Weird Christian stuff.

[ThatCyndiGirl]

My DH has already nixed daddy/daughter dances, purity ceremonies where he has to present them with rings or whatever, and generally anything that makes him a weird, "Prince Charming" for his daughters. I tend to agree. He's my Prince Charming, not theirs.

 

ETA - He HAS danced with his daughters for fun. Fast, goofy, rockin fun. It's the slow, romantic weird stuff he doesn't like. He only dances like that with me. :)

 

:iagree: This is what I meant. If your dd and dh like to slow dance together, then have at it. But, it's the whole "let's make it public and make it look almost like a date and have them slow dance together" thing just seems weird and contrived.

 

I did not say nor imply that "any father who slow dances with his daughter must be some sick pervert". NOT AT ALL! The dancing is not even the point, the point was about the whole "pledge your virginity to me with this ring I thee find Pure" that is gross. And, as a pp pointed out, that culture seems to have no such requirement for sons pledging their virginity to their mothers. (equally gross and weird, imo! Hello, Dr. Freud!)

[MorganClassicalPrep]

I'm sorry (very deeply sorry) that there are girls who do not have their fathers with them. My dad was a long distance truck driver and while I know that does not compare to having lost him to death, jerkiness or war, I still went without him much of the time. While I missed my dad desparately when watching others enjoying father/daughter things, I never begrudged the girls who HAD their fathers there.

 

I really can't understand the idea that because some go without everyone should go without. On the one hand, we have people that flip over some kids getting cheese sandwiches, because other kids had food fights. Now, we have girls who have fathers and they aren't allowed to do or participate in something special with their fathers, because some girls don't have their fathers there? How does that make sense?!?

 

 

 

Yes, in this setting, everyone should go without because some go without. I just can't imagine how my 4 year old would feel after working hard all year and dancing in her recital, to then watch everyone (or mostly everyone) else in her class get back up on stage and dance again, this time with daddy. That would just be... crushing I'm sure.

 

If this were a special event, JUST a father daughter dance, that would be different. The children without fathers could just not go. I would never take my daughter to an event labelled "father daughter", but as I said before, this is not something I would expect from a dance studio. The girls who have fathers can do all the father daughter stuff they want, I don't begrudge them that, but don't make the other girls sit there and watch!

 

It makes complete sense because these are CHILDREN we are talking about. Children who have worked just as hard as all the other girls in the class, and will see this as some sort of punishment for not having a daddy as they watch the rest of their classmates get up there on stage. Frankly, I find it a little cold that you would even say that is okay.

[at the beach]

yes! Me too!

 

And sorry - yes it's a Christian dance studio and that's the cause for the title.

 

 

 

Neither side of our families have ever done that either.

 

I have not read all the posts. I have also never heard of Christian dance studios until reading about them on this board. My daughters have attended local father/daughter community Valentine dances when they were 10 and under and I didn't have any concern about that. ETA: It is not the dance itself with dad that I find odd, but in this case, it is something about the spectacle of it, including the giving of the rose that feels off to me.

 

What you describe feels vaguely similar to the whole thing about fathers giving their daughters purity rings/talks/dinners one on one, which I also find weird at best. There was a post on this board a few days ago about a dad announcing at his daughter's wedding that the kiss btw bride and groom would be his daughter's first.:001_huh: IMO weird and inappropriate. Why on earth should that be public knowledge? To me, it makes the viewing of that alleged first kiss oddly provocative. Something about this where the father is intimately involved in these areas of his daughter's life feels off to me. It feels sickly sweet to me. JMO and I'm saying it. :tongue_smilie:

Edited June 19, 2010 by Violet

[lionfamily1999]

Yes, in this setting, everyone should go without because some go without. I just can't imagine how my 4 year old would feel after working hard all year and dancing in her recital, to then watch everyone (or mostly everyone) else in her class get back up on stage and dance again, this time with daddy. That would just be... crushing I'm sure.

 

If this were a special event, JUST a father daughter dance, that would be different. The children without fathers could just not go. I would never take my daughter to an event labelled "father daughter", but as I said before, this is not something I would expect from a dance studio. The girls who have fathers can do all the father daughter stuff they want, I don't begrudge them that, but don't make the other girls sit there and watch!

 

It makes complete sense because these are CHILDREN we are talking about. Children who have worked just as hard as all the other girls in the class, and will see this as some sort of punishment for not having a daddy as they watch the rest of their classmates get up there on stage. Frankly, I find it a little cold that you would even say that is okay.

I'm sorry, but I disagree. I've been there, as I said, my dad wasn't available most of the time. It didn't hurt me to see dads with their daughters. While I missed my dad a great deal when I saw other fathers showing up and taking part, and part of me was envying the girls who got to do these things, it did not have a bad impact on me. I learned that there are fathers who are there, that those fathers are just as important.

 

I don't believe that hiding or not allowing this sort of thing is helpful. Seeing other fathers actively involved has helped me to understand how an ideal father daughter relationship would be.

 

Now, my dh is there and he does all this stuff and he does it with a proud, but goofy grin on his face, because HIS father wasn't there. He didn't begrudge his friends their fathers either. Sure, he built up a great deal of resentment towards the man that chose not to be there for him, but again it did not have a negative impact. It helped him to be the type of father he always wanted, but didn't have.

 

I think it's wonderful that kids who have their parents there can participate in these sorts of things.

[MissKNG]

I think it's just to honor Father's Day and who says the rose has to be red? White doesn't mean romance. And I slow danced with my dad before and that certainly didn't reflect romance!

[annandatje]

Since I had never heard of a Christian dance studio before joining this board, I am curious about what makes a dance studio Christian?

 

Do the instructors and students have to be Christian?

 

I have never heard of Jewish, Muslim, B'hai, etc dance school. Irish dance schools, of course, teach ethnic Irish dance.

 

But I don't think there is such a thing as ethnic Christian dance" is there?

[angela in ohio]

Since I had never heard of a Christian dance studio before joining this board, I am curious about what makes a dance studio Christian?

 

Do the instructors and students have to be Christian?

 

I have never heard of Jewish, Muslim, B'hai, etc dance school. Irish dance schools, of course, teach ethnic Irish dance.

 

But I don't think there is such a thing as ethnic Christian dance" is there?

 

Usually the owners are Christians and the school is run on Christian principles. This would probably mostly affect the choice of music and the costumes. Some may only accept Christian students, I suppose, but most I have heard of will accept anyone, as long as they are willing to be respectful of the Christian faith. Teachers are usually Christians, though.

 

I went to a Christian dance studio when I was growing up, though it was a small town and it was just the regular dance studio. :D That was your only choice. We prayed before recitals and danced to Christian songs.

 

In the larger city near us, there are religion- or culture-specific dance studios, though I don't know of a Christian one. There is a Buddhist dance studio, the Irish dance of course, etc.

Edited June 19, 2010 by angela in ohio

[Murphy101]

I hear you, but she said they were asked to have a dance for Father's Day. Later in her post she seemed to be assuming that meant slow dance, and others assumed that meant a romantic slow dance.

 

I guess I was trying to point out that most "dance with your father" is not a romantic slow dance.

 

I agree. Slow does not equal romantic anymore than fast means not romantic.

 

I think it's sad that there is so much abuse in our world that a father and daughter cannot dance without the worry that their touching could be considered intimate in any fashion. :001_huh: Hopefully I misunderstood this thread.

 

I am not concerned about intimate.

I simply find it - weird for lack of a better word. Contrived was a good word too.

 

If it's simply something about the daughter not wanting to have any kind of spotlight, then I find it a bit weird she's in a dance recital.

 

Of course all girls who like to dance are little prima donas - right?:001_huh:

 

Maybe my dd just enjoys dancing and would be just as happy never doing it on a stage? Just a thought. Many people love playing music too, but they don't care about being in a band on stage. Obviously she is willing to tolorate a spotlight to do her class performance, that doesn't mean that she necessarily likes the spotlight.

 

:iagree: This is what I meant. If your dd and dh like to slow dance together, then have at it. But, it's the whole "let's make it public and make it look almost like a date and have them slow dance together" thing just seems weird and contrived.

 

I did not say nor imply that "any father who slow dances with his daughter must be some sick pervert". NOT AT ALL! The dancing is not even the point,

 

Yes. The set up just seems - odd, contrived, weird I don't know what word to convey why I'm not in the "how sweet" camp.:001_unsure:

 

Since I had never heard of a Christian dance studio before joining this board, I am curious about what makes a dance studio Christian?

 

Do the instructors and students have to be Christian?

 

I have never heard of Jewish, Muslim, B'hai, etc dance school. Irish dance schools, of course, teach ethnic Irish dance.

 

But I don't think there is such a thing as ethnic Christian dance" is there?

 

Actually their is "praise dance" which we sure aren't ever going to sign up for.;)

 

Usually people go to "christian" dance studios because:

 

The music tends to be more acceptable. I doubt you'd find them dancing to Milkshake for example.

 

The moves and costumes tend to be tamer. No butt groving or chest shaking or catsuits with deep V fronts for example. (And yes, I've seen all that at around here before.)

 

Well we left it up to her and she made her choice. Her dad told her it was fine by him either way and if she changed her miind at the last minute, he wouldn't leave her stranded up there with no partner.;)

 

She's getting a huge honking bouquet because her dad and all her brothers will be giving her flowers. She and 2 others in the van will be happily sneezing all the way to get ice cream afterwards and then home.:D

[ThatCyndiGirl]

Martha, that is so sweet about her dad and brothers and the flowers! I love tap! Good luck to your dd on her recital!

[emzhengjiu]

My daughters' last dance studio had a daughter & dad dance at the end of the spring recital. It was beautiful and not at all wierd to me. It made me a bit sad since my girls don't have a dad but watching the other children didn't bother mine at all. Both girls thought it was great.

[zbargainmama]

This is a totally ignorant question but What is a "Christian" dance studio? i have never heard of something like that. Do they just play christian music? Is it a certain type of dancing? I am very curious.

 

Oh and your question about your DD I would leave it up to my daughter too I think that is a individual thing for each child to publicly display affection to her parent like that.

[mcconnellboys]

I only have boys, but I must say I agree. I've never quite understood these things, nor father/daughter "dates". I would certainly never have wanted to be involved in such a thing as I was growing up, no matter how close I might have been to my father....

[Laurie4b]

I think the daddy-daughter dance thing is perfectly normal and lovely. But if it's weird to you and your dd doesn't want to participate, she shouldn't have to.

[Murphy101]

Well nevermind the dance issue.

An hour later I'm still going :blink: after they played an annoucement prior to the finale performance.

 

The annoucement: Open your heart to Christ. Confess your sins and profess love of Him and accept Him as your Savior. Blahblah....

 

The final following that: a grease lightning medley

 

I'm torn between :lol: at how not appropriate that transition was and :blink:

 

My girls tapped great and had a grand time and is sleeping amidst 3 vases worth of flowers in her ice cream smeared costume. I change my mind. I'm not torn. It's all :001_wub:

[Smithie]

:lol: at the Tent-Revival-to-Greased-Lightening transition.

 

"Am I the only one who thinks this stuff is weird? Flowers and slow dancing is not stuff I associate with df/dd relationships. And my girls are very much daddy girls."

 

You are not the only one. There is something really energetically ick about a father doing "date stuff" with one of his daughters. Flowers on her birthday? A spotlight dance at her wedding? Not date stuff. Handing her a single rose as he leads her out on onto the floor to dance with a crowd of other couples? Date stuff.

 

But really, compared with what it might have been, a rose and a dance is tame. They could have asked all the dads to pray over their daughters and give them a Guardian of Purity necklace. You got off easy. ;)

[LG Gone Wild]

:lol: at the Tent-Revival-to-Greased-Lightening transition.

 

"Am I the only one who thinks this stuff is weird? Flowers and slow dancing is not stuff I associate with df/dd relationships. And my girls are very much daddy girls."

 

You are not the only one. There is something really energetically ick about a father doing "date stuff" with one of his daughters. Flowers on her birthday? A spotlight dance at her wedding? Not date stuff. Handing her a single rose as he leads her out on onto the floor to dance with a crowd of other couples? Date stuff.

 

But really, compared with what it might have been, a rose and a dance is tame. They could have asked all the dads to pray over their daughters and give them a Guardian of Purity necklace. You got off easy. ;)

 

 

LOL!!! Totally agree.

[coffeefreak]

Well nevermind the dance issue.

An hour later I'm still going :blink: after they played an annoucement prior to the finale performance.

 

The annoucement: Open your heart to Christ. Confess your sins and profess love of Him and accept Him as your Savior. Blahblah....

 

The final following that: a grease lightning medley

 

I'm torn between :lol: at how not appropriate that transition was and :blink:

 

My girls tapped great and had a grand time and is sleeping amidst 3 vases worth of flowers in her ice cream smeared costume. I change my mind. I'm not torn. It's all :001_wub:

 

:lol: