PinkInTheBlue Posted June 9, 2011 Share Posted June 9, 2011 So, my 15 year old has never shown any interest in girls. No interest at all. Sometimes we've had silly dinner table conversations of "Ok, of all the girls on the Disney Channel shows, who do with think is the cutest? The funniest? etc" Just silly stuff. He always gives the "Ugh, I don't know!" type answers to looks. Anyway, one of his two closest friends has a stepsister that is also 15. Will (our son) came to us and asked us if he could friend her on Facebook. Then he asked if he could text with her since her brother had giver her Will's number. We had a very brief discussion and reminder on time and usage limits as well as keeping in mind appropriate conversations. Several days later it comes up that he really likes her and a few days later he asks her "to go out". (after a moment of panic that he didn't understand the rules, I discover "going out" is the "going together" of my predating teen days) So, I meet her yesterday. She's a cute as a bug, very quite and moderately shy and seems to be a nice young lady. I'm in a panic for some reason! She's just a teenage girlfriend and it's not like he's anywhere within a decade of me not having a fit of him even considering a serious relationship/marriage but it's like I suddenly realize things are WAY too fast in my life. He got his learner's permit last month and is really enjoying learning to drive (my baby!) and now there's a girlfriend. Did you know in only 3 more birthdays he'll be 18??!! . . . Ok, I'm know I'm rambling but between realizing I have NO idea how to be the mom of a boyfriend (I want to know her. I want them to be over here and hanging with us as much as possible. Her family seems nice but uninvolved.), I can't believe my first baby is suddenly SO big (6" taller than me) and just a general panic that ... I'm older, I guess. It's like I've looked up in the last week or two and felt like my life has suddenly began flying by. Does that make any sense at all?? :) Any thoughts? Please, oh please, tell me if you've had this feeling happen as well. Ok, ramble over...I'll go panic by myself. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
learningmama Posted June 9, 2011 Share Posted June 9, 2011 (edited) :grouphug: Not to alarm you even more, but my husband and I first started talking together when he was 15 1/2 and "going out" when he was 16 (I was 18). We married when he was 20 and we have been married for 11 years now! His mom did not like me especially during his high school years. A lot of it had to do with her personality, but but I also know that she did not want him to mess up his life early like she did, so she did not handle our relationship very well. I look at kids in the 15-20 year age and think, "oh my goodness- we were that young and got married after 4 years of being together". I feel for you. My kids are young, but I am not looking forward to all that. I would set lots of limits and be very involved in any teen relationships (but in a positive, nurturing way). At least she's a cute, sweet girl! There's other high school girls I'm sure you would not be too excited to meet! ;) Edited June 9, 2011 by learningmama Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abbeyej Posted June 9, 2011 Share Posted June 9, 2011 Oh, you have my sympathy! Ds is still several years away from this, but a couple of his best guy friends are 2 years older than he is and this year they've each had their first girlfriend-relationships. Even thought they're not *my* baby boys, just sweet kids we've known since they were 7, I'm starting to panic! Yikes! (Oh, and like the last poster, I met my husband when I was 17... Um... Sorry! Unlike the other poster, his mama has always liked me, despite occasionally rubbing each other the wrong way a bit over the years.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tarreymere Posted June 9, 2011 Share Posted June 9, 2011 I would step back for a while, were I you. This romance might collapse next week. Maybe when they hit their one month anniversary you might consider inviting her on a family outing.....:001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snickerdoodle Posted June 9, 2011 Share Posted June 9, 2011 but it's like I suddenly realize things are WAY too fast in my life. :grouphug::grouphug: Mine are nowhere near that age/stage yet and I feel the same. Where are my chubby little babies with fat necks and chubby thighs? :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PinkInTheBlue Posted June 9, 2011 Author Share Posted June 9, 2011 OMG!!!! I meet the boy who would later be my husband when I was 15 also!! Ok, going to find a paper bag now! LOL (in a panicked, hysterical sort of way) Learningmama, you aren't helping at all! You are fired from your job as cheerleader! :) LOL!! (just playing ;) ) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abbeyej Posted June 9, 2011 Share Posted June 9, 2011 Where are my chubby little babies with fat necks and chubby thighs? Aw! Remember their sweet little fat rolls! Those creases in their arms! Now my kids are all bony elbows. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PinkInTheBlue Posted June 9, 2011 Author Share Posted June 9, 2011 I would step back for a while, were I you. This romance might collapse next week. Maybe when they hit their one month anniversary you might consider inviting her on a family outing.....:001_smile: To be honest, after trying type it all out I realized it was much more about me than him. Most teen relationships are fleeting, at best. I'm not preparing myself for how to be a MIL or anything. It's just bewildering to be a very involved mom and yet feel surprised about being here. :) Just having a bit of fun with an odd sensation today. That's all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happypamama Posted June 9, 2011 Share Posted June 9, 2011 This must have been my MIL twenty years ago. Her boy had never shown one bit of interest in girls or dating *at all,* and then in what probably just feels like a blink of her eye, he's about to be a father of four. I think he went from zero to "all her, all the time, ever" faster than they ever expected. I feel for you. :) Just be yourself and be friendly. It's a great compliment to you -- a girl thinks your baby boy is pretty great! She's got good taste. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tarreymere Posted June 9, 2011 Share Posted June 9, 2011 To be honest, after trying type it all out I realized it was much more about me than him. Most teen relationships are fleeting, at best. I'm not preparing myself for how to be a MIL or anything. It's just bewildering to be a very involved mom and yet feel surprised about being here. :) Just having a bit of fun with an odd sensation today. That's all. Not to send you back to that paperbag, but one of my girls did meet her soulmate at age sixteen and they are married with kids and a mortgage now......:lol: Most of mine were around twenty before they decided on 'the one', but we are actually still pretty good friends with some of the boys my daughters dated before they met Prince Charming. You did save a few of those cute baby pictures of your son in the tub to embarass him with, didn't you? My first husband and I met at age seventeen and married at nineteen. He died a few years later so I don't have one of those 'and now we have been together for thirty years' endings, but still...... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mom-ninja. Posted June 9, 2011 Share Posted June 9, 2011 My oldest is 10 and I'm already hyperventilating about the future! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scrapbabe Posted June 9, 2011 Share Posted June 9, 2011 So, my 15 year old has never shown any interest in girls. No interest at all. Sometimes we've had silly dinner table conversations of "Ok, of all the girls on the Disney Channel shows, who do with think is the cutest? The funniest? etc" Just silly stuff. He always gives the "Ugh, I don't know!" type answers to looks. Anyway, one of his two closest friends has a stepsister that is also 15. Will (our son) came to us and asked us if he could friend her on Facebook. Then he asked if he could text with her since her brother had giver her Will's number. We had a very brief discussion and reminder on time and usage limits as well as keeping in mind appropriate conversations. Several days later it comes up that he really likes her and a few days later he asks her "to go out". (after a moment of panic that he didn't understand the rules, I discover "going out" is the "going together" of my predating teen days) So, I meet her yesterday. She's a cute as a bug, very quite and moderately shy and seems to be a nice young lady. I'm in a panic for some reason! She's just a teenage girlfriend and it's not like he's anywhere within a decade of me not having a fit of him even considering a serious relationship/marriage but it's like I suddenly realize things are WAY too fast in my life. He got his learner's permit last month and is really enjoying learning to drive (my baby!) and now there's a girlfriend. Did you know in only 3 more birthdays he'll be 18??!! . . . Ok, I'm know I'm rambling but between realizing I have NO idea how to be the mom of a boyfriend (I want to know her. I want them to be over here and hanging with us as much as possible. Her family seems nice but uninvolved.), I can't believe my first baby is suddenly SO big (6" taller than me) and just a general panic that ... I'm older, I guess. It's like I've looked up in the last week or two and felt like my life has suddenly began flying by. Does that make any sense at all?? :) Any thoughts? Please, oh please, tell me if you've had this feeling happen as well. Ok, ramble over...I'll go panic by myself. :) :svengo:STOP!!! We have all boys here and my oldest will by 15 in January. AAAAGGGGHH!! So sorry! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
8circles Posted June 9, 2011 Share Posted June 9, 2011 I'm dreading the day the girlfriends start. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angela in ohio Posted June 9, 2011 Share Posted June 9, 2011 Did you know in only 3 more birthdays he'll be 18??!! ... I can't believe my first baby is suddenly SO big (6" taller than me) and just a general panic that ... I'm older, I guess. It's like I've looked up in the last week or two and felt like my life has suddenly began flying by. Does that make any sense at all?? :) Any thoughts? Please, oh please, tell me if you've had this feeling happen as well. Ok, ramble over...I'll go panic by myself. :) My dd turned 15, and I have spent a few months in the same place you are. She is 5'9 and so mature (she keeps getting mistaken for a college student or new teacher/aide at her volunteer job,) and she will start driver's ed next month. I, too, feel old, and I am feeling so crazy about how the time has flown, and how you only go around once with them, and how she will be gone so soon and it will never be the five of us just like this again. :crying: I know rationally that this is a great thing, she is mature and ready to move on when the time comes, but I have those moments.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LibraryLover Posted June 9, 2011 Share Posted June 9, 2011 (edited) I'm dreading the day the girlfriends start. :) I love the girlfriends. They are so interesting and fun and smart. I love the banter around the dinning room table during dinner, in the kitchen, the giggles during bananagrams. It's like I have the 6 children I planned so long ago. I know my youngest ds can't possibily end up marrying the girl he started seeing at age 15. :( But I love that girl. She has an amazing work ethic and will be a great mother when she is ready. She is off to nursing school (all on merit $) in the fall. My son is still in high school (he's very mature, and older girls have been more interested him, just in general) so there will probably be a natural break, and I am going to miss her like crazy. My oldest ds has a fabulous gf. I wish they would get married this summer. ;) That is no way for a social liberal to talk, I know. I love the stories she has shared wrt her travels abroad, and I love that she is fluent in a language other than English. Will their love survive law and grad school? Life seems too complicated at times. Edited June 13, 2011 by LibraryLover Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
8circles Posted June 9, 2011 Share Posted June 9, 2011 :) I love the girlfriends. They are so interesting and fun and smart. I love the banter around the dinning room table during dinner, in the kitchen, the giggles during bananagrams. It's like I have the 6 children I planned so long ago. I know my youngest ds can't possibily end up marrying the girl he started seeing at age 15. :( But I love that girl. She has an amazing work ethic and will be a great mother when she is ready. She is off to nursing school (all on merit $) in the fall. My son is still in high school (he's very mature, and older girls have been more interested him, just in general) so there will probably be a natural break, and I am going to miss her like crazy. My oldest ds has a fabulous gf. I wish they would get married this summer. ;) That is no way for a social liberal to talk, I know. I love the stories she has shared wrt her travels abroad, and I love that she is fluent in more than English. Will their love survive law and grad school? Life seems too complicated at times. Thank you. You made my day on this topic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
myfunnybunch Posted June 9, 2011 Share Posted June 9, 2011 :D and :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Running the race Posted June 9, 2011 Share Posted June 9, 2011 My son will be 15 in August. I can't even imagine. Maybe I'll stock up on paper bags! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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