BMW Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 Someone once told me that I would have a hard time with empty nest... You see, I had lots of kiddos. And I adored them. I was a good mommy! And they are growing up! Two years ago one daughter went to spend her senior year with her Uncle and you all were right there with me... She had a great experience. I would chat with her. I went to her graduation. I sent her packages for Christmas and her birthday. I made it through. She graduated and moved out last summer to go to college. Then last year, 3 of my teens went to live with their dad. I handled it pretty well. I looked at the positives. I had been overwhelmed for a long time. And, of course, my dear oldest daughter has spent he last couple months of her pregnancy with us. We get along so wonderfully. I cherish every moment with her... every memory... how she was as patient as could be when she was full term... how I was the one counting and timing contractions... I hold tight to every moment holding my grandson... I love every picture I took... And today she moved into her own little home. My dh was wonderful. He called his dad and we loaded everything up... the rocking chair, the dressers, the baby bouncy... and I cried. I had to blow my nose a few times... Tonight she eats dinner on a tiny end table... her cupboards have her own things in them... she is setting up the baby nursery... I know that I will still see her often. In fact, she will babysit for me tomorrow! I just have to go outside, look up at the big, dark, starry sky and cry out, "Good grief! Why does this hurt?" Anyway... just sharing... sniff-sniff... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chelle in MO Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 :grouphug: Oh, wow. That is just so much to deal with. I'm glad you are appreciating the positives! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 :grouphug: Bee. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jazzyfizzle Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ibbygirl Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missesd Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 Oh man, I feel your pain :( In 2008, my 13 yr old's dad took me back to court for custody because we had to move 8 hrs away for a job. She decided she wanted to live with him, which I was fine with, but she lied to me saying she didn't. I was gobsmacked at court :'( Then a year later, my husband's eldest betrayed all of us, said some very mean hurtful things and went to stay with his grandparents. This year, my oldest son turned 17... he is already counting the days. Of course I remember being the same way... couldn't wait to get out on my own, dreaming of my own little place- what I would do, how I would decorate... of course it was all VASTLY different then what I pictured!! LOL And I know it will be for him too. I am excited for him, and I suppose the other 2 broke me in, but we are *very* close and already I feel the little cracks in my heart starting. Once he goes, we have 2 years, and then EVERY year we have one leaving :( I'll still have my littles for awhile, but by then the 8 yr old will be 12, and it's just sooo close. The time goes by WAY too fast. I go to bed nights wondering how I wasted time, how I could maximize more of my time with them, feeling guilty for "breaks", because I *know* soon enough... this will be all gone, and just thinking about it brings tears to my eyes. I am SO not ready, and I am not sure I ever will be... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KidsHappen Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 :grouphug: Aww, I am down to two and sometimes when they are both gone it takes me a little bit to realize how quiet it is. I visit the kids and gs in GA a lot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TammyinTN Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 :grouphug: :grouphug: I know what your feeling. I'm down to my last one at home and it stinks! Our daughters moved out within 2 years of each other and it was hard. I miss cooking those big meals and loud, funny conversations at the dinner table each night. Our girls 5 mile power walks each morning...I've never gotten my motivation back since they left. I just miss them. I talk to each one daily--one on the phone and one on messenger. I treasure those sweet memories with them. I never forget to tell them I love them each day either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mejane Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 Aww, I am down to two and sometimes when they are both gone it takes me a little bit to realize how quiet it is. Yes. My two are gone for seven hours each day and I often think, "Soon, it will always be this way." :sad: :grouphug: to all the now and soon-to-be empties. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sophia Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 :grouphug: You are a good mom. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BMW Posted February 28, 2011 Author Share Posted February 28, 2011 Thanks. Thanks for the hugs and all. It's not too bad this morning, waking up with less of us in the home... I thought it would be worse. I've never held on to them tightly. I always embraced the "next" thing, knowing that it's just part of life for them to grow up. I cannot say enough how valuable it was to be a stay at home mom... That makes today all the more special. I can look back and remember that I was the one who taught each of them to read... I look back fondly at years of memories... unit studies that ended in celebrations... borrowing the neighbors horse for our wrap up on the Horse summer unit study... our Medieval Feast day... panning for gold at a real gold dredge... lazy summer days eating watermelon and playing in the kiddie pool. There were some really, really rough homeschooling years along the way... I added a baby to the mix every 18 months in the 1990's, fought cancer, and nearly died after my last childbirth. So, you moms who are now in the trenches... hold on! Swap the laundry. Wipe up the jelly. You might not like your math or science curriculum this year... You might wonder if you should focus any more on cursive. Sigh a happy sigh when you see the tossed aside shoes and watch your young ones run around in bare feet. Before you know it, they will be embracing adult lives and you will be so glad to have the memories of these days with them!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denisemomof4 Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:I was heart broken and having some sort of melt down in December as my oldest was discussing his plans for the following year. Now I feel like a wimp as you're going through SO much more!!! Thankfully you still have several kids at home to keep you busy. Hug them when your hurt is too much! :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:you'll make it through this. You will!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rhonda in TX Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 Oh, wow. I'm so sad for you. :( I only have two and they are just 17 months apart. One will leave, and the next year, the other one will. DS starts high school next year, so it is all seeming soooo close. I'm not ready for this! I told my sister (who has 4 kids - youngest is a senior this year), "I stopped having kids too soon." She was so helpful. She said, "Yes, you did." (gee, thanks, sis.) When they're little, it seems like you have all the time in the world. Then life just gets faster and faster. :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phathui5 Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 Have you considered adopting or foster parenting? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Virg Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BMW Posted February 28, 2011 Author Share Posted February 28, 2011 I think we would consider foster parenting in about 6-8 years when our boys are through high school... two of the younger ones require a LOT of supervision and involvement... they cannot be left alone even at 11 and 13 because they just do not behave and cannot be trusted. Once they are through HS years, I just might be ready to care for some other children out there who are in need. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gooblink Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 :grouphug::grouphug: I only have 2 and don't like to think about the empty nest. Sending happy, peaceful thoughts your way. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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