six kids, four cats and two dogs. In your case it is perfectly amazing and brilliant and not rude! :D I was more thinking in a large gathering situation where women and men tend to segregate a little and carry on their own conversations. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littleWMN Posted October 20, 2011 Share Posted October 20, 2011 I follow multiple conversations at the same time (and have been known to interject comments into conversations it wasn't apparent I was following). And I'm not entirely sure why I do this because I'm introverted and inside my own head most of the time. I can follow what's inside my own head (which is a lot) as well as the multiple conversations. It's pretty schizophrenic. :lol: Hm, maybe this is why I find social situations so exhausting. :iagree: This exactly. I almost always get distracted by conversations around me at restaurants and DH has NO idea how I do it. I wish I didn't. If it's too loud, I can't focus at all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happyhomemaker25 Posted October 20, 2011 Share Posted October 20, 2011 All. The. Time. I don't interject unless I know the people very well and I know they won't be offended. The worst is at restaurants. I'm like a freak show with my friends. They always want to know what's going on at other tables. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KidsHappen Posted October 20, 2011 Share Posted October 20, 2011 In your case it is perfectly amazing and brilliant and not rude! :DI was more thinking in a large gathering situation where women and men tend to segregate a little and carry on their own conversations. :001_smile: Thanks. I really can't remember if I have always had this ability or if I only picked it up after a few children but it certainly comes in handy for those times when they think mom isn't listening. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheReader Posted October 20, 2011 Share Posted October 20, 2011 It is very hard for me to stay focused and not get distracted in that sort of situation. Well, in a crowded room where little groups are all over, and I'm talking to one person in one group, that's a bit easier actually. But what happens to me often is we go out to dinner with this one other family. The wife & I sit next to each other, each with our own husband across from us. The guys will talk about one thing while she & I talk about something else and in those close quarters, yes, it's hard to keep focused on just her and what she's saying, and I do find myself drifting into and out of the conversation with the guys. But I think I'd do a little better in a group setting where there's more space than directly across the table between me and the other conversation. I do recognize that I do this, try hard not to, etc; I'm working on it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hwin Posted October 20, 2011 Share Posted October 20, 2011 No, I usually even pretend not to hear when someone is talking to me and takes a phone call. I can't help but listen to other conversations in that sort of setting, but I find it distracting, not interesting, or a lovely chance to multi-task. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustGin Posted October 20, 2011 Share Posted October 20, 2011 Ha, ha - I know this is a serious question but the first thought that came to my mind is a memory of my 5 sisters and my Mom having a good old 20? way conversation. LOL Growing up in an all girl family, no Dad around, we would almost always have these mulit-tasking kind of conversations. When I got married, and dh first spent time around the 6 of us, he was stunned and needless to say, quite overwhelmed. All that to say, though of course it's polite to give your full attention to one person who is talking, some people do very well at carrying on more than one conversation at a time. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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