Homemaking for Dummies

[susie in tx]

Does such a thing exist? Once again, I'm completely overwhelmed with my house. I've lost two very important things - a check from our insurance company and the baby's social security card. I spent the day hunting for them and I cannot find them. I *did* find the Loom, MapAids, and other misc. TOG CD's that I really needed.

 

I don't have a system for paper and how it's handled. I don't have a system for paying bills. Motivated Moms was helpful, but the clutter before I actually get to the cleaning is what I really need to work on. I feel like I'm missing some sort of gene that tells me how to keep our home from looking like a complete disaster area. We do have 5 kids and we are home a lot, but our home should look more like a home and less like a dump. I have MOTH and it was helpful as well, but all of these books assume that I know something about how to run and manage a home. I don't have a system and I think that is a big part of the problem.

 

Suggestions? I've had friends come and help out periodically. One cleaned out my pantry and we kept up with that for a very long time until her categories quit making sense. I don't want to raise my girls to be slobs like their parents.

 

What do you all do? Do you have some sort of planner that helps you to know how to keep up with all of this stuff? I'd really like to get my schoolyear more prepared, but I think I need to do an intervention on my house first.

[i.love.lucy]

I can tell you that yelling at your kids to "clean up this mess like I have shown you so many times how to do!!!!" ........doesn't work.

 

And I only have 2 kids.:blink:

 

I shall be watching for answers that will solve both our problems.:lurk5:

[OrganicAnn]

First designate a place for important mail/bills/papers that need paid/action. Make it easy to remember. Make it easily accessible for you. Put things you might need together (stamps/envelops/phone numbers etc).

 

Second spend 15 minutes every day working on the clutter.

 

Some find Flylady helpful. I like her ideas, but not the emails.

 

Her concept of working on your 'hotspots' the places where things accumulate. Tackle them often.

[LUV2EDU]

Does such a thing exist? Once again, I'm completely overwhelmed with my house. I've lost two very important things - a check from our insurance company and the baby's social security card. I spent the day hunting for them and I cannot find them. I *did* find the Loom, MapAids, and other misc. TOG CD's that I really needed.

 

I don't have a system for paper and how it's handled. I don't have a system for paying bills. Motivated Moms was helpful, but the clutter before I actually get to the cleaning is what I really need to work on. I feel like I'm missing some sort of gene that tells me how to keep our home from looking like a complete disaster area. We do have 5 kids and we are home a lot, but our home should look more like a home and less like a dump. I have MOTH and it was helpful as well, but all of these books assume that I know something about how to run and manage a home. I don't have a system and I think that is a big part of the problem.

 

Suggestions? I've had friends come and help out periodically. One cleaned out my pantry and we kept up with that for a very long time until her categories quit making sense. I don't want to raise my girls to be slobs like their parents.

 

What do you all do? Do you have some sort of planner that helps you to know how to keep up with all of this stuff? I'd really like to get my schoolyear more prepared, but I think I need to do an intervention on my house first.

 

 

http://home.howstuffworks.com/how-to-organize-your-household-papers.htm

Edited July 8, 2009 by LUV2EDU

[WTMCassandra]

One book: Organizing from the Inside Out

 

Your systems have to be designed especially for you, for how YOU work. It should be YOUR categories in the pantry, not your friend's.

 

I can tell you how I do a couple of things to help spark ideas, but short of coming to your house and spending time with you, I don't know how YOU work. Julie Morgenstern's book will help you figure this out.

 

Bill-paying: We pay bills when we get paid. We used to get paid every two weeks--on payday I would pay the bills I had on hand, every two weeks. Now it's once a month, so it's different. As the bills come in, they are put in one place. In our home it's an old napkin holder. They also have little organizers that are numbered 1-31, so you could file it according to the date it's due. My husband sometimes uses ours (it sits next to the old napkin holder). Right there we have stamps and envelopes, as well as new checks. We pay the bill and put it in the file pile (also right there). Every couple of months I go through the file pile and file bills in the drawer (also right there--seeing a theme? ; ) ). I have general categories like "phone," "electricity," and "trash" because I got tired of changing the file folders to accompany different company names. Every January I shred last year's bills. (Some people don't even keep them anymore with so many electronic records--I'm kind of slow to adapting in this area. I like to hang on to mine for a while to make any discrepancy easier to research.)

 

Vital documents: I keep SS cards and important documents either in the freezer (in a binder) or in the safe deposit box. Always. I have a file on my PDA that has the numbers (password access) so I don't have to carry the cards around. I also have a list on my computer of what is in the safe deposit box and in the freezer.

 

Checks: If I get a check I need to deposit locally, I IMMEDIATELY put it in my wallet and treat it as cash. If I need to mail it to my USAA bank account, I put it in an envelope right away and put it in the mailbox. I basically don't put it down and give myself a chance to lose it.

 

Things Coming In and Out: I have a library basket where library books live. The children know that they are either actively reading the book or it is in the basket--no other choices! I have a designated spot where we put things the night before errand/town day. When we arrive home from somewhere, we empty out the car right away and put away things first, before we do anything else.

 

I guess this makes me sound like some kind of neat Nazi, but really, they are routines built into our day that we rarely have to think about.

 

I think you should tackle ONE area and decide what routine works best for you, and implement just that one thing for a month. Then, if that's going smoothly, try another.

 

I hope this helps a little. I would be glad to try to give you a few ideas if you can post more examples of the types of clutter you face. For example, I have a little basket where I keep all school-related CDs. This helps me find them quickly when I need them.

 

Blessings to you!

[SherryTX]

I am a huge fan of having most of my bills available via email or online ONLY. I have done this with most of my credit cards and utilities - it was really hard for me to finally do, because I was worried I would forget about the bills if I didn't get them in the mail. However, that isn't really a problem so much any more because I have a spreadsheet with due dates - actually I have one Excel file that has multiple worksheets - one has all the due dates, so I know when to check. And, if necessary you can create reminders for yourself either using email , your cell phone, or just a regular paper planner.

 

I am getting ready to put the rest of the bills that I can to online only soon. I can tell you this has cut down a LOT of paper coming into my house - and I can go online and download statements and if I really need them hard copy can print them out.

 

For statements, bills, etc., I do have a binder that I keep these things in. It works for me.

 

I have a separate binder that I keep important documents in such as insurance policies, social security cards, birth certificates, immunization records, etc...basically things that don't change - or if they do like the insurance policy, won't more than like once a year. This has been a HUGE help to me, as I have lost ss cards and birth certificates in the past. Everything is handy.

 

We do have a file cabinet, but I don't use it that much because of the location of it. I find the binders work well for us.

 

I do have a lot of old papers I have been going through - and have trouble making myself throw things out, but I am getting better at it. I also do my best now to go through the mail as it comes in and trash all junk mail right away.

 

I am still trying to get a handle on things better myself, and I do agree that FlyLady does have some good advice to help out - I don't both with the emails either though.

 

Don't forget to use the tools you probably already have on your computer - even if you don't have MS Office you can get comparable free office software (OpenOffice for example) that can give you a good spreadsheet system - and you can use Outlook to schedule things, etc...and print it out if you like. Or just go with a paper based system.

 

Just don't do what I have done in the past - let the organization planning over whelm you wasting a lot of energy and time. Go with something simple you know you can stick with so that you can get started right away. THAT is the key.

[SherryTX]

One book: Organizing from the Inside Out

 

Your systems have to be designed especially for you, for how YOU work. It should be YOUR categories in the pantry, not your friend's.

 

 

 

I read this book (or most of it) not long after it first came out. I remember thinking it was pretty good, and ended up giving it to my mom.

You make a good point - anytime we try to use some one else's solutions we need to remember to customize them to our own needs. Sometimes you don't know what those customizations will be so you start with theirs, but it is always a work in progress.

 

Even if you find something that works for you NOW - you have to remember to keep in mind that it is an on going process and you may need to change something in the future.

[WTMCassandra]

Yes, online can help. And it cuts down on how many checks/stamps you have to go through--they are expensive. You are absolutely right that you should go with something simple and start right away. It doesn't have to be pretty--it just has to work for you.

[OrganicAnn]

....put away things first, before we do anything else.

 

I think this is a big key to having an organize/clean home. Most of us (who don't ie me) always have an excuse. Something is always more important that putting things away before you do anything else.

[Peela]

Flylady works for me but I adapt it to me and sometimes I dont even do it for months on end- but as soon as I am overwhelmed, I know what to do, how to get back in balance and organised again, one babystep at a time. The thing with Flylady is that it trains you to form habits- simple habits like throwing away junk mail as it comes into the house rather than putting in in a Hot Spot, and decluttering a small bit at a time (like the sock drawer one day).

As far as paperwork goes, I have a filing cabinet for evreything I need to keep. My desk has a calendar and a To Do list on it. I have a pin board above my desk for all bills, and a tray for all pieces of junk mail or other mail I need to either file or read later (most junk mail goes straight in the bin). Its all pretty simple and its very much a system that has evolved over the several years since I joined up with Flylady.

[LaxMom]

This is so interesting to me. Is it a generational thing? I spent years thinking I must be the only person in the world who didn't seem to "get" keeping the house. As it turns out, almost everyone I know has made the same observation: we never learned to keep house for one reason or another (me: my mother was a SAHM who did the household stuff while I was at school or outside playing, my husband: two professional parents and mom working crazy hours, so they had full time help). Before the boys were born, I worked full time, so I did what I could in the evenings or, later, hit or miss during the day working from home. Now, I've been a SAHM for almost 5 years and I still haven't gotten into a good groove... it's disconcerting. I think the biggest hurdle (at least for me and others of our generation) seems to be the expectation that it will be "done" at some point. It's never done.

 

Flylady hasn't worked for me. I think WTMCassandra hit it right on the head: her routines aren't MY routines. They don't make sense to me or, at least, seem to create more work to keep them going in my world, which I take as a sign that it's not the right system for me. I find it much better to simply be in the habit of looking to see what needs to be done, then doing it, whether it's digging out our dining room or making the bed (I usually notice that when I'm getting dressed).

 

The big thing that has kept me from feeling completely overwhelmed is to simply remind myself that it IS possible to have the house decluttered - we've done it numerous times before and always the same way: pick a room and just do it. Sometimes, it takes an hour, sometimes a few days.

 

I like Motivated Moms because there are just a few things we can pick off daily and it reminds me of things I may normall overlook. I can delegate a number of them to the kids (they love!!! to clean the toilets and sweep the stairs), too, which helps them kind of get a grasp on what it takes to run a house.

 

I follow a similar approach to paper as Sherry desribed, exept mine is a file box (just an accordion file with a latching lid and handle). We also have a file cabinet in a location that has essentially guanarteed non-use for the past 8 or so years. I set up reminders for things like the water bill (which I write a paper check for because the town always "doesn't receive" it if the bank sends it...:glare:) on my BlackBerry.

 

I'm learning a lot from an Amish friend who has 7 children and a dairy farm, yet always seems under control and has time to visit. She just does what can be done on any given day and the rest will be there tomorrow, no worries. She doesn't have a lot of idle time (on internet forums for instance, lol) but she has a pretty relaxed pace for the day and even gets naps!

[susie in tx]

You all are so incredibly helpful.

 

Thank you so very much.

 

It sounds like I need to do a couple of things. And, I have some more questions. I'm really glad that I posted here. This is helpful.

 

I have a file cabinet, but most of the stuff in there is just thrown in it. I haven't gone through it in at least 10 years. It's where I keep the important stuff. This is not working for me. LOL It's bulk trash week, so the cabinet is leaving. I really like the idea of a pocket file folder near my desk. There were lots of good ideas on how to manage the bills and I think I will find something here for that. Most of my bills are paid online and I even get the bills through my email. It's the bills that come in the mail that I tend to forget to pay.

 

For a while, I would go through the mail when it came into the house. But then, I just quit because I didn't have a good place for the stuff I wanted to keep. I need to figure something out here. I'm tempted to put it in a basket, but then I probably won't go through the basket. What do you all do with magazines you want to keep and circulars that have coupons in them?

 

As for the social security cards and birth certificates, they need to go into our safe deposit box. Plain and simple.

 

This may seem silly, but how do you know what to keep and what to throw away? I have needed Lands End catalogs in the past because it had a free shipping coupon code on it. But, I never know where the catalog is and then end up spending the $ on the shipping. Or, my dh gets tons of stuff for work. Would another basket help for my dh? Or a file folder? Some of this stuff is important, but I never know if it is or not. I just want to have it in a visible spot so that he knows to look at it.

 

I'm going to see if the library has the book that is recommended and look at flylady again, to see if that is helpful. Honestly, I don't know if something will work until I try it because I can't envision using a system. That's what happened with the pantry. It looked so neat and pretty after it was done, but only parts of it seemed to work for me. But, I didn't follow through and try to make it work for me. I just let everything fall apart. Note to self: force self to follow through.

 

And what about school stuff and coloring pages and the pictures the kids bring home from Synagogue/Church? I have a ton of that stuff. I don't write on any of it, so I honestly have no idea what belongs to whom. But the girls seem to care that I keep it. I've thought about getting a box for each of the girls and having them put important stuff in there, but then what happens when the box gets full? Do things become less important as time goes by?

 

Another huge clutter issue is kid's clothing. I'm more and more tempted to only keep an outfit or two for each size. I seem to go to Target and buy new things regardless of whether or not I already have things that will fit the girls. I do have clear plastic bins with clothes in each size for the girls, but that doesn't seem to be working. For some reason, we get the bins down, go through them, and never put them away. I often get distracted and then it seems like too much work to go through them.

 

I had a professional organizer come one time and look at my house, but I could tell that even she was overwhelmed. I didn't invite her back, and I would rather not spend the money. I don't even know that we have the kind of money it would take.

[JudoMom]

For me, it all started to make sense when I stopped trying to do things like my mother, and instead starting thinking about how to do things so they worked for my family. That, and following Flylady's advice that I could do anything for 15 minutes.

 

Think about how your house works naturally, and then think of a solution. My dh handles bills, and we keep a plastic bin on the top shelf of the coat closet for him. This is where he keeps his keys, wallet, pager, and I throw in any paperwork that he needs to see or deal with.

 

As far as the catalogs go--I keep a set of plastic folder divider tabs that are Circa bound (you can buy them prebound, though) in my junk drawer. I keep store flyers in a pocket, coupons I need to clip in another pocket, etc. If there is a shipping/coupon code I want, I rip off the page from the catalog, file it in the coupon pocket and throw the catalog away. Magazines go on my nightstand, and I throw them away when I'm done reading them. I rip out any articles/recipes I want.

 

You could throw your kid's work in a bin, and when it's full go through and keep only the most important pieces.

 

But look at an area and see how you naturally use it, and then come up with a system that works for you. Not your friend, not a pro, but you and your family.

 

You can do this!

[H.S. Burrow]

The most important thing I learned from FlyLady was that I could do *anything* for 15 minutes. :)

 

Have your DD14 take the baby into another room to play and you take the other 3 girls into a cluttered room. Set a timer for 15 minutes and begin work on ONE area (clothes/dishes/toys). Work until the time goes off. Set a timer for 15 minutes again and check on DD14 & the baby, take a potty break, grab a snack and then go back to the same cluttered room for 15 more minutes.

 

Continue in this manner until you have 1 all the way clean room. It may take you all day or all week....but the point is to chop away at it 15 minutes at a time.

 

You will be amazed at how good you (and your girls!) feel when you have just one room that is completely clean.

 

FWIW, I don't use much of anything else from FlyLady. But I do use the 15 minutes for EVERYTHING. :) I work on lesson plans for 15 minutes, I pay bills for 15 minutes, I work on creating a filing system that works for us for 15 minutes, you get the idea.

 

I even exercise for 15 minutes. ;) And it works.

 

I hope you find a system that works for you. :)

 

 

ETA: Judomom was posting as I was typing...I'm glad to know that I'm not the only one who can do anything for 15 minutes!

[gardening momma]

I have needed Lands End catalogs in the past because it had a free shipping coupon code on it. But, I never know where the catalog is and then end up spending the $ on the shipping.

Throw the catalog away (or recycle), and go online for coupon codes. My favorite place is www.retailmenot.com, but there are others if you do a search.

 

And what about school stuff and coloring pages and the pictures the kids bring home from Synagogue/Church? I have a ton of that stuff. I don't write on any of it, so I honestly have no idea what belongs to whom. But the girls seem to care that I keep it. I've thought about getting a box for each of the girls and having them put important stuff in there, but then what happens when the box gets full? Do things become less important as time goes by?

Have them write their names on them--tell them they'll have to if they want you to keep it. I tend to put stuff on the counter and then it piles up, so if they don't remember the picture a few days later, I put it in the recycle bin, unless it's something I really want to keep. I have a couple of three ring binders that I occasionally put a piece of artwork in. Sometimes they remember their picture, so I let them put it on the fridge or the door to the garage with magnets. Then after a while I take those down too and recycle them.

Edited July 8, 2009 by gardening momma

[Rita]

I have tried Flylady, but got overwhelmed with the emails.

I found a book called "The Messies Manual" by Sandra Felton, which really helped me in practical matters, like setting up a cleaning schedule that works for me (hmmm, need to get that going again!) For us, it was all about getting rid of stuff which we didn't use. I'm still working on that, but feel like I have conquered the STUFF issues of the house. Right now I'm working on the paper issues, LOL.

I totally agree with the 15 minute timer. It really, really works :)

I would encourage you to not buy any more clothes until you go through what you have and figure out what you need. Even on the clearance rack, it's not a bargain if it clutters up your home :)

 

blessings,

Rita

[BikeBookBread]

Magazines and catalogs are a problem for us...

 

Now when the mail comes, I stand right by the garbage and recycle bin and sort. Catalogs for the most part go straight into the recycle except for rare exceptions...something we've been waiting for, etc. I have a shredder for sensitive stuff, but to be honest, I don't use it as much as I should. I find tearing into a million little pieces with my hands has been faster and adequate enough instead of accumulating a "shred pile" which meant just another pile.

 

We keep the two most-current issues of magazines, except for a few exceptions: my Cook's Illustrated and our one-year set of Tabletalk (a devotional which can be used over and over on a yearly rotation).

 

Paper can overrun a home! I'm finding this with coloring books and pages now...they have their own bin right next to the area where the girls color.

 

Good for you for tackling this...it's a daily struggle for me, and it is encouraging when people post this question occasionally as it gives me a shot of adrenaline to do something too!

[Ellie]

My two favorite resources for taming the home:

 

File--Don't Pile! by Pat Dorff. You'll be able to put your hands on any piece of paper you own, pay your bills on time, and more with this. I love it.

 

Sidetracked Home Executives. It's where the Flylady got her start, and you don't have to turn on your computer to implement it. (Love the Flylady, but SHE owns my heart, lol).

[Colleen in NS]

I like Deneice Schofield's books. Esp. Confessions of an Organized Homemaker.

[cdrumm4448]

I use Flylady, but also got overwhelmed with all her e-mails. She has since cut them down to 5 or 6 day, but I went to her site and paid like $12 for the whole system on paper. I tweaked it to fit our house and lifestyle, put all the pages in a binder, and use it every day. Well, almost. Systems will keep your house clean. But, that said, since we've been considering homeschooling, my house has taken a nosedive. But, it'll come back 15 minutes at a time.

[Chris in VA]

I think the garbage can is your friend. Stand over it when the mail comes, and immediately sort. You will get rid of at least 50% that way, if yours is anything like mine!

 

"Halving it all" ala JennifersLost's blog is probably another good idea for you. I've found I simply "go thru and throw away," and it saves my sanity. I just totally cleaned up our basement schoolroom areas, and feel so much more peaceful and calm. I literally took bags of junk and tossed them--some really wasn't junk at all, but I knew it would never get to the thrift store or the donation place or whatever, and I knew it would be better for us all to just ditch it. Try going thru the kids' clothes ruthlessly--I'd save more than one outfit, but maybe just 5 or 6 of each kind of item (except we only each have 3-4 pairs of shoes--the kids just have one pair of sneakers, a pair of casual shoes, and one pair of dress shoes; I have a few more).

 

I do like having my own filing cabinet. We have all the warranties and directions for appliances in one folder, this month's bills in another, and various other files in the cabinet (we have 3 cabinets in the office). I have a tall cabinet just for me--I put printed out homeschool stuff in there (worksheets I may use one day, directions for cool activities, etc) as well as old notebooks ( I take the pages out of our binders and bind with 3 rings) and other work that I want to save.

 

I think decluttering is your first job, but that's how I roll.

[Janet in Toronto]

In terms of filing, I highly recommend Freedom Filer. It's a terrific, customizable system that was recommended on a decluttering blog. I have my paperwork completely under control, and that is saying a lot. When I implemented it, I was able to shred and toss three and a half garbage bags full of excess paper, and I reduced my filing cabinet from four drawers to two.

Edited July 8, 2009 by Janet in Toronto
typo