We are interested in learning Russian, and there are so many options out there!! Could you share what you used and how successful it was? Blessings, Rita

DS (17) has been a life guard for the past 2 years. He also has worked at the Boy Scout camp an hour from us as a life guard in the summer (he worked 2 weeks last year, and will be working for 8 weeks straight this summer) DS (15) has worked at a horse barn on and off for 2 years. Rita

Remember you have a limited number of private message space. I try to keep my PM box fairly well cleaned out. Usually if someone replies to a pm I sent, they reply with the entire conversation, so I don't typically keep my original sent message :) Rita

It simply moves the post to the top of the list :) It "bumps" it up Rita

Martha, we did something similar with our elder boy in December. He turned 17 in November, and was taking some dual enrollment classes at our local small private college. He was also taking math with a tutor, and an online Latin class. He is rather directionless, and wasn't doing well. We gave him the option of staying home for school, taking more dual enrollment, but there were not many credits we could financially let him take, or go down to the local public school, but retaking the second half of his Sophomore year. We discussed the pros and cons of retaking 10th grade; including getting a really good grounding in math, and having "extra" time to take classes that he wouldn't have had the chance to if we put him in the second semester as a Junior. He is really settling in and doing well, and has found a subject that fascinates him...Psychology, something no one could have predicted! Friend wise, he has made several friends across the grade levels, and has kept his home school friends. Parenting is so hard! Rita

Replying to the bolded part of your comments: We have done this with him. We have sat down on several occasions and honestly listened to the music and discussed the lyrics with him. We have asked him WHY he likes the lyrics, and his response is "I don't know". I am trying to get him to think about the why aspect of it, without it becoming a sermon. I have to get off line here, but I value everyone's input into this! I will read all responses later on tonight :)

First off, thank you for praying for him and for me. :grouphug: Secondly, he has already told us he doesn't "want religion stuffed down his throat"...so I am not. What I am doing is trying to love him, and let him know that he is deeply loved regardless of his music choices. We don't refrain from mentioning Christ (never have, never will), we pray out loud before we eat, we try to make our relationship with the Lord alive (we always have). He still attends church with us without being asked....at least 2 Saturdays each month he and his brother spend the night with the associate pastor and his wife (they are like surrogate grandparents to our boys)....they both ask/beg to go over there. We are so blessed in that regard that we have other Godly people whom the boys adore. Thank you for your insight and prayers!

I wish I knew how to respond to you in your response! 1. Totally agree with what I bolded. I've told him that I like the music, just not the lyrics, and if he could find heavy (or even death) metal stuff that had no lyrics, I'd listen to it with him! 2. I couldn't agree more that he needs to own his own faith. We've talked with him about that....he needs to have a personal relationship with Jesus, not his parents' relationship. I had never thought about the fact that he might be using the music, etc during this time (what I bolded and underlined in your response). And just simply agreeing with the underlined sentences. It's so helpful to hash this out with others who have been there/done that, or just have a viewpoint about the situation.

I have thought about her over the last couple of months!

excellent points, and thanks for the unscientific take on it. We've thought some of those points, but hadn't sat down and wrote it out. I appreciate your insights.

Can you list some of the bands you 14yo listens to? I'm trying really hard to "eh" about it, but, boy, is that DIFFICULT. Great point about actions speaking louder than words, because he really is a terrific young adult. BUT, words are much more long lasting than actions. Think about when you have been hurt in the past...it's usually not a physical punch that you remember, but times when you were called a name, or told something hateful. Words stick in your head for a long time.

Amy, did you google Chelsea Grin? The fact that they named themselves after a torture method makes me wonder about them. Google their lyrics, any of their songs, but Crecabanger or Recreant are two that are telling examples of their thoughts.

I don't believe I have ever prayed so consistently for him, so that is a very good thing. Younger brother can't stand older brother's music, so that's not an issue (at the moment...younger bro just turned 15...his turn is coming)

He did the hair thing at 15 1/2...bleached it totally blond (he's naturally dark). Clothes haven't been an issue (much)....We've never battled his hair, cause I figure it'll grow out :lol:

I agree that he has not gone totally wild in his choice of rebellion, and am so incredibly thankful for that!