Impish Posted September 4, 2011 Share Posted September 4, 2011 Wolf isn't the most communicative guy on the planet, when it comes to emotions. He can joke, tease, etc, but when it comes to emotions, he tends to be more the 'strong, silent' type. I admit that I've found this frustrating during our marriage. I'm a talker. (Anyone surprised by that? LOL) Anyways. I've posted here about having ongoing Braxton Hicks. Wolf hasn't said much, just given me the wide eyed, deer-in-the-headlights look. But yesterday, he dug out the basinette that we've had stored since Princess, and the baby swing, put all the covers in the wash, rearranged the furniture in our room, and put the basinette up there. Over the years of our marriage, I've come to realize that if I pay attention to his *actions* I can see his emotions. He's worried about the baby coming early, so doing what he can to prepare for baby is his way of expressing it. Def an 'acts of service' kinda guy. Well...that and giving out orders :lol: "Drink more water" "Go lay down" "Get out of that chair and let Mom put her feet up" I'm glad I finally figured out how to read him...and regret how much I've missed before, not understanding his way, but being frustrated that it wasn't *my* way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaxMom Posted September 4, 2011 Share Posted September 4, 2011 Wolf isn't the most communicative guy on the planet, when it comes to emotions. He can joke, tease, etc, but when it comes to emotions, he tends to be more the 'strong, silent' type. I admit that I've found this frustrating during our marriage. I'm a talker. (Anyone surprised by that? LOL) Anyways. I've posted here about having ongoing Braxton Hicks. Wolf hasn't said much, just given me the wide eyed, deer-in-the-headlights look. But yesterday, he dug out the basinette that we've had stored since Princess, and the baby swing, put all the covers in the wash, rearranged the furniture in our room, and put the basinette up there. Over the years of our marriage, I've come to realize that if I pay attention to his *actions* I can see his emotions. He's worried about the baby coming early, so doing what he can to prepare for baby is his way of expressing it. Def an 'acts of service' kinda guy. Well...that and giving out orders :lol: "Drink more water" "Go lay down" "Get out of that chair and let Mom put her feet up" I'm glad I finally figured out how to read him...and regret how much I've missed before, not understanding his way, but being frustrated that it wasn't *my* way. What a sweetie. Now drink your water and go lie down! :toetap05: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted September 4, 2011 Author Share Posted September 4, 2011 What a sweetie. Now drink your water and go lie down! :toetap05: :lol: I drink any more water, and I'll spring a leak somewhere! He's taken the kids out hiking, so "Mom can have some peace and quiet for a change" :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sasharowan Posted September 4, 2011 Share Posted September 4, 2011 Yay, at least you figured it out. Mine still confuses me. Maybe I need to read the love language book. Now go rest while they are hiking :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1bassoon Posted September 4, 2011 Share Posted September 4, 2011 How encouraging you are! This has really blessed me today. .. . . . (And I'll chime in: drink that water! Rest!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LibraryLover Posted September 4, 2011 Share Posted September 4, 2011 That's sweet. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted September 4, 2011 Author Share Posted September 4, 2011 Its the sweet moments that keep me from burying him in the yard when he's not so sweet :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted September 4, 2011 Share Posted September 4, 2011 Its the sweet moments that keep me from burying him in the yard when he's not so sweet :lol: Indeed. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nakia Posted September 4, 2011 Share Posted September 4, 2011 I am a talker (words of affirmation) married to an acts of service guy, so I get it. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted September 4, 2011 Author Share Posted September 4, 2011 Indeed. :D I just wonder what keeps *him* from planting me somewhere :001_huh::lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jbemom Posted September 4, 2011 Share Posted September 4, 2011 That is how my dad was. I think I heard him say "I Love You" 2x in my life....but he would do anything for his kids. We used to joke that he should open a company called "Mac's Moving & Storage" because with 5 kids, he was always helping one of us move and letting us store stuff at the house. Trouble with your car...no problem, bring it over. Even without the words, I knew I was loved! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WishboneDawn Posted September 4, 2011 Share Posted September 4, 2011 This week, mine brought me home blackberries that he picked while working at a railroad crossing. :001_wub: You're absolutely right Imp, We have to learn to read them instead of expecting them to always speak our language. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mynyel Posted September 4, 2011 Share Posted September 4, 2011 Wolf isn't the most communicative guy on the planet, when it comes to emotions. He can joke, tease, etc, but when it comes to emotions, he tends to be more the 'strong, silent' type. I admit that I've found this frustrating during our marriage. I'm a talker. (Anyone surprised by that? LOL) Anyways. I've posted here about having ongoing Braxton Hicks. Wolf hasn't said much, just given me the wide eyed, deer-in-the-headlights look. But yesterday, he dug out the basinette that we've had stored since Princess, and the baby swing, put all the covers in the wash, rearranged the furniture in our room, and put the basinette up there. Over the years of our marriage, I've come to realize that if I pay attention to his *actions* I can see his emotions. He's worried about the baby coming early, so doing what he can to prepare for baby is his way of expressing it. Def an 'acts of service' kinda guy. Well...that and giving out orders :lol: "Drink more water" "Go lay down" "Get out of that chair and let Mom put her feet up" I'm glad I finally figured out how to read him...and regret how much I've missed before, not understanding his way, but being frustrated that it wasn't *my* way. Awww! :001_wub: That is awesome! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted September 4, 2011 Author Share Posted September 4, 2011 That is how my dad was. I think I heard him say "I Love You" 2x in my life....but he would do anything for his kids. We used to joke that he should open a company called "Mac's Moving & Storage" because with 5 kids, he was always helping one of us move and letting us store stuff at the house. Trouble with your car...no problem, bring it over. Even without the words, I knew I was loved! Oh, he tells the kids all the time he loves them. Its talking about things that upset him, bother him, etc that doesn't happen. He's not 'romantic' in what he says, or grand gestures...but he'll go to 4 different stores to try and find the ice cream I want :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeckyFL Posted September 5, 2011 Share Posted September 5, 2011 This sounds like more anti-bashing. Should this be reported somewhere? Where are the authorities? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lovelaughs_times_three Posted September 5, 2011 Share Posted September 5, 2011 How cool! I like how he thinks! In the long run, acts of service go so much further than words! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted September 5, 2011 Author Share Posted September 5, 2011 This sounds like more anti-bashing. Should this be reported somewhere? Where are the authorities? :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sahamamama Posted September 5, 2011 Share Posted September 5, 2011 I am a talker (words of affirmation) married to an acts of service guy, so I get it. :D Yup, this is us, too. Sometimes, after I've talked and talked and talked to my husband about X, Y, and Z, I'll ask him, "So, what do you think about it?" He says, "Um, not a whole lot." But then he gets up, brings me coffee in bed, later he makes me lunch, in the evening he makes me Sweet Dreams tea, gives me nightly back rubs, takes the girls outside to play so I can have a breather, always pays all the bills on time so I don't have to worry, and all sorts of other acts of service. Yup, this is us. I'm glad you posted this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted September 5, 2011 Author Share Posted September 5, 2011 Its so easy to overlook sometimes. Wolf does things without fanfare, no hint of what's motivating him...I have to pay attention to figure it out, and then let him know that its appreciated in the vein he intended. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
awisha. Posted September 5, 2011 Share Posted September 5, 2011 Its the sweet moments that keep me from burying him in the yard when he's not so sweet :lol: :lol::lol: This sounds like more anti-bashing. Should this be reported somewhere? Where are the authorities? :lol::lol: You hivers crack me up sometimes :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denisemomof4 Posted September 5, 2011 Share Posted September 5, 2011 aaaaw, what a SWEET husband! YOU are a TALKER? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! REALLY???!!! :lol::lol::lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teachin'Mine Posted September 5, 2011 Share Posted September 5, 2011 aaaaw, what a SWEET husband! YOU are a TALKER? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! REALLY???!!! :lol::lol::lol: Equally gobsmacked here. :001_huh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nakia Posted September 5, 2011 Share Posted September 5, 2011 I read a quote once that impacted me big time in regards to my marriage. "Just because someone doesn't love you the way you think they should doesn't mean they don't love you with everything they have." I used to try and guilt Patrick so he would talk more, share his feelings, profess his undying love for me. It just doesn't happen. He isn't wired that way! I still gently encourage him to talk, but I don't feel unloved anymore just because he doesn't talk to me about deep issues. I mean, this dude went to the store at 10:30 the other night to get me a poptart. He clearly loves his girl! I am so blessed! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted September 5, 2011 Author Share Posted September 5, 2011 aaaaw, what a SWEET husband! YOU are a TALKER? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! REALLY???!!! :lol::lol::lol: Equally gobsmacked here. :001_huh: You're both mocking me' date=' aren't you?[/b'] I read a quote once that impacted me big time in regards to my marriage. "Just because someone doesn't love you the way you think they should doesn't mean they don't love you with everything they have." I love it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.