Being content with the right now....

[Oakblossoms]

I have so much to be blessed! We are healthy and my husband lets me do whatever I want;)

 

But, I really struggle with contentment. I need to be happy here. Sometimes I feel like if I don't God is going to make me stay longer:tongue_smilie:

 

We live in a two bedroom duplex that my family owns. My mother, father and Grandma live upstairs. my parents are nice and I love the time I have had with my Grandma.

 

But, I do struggle with being near them. I want my own place again. Employment has been a struggle since my husband left the USCG. We struggle a lot. I am tired and run down.

 

Any thing you do to be content and take care of your health? I cannot change my circumstances without some major upheavel.

[Negin]

This book helps me a lot. There's no magic bullet, but that book certainly does help.

 

 

I just read this today, "There is no key to happiness. The door is always open."

[Peela]

Can you just do your best - take care of yourself- and cut yourself some slack for not liking the situation? Take the best care of yourself that you can under the circumstances- eat well, take space for yourself, all those things.

 

You can not like the situation, and still find some acceptance that it is what it is for now. Acceptance of the situation means you accept- you may or may not be happy with the circumstances but inside you are not fighting them. You just wait till your circumstance changes, which it inevitably will.

 

:grouphug: (your situation would be hard for me!).

[Carrie12345]

I don't think there's a universally applicable trick to it.

For me, I finally decided that, if it were all to end tomorrow, I want to go happy. So I spend a lot of time making lemonade, iykwim!

[mrs.m]

As soon as the negative and wanting more feelings creep in, I focus on what I do have and I say a prayer of gratitude for those things. The prayer at least ends the feelings for that moment and I can go about my day. But I know they will come back. It's something I really struggle with!

[chiguirre]

I read a meditation from 365 Tao every day. A lot of them deal with contentment and making the most of where you are right now. I find this helps me, but it may not be a good fit if you prefer to stick with your own religious tradition. You may be able to find a similar book with Bible verses, but I don't have one to recommend. The key for me is that the meditation be short, just a couple of minutes, but that it makes me think about some aspect of improving my life seriously.

 

Another thing I find that helps me when I'm feeling overwhelmed is to briefly imagine how my life could be worse. For example, if I'm feeling stressed out about dss' futures, I consider how I would feel if they were killed in an accident. This snaps me right out of feeling discontented with our current situation and makes me feel so lucky not to be in that circumstance. It's sort of an instant contentment booster for me.

[lionfamily1999]

I write down five great things that happened before I go to bed. I review my blessings in the morning. It took me a few days, before I started to really feel like every day was full of great things. I even have to limit myself, at first coming up with five was hard, now narrowing it down is the most difficult part.

 

:grouphug:

 

Just so's you know, I wouldn't use generic stuff, so blessed to have a home, so blessed to have food. Try to find five particular things, my son did his reading without a hitch, my husband told me I was beautiful... that sort of thing, specific to the day.

[Impish]

Thanks for asking this. I'm going to be reading the suggestions.

 

Lately, I've been overwhelmed. Health issues, looming financial issues (WCB stuff again)...just so much going on. Its easy to get bogged down, and only see the challenges, rather than the blessings. :grouphug:

[Parrothead]

Meditation. This book may help.

[amy g.]

Warning: I accidentally slipped into some slight Christian content, but it is not the main focus of my post.

 

I have a new motto that is so simple. "Find the good and praise it."

 

I have everything I ever wanted in life, but suffer from hormonal depression. I'm still recovering from the baby I had 19 months ago at age 43. It was really robbing me of the enjoyment of my blessings. I am doing other things, vitamins, exercise, sticking to my routine, eating right, but what is really changing my reality is finding the good and praising it.

 

My 4 year old has had really beautiful behavior all summer, but had one day of reverting to the epic tantrums of her toddler years. The words I FELT were "You haven't made and progress. She is always going to have problems." I stopped, and looked for what was good and remembered how many miscarriages I had trying to conceive her, and how I cried out to God to give me a baby, and He sent me one that I am ridiculously in love with.

 

I started telling her how it was the best day of my life when God answered my prayer and sent her to me. My reality was changed. Then I noticed her sharing with her little sister, and told her how Miss Happy is going to grow up to be such a nice and fun person because she has big sisters who are kind to her and such good role models. Her reality was changed.

 

This morning my weight was up 2 pounds for no reason at all, but I said, "The good news is the weight doesn't have any option but to move sooner or later." It didn't make me feel helpless and hopeless.

 

I am completely overwhelmed trying to help my oldest prepare for a 17 day fair where she is a vendor. The fun part of planning and experimentation is over, and now we are at the drudgery of cranking out 250 bars of soap a day. So I'm looking for the good. How many people even get this sort of opportunity? This is such good practice for handling later projects she will face in her life, and I get to teach her how to push through and reach a goal. If life as we know it comes to an end, I'll be able to barter with soap."

 

For me, writing down blessings once a day isn't enough. I need to find the good in every single situation and interaction all day long.

[heartosunshine]

Others have given some really good advice.

I see your location; could weather be causing some of this? Not seeing the sun on a regular basis has a HUGE impact on my state of happiness. I need to get out & have my sunshine fix as much as possible. Maybe you could look into Full Spectrum light bulbs?

 

:grouphug:

[justamouse]

Can you just do your best - take care of yourself- and cut yourself some slack for not liking the situation? Take the best care of yourself that you can under the circumstances- eat well, take space for yourself, all those things.

 

You can not like the situation, and still find some acceptance that it is what it is for now. Acceptance of the situation means you accept- you may or may not be happy with the circumstances but inside you are not fighting them. You just wait till your circumstance changes, which it inevitably will.

 

:grouphug: (your situation would be hard for me!).

:iagree::iagree:

 

First and foremost, you need to take care of yourself. NO ONE would do well on a day to day basis in that situation if they were run down and exhausted. So give yourself grace. Sleep enough, east as best as you can, take your vitamins and take walks every day with the kids. Read books you enjoy. Even if you manage to do just that for a week, you'd be surprised how much better you feel and how much better you deal.

[Oakblossoms]

Thank you everyone. Weather is definitely a factor in the winter. I spend summer outside. We would love to move back to California. But, that is part of the major upheavel.

 

There is so much to my story. But, really I think It isn't about all the stuff. Because I coukd focus on all that draining stuff. But, I want to focus on the good.