Asynchronicity is blowing my mind!

[Mommy22alyns]

I've taken to putting up a list of goals on our fridge, just to make sure that we have age-grade bases covered. I put up some first grade ones for Becca about a month and a half ago (and I'm very strict on how well she has to have mastered something before I check it off) and she'll probably have half of it under her belt before we really, truly officially start first grade. :001_huh: And that's the goals that she didn't already have mastered at the beginning of K.

 

But what's really boggling me is how far ahead she is in LA and how... not in math. I was looking up Grade Two goals last night and things like "Decode regular two-syllable words like butter" are listed along with "Know times tables through 5." :001_huh: Okay, Sylvia can decode regular two-syllable words (more than decode, but I digress). Becca had that down years ago. But the thought of her knowing how to multiply, much less having times tables memorized, seems so far away and lofty.

 

How do you deal in your own mind with your kids' asynchronous development? In teaching her, I go with where she is on each subject. But it's really taking some work to wrap my brain around how far apart she is in different areas of learning.

 

Does it get any easier? Or not? *sigh*

 

Thanks for reading and giving me an outlet to chatter about this! :001_smile:

[Misty]

I've been down this road. My now 11yo daughter began reading very young. When she was 7 she tested at junior high level for reading, reading comprehension, and spelling. She had never had a spelling lesson. By age 9 she was at high school level. Now she is definitely at post high school level. She reads voraciously and she also writes her own books. She is an extremely gifted writer.

 

However, in math.. She has mild dyscalculia and math has always been a struggle. She still does not have all of her math facts memorized. So we have experienced EXTREME asynchronous learning with her. She also has dysgraphia and her handwriting is atrocious.. More like a 3rd grader's.

 

You will get used to this.. Homeschooling is such a blessing for these kids. I could not imagine sending my daughter to school with her abilities and disabilities. What a wacked out experience that would be!

[Kuovonne]

I hear you.

 

Sparkle only recently turned 6. A month ago I gave her the DORA reading test, which is for grades K-12. She maxed out the word recognition part of the test (12th grade) and apparently has the vocabulary of a 4th grader. I didn't bother giving her a math test because I already knew that she was at a solid kindergarten level in math. Glitter (age 3) knows her letter sounds and can read CVC words.

 

I try to look at each subject independantly and just do the next thing, regardless of grade level. I also believe in right-brain/left-brain dominance. Reading and language arts are more left-brain skills. Understanding math is more a right-brain skill.

 

One thing I find hard about reading this board is that many of the familes on this board have kids that are gifted in math. I'm sure that other families have kids that are gifted in language arts, but they don't seem to be as vocal about it.

[CO MOM]

Don't usually read this section, but the "asynchronicity" title caught my attention - was curious what you meant by it. After reading your post, I understood and wanted to add that we were where you are 11 years ago. I don't know if it gets easier - you get used to it maybe - and I think there are more curriculum options now to allow you to customize which helps.

 

I guess we tried to challenge the strong area (primarily by seeking more challenging courses and outside opportunities) and keep plugging away at the weak area, realizing it took more work. My dd could not meet those math goals either and we had to keep at the basics clear up to high school - no early algebra here!

 

We used a fairly gentle math program in high school (TT) and required completion each year - in other words, no getting years behind - algebra 1 and 2 and geometry all had to be completed within the school year. It took extra hours and weekends and extra prep to prepare for the college admissions tests, but the reality of college admissions, etc. requires a certain level of math competency no matter how good you are in English!

 

It has all paid off - algebra 2 was actually not too bad this year. She just received her ACT and SAT scores - perfect in the English sections and good enough in the math/science that it won't hurt her admission or scholarship chances too much, which was our goal. The one advantage is that you don't have to prepare much for half the test!!

 

Your dd is still very young, so you may find that she starts to "get" math more at some point and catch up a bit. Keep at the basics and make sure she keeps moving along and doesn't bog down, even if it doesn't match exactly what the books say. All this about college admissions probably is not too helpful and sounds very far away, but I shared it to give you a sense of the big picture.

[Laura Corin]

One just gets more used to it. Calvin is always a long way further ahead in arts-based subjects than in maths.

 

Best wishes

 

Laura

[patchfire]

It is hard to handle at times. Dd1 has extreme difficulty with spelling. She has moderate difficulty with handwriting, and in terms of gross motor skills, she's lagged just far enough behind to be behind without catching attention for being "too" behind, yk? Yet... she's doing pre-algebra, and her 9th birthday isn't for another month. She reads on a 8th grade reading level or so, and her writing ability in terms of the skill (not penmanship) is above grade level, IMO. Meeting her 'where she is' is definitely a skill that I am still working on mastering!

 

Ds looks like he's going to be similarly asynchronous... except he's going to be writing well by five and spelling long words, but not reading them.:tongue_smilie:

[musicianmom]

Try finding a language arts program for a 4-year-old who can read "A Little Princess" but can't write letters at all.

 

I'm glad to know there's a word for it.

[lighthouseacademy]

For the most part, my son is academically synchronous, or close enough that I don't notice. However, emotionally, he is extremely asynchronous and physically quite a bit too. It took me quite a while to figure this out. I used to think, "Oh no, what is wrong with my child!" because at the time he was 4 or 5and would have outbursts like a 4 or 5 yr old but talked and thought and mostly acted like a 8-10 yr old... When I finally figured out that indeed he was emotionally the same as the other kids his age, I stopped stressing and just accept it. Now if only my MIL would accept that! AAAAACCCCCKKKKK

[amtmcm]

Try finding a language arts program for a 4-year-old who can read "A Little Princess" but can't write letters at all.

 

 

I really like the books in Beautiful Feet's Teaching Character Through Literature (the intermediate lessons). Off the top of my head the books are Family Under the Bridge, 100 Dresses , The Little Prince, Courage of Sarah Noble, etc... Sweet books with good messages (should be suitable for a young child) but the reading is not simplified.

 

Since your DD is still learning to write you can take a Charlotte Mason approach and use narration for comprehension and discussion.

 

I was in the same boat with my older DD and her levels started evening out in 5th grade when her math started catching up. My younger DD is the opposite. On her SAT's she's "past highschool" for math (doesn't mean she can do algebra, her scores were the same as someone past highschool taking the 3rd grade test). But her reading is just at a 4th grade level. She is all over the place on her SAT's and it's mostly because she doesn't like to read, so subjects like social studies suffer.

 

From my experience, having a good reader like your DD is a great problem! She will eventually be able to teach herself anything by reading about it.

 

One thought just came to me, though I don't have experience with this. One struggle for parents with gifted children is keeping them challenged. Since she's so accelerated in Language Arts, have you thought about starting Latin early? The Latin Road to English Grammar starts in 3rd grade and Latin for Children is geared for grades 3+. Again, not sure if this is a good idea, but just a thought....

 

On the other hand, I've totally fallen in love with Charlotte Mason's methodology and keep reminding myself to slow down, we don't have to work at breakneck speed even though my DD can handle it.

 

Enjoy the good books your DD can read already and there's no rush on the other subjects - they'll all come in time. :)

[WTMCassandra]

I was like this. Vastly asynchronous. Bless you for homeschooling this child.

 

I barely remember NOT being able to read on a college level. I have seen evidence that I was reading AND writing full sentences before my fourth birthday. Fortunately, I went to a small Christian school that let me read during downtimes and kept an SRA box in the back. They dealt well with me being soooo far ahead in anything having to do with reading.

 

However.

 

I remember crying over addition and subtraction flashcards. I felt like I was always just BARELY hanging onto grade level in math. I struggled with great pain and suffering as far as Algebra II in high school and hung up my math career eagerly (I barely managed to CLEP out of the couple of math courses required in college!).

 

I'm still a functioning adult today, even if I have to have my husband help me if the bank statement won't reconcile the first time. I can't calculate to save my life, but I'm logical and good with money concepts, so I feel like I can manage. And I use a scripted math curriculum ; ) so that my children don't inherit my math phobia (they haven't!).

 

Be kind to her. Her brain just might take longer to process math concepts, and she will be fine. You are doing her a great service.

[JudyJudyJudy]

I'm coming in with a different viewpoint. I was advanced in both math and language arts as well as in other subjects. This is not always a good thing. I feel that it held me back in college and in real life because I never was "better enough" in one area to easily pick what I wanted to do. As a result, I found myself very confused when it came time to pick a major, and since I couldn't figure out what to do, I became a teacher. I was never happy in the career I chose (though I love homeschooling), and I feel that things would have been different if I had been far stronger in one area than in the others.

[nmoira]

 

I'm coming in with a different viewpoint. I was advanced in both math and language arts as well as in other subjects. This is not always a good thing. I feel that it held me back in college and in real life because I never was "better enough" in one area to easily pick what I wanted to do.

The curse of being "globally" gifted. I went through much the same experience. This, coupled with the fact that I'd never before had to work at anything academically guaranteed that my first attempt at university would be disastrous. And it was, though not spectacularly so. On the bright side, I've had so many majors, I feel uniquely suited to homeschooling.

[Truscifi]

I'm coming in with a different viewpoint. I was advanced in both math and language arts as well as in other subjects. This is not always a good thing. I feel that it held me back in college and in real life because I never was "better enough" in one area to easily pick what I wanted to do. As a result, I found myself very confused when it came time to pick a major, and since I couldn't figure out what to do, I became a teacher. I was never happy in the career I chose (though I love homeschooling), and I feel that things would have been different if I had been far stronger in one area than in the others.

 

:iagree:

Me too! I went to a school for gifted kids, and all my friends had 'their thing' that they were really good at, but I never had one thing I really loved or was especially good at. Also, it all came very easily and I was rarely challenged, even in the advanced program, so I never learned to work hard. Even in college I had the same experience. I didn't find something that I really challenged me until I started scuba diving, and now I am working toward becoming a dive master and instructor.

[Desert Rat]

It did take me awhile to remember that just because Huck is advanced in one area, it doesn't me he's advanced in another. He read very early and by 5 tested at 8th grade level, but he hated reading any kind of fiction (he preferred it read aloud) and couldn't write. He reads college texts with little problem now but still can't spell. So his reading comprehension is up but not the rest that comes along with language arts.

Math is "his thing" so we always made adjustments to accomodate. For example, at 5 he was working on 3rd grade math but couldn't write some of his numbers. We used number stickers or he dicatated. I don't feel he should be held back because one part of the skills needed hadn't caught up yet.

Now, I just realize this is how it is and am really used to it.

[Mommy22alyns]

I'm coming in with a different viewpoint. I was advanced in both math and language arts as well as in other subjects. This is not always a good thing. I feel that it held me back in college and in real life because I never was "better enough" in one area to easily pick what I wanted to do. As a result, I found myself very confused when it came time to pick a major, and since I couldn't figure out what to do, I became a teacher. I was never happy in the career I chose (though I love homeschooling), and I feel that things would have been different if I had been far stronger in one area than in the others.

 

 

You know, I think this was me too. I was most advanced in LA, but I was advanced in math and other subjects too. There wasn't just one thing for me, and I was pretty muddled for a long time after graduating HS. I'm loving homeschooling too - maybe it's a good position for people like us! ;)

[MissKNG]

Yes, I'm struggling to understand my dd's asynchronicity. This is all new to me and I'm having a hard time wrapping my brain around how fast she can learn. We are homeschooling too and the preK curriculum I bought in March is already a wash!

[Kuovonne]

I'm coming in with a different viewpoint. I was advanced in both math and language arts as well as in other subjects. This is not always a good thing. I feel that it held me back in college and in real life because I never was "better enough" in one area to easily pick what I wanted to do.

 

I went into technical writing. I found it the perfect bridge between language arts and science/math.

[mktkcb]

Oh baby! Most of us deal with this ALL the time LOL! It IS hard to wrap your brain around. Makes me feel twitchy and somewhat scizophrenic on occasion. My 12yo is Mr. Async. in the flesh. Last year he was plodding his way through the BJU5 handwriting book, while romping through simultaneous equation in Algebra. I would say his main areas in which he varies greatly is the physical/maturity vs intellectual/musical. I remember one Sat a couple years ago when he was in an AWANA games competition on the 2nd string team. He did fine, but had kids trip over him a couple times...was just his typical "out to lunch" self. I was scorekeeping and one of the other moms leaned over and whispered to me at one point "who is that kid? they should disqualify him..." when he accidently made another kid trip (oops). Well, I think his team lost....no biggie anyway. RIGHT after said games we had to make tracks because he had a piano festival about an hour away. He changed in the car, we got to the festival, and he actually had to play in the same group as the advanced levels (he was intermediate). Cool as a cucumber....looking spiffy....he sailed right in, played beautifully, thoroughly impressed the advanced level judge and earned a "superior". He is *very* at home onstage. I just remember how mindblowingly *strange* I felt at the end of that day. Same kid. 2 different situations. Comes off looking totally inept in one situation, and completely the master of the other. ??????!!!!!. Aaaaaaaarrrrrrrrgggggg!!!! It keeps me humble.

[amtmcm]

I remember one Sat a couple years ago when he was in an AWANA games competition on the 2nd string team. He did fine, but had kids trip over him a couple times...was just his typical "out to lunch" self. I was scorekeeping and one of the other moms leaned over and whispered to me at one point "who is that kid? they should disqualify him..." when he accidently made another kid trip (oops). Well, I think his team lost....no biggie anyway. RIGHT after said games we had to make tracks because he had a piano festival about an hour away. He changed in the car, we got to the festival, and he actually had to play in the same group as the advanced levels (he was intermediate). Cool as a cucumber....looking spiffy....he sailed right in, played beautifully, thoroughly impressed the advanced level judge and earned a "superior". He is *very* at home onstage. I just remember how mindblowingly *strange* I felt at the end of that day. Same kid. 2 different situations. Comes off looking totally inept in one situation, and completely the master of the other.

 

Cute story! I can just picture that.

[bairnmama]

:bigear: This has been a very interesting thread as I'm thoroughly baffled by my dd. She can remember just about any story she's heard almost verbatim, has the oral vocabulary of a 5th grader, is a whiz at biology (mostly animal life and anatomy), composes wonderful poetry, and is VERY emotionally intuitive. Yet, she is across the board a low-K level in reading, handwriting, and math and goes to OT for dyspraxia. She just turned 8 last month.

 

But I have to agree with some of the posts that it will be easier for her to decide on a life path than it was for me. Everything came so easily that I had no clue what to major in and when I finally hit something I didn't understand quickly in Cal 2, I had no idea how to study for it. I finally ended up with a General Studies major headed for art conservation graduate work (until kids and a military spouse, that is). That was the perfect mesh of art, science, and history for me!

[kpupg]

fwiw ...

 

We had good results with reading aloud with adult level books, even when that was beyond the kids' reading levels. You could enrich history, etc. curriculum in this way. The kids loved it until they were old enough to handle that kind of reading on their own. I would digress from the reading to discuss current events that seemed relevant ... it was a great opportunity to weave together a lot of things that a curriculum would not have touched on.

 

Now they prefer to curl up in their rooms and read in solitude. :)

 

Karen

[Nan in Mass]

That's why we picked TWTM. LOL It assumed I had a reading well but not yet writing first grader. Everything else I found assumed my son would learn to read and write at the same time.