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S/O What age do kids work independant


Tam101
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We spent a few years making a transition from "I need to keep you on task," to, "You need to know what to do to keep yourself on task."

 

DS keeping himself on task can involve trying some different locations, taking reasonable breaks at reasonable times, using a timer, finding a good order of work, keeping a to-do list and a schedule... etc. He was doing reasonably well at that when he was 9 1/2 or so, but he had been working toward that for quite a while then -- we had talked extensively about what I did to keep him on task and whether it worked and whether it was something he could handle himself yet. It didn't mean I could dump him in a room with a stack of books and disappear, but it did mean I could rely on him to take care of lots of things without me and to ask for help when he needed it.

 

If your kid is recognizing when he needs help, I think you're well on your way. It might still be quite a while, but you're heading in the right direction. :)

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It is a slow and gradual process.

 

Here is our timeline:

 

2nd--copywork and a little math on their own

3rd--copywork, math and maybe some english work

4th--copwork, math, english, spelling and lapbook work

 

By 5th you can have them mostly independent or still have some stuff with you.:001_smile:

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Personality, age, maturity, and a little bit of skill-set play into it.

My 9yo suddenly started showing independent work skills. As long as you don't interrupt her, give her quiet, leave her alone, and give her materials and a checklist, she's ready to go upon waking. It wasn't always like this - 8 and younger, she preferred me sitting next to her as a quiet presence, pointing to the next problem to keep her on track. The 7yo is going through a real tough "I don't want to" stage, and she's imaginative and daydreamy on top of it all, so I'm not sure if I'll have an independent worker by age 9! She definitely needs me to sit next to her and point to the next thing and keep her on task. *I* need the checklist so that I can keep myself on task, and then keep her on task. It's quite an undertaking. But I hope to work with her more this year (she'll be 8 soon) on developing that skillset.

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At 8, she wanted me to sit with her for everything (it was also our first year homeschooling).

 

At 9, she still liked me to but was willing to do some independent work while I was back and forth doing other things. I'm hoping this fall, at 10, she'll be even more willing to work independently, as I'm going to start my little one on K this year.

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It depends on which dc it is and how they learn. My eldest was independent from the start (she was 8) because she learns well by reading, was very challenging at that age, and because that's what she wanted. I made sure she did the work, of course.

 

My middle one took a bit longer, and gradually began working independently in different subjects. Now she does almost everything that way and is my best worker most of the time.

 

My ds, 10, does the least amount independently for this age due to his learning style. I'm not sure if and when he'll become a fully independent learner.

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When people say independently, do they mean working independently or learning independently? I pretty much cover all new materials with ds9 and ds7. DS9 does Life of Fred as a supplement for the purpose of teaching him to learn alone.

 

DS9 and DS7 both try to do grammar, vocab, spelling and math independently unless it's a new topic (i.e. grammar and math).

 

I teach science and history...very little work is independent. Reading is also discussions therefore rarely independent work. WWE requires a teacher but in transitioning ds9 to IEW, he does more of it on his own.

 

That said, DS9 has more trouble working independently than ds7. He has some attention issues and I find that a cup of tea in the morning helps get him going. A checklist, carefully ordered subjects and attention to his preferences for curriculum also help. On the other hand, ds7 can reach across the table and help ds5, get his work done without error and still be done well before ds9. Part of it is just inborn personality/learning issues.

 

Brownie

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When people say independently, do they mean working independently or learning independently? I pretty much cover all new materials with ds9 and ds7. DS9 does Life of Fred as a supplement for the purpose of teaching him to learn alone.

 

Brownie

 

 

I meant both, but you have raised a good question, and I'll add to what I answered.

 

My ds started working independently around 8-9. He's a reluctant scholar. He's begun to learn independently more in the past year, although with some math he's done that on his own. He still needs help learning new math concepts, new levels of many math concepts and anything in English (he doesn't like English, though.) Ideally for him, I'd teach him everything, but we don't live in an ideal world and he does have to gradually learn to learn more on his own even if he never does as much as his sisters do.

 

My eldest was learning most things on her own starting at 8, but my middle one took longer. I can't say for sure when she made the transition and, believe it or not, she's not ignored as the middle dd. It's a lot easier to remember my eldest's because it was right when we started homeschooling.

 

That said, when it comes to anything to do with airplanes, he's been learning independently longer because he has a strong interest in it.

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I was answering in terms of my being able to give an assignment and trust that it will get done - not that he'll understand new concepts without interaction. Of course there are things he ends up learning on his own, but I'm always available. We discuss new things, or he has a class/ co-op group, and then there's plenty of unscheduled discussion. And when he does learn something that I'm not involved in, I still like to hear about it.

 

But if he has "homework" to finish -- practice problems, or reading/ research, or a writing assignment -- I don't have to sit there saying "Okay did you finish that part? Now what comes next?" And if I ask him to have X done before lunch, I can trust that either it will be or he'll have asked for help well before the deadline if he can't manage it.

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My 7yo can't handle working independently at all, and shows no signs of gearing up for it.

My 8yo can handle working independently *sometimes, and is beginning to take more and more responsibility.

My stb12yo can handle working independently *most times, but if I don't check in now and then, he'll really try to pull one over on me.

 

In our house, it seems to be more about the individual child than age.

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My oldest (girl), 7, I think she will need help with that up until 20 or so. She is so scattered brain makes me go insane.

My next one (boy), almost 5 does not want to get down from his seat until he finishes whatever he started (coloring page, logic game, drawing, mazes, or whatever).

The other don't know yet. I am still trying to handle lots of things while sitiing down by my oldest, or keep checking in with her every 2 minutes.

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When people say independently, do they mean working independently or learning independently?

 

 

I mean working. I expect to give instruction and be available for questions, but I would like to be able to leave him with a math page and have him continue his work while I do something like prepare lunch. At this point he can't manage to get through more then one problem if I leave the room.:glare:

 

It sounds like 5th grade is a good goal for us to reach. I'm glad I asked it will help with my patients this year!:D

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My 8 year old boy has had a lot of problems staying on task. I think the feedback he got from his teacher last year made it worse, one of the reasons he is staying home with me now. I talked to a counselor about it, and she told me that independent work is something to be taught, and that a lot of times we expect too much out of kids. One of her big frustrations is that teachers now will not remind kids to empty their homework folders. Even if the kid does there homework, puts it in the folder and takes it to school, they don't always remember to turn it in, then it is marked as late and the child is made to feel bad (again, our problem last year)

 

So, I talked with my son and told him that he is not a forgetful person, he just has not been taught independence at a good rate. Every night I right a list for him on the white board, and I put a small amount of work in his daily work folder, with notes on it. I put this on the school table. My husband reminds him after breakfast that he needs to do his work. If he gets his work done by 9am he earns half an hour of screen time (computor, ds, or tv)

 

So far it is working, and he is feeling better about himself too. In another month or so, I will add one more thing, and just keep doing that at a pace that he can handle.

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For ds14, He works mostly independent, but will still try to skip or do minimum if writing is involved. Dd10 has wanted to work alone from day 1, she even wanted to learn how to read without help. Now she works off a checklist, math from a dvd, only calls me if she has a question. Ds9 can work from a checklist since we've been doing it that way, but is inclined to talk or wander off if I leave the room. Ds4 still doesn't believe that schooling involves him in any way, shape or form, but likes to scribble in workbooks and be read to (sneak learning). He tries his best to distract the others.

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I mean working. I expect to give instruction and be available for questions, but I would like to be able to leave him with a math page and have him continue his work while I do something like prepare lunch. At this point he can't manage to get through more then one problem if I leave the room.:glare:

 

It sounds like 5th grade is a good goal for us to reach. I'm glad I asked it will help with my patients this year!:D

 

We started in this direction by things like "I am going to the bathroom. I expect the next 2 problems to be completed when I get back." "I am going to change a diaper. Have a complete sentence written on the paper when I get back." When they can do that, add more. Work up to the full page. The oldest is usually the hardest, the others get used to seeing him/her doing it and know what to expect.

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I think it depends on the child and the curricula. I started my ds this past January with CLE LA and Math. He quickly got to where he could do the review sections completely independently. He was 6 at the time. The review sections are the bulk of the actual work, too.

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Personality, age, maturity, and a little bit of skill-set play into it.

 

:iagree: Dd12 was working independently at age 7 because I didn't have time to do school with her so long and she just didn't stop! She was personally motivated and I guess that can make a big difference. It slacked off when she neared her 12th birthday. There are just so many other things she would rather be doing. So I need to nudge her to get started but she does nearly all her work independently now. I'm lucky if I can read history with her. Some days she chooses to use her ipod (Joy Hakim series).

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Can I just recommend the Peace Hill Press MP3 "Teaching Students to Work Independently" ?

 

I thought it was very good. And I realized I had been expecting a little too much too soon. Very reassuring to think about the long term, too.

 

Thanks, I'll check that out.

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DD9 has been independent since 1st grade and has taught herself most things, including math a lot of the time. I'll stop her and quiz her to make sure she understands concepts and she does.

 

DD8 isn't independent at all. I can expect that if I walk away for more than a second while he's working, he will have done nothing. He is better now than he was a year ago, and I hope to continue to make improvements.

 

DD6 will work independently if it's something she likes.

 

DD5 is just getting started, and obviously is too young to be expected to do much independently, but her personality is very people-oriented. I have a feeling when she gets older she'll want to do pretty much everything with someone whether she needs to or not.

 

It's all about personality, I think, and about how engaged kids are in what they're learning.

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By 9yo, my oldest wanted to go to her room to work on her stuff away from the noise of her younger sisters (6.5yo and 4yo).

 

My 9yo, my middle dd wanted to go to her room to work on her stuff away from the noise of her younger sister (6.5yo).

 

My oldest is a daydreamer, but she does eventually get everything done. She tends to do as little as she thinks she can get away with.

 

My middle is a diligent worker who goes far above and beyond what I expect of her and still worries that she isn't doing enough. She starts working and keeps working until she is done to her satisfaction (and she's a much harder taskmaster for herself than I am for her). She's a great independent worker.

 

My youngest doesn't do much of anything on her own. She wants me with her in the same room, but doesn't want me to actually look at what she's doing while she's doing it.

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I mean working. I expect to give instruction and be available for questions, but I would like to be able to leave him with a math page and have him continue his work while I do something like prepare lunch. At this point he can't manage to get through more then one problem if I leave the room.

 

Under this definition, DD is already working independently sometimes. In her workbooks, I can tell her what to do and walk away, knowing that she'll get it finished. In fact we often will sit side by side with me working on my homework or reading for class, leaning over to read directions to her. Before explaining the next page I'll look over what she's done so far to make sure she is getting it right.

 

This is our of necessity for us though, since I have work of my own to finish. I'm lucky that DD enjoys learning, picks up new information pretty quickly, and is very motivated to "do school" like Mommy. :D

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I can trust that either it will be or he'll have asked for help well before the deadline if he can't manage it.

 

 

Well, in that case, my eldest still hasn't made it. She doesn't ask for help well before the deadline. This isn't just because she's 15, either--she's never been one to ask for help in time.

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My oldest ds will be 10 in Dec. He is pretty independant. When I think about it, I could probably go a step further with him now and make a schedule that he can check off when finished.

 

My 7 y/o ds...no way. I don't expect him to be for a really long time. He has Asperger's, so we have many challenges that we deal with in and out of school time.

 

I guess, it really depends on the child rather than a set age. My oldest is mature for his age and always has been. In fact, there's been many times I have to remind my self of his true age and keep that in my head, lol.

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I think a lot depends on the child.

 

My oldest worked independently from a pretty early age, partly out of necessity, because I had a toddler and 2 week old baby when we started homeschooling. She started K as a solid reader, which helped, and she's a very independent personality anyway. (Maybe it's an oldest child thing...)

 

My 12yo daughter struggles with ADD and still needs me to keep her on task. She can work independently, but needs oversight.

 

My 9yo works well independently. Most of the time, he has half his schoolwork done before anyone else is even awake.

 

My 4.5yo has special needs so it might be a good many years before he can function independently at all.

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According to Marcia Summersville (sp?) of TOG, 3rd through 6th grade are the golden years of independence. 7th onward, mom needs to become more involved again due to the difficulty level of their courses. I've found it to be so with my sons. My oldest is 13 and is independent for most of his classes still, but his literature and history works involve great conversations with mom - I love these! And his math requires conversation sometimes too. My side of the conversation usually looks something like, "Gee, it's been 20 years, let me read your book and get back to you."

 

I made the mistake of making copywork an independent work with my oldest and we are paying for it now. If you can keep this one a one-on-one assignment when they are younger, I think you'll prevent handwriting and grammar slip-ups down the road. Copywork works great for the younger years with mom there to quickly erase errors before they form an imprint on eyes or muscle memory. By 3rd grade, dictation can replace copywork with mom still there to oversee. Spelling, grammar, penmanship....all of it gets covered in a great natural way. But I still use a spelling and grammar program

 

I'm getting off topic. :D

 

The #1 aid to independent work I've found is through workboxes or a variation thereof. Mine have said that having hand-written notes and instructions from mom are like having mom right beside them all day with their schoolwork. I thought that was funny because my notes were just things like, "Grammar Ch. 5, pgs 37-38. Ex. A & B, the evens." Nothing personal or mushy usually. I was in a hurry. :)

 

For 3rd through 6th, dictation, history, and spelling were about our only joint family subjects. Everything else was independent.

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