Honestly? My dd15 has always been able to work independently- she started homeschooling at age 9. But she needs some contact and interaction or it's just too lonely for her. Ds14- only this year could I say he has basically started working mostly independently. I remember asking on these boards when he was 9, 10 , 11- when will he work independently? I stopped asking eventually. Yes, he has become gradually more independent, but his problem isnt really doing the work- it's a great difficulty with reading instructions, so how the work is presented makes all the difference for him. And me going over his work with him beforehand makes a big difference. I would try and find a balance because I know that some kids might prefer to sit alone and plough through their work daily...but I honestly think thats a lonely way to live, and a bit of a cop out for the mum too. Yes, the kid might be "independent" and that is a wonderful thing. But just because one can work alone, doesnt mean one necessarily should, all day. (I do know some kids who do that and the mum is off doing other things all day). I very much value our daily together time, and the more I stay in touch with my kids' work, the better they do- who wants to just work work work, get marked, then do it again the next day? But I do realise there is that other end of the spectrum where one just wants to be able to sit down and not be "teaching" all the time, because it is exhausting. It will happen. I just dont think its good to let go of the reins completely while kids are still homeschooling.

I used to struggle with this issue a lot. Over the years I relaxed. In the end, the best curriculum that stresses everyone out, that needs too much of mum's help, that takes up too much time, that doesn't fit the child....is not as good as, I will even say, an average curriculum that gets done and doesn't cause other issues. When you have a child with learning differences you realise pretty quickly that the "best" curriculum is not always going to be the best for this child. I try to remember that this is our life too, not just preparation for the future- these are the days of their childhood they will look back upon with fond memories- or memories of a stressed and pressured mum and family life. There has to be a balance- for mum, and for child. I have a friend who has used Rod and Staff English and Saxon Maths for her two daughters, because she felt that according to TWTM, her guide, they were the best. And her daughters have done fine with them- thrived academically. In the end though, they havent gone down all the wonderful bunny trails we have in using many different English curriculums and approaches, from Ambleside to Classical Writing, English Prep, LCC, many grammar programs. Yes, I see the solidity of Rod and Staff, and I am glad for the year we spent with it...but I wouldn't swap what we have done for years with R&S. My friend also doesn't do read alouds or together work- which are our daily nourishment. Her kids work independently. Thats not how I want to do thngs and I am very happy to make compromises in curriculum to try and keep us engaged and interested.

Lol, normally I know what it means but for a minute there I was thinking, whoa, wearing lingerie at the dinner table- with kids around? (we often call dinner tea here)- gotta open that thread. No lingerie here...it's pajamas or nothing at all. But....well, I would get rid of the mindset that 38 is getting up there and soon to be past it as far as lingerie is concerned. Its all in your mind. Maybe your taste in lingerie would change but you don't need to shrivel up and get old any time soon :)

I don't find it too extreme. I might dispute the details of what they consider healthy (and there are so many points of view about that and no one correct one), but I think its laudable to take such a strong stand, and its great that the kids won't be bringing junk food because of peer pressure, and that they can go through a whole school day without blood sugar swings. I haven't read the other responses but I would be happy if a school my kids attended had a healthy food rule. I have quite a problem with kids eating junk foods through school canteens and then sharing with each other- and as a parent, then feeling obliged to pack something junky in my kids' lunchbox so that they dont feel "left out". The peer group pressure issues around food are huge. The only reason it seems so extreme is because of how far astray we have gone as a society around food and nutriton. We are still riding on past generations of generally decent diets....but it doesn't take too many generations of the sort of diets our kids are being brought up on in the average home, to basically make the human race infertile. It happens to rats- give it another few decades and it will happen to us. I am a food cop myself. The more nutrition I can get into my kids, the more they have in their systems when they reproduce, and future generations have a chance. Just because one or two generations can actually survive on white flour and trans fats and white sugar, doesn't mean our nutritional bank won't bankrupt itself eventually. I dont take the issue lightly and I think people can be way too small minded about it. Sometimes it takes an extreme approach to bring some balance. What seems common sense to one person is ridiculous to another, so on this issue, I think "common sense" woudl mean the same problems they are trying to avoid.

I am not and have not been in that position, although I lived for years on very little- it was before kids. I lived very simply, and sometimes didn't have a home and lived in a cave at one point, and crashed on peoples' sofas at another. They were my lowest points- mostly, I just lived very, very simply. I just wanted to give you a big :grouphug: If you search for similar threads here, lots of people have suggestions for websites that show how to stretch your $. Or you could google for them. I have no idea how you live on nothing though, other than grow your own food, hunt in the wild, fish, and do exchanges with others for essentials. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

We have pretty traditional roles, but dh taught ME to love shopping. If he misses his weekend swap meet fix he gets very distressed! He loves to come home with his "kill" and show the family (well, we usually go too but if we dont, we all have to gather around and congratulate him when he comes home, on his bargains :) ). He is also very good at fixing things around the house and likes the house to be neat and tidy and will do a fair bit toward that. I havent managed to convince him yet that not bringing home so much STUFF would make it easier to keep the house tidy, but I am working on it. He had a perfectionist mum who taught him to clean and to keep his stuff tidy. He hangs all his clothes except socks and underwear. He has more clothes than any man I know. He has to have his own bathroom. It's just best. As far as taking care of the kids goes...its pretty traditionally split, though. I do 95% of it.

Dh used to be a business man and he taught me that being late is a definite sign of disrespect. I didn't used to think of it that way....but nowadays, even though I can belate myself sometimes, I do get irritated by chronic lateness. I think being late is a way of saying " my time is more important than yours". However, I think most people can be responsive to being told. In dh's work, which is running therapy type groups, he got to the point of not letting people in who came late. He trained his clients to come on time and to respect others by not being chronically late. We teach others how to treat us.

I dont think it was. I have sent you a PM.

I would back off. I have a B and sometimes C grade student with ocasional brilliant moments (academically- his strengths are more social), and an A grade student who is B in math. I think it's worth checking with ourselves every now and then whether we want our students to be top students purely for their own benefit- or for our own glory to some extent. It's quite humbling to have a student who is never going to be a top student or who writes messily no matter what, or can't memorise their times tables. I would say that getting angry might be a sign that we are not quite clear who this is for (I've done it!). It feels so much more gratifying when our kids shine, but for many, getting a lot less than A might be their own brand of shine in that area, and having a parent who wants A grade shine in all areas could be quite disheartening. I'm sure we've all done it.

We rent a very interestngly designed house. Upstairs is a kitchen, dining room and living area, and a 3 bedroom wing with 2 bathrooms. We turned this living area into the schoolroom but its also teh day to day TV, piano, office, and living area- very multifunctional and central and well used. We have 3 large desks- one for me, one for the kids. Downstairs is a large entrance way (marble) with the marble staircase coming from it, a ginormous laundry(the size of a bedroom- how did I ever survive with a tiny laundry? I love it!), another large living area, a kind of library room, a large den that has opaque windows, and a spare bedroom. Dh works from the downstairs living area. Both the kids live downstairs now- one has teh spare room, the other had the den. The spare room upstairs is now my art room. I love the design of our house.

Seeing if this works (photo). My ds14 didnt ask. He just jumped off a cliff with his friends. At least yours asked!

My girl is easy as pie. She was born first to prepare me and dull me into a false sense of security that I really was a great mother and this is fun and beautiful. Then came my boy. If I had had him first, not sure I would have had any more kids :)

Yes, and Cambridge is secular. Dd did their 3rd book with them. My experience was that one would still need to be self motivated and probably supervised well by a parent. They don't hold you hand very much or give a lot of feedback...they mark the work, and you can ask questions. I really like Cambridge though- the stories are interesting and there is a lot of cultural knowledge in there too.

We are pretty blunt about things like that in our family. I feel it keeps things pretty real. The kids hear their dad talking about his mum being a pain in the *ss, and then see him spending time with her doing something for her, and they also know she doesnt spend much time with them and then brings them huge easter eggs...relationships and people are complicated and I feel the kids can handle the complexity of both loving their granma, seeing us annoyed with her, and acknowledging that she has a difficult life and doesnt have much time for them (she has a disabled daughter at home)...its all part of family life. Its good not to completely catagorise people..make sure we see them as multi faceted and capable of a range of behaviours, or at least their difficult past etc...but acknowledging the less pleasant sides of people is part of life.

I ticked all except allergens, but on 2nd thoughts I should have checked that too since dh has become wheat sensitive and we now eat spelt bread. Ds14 is allergic to cows milk but still insists on drinking it so I cant really count that. Maybe I shouldnt have counted the bacteria one. If I buy organic, I often dont even wash it (or I rinse it minimally) because I think we dont get enough bacteria in our systems from the soil. We are meant to be bacteria colony breeding grounds- it helps our immune systems. I am not germ phobic because I think we all need a bit of dirt and bacteria in our diet. But we havent had the issues you have had over there with spinach etc, and I dont mean the type of bacteria that grows on meat or dairy that is left out overnight :) If I buy conventional produce, I wash it well, but its more for the pesticide residue than the dirt. (except I don't like dirt in my spinach- blech).

Ive been like that for years now and my kids are teens. After trying really, really hard, and coming from a place of fear of failing my kids, I realised I wanted these years of our lives together to be memorable in a good way....not just mum pushing really hard, nagging, and days of drudgery! In a way, I felt it would be better if they wre at school because at least when they came home, or on weekends, we could do fun things. I have found my way. Lots of fun. We still get school done by early afternoon. For me the key has been regular routine and stability and consistency...but not long hours. It has worked for us.

Loved it. I have two non Christian kids rather sensitive to being preached at and are rather vocal about it. Nothing preachy whatsover in The Bronze Bow. Its probably what most of us non Christians would actually want from a story about Jesus. Great story and very touching.

We go through a LOT of fruit around here. Ds14 is always hungry, but he is also very fussy. He doesnt want much in the way of healthy food. He wont eat wholemeal bread- only white. He literally wont eat it if its wholemeal. But, he will make his own pasta, and he will eat many pieces of fruit in a day. I make him raw vegetable platters to eat while watching TV. I do buy him filler food like corn chips and dead white bread. I know he needs the calories. I just try to balance it with fruit and veg.

I do it. The kids have to be sitting at their desks by 8.30am, all chores done, dressed and breakfasted, piano practice done. Easy as long as everyone is up by 7am- and thats the deal. Dd15 tends to be slack (long morning showers)- if she cant be ready by 8.30 am, she has to get up by 6.30 for a while. Then we just work steadily. We dont have official morning tea or even lunch breaks. They just stop whenever they need to and grab a snack, and at midday either I make them something or they make themselves something. We do "togther work" for an hour or so in the middle of the morning. I dont do housework during schooltime- I am in the room with them, available. I tend to "need" an afternoon rest time- I have a kind of chronic fatigue that comes and goes. Afternoon rests make all the difference. So...early afternoon I just go to my room. That means the kids are on their own. They can handle it. Dd continues whatever she is doing at her desk, usually, or reads. Ds usually leaves his reading till last, but also works quickly and is often finished by then. We have pretty much always done it this way. I never "made" them have afternoon rests but they were older. If they were younger, I would have done it the way SWB suggests. As it is, they know to leave me alone and they do. To me...its a priority because on the days I really need a rest, if I dont get one..I am a right off for the rest of the day. We are not the most academic family, but we do do our daily work and it gets done, consistently. I do know my limitations in regards to how much I can help the kids and in what subjects. Compromises are made at times, but we are consistent in our routine. I suggest you just do it. If it makes a difference in your quality of life- if it makes you a nicer mommy, it's worth a little sacrifice here and there, surely? You just have to make it a priority, like doing Maths, and then it will happen.

Lol Melissa. I live in Perth but I come from Sydney and have been to Darwin, Brisbane, Ulururu, the coast of QLD up to Cairns etc. So I guess I feel qualified. Yes, it would have been 10.30 am when you wrote that- here on the west coast :) . You need to check the time zones- plenty of help online. Well, a student could probably survive on $20 a day for food, but $30 would be nice :) For Uluru, 2 days would be enough. 3 would be nice and 5 might be too much unless you are a desert lover. There are huge, vast spaces and long hours of bus driving. It is beautiful in its own way, and there should be wildflowers starting around then...but still. Uluru is an awesome big rock- nearby are the Olgas, also awesome big rocks. Depends how long she feels she wants to hang out around awesome big rocks. For me, I could spend a week or two there- most tourists, I think a couple of days is enough. Surrounding are more vast spaces of desert. But thats how you get a feeling for what Australia is- a vast country full of vast deserts, with most of the population on the skinny stretch of coastline.

I dotn personally think Brisbane or Darwin are very tourist worthy, but there are places nearby both cities (inland from the Gold Coast for Brisbane, and Kakadu nature reserve for Darwin) that are definitely worth it. Sydney is a tourist worthy city. She is arriving in the middle of our winter. In Sydney, that is fairly cold- never snowy cold, but sometimes down to almost 0 degrees celcius at night and up to the high teens during th day. ALthough, weather is so wacky nowaday,s it could be warmer too. Defintely warm jacket weather. Uluru and Alice Springs can get really cold that time of year too. Cna be warm and sunny dring the day, but with a biting wind at times, and definitely cold at night, and possible rain at that time of year. The Whitsundays/Capricorn coast would be beautiful and much warmer that time of year. Lovely place to be during winter here :) Swimming and sailing all possible that tme of year. Its also warmer in Brisbane. For temperatures, it can all be googled. Other touristy places are further north at Cairns, the Snowy Mountans near Canberra (snow at that time of year, most likely), and over here on the west coast- the south west coast here is beautiful, as is Coral Bay up north, where there is a world class tropical reef that comes right up to the beach. Overall, if they are visiting both Sydney and Whitsundays, they will need a range of clothes- bathers and summer wear, as well as warm winter wear. Also, it will be rainy some places and times and dry others. Australia is a big country and the weather varies a lot.

Someone has a good sense of humour, surely!

Its not something we have a philosophy about- how or when to give. We just know that giving is the stuff of life. We dont give a lot financially to others in need, very often. But we give in other ways. And sometimes giving financially just comes up. We bought MIL's airfare to Bali- she needed our help to buy the ticket online and it just happened. We gave $10 to an aborigine on the street last week, who needed it for a beer- yes, really. Because sometimes thats just what you do- it feels like the right thing to do at the time. And the guy came and hugged us both with so much enthusiasm and joy for the simple spontaneous act, we felt blessed. The whole thing about "not telling" is just to avoid pride, but you can have pride about "not telling" just the same as you can have no pride and just tell. Who cares.

I feel better if I look good - and yoga pants are fine so I woudl and do wear thm out and about. I don't get though why people would worry so much about what other people think - if someone is out in "sweats", well, that's their business. I cant really say whethe it "acceptable" or not- I dont feel thats a judgement I am really fit to make. It seems like its a moral judgement on people. People do what they do. I haven't seen too many people out in pajamas except in their front yards so its not an issue- and many pajamas are kind of humerous (dh has pink pajamas with blue hippos on them), not to mention "modest", compared to what a lot of people wear in the name of clothes. If I saw someone in pajamas doing the shopping, I would probably feel sorry for them that they don't understand social cues so well. I never have, though.

I would have made a good unschooler, I think. I would have been self motivated to read and study. I read and study now- I might not have been balanced, but I would have been motivated to learn. I wonder how many of us feel we would have been self motivated....and yet our kids are not, particularly- or at least, we never gave them the chance because we were so inspired by classical homeschooling ouselves...we kind of took over. Its something I have often wondered about- if I have undermined my own kids' instincts to learn...by forcing them to learn. Or if they would never have been self motivated to the extent I was.