knit247 Posted October 26, 2010 Share Posted October 26, 2010 Is there an age where same-s*x siblings should stop bathing together? My DDs are 9 and 7. They get along incredibly well and choose to share a room - and bed half the time, LOL. They love taking baths together and always have. Rarely - maybe 3x over the course of the last year - DD#1 has wanted a private bath, but it's usually because she wants the toys to herself for the night or a super-hot bath, which DD#2 can't tolerate. In the last week, I have noticed that DD#1 appears to be getting bre@st buds :001_huh: which has me totally freaked out. I am not ready for this. I'm not sure if she's noticed or not. DD#2 hasn't - I am sure I would have heard about it, LOL! At any rate, I am starting to wonder if I should have them take separate baths anytime soon. I hate to stop one of the things they love the most about the pre-dinner hour, but am not sure what to do - how long it will be "appropriate". Also, my DDs see me n@ked most every day :tongue_smilie: If I am in the shower or just out and they happen to come upstairs to their room - which is right after the bathroom - they see me. We rarely shut the door b/c houses here in Germany are sealed so tightly that we have a terrible problem with mold in the winter. I don't want the bathroom any steamier than it has to be. But, I have begun to feel funny about DD#1 seeing me n@ked. Not sure why as she doesn't ever seem to notice and never points anything out. Am I making a big deal out of things? Or is there an age where even same-s*x family members are better off covering up? Oh, and FWIW, DD#1 hasn't seen DH n@ked since she was about 9 mos old & DD#2 never has! The issue is just with the girls (and mama)! TIA - will check back tomorrow AM, my time. It's after midnight here & I am headed to bed! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pamela H in Texas Posted October 26, 2010 Share Posted October 26, 2010 Seriously, they will just stop doing it (even if they were opposite sex). It just happens. Alternatively, I might say, "people with double digit ages bathe alone" if it didn't stop by then and you're uncomfortable about it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JudoMom Posted October 26, 2010 Share Posted October 26, 2010 I've let my boys make that decision, and they seem to start to prefer their privacy around age 10. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hsbaby Posted October 26, 2010 Share Posted October 26, 2010 By the time my kids are 7 or 8 they don't want ANYONE in there:) Guess it just depends on the kids and what you're comfortable with. If it were me I would probably start having them take separate bathes. This, coming from a mom that doesn't even change in front of her 3 year old:tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carrie12345 Posted October 26, 2010 Share Posted October 26, 2010 My dds stopped on their own, maybe a little less than a year ago. The idea of their bathing/showering together in and of itself didn't bother me at all, but now I like to know who to blame for getting water all over the floor. :tongue_smilie: I don't think modesty had much to do with their decision. They still change together, and sometimes share a bed. They just want to be able to hog the bathroom! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pretty in Pink Posted October 26, 2010 Share Posted October 26, 2010 They will stop on their own soon enough. It will just happen. I think I was around ten or so when I became uncomfortable bathing with my younger sister. My ds12 quit bathing with his brothers at 10. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NanceXToo Posted October 26, 2010 Share Posted October 26, 2010 I agree that they just will on their own. I don't have a sister anywhere near my age but I can remember feeling totally comfortable getting dressed and undressed (like changing into bathing suits or something) in front of one of my best female friends up until we were about 11. With the onset of puberty around that time, we just sort of naturally developed our own sense of modesty/desire for more privacy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest mrsjamiesouth Posted October 26, 2010 Share Posted October 26, 2010 Honestly my sister and I took baths together until we were 10 and 8. We always dresses together and with my mom, we had little modesty. I think you are all female and have the same stuff so there is nothing wrong with it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ravin Posted October 26, 2010 Share Posted October 26, 2010 I'm with the majority here--they'll self-regulate this. I wouldn't worry about imposing any restrictions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sue G in PA Posted October 26, 2010 Share Posted October 26, 2010 I personally don't see anything wrong with same-s*x siblings bathing or dressing in front of one-another unless they are uncomfortable about it, kwim? Then, it becomes an issue of respect of ones privacy and modesty. My boys all showered together to save time and water until about a year ago (they were 9 and 11). Dd13 will still bath with dd5 occasionally. I agree with the pp's...they will stop when it becomes uncomfortable. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OrganicAnn Posted October 27, 2010 Share Posted October 27, 2010 I have an only, so this question doesn't arise with us, but I have a friend who stopped having her young DS and DD stop because the DD was getting UTIs and the doctor thought bathing together could be contributing to it. I don't think this would be an issue with same s@x siblings. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AuntieM Posted October 27, 2010 Share Posted October 27, 2010 Well I will be in the minority here, but we cut it off after age 3. That's also when Dad stops assisting dd's at bath time. We just felt this was an age after which they would not likely remember being bathed together. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kwickimom Posted October 27, 2010 Share Posted October 27, 2010 My DS4 already wants to bathe alone and he doesnt want anyone (me included) to see him without clothes. I think most children will just let you know! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UmMusa Posted October 27, 2010 Share Posted October 27, 2010 My oldest two are boy, then girl, and I started bathing them separately pretty young. I think the older one was 4 (or less) which would put the next one at about 2 1/2. My younger three are girls, and I'm not as strict with them. However, I've asked my 8 yr old to bathe on her own since she was around 7. The baby will hop in the bath with my 5 yr old for a rinse off. It's a personal preference, but I did feel more comfortable establishing privacy at an early age. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IsabelC Posted October 27, 2010 Share Posted October 27, 2010 My ds7, dd5 and dd2 all go in the bath together still at this stage. I would anticipate that we'd stop this either when one reaches puberty, or when one no longer wishes to bathe together, whichever happens first. I think it will likely be the latter, as the boy already sometimes chooses to have a shower instead of hopping in the bath with his sisters. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KidsHappen Posted October 27, 2010 Share Posted October 27, 2010 I agree with everyone else. They will self regulate. My youngest two are 11 & 14 and while they no longer shower together they will use my bathroom at the same time. I have a seperate shower and tub. One will use one while the other uses the other. Mom taking a bath means that she can temporarily be held hostage so please feel free to come in and initiate a conversation. This is a mostly girl household so it is not usual to see girls wander the house in various states of undress. I wouldn't worry about it. They will work it out themselves. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Veritaserum Posted October 27, 2010 Share Posted October 27, 2010 My oldest decided at 9 (maybe 10?) that she didn't want to bathe with her younger sisters anymore. We're a pretty open family (I don't freak out if they walk in on me coming out of the shower or getting dressed). So, I agree that it will happen on its own. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
knit247 Posted October 27, 2010 Author Share Posted October 27, 2010 TY all so much. It's good to know that I am not ruining them, LOL! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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