I am not Christian so take that into account if you like....but I see my kids as gifts from God, and I see them as my biggest teachers, not just the other way around. My kids teach me compassion and humility. I dont presume to always know what is best for them or what is right. I just do my best, as you are doing, as we all do. Trust your heart, your inner knowing, trust your love for your child. You were given inner guidance, a connection to what is right and best for you in your own heart. I gently suggest that you examine your beliefs in the light of what your heart feels is the right thing to do. Swinging to the opposite extreme of how we were treated as children has never worked.

I wonder if you are looking for a permanent state of tidy, uncluttered home? Where it just never gets messy again? I mean.....I figured it was normal to end up with stuff that doesnt belong anywhere, and kind of stuff it somewhere for now. And that by the time I finished decluttering all my rooms and areas of my life....it was time to start back at the beginning again. I dont think there is ever an end point. Is there? (am I missing something? :) ) I jsut figured for people who arent Born Organised (and i most certainly am not BO) it is an ongoing thing for the rest of my life. Collect clutter (I love garage sales). Release clutter. Enjoy the release process. ENjoy the empy cupboard for a while. Enjoy buying the next thing at swap meet/garage sale. Start process over again. Thats how it works for me, anyway :) Recently I have been through a binge of decluttering and completely terrified my packrat husband. I actually got rid of about 3/4 of my wardrobe. I cleaned out the kitchen cupboards, and made $800 on selling books. It was huge. But now that all that has gone...there is so much more to do! And...I am slowly buying more clothes and books. At least there is space for them! I am not sure there is a solution other than to get very, very disciplined (which is no fun if you enjoy stuff) or get poor and not be able to afford even op shop clothes and stuff. I tihnk thats why teh Flylady thing works...it is forming a habit of decluttering regularly. 15 minutes a day. But it never actually finishes. I love organisational systems. Have you read Getting Things Done? The Zen Habits website? I love things like these. I often only get one thing out of each website or book that I devour, but its always worth it for some spark of an idea of how to organise my stuff.

I am taking liver tablets at the moment. My body seems to enjoy liver. I also eat it. I buy organic calf liver, chop it into small pieces, along with some bacon, and store it in small serving sized bags in the freezer. Then I can take a bag out of the freezer, put it in some hot water to defrost, cook it up in 5 minutes. I like it with mashed potatoes and peas :) I take various supplements with iron in them at different times. I have never found the One Thing that always works for me.

I try but he doesn't handle it so well. I try and feed him well...he prefers what he prefers. I try and get him to come for walks....he would rather watch TV. I don't try and protect him from phone calls (he loves them, I dont) or from work around the house (we have our different areas that we tend to). They are not so relevant for us. He doesn't work hard, either- no harder than me, just different. We have a relaxed lifestyle so I dont need to protect him in that way. He loves his work and would work more if he could. I would say he is very protective of me, though. He has a mother hen gene. He will literally cook my red meat for me when I get run down, although he is a vegetarian (he just cooked me fish for lunch even though he wont eat it. I made him cauliflower cheese which he loves). He will try and protect me from friends he sees are not good for me. In that way, he is more the protector.

Tea is a synonym for evening dinner here- around 6pm. We say "be home for tea" and "be home for dinner" meaning the same thing.

I tend to go really gung ho at decluttering when I am in the mood- and I will be quite radical about it. So...while it is important to realise that baby steps are best....if you have the time and energy, a burst of enthusiasm can also get a lot done in my experience. Also....enjoy the process! Instead of beating yourself up about your messiness or disorganisation- which can be more paralyzing than helpful...how about getting enthusiastic and excited about decluttering a closet? I guess its not everyone's cup of tea but I actually enjoy it. Focus on what you CAN do right now, or today..rather than the mess. Play some fun music. Keep your sense of humour. Attack the mess! :)

As others have said, it would depend how desperately I needed the money. I would have to be pretty desperate. I value my sleep immensely- it colours my whole quality of life, how grumpy I get, how snappy I am with dh and the kids- so ultimately it would affect the whole tone of our home. Sufficient sleep is even related to healthy weight, not to mention other health issues.

I AM a morning person and I dont do what you are doing...I force my poor kids to start early. Dd16 now says she IS a morning person (and she definitely didnt use to be) because she exercises with a friend and has to be up by 7am to do that. So, the motivation is there for her to get up early...it's not just for school. She also has a coffee in the mornings and that helps. However, if *I* wasnt a morning person, if it worked better for *me*, I wouldnt hesitate to change our schedule to whatever works. I think what you are doing is great because it is honoroung yourself and your fmailys' natural rythmns, and I think that teaching our kids to take care of themselves and do what works for themselves is also valuable. How hard is it to learn to wake up at 6am if a job you want insists that you do? Do you really need a whole childhood of practice to be able to do that? I don't think so. I start early because I wake early and by 1pm I am done. If my own inner clock worked differently, so would our school day.

To me the issue is not black and white- not vaccinate or dont vaccinate. Not, accept the medical establishments position to vaccinate heavily from birth, or totally reject it. The studies I have seen suggest that many of the diseases we have vaccinated against were already in great decline due to improvements in public and private hygeine- in western countries, before vaccination was established. And while diseases like measles can still kill and cause serious problems in western countries...it is much rarer than it used to be when measles is actually contracted. I am sorry that I did vaccinate my daughter against measles. The reason being....she can now NOT pass on immunity/antibodies to her newborn/young baby through her breastmilk. Vaccination does not produce the kind of antibodies in the mother that will protect a newborn baby...but having had the disease, does. So, we are messing with and bypassing a natural immune system process that has its own intelligence. The other issue for me is the vaccination of newborn babies, or 3 month olds. Their immune system is very immature. Bombarding it with several diseases in our relatively hygeinic culture....seems counter intuitive to me. Such tender little beings. I wodl rather wait, as they do in some countries, till the baby is older and their immune system is much more resilient and able to handle the onslaught- for that is acutally what it is. But I am still not convinced that vaccinations have no benefit whatsoever, especially in 3rd world countries where thousands still die from these diseases. But rather than take a strong position, I woudl rather just stay open to further information.

Spring here. Gorgeous. We went to the beach this morning. :)

Its about awareness. Awareness that some people - kids- react badly. Very badly. Awareness that not all scientists and intelligent people agree with the status quo on vaccinations. It's a week of promotion of information by those who may sound loud in certain circles (for those who have heard the debate over and over), but whose information has not been even heard by many. It's just information. We are free to choose what to do with it. I vaccinated my kids (partially, delayed), they didn't react, AND I am supportive of spreading the AWARENESS that vaccinations CAN and DOES cause horrific reactions at times. And there are ways to help prevent the likelihood of horrific reactions. If we can't even get the information out there....well, that is unreasonable. Such an emotional issue. It's just information. Information everyone should have access to, to make their own informed decisions. I know many people who do not do the reasearch and who mix in circles where it is uncool to vaccinate, where the issue has become totally emotional, so they don't. That is as negligent as ignoring the information that it can sometimes cause serious injury.

And perhaps those kids whose behaviour changes overnight after having vaccinations, and who were subsequently diagnosed autistic...are just one type of autistic, or just something we also call autistic- and while the symptoms are similar, are really quite different from those who are genetically hard wired autistic from birth. Austism is a set of characteristics that we call "autism". Why can it not have more than one cause? I do get though that there may not nothing actually "wrong"...it may be an evolutionary step or perhaps an adaptation.

I have seen medical studies contrary to that quoted above, that state the breast self examination is likely to be as accurate as mammograms before menopause (without the added risk that mammograms have of causing breast cancer due to radiation). I wouldn't stop them from one or two medical studies. Since I dont intend to get mammograms, I will continue my self examinations- but hey, they are not really that big a deal. Sometimes I wonder if many of these studies just cater to the lowest common demonination of the population. Honestly, a reasonably well educated woman is quite capable of checking every now and then for breast changes, not being too paranoid, and if there is an unusual, new lump or puckering etc, going and getting it checked out, especially if it doesnt disappear in one cycle. I feel the medical profession treats people like idiots. Sorry. And why does it take studies to convince us against noticing a lump and getting it checked out might make us live longer than NOT ever checking and even if we do have a lump, not getting it checked out? Where is the common sense in all this? Some women are really out of touch with their own breasts. It's good to squeeze them every now and then, honestly, to see what they feel like! Might save a few lives! However...I have a 16yo dd and I might consider mentioning it sometime in the next year or 2. To be honest I think she would naturally come to me if she saw anything unusual anyway, even if it was fairly minor. We all discuss health issues regularly. She is in touch with her own body pretty well. That case of the 13yo is very sad though. Poor kid.

My exercise is generally walking too...I won't go while feeling terrible, but once I am starting to feel better dh will often "take me for a walk" because a gentle walk is good for the circulation, for fresh air etc. Especially if the sun is shining too. But definitely no "pushing" of myself while sick. I am gentle with myself. Gentle exercise however is fine as long as I acutally feel like it- and sometimes dh coming along for a walk, or encouraging me, is enough to make me feel like it. I think there is a stage of illness where it is best to do very little- to really rest. Most people do NOT do that though. Then there is a later stage where it is good to gently move. Most people havent rested so they often push too hard by this stage, and often don't allow their body to recover properly. I dont think a normal exercise routine should be resumed100% until the body is 100% better. But that is different from not doing anything. I tihnk it pays to be really in touch with your own body and what it needs, rather than going by external rules. If you are getting everything your kids bring home....I would be doing something about my own health and immune system.

I am an early riser (often 5am) and I am like that by 1pm! As long as I get my couple of hours of afternoon rest and isolation, I am not too bad in the evenings. If I dont...I am often in bed before the kids. When they were younger and we did evening read aloud, I did have a fairly early bedtime for them so I could actually get through the read aloud without killing one of them for interrupting for the 10th time or wriggling too much or poking their sibling. It was our favourite time of day (now we do read aloud only during school time ). Now, I stay up till 9 when they have to turn off all electronics, and wait long enough for them to get to their rooms, and then go to bed myself and read. I spend enough time on the computer during the day that it is healthy for me to get off at 9pm too. I really dont know how mothers of many do it. Teens can be hard though. It's definitely easier on some levels...but my son will argue with the most reasonable requests and it's so exhausting. The last 3 days, every time I have found him on his computer supposedly doing schoowork, he has been on Facebook instead. I am so not built for homeschooling this particular kid at this particular stage of his development! (he is going to school- I have a few weeks left of him at home). However, sometimes he will saunter into my bedroom on his way to bed, sit on my bed, and share his day and his life with me. And I desperately want to tell him to go away, please, I need my space now...but I cant and dont want to because he is open to me, sharing with me, and I dont want to stop him doing that, ever. So I breathe, and give whatever I can muster to him, and eventually he feels satisfied and goes to bed. I love him.

Dh won't do camping either. I would but don't dig it so much without a partner...so we put the kids into Scouts instead and they do plenty. We don't do chewing gum :) We haven't done many holidays (a few good ones though). But again, the kids do Scouts and do plenty of camps. Dh and I are about to go to Bali alone for the 2nd time this year. Dh is taking dd16 to Paris next year as a coming of age present...we dont necessarily do things as a family. We refused to do weekend sports, or many sports at all. Eventually I realised ds was feeling wounded over that, and he really wanted to do soccer. So, I decided to sacrifice my Sunday mornings for it...and dh ended up coming as well frequently. We did one season, then ds was over it. Phew. They do gymnastics and Sea Scouts with all its various activities including sailing and rowing (my dd16 has muscles on her muscles) and also have done homeschool sports. We are not a sporty family. Nor do we EVER watch sport on TV. I have realised our family style is different from many. We are close. We spend lots of time together. But we also dont expect to spend weekends together doing things. We dont visit family more than a few times a year. We basically all do our own thing and virtually have done since the kids were old enough to play out on the street or ride to the local park. We all enjoy our space and independence. I imagine that has developed because dh works from home or nearby and is around a lot. So we dont have to wait till weekends to spend time with him. Weekends are when we get to spend time following our own interests. Sometimes we rarely see the kids...but mobile phones help to stay in contact.

Sounds like the OP's Dh was just doing his job. I tihnk it si perfectly appropriate for a 7th grader to be taught the historical aspect of the story. The parent is a bit out of touch, which is fine, but reality caught up with them.

Faith, I am on the other side of Australia. I have considered upgrading my naturopathy diploma to a Bachelor degree through Charles Sturt- but I would do it by correspondence. Any chance your dd can do it by correspondence, or even part of it? The thing is though, Australia is a very friendly place and she would make friends quickly. And the university would have someone whose job it is to help students in trouble. Here in Australia it is rare for people to live at university. Its just not set up like that. We tend to go to a university in our city or town, or just move and share houses/student accomodation in the same town as the university. There is not a system whereby one gets a room and food. No dormitories. It is expected that one lives independently. So yes it is normal for young people to stay living at home while going to university because that is the most affordable way to do it. It is hard to do full time university and work enough to support oneself, although many also do that and get some income from the government to help. However, it is also a lot cheaper to go to uni here than it is over there. A normal 3 year Bachelor degree is only about $20,000. And we can get low interest loans which we dont have to start paying back until we earn over $40,000 a year.

Both my kids have done Simply Music with teachers for a period of time so I am familiar with the lower levels of the system. I have 2 friends who are Simply Music teachers and my kids have several friends who play very well who have gone right through the system. I think the system is great. It teaches you to play great music from the beginning. I learned a lot. It teaches classical, blues, jazz and popular music very early on. I loved that. I wouldn't like to do it without a teacher though. My kids however did both do well with classical music and dd16 asked to change to classical after a year of Simply Music because she wanted to learn to read music more quickly than it was teaching her. She has played classicla ever since and is fine with it. Ds14 however learned classical recorder for 5 years before trying Simply Music for a year. He did well with SM but lost interest as puberty hit. The system is fun and interesting. The whole family can do it. For a kid who isnt suited to learning in the traditional classical music style, Simply Music can be great. My son is dyslexic and needed "alternative" means of learning music, although he is very musical. Simply Music can bring out talent in a kid who might be intimidated or turned off or unable to read music easily, because you learn to play through learning patterns rather than reading dots on a page- at first anyway. I think Simply Music allows a lot of people to play music who might not otherwise get to, and it has value for that alone. Not everyone wants to play classical- I myself played some simply music blues pieces and reallyenjoyed them. I was classically trained and I found that my training inhibits me in terms of being able to improvise and play popular music, wheras Simply Music opens up all areas.

Well here Down Under I am sure our various Christmas traditions seem odd- it is the middle of summer here and in most places in Australia it is stinking hot. Over the years we have done various things. As a kid we would have a BBQ for lunch- often seafood. ("throw another prawn on the barbie" is a traditional Aussie saying. Peopel often cook outside because of the heat.) We would cut off a gumtree branch and decorate it instead of a fir tree (silly fir trees- not suitable for Australia at all, especially in the middle of summer). From my childhood I have memories of lots of laughter, extended family- and rather a lot of alcohol, but no nasty behaviour. Just joviality. Dh and I only really celebrate Christmas for the kids- and we live too far from my family unfortunately, for those big family Christmases. His family are rather...staid and boring and conservative and not so fun. We often go to the beach on Christmas morning (along with plenty of other people) and then open presents, then go to his mother's for lunch, or have it at our place, or one of his brother's. His family. Its ok. Not really fun but ok. We decided last year not to do it, to stay home...but the kids told us it was boring at home and they would rather boring granmas than boring home- at least its something different. I miss my family for Christmas. We did it a few years back- all went across the country, as an uncle was dying and we wanted one last Christmas with him. But its a long way. On Boxing Day we always have a pool party at our place- lots of friends. Thats the fun part.

I love real pianos but dh bought me an electric one and it is fantastic- tuned to a grand piano so the sound is great. And it never needs tuning. I also have a keyboard with weighted keys, so it plays like a piano. You need the weighted keys otherwise you cannot put feeling into the music (because how hard you press doesnt make any difference on a non weighted key keyboard).

I might spend the time at first cleaning /decluttering the house. And playing on the computer. But I think I would make an effort to do something creative just for me, too. Such as write, paint, decorate, photograph.....and/or, do yoga, dance, garden, walk. I also might catch up with friends.

I am fine with snakes (well, I jump but am fascinated if I actually see one in the wild, and we have a pet one), and fine with mice and roaches and all those things. We live near a river and have plenty of rats around. But we have had too many shark attacks around here these last few years. I love the beach and our beautiful Indian ocean, but darned if I will stay in very long or go out very far anymore! I get jittery and I am sure sharks can smell fear! I still swim- and I don't even believe in killing the sharks- I love them in one way- but I stay close to shore and am hyperviglant about dark shadows under the water. I also do not like amusement rides. Even the ferris wheel will have me sitting on the floor of the cage and calming my breathing. I was pregnant with dd16 last time I went on a thrill ride. Dh and I thought, lets have some fun. I screamed the whole time for them to stop the ride- and I meant it- but they didn't. It was so horrible. I am a bit teh same on boats. I like to be able to see the shore, and feel I could swim there safely. I get jittery and have to soothe myself. SO, I seem to prefer solid earth under my feet. Heights get me too though not so badly if I feel the structure I am standing on is safe enough.

I have spent ages looking for something like this - it looks great. However...after using several other meal planner programs, my experience is that I tend not to use them after a while and resort back to pen and paper. How much is the fee once the free month is up ? I woudlnt want to put all the effort into setting it up unless I was pretty sure I would want to continue with it.

We always go for size because dh has a big personality and we all need space from it regularly :)