Maybe I'm missing a detail but at 7 I would have physically removed the doll from her arms before she walked into school and it would have had tone earned back or placed in time out for a time. In this instance, I see you as rewarding her for not listening to what you said. Other situations are tricker when they just refuse to do as you've asked. I know they aren't as simple. But I am confused as to why you allowed her to walk away from you with the doll and didn't just take it.

We have a diverse group of parents who choose what they want to offer for classes. This means that we have theater majors teaching theater and professional musicians teaching strings and helping in band and teaching recorder to younger ones. A "real" yoga teacher teaches short yoga sessions to different age groups. We have a professional sculptor mom who teaches art and sculpture. Etc. we have found that we are happier with mostly enrichment classes and we use the talents of the parents in the group. When the kids have an intense interest in something that no one in the group has skills in then we have hired that out.(art/drawing, computer programming, band, woodworking although that one was a parent and a volunteer who came along) We do limited academics, mainly things that work well in a group like IEW, literature and foreign languages(again being taught by parents who are fluent) We may have different goals then other coops though. Our main goal was to create a community for our kids to belong to so they have a social network to fall back on when they really need it during their teen years. We felt that meeting together weekly(it's actually 2x a week with park days too) would allow them to really cement friendships and a sense of belonging so that high school especially wouldn't be a huge pull for social reasons as we were watching SO many teens go to our low performing high schools when homeschooling wasn't enough especially socially. It has worked ;) all our older kids have had NO desire to go to school because they love our coop and know that we will continue to provide outlets for them with their friends. When the kids have come to us with an idea for a class we have done what we could to accommodate them by finding a parent or hiring a teacher. We have a very consistent group of parents who are committed to this coop and we all know that some years out kids will love every class and some years it will just be mainly social time and mostly it's in between. But our goals are being met. Just in case anyone is curious this group of families is approximately 28-35 families. It fluctuates but we have found this a good number to work with. We do require parents to teach because those of us around the longest and most committed we're feeling a bit burnt out carrying too heavy of a load. We haven't had anyone totally opposed to teaching as we are flexible in what that means. Some surpervise PE time or lead group games. Some are in charge of the nursery. All the parents speak up for what they want to do and we accommodate desires as much as possible. Moms take a term off from anything intense while having a new baby or other times of change/stress. I know I am rambling but this seemed like a thread where ideas were wanted. I love love love our coop and want to encourage others that they can be great ;) it had been a lot of work but so so worth it!

As far as cost our coop charges a building fee per family per semester. Runs about $100. This is to pay the church for use of their space (donation really) Then the nursery and preschool classes cost about $5-10 per child per term to cover snacks and supplies. The other classes charge a supply fee based on need and these are all clear on the reg form. Some are free and some are up to $50 a term or maybe more(we offer may levels of iEW and this includes books etc). Anything they need for the classes is charged for up front so the parents are scrambling to bring stuff in etc. we also sometimes have to charge for outside teachers that we pay(band, art etc) when we don't have parents who can or want to teach certain subjects. Those classes usually run an extra $60 or so a term ($5 a week) but are not required. Just if they want that class. Last term we had to charge theater kids for the rights to the play but the class itself was taught by parents. (We have several dads that are the main homeschooler and bring their kids) Myfamily pays about $350-400 a term and that is more than anyone else ;) I have 8 kids and always 3 in band which we pay a teacher for. The other fees add up though. None of the parents get anything other than a re-embursment for costs but everyone is working a class the whole time(ether actively teaching or assisting or snuggling babies)

No I agree with you! I was offering up another solution to the field trips that don't work well for all ages. Because reality is that they don't always. We have weekly park days open to all but our coop classes require that the oldest child in the family be 8. Not even school age. Some people really don't like this policy but we have found it works out better for all. The moms who join are more committed and stay longer. Coop days are just ok overwhelming for a mom with a new 5 year old and maybe a couple younger and a baby. So we just set the age at 8 when the child really does well and may NEED some time with peers etc outside of park days. (All younger siblings are taken care of at coop just to be clear)

Wow. I'm surprised at how many people would be upset by this. I think it was great ;)

Yes yes yes!!!! We don't do that with teachers kids getting priority because everyone is require to teach something after their first term with us. But what you are saying with volunteering vs intense teaching or being on the board is so true. I get frustrated when people complain or want more but don't step up and give more. It's a lot of work. With the field trips, we often (amoungst ourselves and friends not as an organized coop effort) have some moms watch babies/toddlers while their bigger kids go with the other moms. Everyone is happier that way. But I agree that with homeschooling preschoolers are just part of the package. That is why our coop accommodates all ages. There are a couple drop off kinds here we've tried but I really miss the sense of community that comes from families being there together.

Our coop is run as you describe but we do allow a drop off situation for people who need it. They pay more. Quite a bit more ;) we use the money to subsidise the parents who are there teaching AND the kids have to be at least ten. Works really well

I haven't read the thread but have run into the same sof issue as active LDS. Our solution was to start our own coop ;) and be decidly inclusive of all. We(myself and a couple like minded friends who started it) have been very successful. We have all religions and "types" of homeschoolers. We offer a variety of classes and when there have been religious based classes we always spell it out at registration and make sure there are other choices offered at the same time. My kids have made great friends, built relationships with awesome adults etc. Just to encourage you that it can be done and most likely there is a need for it in your area too ;)

I have never been of the mindset that caring for a family (with or without homeschooling) is throwing a life away. It is my life and I am very happy being a wife and mother. I am absolutely ok with never working for money. If you are not and can't come to terms with your worth outside of paid employment then you must factor that into your decision.

Would it make you feel better to test your water? Home test kits are easy and will let you know if your chlorine level is in a good range.

We live in Las Vegas ;) We just teach our children to avert their eyes and we do as well. Billboards are everywhere here and we just choose not to look at them. Of course they know we don't approve. No need to rehash it all the time. It's pretty much a non issue. If they were to see a *totally* topless female(as opposed to one with poker chips barely covering her n*pples,LOL) they would be shocked but we would just remind them to look elsewhere and not dwell on it.

Not what you asked, but my four oldest have a "pattern". While pregnant with #5 we had a named we loved but it didn't "fit". I was conflicted but in the end it was the name for her. I am now expecting # 10 and I'm so glad we can just pick a name now and not have to be limited to specific parameters. Letting go of that pattern was the best thing we did. It's hard enough coming up with a name we both like ;)

When my daughter died I really appreciated all the cards we received. They trickled in for a couple weeks. I also appreciated all the meals. It was months before I could really function at any semblance of normal level. Plants and flowers were nice and I appreciated the lovely pictures I have of her viewing and graveside. The plants that were delivered to our home(we buried her in another state) slowly died all around me in the coming weeks etc. food was better but I appreciated anything anyone did :)

The only time you would need trunk space is shopping?!?! You never plan to go out of town?

We did but ate it on or one month anniversary. Didn't want to risk it being yucky at a year cause it was good :)

Chevy astro. We loved ours. They don't make them anymore :( It's a truck bed not a car bed so considerably more leg room etc compared to a mini van With 8 people you may consider just moving up to a passenger van. I like having seats for friends and more trunk space etc. we got ours when there was 9 of us though and we outgrew the astro.

I will just bow out and agree to disagree. I do believe that the temple standards of dress are divinely inspired and I teach them to my children all along. I don't disagree with teaching them from a young age to follow the standards. I disagree with your assesertion that men are lusting after young children as the reason for it. I dont see that your examples are saying that either. Just that these are the standards and learning them and applying them at a young age is good. I see you are offended that it is tipped more towards girls but I just believe that is a reflection of the reality of our society and what clothes are out there for the different genders. I am not upset or offended by it. I am happy and secure in my gender and with my body. Being taught modestly taught me self respect. Obviously your experience has been different and you take it in a different way.

I agree but this must vary by location. I have never seen boys wearing anything other than t shirts and knee length shorts. The girls of the same age are wearing shorts that look like underwear and cover about as much and tank tops with major cleavage and their bra straps showing and this is considered normal. It's a double standard. We require temple standards for all our kids therefore no double standard ;) I was not addressing whether post puberty girls/women are instructed not to show their nearly naked body to the world as a way of showing kindness to boys who really don't need to see that much skin etc. I personally don't have a problem with that teaching. It's not shameful to me. I was addressing that you said you had been called out for a 7 year old in a sleeveless dress/sundress as men might be aroused. I have never heard that kind of extrapolation. Those who choose to use that standard (myself and personal friends family who I've discussed it with) do it because its simpler to just get used to the standards The Lord has outlined from an early age and not expect a girl to change her dress at some later maybe even arbitrary time. But not because there is anything sexual about a 7 year old which is what you said you've had said to you.

I'm in the same religion you left and I don't see it that way at all. My girls cover their shoulders because it teaches them good habits and makes it so that they don't have to change their clothing later when they go to the temple. I have never not once in my 37 years of going to church heard anyone say that men will be tempted by a 7 year olds shoulders. That is just ick and if you have heard that especially multiple times, then I see why you would be horrified. I see young kids with uncovered shoulders in church all the time in many states(including Utah although I don't live there now we visit) and I've never seen or heard of anyone making issue of it. I still stand by my stance that having "normal" clothes for females be so revealing while normal clothes for boys are not AT ALL is a negative reflection of our culture and the way it views and treats women.

I get you have a beef with this but just shopping for both genders should give you an idea on why it has to be spelled out a bit more for girls ;). I mean boys clothes are pretty much modest by default. It kinda would take extreme effort for a boy to dress immodestly. Girls on the other hand, my gosh it is so hard to find stuff that I feel is modest enough for both me and my daughters. We have to layer etc. and don't even get me started on swimsuits. Boys get loose trunks and rash guards. Girls get skippy suits even the toddlers. Ever wonder why people think speedos on boys/men is yuck but we accept the same style as appropriate for girls?!?? Yes, less of a bulge in front but even one piece swimsuits do not cover girls/women any better than a speedo on a man. I know everyone on this thread is blaming men as oppressing women in forcing dress standards on them. I don't even know why I'm still reading it honestly but I see it totally different. I see the skimpy show everything clothing styles that are culturally expected for females in this culture(swimsuits, low necks etc) as degrading to women not honoring. I know girls dress for themselves and what is comfortable blah blah blah. I dont think that is entirely true in most cases. And most of us are limited to what we can get in stores and the pressure to not look "frumpy" or out of style is great. I mean look at this whole thread about how women who cover more of themselves look. And now I will put on my flame proof suit and wait for the onslaught of nastiness.

Yes. Shopping cart or baby stroller. My favorite baby toy is the ball popper. But it makes noise and is plastic LOL! It is still very very fun.

I feel for you. I am 28 weeks with my tenth and my last six have been natural at home.(I had epidurala for the first 3) The amnesia you get to forget labor wears off when you've done it so many times. :( No one says laboring quietly is the best way. Really don't feel bad about getting through the contractions any way you can. It DOES help though to keep your jaw and mouth loose and to use low tones, not high. So ask your husband to remind you and help you keep all vocolizations low in tone. If he does it you will match him. I don't want to do labor again either but I'm jealous you will be holding your sweet baby soon!

Haha! I've been there. Probably not looking for advice but the way I handle this is a very strict policy of tall hampers for dirty clothes and actuay baskets for clean clothes. My family knows I mean business :) now at least I know what's clean even if it not folded and put away!

No no no!! The sun will ruin the Lycra and they will stretch out. Hang to dry but not outside.