I have a son with similar tendencies towards procrastination and work aviodance. He has mild dyspraxia, so writing is a chore, but there is nothing else going on except that he is lazy. He struggled to make lasting friends until very recently. The change has been remarkable. But he's still lazy! I sit with him through most of his school work. He simply isn't ready for independent work yet, and I think working with him is half the joy of homeschool, even when he's being vile. But I'm lucky: I only have one kid to worry about. I know a lot of natural learners from our homeschool group (we are Steiner homeschoolers who are becoming progressively more classical as DS12 gets older). While natural learning is not for us, it may work for your situation. I think Khan academy would work well for maths: let him do the online questions. If you want a "proper" maths program, try year 7 of MEP (its designed for kids who haven't used MEP before). Start with the interactive tutorials. They're pretty easy and you get lots of positive reinforcement. MEP turned maths around for us - it used to be a battleground. Ditch writing for a while. Get him to draw cartoons or make lego movies of what he learns instead. Read ANYTHING, even if its complete dross. Join the lego club and read the lego magazine with him. Buy him a guitar and get him lessons, preferably with a male teacher so he someone else to bond with. Do TaeKwanDo. Make him exercise (this works wonders for mental health - I see it in my husband who controls his depression with exercise). Turn around the way you see him: he can be your helper with the younger kids, not the hindrance. Get him to teach them and read to them. Its a great way to revise and suss out where his knowledge is weak. If it works, pay him to tutor them. No you aren't rewarding crappy behaviour, you're giving him an incentive to come good. Most adults don't work for free. He's old enough to discuss this change to his school work with him. He knows he's a pain in the a#$@ - its become his raison d'etre, a nasty self-fulfilling prophecy that he can't stop and you must. The language around him has to change. You need a support group. This may well be the hardest thing you have ever done, but it will also be one of the most worthwhile. Hugs D

Yep, I like school lots more the DS12. He likes fixing small engines and playing on the iPad. So sad, too bad! D

I think this is really interesting, too, although you'll never convince me that i can sound like ee! I'm fascinated by the lip movement differences. We Aussies don't move our mouths much when we speak. Its supposedly one of the reasons our accent is so flat. I think you guys, especially the Southerners, must work at lot harder at talking than we do. D

Only on your side of The Ditch, Grover! Here in the Western Antipodes (ie Australia) we say "pink" with a short "i" and we eat "fish and chips". I'm amazed at the idea of peenk and paynk! We don't have a lot of regional variation in Oz. D

I was caned with the bamboo handle of a feather duster at school. Let me assure you it hurts! Heather, while I don't think you are in anyway responsible for this mother's behaviour, I am curious about why you inform parents when their children are disciplined at school. I think school and home should be seperate. I don't think you should be disciplined twice for the same offence. The kid was stupid. Kids ARE stupid - they are still learning. Yes, he was probably mean. But didn't you deal with it? Did he have to cop it twice? I think his mother probably reacted to the shame of the incident. This is not uncommon and something you probably need to keep in mind. For kids with volatile parents, school is often a necessary place of refuge. Its a big part of your job to ensure that this refuge stays safe. If it was an ongoing problem, you suspected an underlying disorder, the child had seriously injured someone, or the child wasn't amenable to discipline, then contact the parents. But otherwise, the teacher on duty should handle it, with you as the back-up. If the kid wants to tell his parents that he was vile and got into trouble, thats up to him. And yes, I did have a volatile parent and school was sometimes a refuge, so my opinion is clouded. D

No, its just really normal! Your son is exceptional. It is likely that he would be in the same situation at school. Outstanding maths teachers are not common, and they usually don't spend time teaching 12 year olds, anyway. Outstanding science, art, music and language arts teachers are equally rare. And they are never the same person! Its perfectly reasonable for a child to out-strip his parents, although it can be hard on the ego. There are things I simply cannot teach my son. Could you ask your son to teach you instead? You'd be able to check his understanding and mirror hnis pace, and you can still be there to nut out difficult problems. And really, if AoPS doesn't work for your whole family, then maybe its not the right program for your main maths program (easy for me to say - I have one kid, he's not mathy and I use integrated maths). If it makes you feel any better, I probably won't ever use my outstanding diagnostic algorithm writing skills with DS, or my fantastic meta-analysis missing data extrapolations. D

This book comes out of the Steiner/Waldorf community. We started out as Steiner homeschoolers (actually we spent 4 years involved in a Steiner School before homeschooling). The transition to no media is hard, but cold turkey is the easiest way. Put a cloth over the TV during the day. Out of sight, out of mind. It stops dominating the living space in your home. Tell the kids that you have learned that TV isn't so good for young children and that only the adults will watch it after the kids are in bed (and you have to then live by this. If you or DH must sneak TV in, do it somewhere the kids don't go). The kids will scream and kick for a couple of weeks, you will be the meanest parents alive, they will have no friends, etc. Eat chocolate/drink wine/whatever - this phase will pass. Once your kids rediscover how to amuse themselves, they'll forget about the TV and stop asking for it. But you'll have 2-4 weeks of whingeing to deal with in the interim. You can make this easier by organising their toys onto shelves, rather than piled in a heap, tossing rubbishy toys or setting up a toy rotation, as well as scheduling something nice to do together during peak TV time (not so good when cooking dinner - I use to put DS in the bath (close to the kitchen in our house) or sit him up on the kitchen bench for a chat while cooking. Play dough is another good "cooking dinner" activity). HTH D

Reading The Writer's Jungle changed my approach to teaching writing - it took the pressure off. I still use the same programs (Killgallon and Writing Strands) and I still have the same DS (albeit he's a bit older and teenagerish), but the whole process has improved GREATLY! If your daughter wants to be a writer, she might appreciate programs that use examples of published work, like Killgallon, KISS, and WWS. Of the three, I've only used Killgallon and it was a hit. D

I think most readers are ghastly, but then I loathe Dr Seuss as well (I know that puts me in a tiny minority). We used Steiner/Waldorf methods when DS12 was young, including the beautiful Elsa Beskow books. I don't think readers have to be dumbed down or monosyllabic. Far better than Dr Seuss, in my not so humble opinion, is Lynley Dodd's Hairy Maclary series and its spin offs. Fabulous rhythm and rhyme, funny, well illustrated, descriptive and no talking cats. DS would have loved a book that mentioned lug nuts! D

My son is very similar to your daughter. He's now 12. We switched to MEP because he was balking at another maths program, hugely frustrated and thought himself an idiot. MEP has been fantastic. We started in yr6 last year and backtracked when we found something we hadn't covered. We will finish yr6 in term 3 of our year 7, leaving us a term to cover anything in the Australian syllabus that we have missed and to revise and firm up anything that he isn't solid on. We will then move on to MEP 9. My understanding is that Yrs 7 and 8 of MEP are basically a rehash of the primary syllabus and are written for kids who haven't used MEP before. This will put DS on par or ahead of the Australian syllabus. MEP 6 covers lots of high school work, including directed numbers and algebra. So, your daughter will not be behind at all if you stick with MEP. She'll actually be ahead. D

What sort of learner is your child? If they pick up and retain knowledge well by reading I would put life science and earth science together, one in each semester and do the bulk of it by reading and watching documentaries. Pick a project topic in each and have them complete some research and a write up. Chemistry and physics I would give a year each to and try to incorporate lots of labs. I'm a scientist. In my experience biology and the earth sciences involve lots of "learning" of material (there are exceptions, but this is middle school). Chem and physics require deeper understanding and this understanding builds on previous work. Without a solid chemistry background, lots of later biology doesn't make as much sense. Of course, the other option is to adopt the British/Australian model of integrated sciences and just up the pace. D

You can download a free kindle app for the ipad. Then you can download the kindle version of the ebook and it will go straight to the kindle interface. Very nice! D

Yep, we did this especially when we were more Steiner in our approach. We did a block schedule. Third grade was Native Americans (about 6 weeks) and another on Aboriginal Australia. Lots of myths and legends during both blocks. Year 4 we did Norse Myths and Vikings. 5th was Ancient Egypt, Persia and Mesopotamia, then Greece. Again, lots of myths and other literature. Last year we spent lots of time on Ancient Rome and Celtic Europe and moved away from a block schedule to a more WTM schedule (DS's choice - I prefer blocks). D

I've always had long hair. Its thick, wavy and frizzy if the weather is humid. Best thing I've ever done is stop using conditioner. I wash my hair every 4 days or so (depending on how warm it is) with Dr Bronners liquid soap (one wash only), then rinse with about a tablespoon of apple cider vinegar in a cup of water. If the ends feel dry I put a bit of coconut or sesame oil on them. I can't be bothered blow drying it, and I plait it if it starts to frizz, but this is very rare post-conditioner. My hair has become much curlier and heaps more manageable under this regimen. The added bonus is that I don't get eczema from the conditioner. D

The sun is shining here in the Southern Hemisphere, its a glorious 27 degrees Celsius, and I bought 4 anyway! D

Welcome to the club - I've been an idiot for years! I have offered to get my degree out a couple of times to prove to DS that I do know something. There is that great quote: "When I was 15 I couldn't believe how dumb my parents were. Now I'm 25, I'm amazed at how much they have learned in such a short time." D

Nothing to add, except to say "snap". DS is 12, 5ft 6, already shaving and couldn't find his own backside most days. He's bored, critical, lazy and only wants to play with the iPad, fix small engines or design amazing lego technics vehicles. In fact, I think he might be a TEENAGER! DH spends his time oscillating between chuckling at him and wanting to kill him. He can do one instruction some of the time and two instructions never (DS not DH, who can reliably do 2 but not 3!). I'm hoping this phase will pass quickly (its been going downhill for about 6 months). I console myself with the thought that at least he's not a teenage girl (BTDT). D

Just quickly, for the OP, the two Australian Steiner curricula that I know of are vastly different. Eric Fairman's is great and easy to implement. Great reading recommendations and poems included. The maths is pretty advanced, but you have to make up any worksheets or problems. Alan Whitehead's is firmly rooted in anthroposophy and can be very hard to chew through. Some of the science and history gets a bit weird. Alan is a lovely man, and very helpful if you contact him, but I found the curriculum hard to implement. Proper anthropops love it. D

It was an accumulation of little things for us, too, prior to the final incident. DS was also an early reader and I felt almost guilty about that. We were frequently told to make sure he didn't end up too much "in the head". His teacher openly swore when he discovered how well he could read in grade 1. Honestly, like lots of things to do with education, I think Steiner is best in the homeschool, when you can leave the bits that don't suit and keep the bits that do. Telling you to stop breastfeeding is just outrageous. I have heard of it before, but most of the Steiner-ites I knew thought it was very extreme. Its consistent with a feeling I had that the school was slowly pulling our son away from us and trying to be the dominant influence. Nothing I could ever quite put my finger on, but always there, along with a feeling of judgement: we, the Steiner educators, know better than you. Leave it to us, pay the school fees and all will be well. This put us off the school, not the method. These days, we have almost outgrown the method. D

I've got one too: 12 year old boy. He's so temperamental (80% temper and 20% mental). Everything is "boring", especially us! We have two weeks of summer holidays left. I'm sooooo not looking forward to school - and neither is he. Meanwhile, my 24 year old step daughter has announced that she won't be having any teenagers (her son is 6 months old). I reminded her of how revolting she was and wished her luck. D

My son spent three years in a Steiner school. Extended breast feeding was encouraged, and young children were free to develop at their own pace. Parents were encouraged to stop children under 7, and preferably children under 14, watching TV or using electronic games and computers, but this was never enforced, only strongly suggested (about 30% of us had TV-free kids under 7). The black crayon thing comes up a lot. The truth is that no ethic group gets accurately represented using only the 7 rainbow colours (and thats the decider for kids in class 3 and under - skin colours start around class 4 or 5). We are Anglo-Celtic Australians. I have brown hair, brown eyes and white skin. My husband has black hair and blue eyes. My son's eyes are green. In my son's early pictures, all of us have blue or purple hair and yellow skin. Our eyes have varied from purple, through blue and green. Pink is not included in the crayon box either, because it isn't in the rainbow. None of this was ever an issue. Kids are, when left to their own devices, usually blissfully unaware of skin colour until an adult brings it up. MOst of the time they draw characters from stories, not their own families, anyway. I'm not trying to defend Steiner - he was a product of his times. The schools are a mixed bag - we pulled our son out because of bullying and a hopeless class teacher, who, 5 years on with the same kids, is still hopeless. But the curriculum in the younger years, especially from providers like Christopherus, can be rigorous, fun and really lovely. D

Wee Folk Art would be the cheapest to implement, otherwise you're paying for a lot of stuff you won't use. Christopherus is quite a rigorous curriculum up to year 5 (we used it from 2-5, there is only a guide and a couple of history units for 6 and 7). Its very easy to implement and there is room for tweaking (eg we changed the two 3rd grade Native American blocks into one Native American block and one Australian Aborigines block very successfully based on the guidance given in the curriculum - its one of the best things we've ever done and the posters still hang on the walls three years on). A Little Garden Flower is another nice, gentle option. Its cheap, too, but you'll have to make up the lessons yourself: its not open and go. Live Ed is full-on, anthroposophy based Steiner. It is visually stunning, but can be a bit esoteric (and quite loopy in some places wrt science). It only covers main lessons ( known as the "head" lessons ) and I think you really want the block lesson (the "hands" lessons). Another possibility is Earthschooling, where you can buy short memberships to check things out. You could buy a book like Earthwise, The Children's Year or Festivals, Family and Food, and add in seasonal craft. Or read Freya Jafke's fabulous book, Work and Play in Early Chidhood. Check out Bob and Nancy's bookshop for loads of Steiner craft books. Try not to fall for all the lovely craft supplies! You will need good watercolour paints (3 primary colours, try Stockmar or Paper, Scissors, Stone) and watercolour paper (cheap paper doesn't work), some fleece, woolen felt (or make it from fleece) and beeswax crayons (Stockmar are worth the money and last forever). A set of Lyra Ferby pencils and some modelling beeswax and you're done. D

We've successfully used Steiner's methods since 2nd grade, while leaving anthroposophy out. Now, as we move into year 7, this has become harder. I find more religion creeping into the history books and more Goethe creeping into science (Steiner was heavily influenced by Goethe, in particular his theories on colour and science teaching). We are atheists and scientists, so none of this sits well with us. But some of Steiner's ideas do resonate: delayed academics, honouring childhood, rhythm in the home, beauty, and integrating art and story telling across the curriculum. We used Christopherus, which I found to be the least esoteric curriculum. Its also quite rigorous and easy to use. We have steadily become more classical as my son has grown older. He asked to drop the block lesson format mid 6th grade (seems 1.5 hours of one subject every morning for three weeks lead to some serious droning-on on my part....). I have 4th grade of the old black and white Oak Meadow, and the high school World History syllabus. I found absolutely no anthroposophy in either. In fact, back when DS was in 4th and I was more of a purist, I wrote Oak Meadow off as too fragmented and lacking in the beauty and story telling I loved from Steiner. Now, I think Oak Meadow is really solid and well rounded. I don't find its maths hard enough for DS (its very light compared to other Waldorf maths). The only downers are a strong North American bias (a fairly normal problem for we Aussies) and the fact that its bloody expensive! You can pick the best bits out of Steiner and leave the rest. It just takes effort. But Oak Meadow is not Waldorf. D

In fact, its currently so hot in much of Australia (reprieve in Sydney today following some much needed rain, but back to 40 degrees C on Friday) that the Bureau of Meterology has had to come up with a new colour to map the higher temperatures (deep red had already been used, so now we have fires-of-hell purple). Large parts of Australia are currently on fire - we nearly lost our National Observatory last night, and last week, more than 100 people lost their homes in Tasmania (that's the cool part of Australia, BTW). I am a scientist. I teach sustainability, so my opinion is well informed. The anti-climate change lobby uses two highly unscientific methods to discredit the real science: anecdote and vote counting. Anecdote is very popular in Australia: the news will show a climate scientist saying that global warming is affecting weather, water, bush fires, etc, then they will show some old bloke who says it was hot when he was a kid. At it worst, this moves to vote counting: one scientist, one denier, 3 scientists, 3 deniers. What the untrained public doesn't understand is that the scientist is presenting the results of scientific investigations based on very large data sets, with potential errors taken into account, and that such information is usually only made public when it is shown to be statistically significant. The deniers are, by and large, not backed by science, but rather by opinion and anecdote. To equate one denier with one scientist is like holding up 5 cents and saying its the same as $1000 because they are both money. Its ignorant and, at this point, scandalous. As for the allegation that the scientists have ulterior motives, I'm not sure what sort of life you think most scientists live, but let me put your mind at ease. Most scientists work for about the average wage here in Australia, following 4-10 years of university. Its about the same in the US. Most tradesmen (plumbers, electricians, etc) earn twice as much as scientists who work in the public sector I earn more working as a gardener. Most are on short term contracts, 6-12 months long. All work long hours and spend at least 3 months of every year applying for funding. All take work home. They don't have any spare time or money to get involved in green-tech investments. Its not freedom that allows you to pollute the environment and steal quality of life from the next generations. You are taking more than your fair share. That's greed and ignorance. Just because you can afford it, doesn't mean you're entitled to it. And the comment that global warming will extend the growing season and prevent cold related deaths is so breathtakingly ignorant and short sighted that it has left me shaking. Tell that to the people who are dying of drought induced famine, or have lost their homes this year and last to dramatic climate events. I'm sure your increased comfort will give them great solace. Danielle

I read Catcher in the Rye too young and really don't remember it. I think I simply didn't get it. We did seem to have a big dystopian push in high school, beginning about year 8. While some of the books are well known, I'm not sure the writing is good enough to merit classic status. It did seem to ramp up the US/USSR nuclear war worry that was prevalent in the '80's. Those Flowers in the Attic books were such rubbish. My mother gave them to me. All my friends read them. My mum also gave me Carrie when I was 13. I LOVED it. It encouraged me to write. A little gratuitous trash can be good. I read lots of Shakespeare, metaphysical and modern poetry, Austen, Bronte, etc as well. I also read loads of Jeffery Archer - more trash. My dad took some of them from me, but I just took them back when he wasn't looking. I don't think I censor (;)) but I do put off books till DS is old enough to understand the subject matter, not just the words. He's 12. He reads some trash as relaxation reading and we have discussed self-censoring, which he's quite good at. I won't give him To Kill a Mockingbird, Brave New World or Lord of the Flies yet. He doesn't need to go there: his innocence is precious and very short lived. D