My kids have lost their belief in Santa, they confessed

[melmichigan]

Three of my five kids confessed to my DH that Santa isn't real and we give them gifts. I'm actually surprised it has taken this long, to confess I mean. I'm pretty sure they have known this for years... I wonder if they thought they wouldn't get gifts. :D They are ten and seven. I'm not sure with the four year old, and the two year old could care less who is bringing presents. :lol:

[Blueridge]

I grew up with Santa. Christmas was all about the stuff. We were not even very thankful (I'm not meaning that all kids aren't appreciative, but we weren't). We would unwrap tons of presents on Christmas Eve, and then race to the tree in the morning to expect tons of big stuff from Santa. Really, it must have been financial madness for my parents. ;) I expected to do the same for our children. I remember feeling sad when our oldest found out, at age 7. We were sitting in a church service, visiting a new place, and the brilliant pastor made quite a stink about 'how he couldn't believe that there were parents who taught their children such lies'. :glare: I could have cried. She did. There was a lot of explaining to do...We never did Santa after that, but just emphasized the joy and happiness of having Christmas as a family, and getting presents for each other because we love them. It's been lovely. And my family has been able to keep Christ in the center of our holiday, instead of the stuff. We are all tremendously thankful.

[Amber in AUS]

My BIL & SIL have an 'if you don't believe, you don't receive' policy and their 17 and 14 year olds still get gifts from Santa obviously they know the real story. It is nice to get a suprise on Christmas Day. My sisters and i all received gifts from Santa until we were 18 then Santa stopped coming because he doesn't gift adults ;)

[Margo out of lurking]

Three of my five kids confessed to my DH that Santa isn't real and we give them gifts. I'm actually surprised it has taken this long, to confess I mean. I'm pretty sure they have known this for years... I wonder if they thought they wouldn't get gifts. :D They are ten and seven. I'm not sure with the four year old, and the two year old could care less who is bringing presents. :lol:

 

Ah, rite of passage--for the parents too! My dd figured out the tooth fairy first and then realized what that meant. We finally told me ds two years ago. He was crushed. "You're not Santa Claus! You're Santa FRAUDS!" Sigh. Poor kid.

 

It definitely took the pressure off dh and me--no more making sure the Santa presents were NEVER found early, no more special wrapping paper just from Santa, no more worrying about making the handwriting different... And my ds at least liked that he could go to sleep on Christmas Eve and no longer be absolutely terrified that a stranger would be coming into his house in the middle of the night.

[Danestress]

We finally told me ds two years ago. He was crushed. "You're not Santa Claus! You're Santa FRAUDS!" Sigh. Poor kid.

 

 

 

I'm seeing Elf scream, "You are sitting on your throne of lies." lol. I know it's not funny to some parents.

 

My son announced at 3 years old that he 'needed' the truth. He's like that - he has to really know about things - death, Santa, taxes. So I told him the truth, and he was grateful. It did take some pressure off.

[EarleneW]

I will never confess! Santa only brings 3 gifts to our house, but I love it. My kids know what Christmas is really about and we talk about all that too, but I will cry when Santa is gone at our house!

[JFSinIL]

I well remember years ago when one of my twin took me aside to the upstairs bathroom to quietly tell me he had figured it out. He agreed to keep the secret for the younger girls...and his fraternal twin with autism. I think he felt more grown-up knowing the secret, too.

 

Now the girls also have been in the know for years - and all three kids are still posting Santa list on the 'fridge and keeping the secret as SillyAutismBoy, 18 and six feet tall, STILL BELIEVES!!! He even sat on (poor, crushed) Santa's lap, too on a recent trip into Chicago. And when Santa made a quick stop at the end of Joe's school Christmas show Joe BEAMED.

 

It is useful, and the other kids use it as much as I do, to say "Santa is watching" around the house if Joe gets crabby or starts doing something he shouldn't. I will someday have a 40-year-old man here believing in Santa.

 

Now, the Easter bunny even Joe figured out. ;)

[Nestof3]

We never told our children there was a Santa. We've never wrapped presents in his name. We always wanted our kids to know that their gifts came from us -- people who actually love them.

 

One year, my Dad dressed up as Santa, one year my husband, and one year our neighbor's grandson -- they all visited on Christmas Eve during our party. Watching the videos, it's funny to hear one of the kids say, "He those are Grandpa's shoes" or "That's Dad's voice."

 

If the kids asked us if he was real, we would just ask them what they thought. The other day, Ben was on my bed and asked, "Mom, do you believe in Santa?" I said, "No. But, it can still be a fun thing." He said, "Me neither."

[lynn]

I always let the kids take or leave what they wanted. The older kids play along with the santa thing for the younger kids. the 9 year old is somewhere in between not quite wanting to not believe just yet but he keeps it going for my 4 year old. No push to believe one way or another. They are happy, content and love Christmas as much as I do for I love making it as special and memorable as I can with the decor, music, food, etc.

[melmichigan]

Santa has always brought each child one or two gifts, the others have always been from us. We never make a big thing by changing the handwriting or hiding the wrapping paper so we don't hide it in any way. We watch the Christmas specials about the true meaning of Christmas and the original Kris Kringle so we let them figure it out.

 

We will still have Santa, jeez, he's been bringing my DH's underwear and socks every year since he was old enough to wear them. :D It's just a passing like everyone mentioned. We still love Christmas. I think the give away this year was the many discussions about the family and the importance of family vs. gifts. Like many we are struggling more this year and we talked about how they wouldn't get "everything" but needed to be happy for the things they do receive. We have stressed time together as a family, and our health, especially with DH's grandmother struggling. in ICU all month. I think that really turned the table on the "unlimited resources" of the commercialized Santa at the North Pole with his unlimited elves, so they were comfortable spilling the beans to their Dad. :)

[Tree House Academy]

I got "Santa" gifts long after I stopped believing. My mom would set just a few special items out on Christmas Eve night as a big surprise the next morning. It never got old and I always loved it! I will do the same for my kids.

[LibraryLover]

my post was all underlined wonky. i edited. Anyway- Here gifts in stockings are traditional and Santa is not needed.

Edited December 20, 2009 by LibraryLover

[melissel]

I'm seeing Elf scream, "You are sitting on your throne of lies." lol.

 

:lol::lol::lol: I just saw that last night, so funny.

 

My DD7 was very persistent about asking last year...VERY persistent :glare: I could tell she didn't really want to know just yet, so I kept giving evasive answers. Finally, when she asked one last time, I flat out said, "OK, do you REALLY want the truth?" She opened her mouth, closed it, thought for a minute and said, "No, don't tell me." She's asked once or twice this year, but she seems to really seem to still believe. Denial ain't just a river in Egypt :lol:

[AndyJoy]

We never did Santa when I was growing up, but we did pretend that there was a Tooth Fairy, though I never really believed it. When I was 7, my tooth was under my pillow 2 nights in a row because my mom forgot. The third night, she remembered, because I put a Post-it note on her mirror that read, "I sure hope the Tooth Fairy remembers tonight!" She got a good laugh out of that.

[melmichigan]

The tooth fairy has never been to my house. My science minded kids are keeping theirs, eeewww. :lol:

[lakotajm]

I was just going to post a thread about how things are growing toward a Santa-less Christmas in our house, and I honestly miss him! My oldest dd figured it out when she was 10, while watching Miracle on 34th Street (warning). She cried, sobbed for nearly a half hour and was very sad and angry with me for awhile. She felt I had played her for a fool, I think. But she was also sad it wasn't real. I think it helped when I explained the historical background-the real Santa, and asked her to keep the secret for her two younger sisters. But then, probably starting last year, it just didn't feel right to keep pretending even with the younger ones. I think I started to feel the big guy was upstaging Jesus and it irritated me.

 

I also wanted them to appreciate the beauty of the real Saint Nicholaus, and appreciate how we give gifts to remember both the Christ child and S.N.; to carry on his generous spirit. So dd6 now asks about it, but seems ambivalent. She knows the story of S.N. and will tell it and tell people "Santa's dead" (now there's a real ice breaker for a Christmas party!) But she also says she wants to believe there is a guy who magically travels the world in a sleigh handing out presents on Christmas Eve. So I just asked her, "Do you like believing it, is it important to you?" She said yes, so I said, "I liked to believe it when I was a kid, even after I knew the real story, so if you want to, just believe it all you want-it is fun! Besides, how can I say it is impossible, if all things are possible with God?"

dd4 listens in, occasionally chimes in, but really seems unfazed by it one way or the other. She could care less, it seems!

I was going to ask those who are Santa-less if making the switch (if you switched) has made the holiday more or less fun, and more or less meaningful?

I am going to say it is more meaningful, but less fun.

 

Lakota

[nd293]

We don't do Santa. As a child, I remember being disappointed that I had been lied to, feeling a little stupid for ever believing. I don't like the inequality of the Santa idea. What really sealed the deal for me was seeing an interview in the newspaper with South African kids attending a preschool in a well-off area. Most of the kids from wealthy families, and expecting the latest popular (and expensive) toy from santa. Other kids were obviously at the school because their families sacrificed hugely - they were hoping santa would bring them a soccer ball or a doll. If you're well off and your kids get a car for Christmas, and I'm not and mine get a generic brand MP3 player - fine. I can live with that. I can't live with kids thinking some "independent" old guy from the North Pole treats kids differently!

 

But that's just a little rant ;-) If we see something the kids want / need, they get a santa gift. Otherwise I just prep dd and tell her to nominate a gift as "from santa" in case other kids ask what she got. Worked fine for the past 9 years!