Yup. I dont have a problem with informality in that regard and mostly in Australia, kids address adults by their first names except at school. I have found in homeschooling circles that are mainly concervative Christian, some mums teach their kids to call me Mrs Last Name- but it is a little annoying because I dont have the same surname as my kids anyway, so I dont think of myself that way anyway.

Um....you can't dismiss a study because of your neighbour. even if the study is not a brilliant one. Thats like saying that because your grandfather lived to 100 and he smoked like a chimney, there is nothing to all the studies that statistically link smoking with lung cancer. I am not saying the bra study was necessarily a conclusive one- I was just presenting some information for consideration. Since most women wear bras, I don't think isolated cases warrant dismissal of the whole concept and connection- I prefer to have all the information I can when making decisions about my health.

Modesty is not really the issue for me, I dont think- as far as I am concerned, my breasts are natural and I dont have beliefs that suggest I need to hide them for anything but social reasons. I cover them because I dont want the attention, and I wear a bra under tshirts etc so as not to attract attention. I prefer if I am talking to a guy especially, that he looks at my face, not my chest. That's about it - its not a moral or modesty issue- it's an adaptation to the rather screwed up society we live in. I dont have a problem with nudity though, either- but I am not going to walk down the street naked. I have been away for the weekend. I am amazed this thread is still going!

Oh yeah, I can so relate :lol::lol::lol: On the other hand, on my better days....I would just say I am hurt and leave it up to him to make of it what he will. But yes, I do think its important to be able to say," I am hurt" and not 2nd guess yourself.

Oh yes.....lots and lots of patience :) Good luck :) It also happens to be a very interesting time with kids- or at least, I find it so. You can have some wonderful conversations. I think those conversations are an important part of moulding who they are becoming- they need to be able to "think out loud" and bounce off you. Just be prepared for them to disagree just for the sake of it. It doesn't mean what you say doesnt go in there somewhere, though. They just no longer necessarily believe it just because you said so. I think thats important, otherwise we are just breeding sheep to feed to the system, and they will substitute our authority with the next. They need to be able to think for themselves- and guess who they need to practice on :)

I find the chemical smell of Lynx deodorant that my son uses worse than the smell of sweat on him and his clothes- and thats saying something. It seems all his clothes smell of Lynx. I think he sprays his clothes with it instead of washing them. I dont mind a bit of a sweaty smell. I am not super sensitive to smells- as in, not so easily offended by them. Dh is- he will get stirredup at the slightest pong. I try and help him by telling him I like him smelling a bit sweaty :) I often wonder how people in western society from past centuries managed to handle smells. What about in England when they bathed only rarely? I am sure it mst be something we get used to, either way.

I have it in one of my ds14's workbox drawers ready to go after our Easter break. I didnt know there was a workbook though. Ugh. I will probably buy that now! I havent read it. I just saw it on my shelf and decided he was probabyl ready for it.

For many years we have had many, many activities going on each week. Music lessons for both kids, various regular homeschool activities, art classes, science classes, gymnastics, Scouts. The only weekend thing has been Scouts until last winter when I allowed ds14 to play soccer for a season and I had to take him to Sunday moring matches all over the place. I was willing to do it for a season since he wanted it, but I generalyl try to keep weekends free, because I need downtime. I was also in a band for 2 years and that involved weekend practices. Yes, it was exhausting, but I dont regret it at all. We could afford it, and it make homeschooling work for my two extremely social, outgoing kids. Now, its a different season. The kids have part time jobs they get to themselves. Ds just bought himself a really good bike and can ride place that before I needed to drive him to. Both can catch public transport now. Ds has quit all music lessons. We dropped all homeschooling classes as they outgrew them, including science. Scouts/ Venturers is the one big thing we keep doing, and that often takes a couple of evenings and a weekend day each week- sometimes more, someties less. Its whee th kids socialise now. Dd15 is away on a 12 day camp at the moment. Ds14 is on a 4 da one next week. There are seasons. I found I needed to keep 4 mornings a week free to get enough school done, but some times it was only 3. Yes- dh encourages me NOT to take on more work. I do work part time, from home, but I often crave to set up my practice again or do something else. Particularly now that the kids are out of the house so much, doing their own thing. But....a regular job, even one day a week, is a big committment, and if it burns you out and the homeschooling suffers- and you dont absolutely need to do it for the money- I would consider carefully.

Absolutely! I dont sag very much- certainly more than when younger but not a lot. and for some reason I went from a B to a C cup after I finished breastfeeding for 5 years- but I honestly don't think all the sag in the world would entice me to be uncomfortable very day. Those pictures of native people are in my head also...but honestly, how different are they from us? We just cover up and wear bras, so we dont see ourselves. If you see pictures of older women's booKs online, most sag. So what? As Joanne commented, its time to let go of our youth worshipping culture. I read about an anthropologist who visited one of those native cultures, and she wrote that the young women walked around pulling on their own booKs in order to get them to sag more quickly- because in those cultures, age is revered, not youth. We have it all screwy. For those who wear bras at night time as well as all day- google bras and breast cancer. There is some information about lymph drainage that I think it is important you should have at least read about, to make informed decisions. There are apparently no valid scientifc studies, but there have been large studies. And for a long tme, there were no scientifically valid studies linking smoking and lung cancer, either,and people scoffed at the idea. Here is one article: http://www.all-natural.com/bras.html BTW I am entirely heartened by this thread. I really thought I am a freakishly rare woman who hates wearing a bra with a passion. I am surprised and quite thrilled that there are so many of us who secretly don't wear bras under our winter cothes, and don't wear them at home.

For us its a balance between routine and predictability, which ds14 thrives on, and the flexibility to take time off on a bad day. Generally, he works when sick, unless very sick. Those spaced out, unable to focus days though...yes, sometimes they are partially written off. We would never go past 6 hours though. School generally takes 4-5 hours. If it drags on and on...for ds, that usually means something is up, because he likes to get his work over and done and he tends to rush rather than linger and drag. I sometimes take those "off " days to watch a movie related to history, or a documentary- which generally, I don'y tend to do as often as I shoudl. I have a whole lot of things saved on cable TV for this very purpose but too often, I push through instead.

I just put my ds14 into yet another handwriting book. It's for younger kids than him but its not babyish at all.(Its a local Australian book ising Victorian Cursive). His handwriting has been pretty bad- suddenly, he is actually writing beautifully and taking care- developing a pride in his handwriting. I think it's just a brain maturity thing and it happens when it happens, if ever. I would have generally thought we would be finished with handwriting by now, but he is dyslexic....and I feel it is great for his fine motor skills to just plod away. I dont think its the end of the world either way. I just felt to continue and so far, so good.

Rats- can I have a whine first? I have been planning to go away to a music festival this weekend- on my own- in our new (small) motorhome. Dh and I have been making it nice for me and I have been so excited. I was due to leave tomorrow morning- we just took it for a short run. And it broke down. Could be miraculously fixed tomorrow...unlikely though. Probabyl needs major gear box repairs. I could tent it. I am not happy about that. Dont feel like going now, even though I bought my ticket. I am not happy right now. You could say I am sulking. On the bright side...I am thankful that it didn't breakdown while I was driving TO the music festival. If anyone feels like joining me in praying for the van to be fixed quickly tomorrow, please feel free. OK, I have a lot of other thngs to be thankful for- a beautiful family, food in my belly, a new art room for me, health, dental work today...a compassionate husband who feels VERY sorry for me right now. I do want to stamp my foot a bit more, though.

Too much media does tend to breed bad attitudes- you might want to put some limits on that. I want to be the nice guy. I love those beautiful days when its all sweet and we get our workdone, or we do lovely educational outing, and everyone i happy. We have good conversations and I feel like a good mummy. Then there's the rest of the time. The kdis dont want to do their work. They leave dirty dishes in the schoolroom. They have a stinking attitude. They whine and try to get out of lots of things. Ds spend months wanting to quit Souts- Iwould have let him but dh woulndt- and now ds is happy he didnt quit. He played an instrument for 5 years and wanted to quit- I just let him quit recently becase I was tired of nagging him to practice, but he is gifted musically and I am glad we hung in there for 5 years- its a goodfoundation. You just have to be the tough guy sometimes too. I couldnt count the number of times ds has threatened that he wanted to go back to school because the work I give him is too hard. I couldnt count the number of times I changed curriculum because he didnt like what I was using for him. I couldnt cout the number of times I have let him off work because of his whining. In the end, a lot of what I did was not to his benefit, let alone mine- it was only to keep the short term peace. I am not a pushover but I was too soft. Recently, I did tell him he could go back to school- I called his bluff- and he panicked. We worked out a system where he gets more say in his work, and is also more accountable. I do negotiate- but only up to a point. Hang in there and do teh tough boundary setting work- and stick by your boundaries- and things shoudl get easier. You have to be willing to be the bad guy, to not be liked, to do what you know is best rather than keep the short term peace and give in. Then, it does actually get more peaceful.

I am personally not convinced about the sagging issues. If you wear a bra, you are not toning or training the muscles and fibres that do support you. You do their job for them with a bra. So then when you don't wear a bra...flopsies. I am a C cup and at 42 not doing too badly at all- definitely not pointing downwards yet! And I never wear a bra when I dont feel I need to- at least half the year. As a teen, I was a rebel and never wore a bra. My aunt told me I would get breast cancer if I didnt- I was smart enough to know she didnt know what she was talking about. And I have seen plenty of articles over the years to suggest you are more likely to get breast cancer if you do wear a restrictive bra because of the blockage of lymph drainage. How does anyone really know if their booKs went south quicker because they didn't habitually support them ? it may seem "obvious" but I am not convinced because of my own experience. And really, I would certainly sacrifice perkey booKs if it meant being comfortable versus being uncomfortable every. single. day. Really- the things we do for vanity! Now, I do undnerstand the comfort issue for those more well endowed, and that's a personal issue. I have a cousin who has told me more than once, Never, Ever wish for big booKs.

I would just buld a solid relationship with her, without coming on too strong.

I'm not small (C cup), and I hate to wear a bra. In winter,with a layer or two of clothing, I can usually get away with not wearing one, particularly if I wear a tight fitting singlet or supportive top. In summer, I wear one when I go out- I really don't like people looking at my chest rather than my face- but I love summer dresses that have support so that I dont have to wear a bra as well. I absolutely refuse to wear underwire bras. Evil things. I bought one last year- $70 mind you, properly fitted, and it took to age 42 to do it- and I wore it once. Recently I ripped the wire out, but I still havent worn it. I dont care if my booKs reach my knees, I am not going to wear something that makes me uncomfortable. The same as I refuse, absolutely, to wear high heels or anything on my feet that is remotely uncomfortable. I do NOT compromise on comfort and ease when it comes to dressing my body- and I still like looking good! My dd15 on the other hand, loves her bras, and loves those fancy push up ones. She also loves her stillettos and has a huge uncomfortable shoe collection. Must be her father's genes, honestly. :lol:

Its probably different for different people. It may be just my kids, but my girl can multi task perfectly well, yet my boy can not so well. Read aloud time is still our favourite time of the day. Ds14 eats. Dd15 draws and paints. Over the years, ds has eaten a lot :) and dd has sketch books full of amazing drawings and paintings. I wouldnt have her give up that daily hour or so of art time for anything- she listens, she can narrate back and answer questions and give her opinion. And its a joy for her to do her art at the same time. I think that different parts of the brain are probabyl used, and thats why many kids can doodle and listen at the same time, and it has apparently worked for many ADD kids to do that. They get to use their hands and engage one part of their brain that wants kinasthetic movement...and it allows the other part, the one you want to engage- to engage more easily. It make sense to me. I wouldnt spoil my kids enjoyment of our read aloud time by being rigid about sitting still and making eye contact. There is a time for that, but we are at home, in a relaxed environment, not a school. But each family and different children are different...if my kids couldn't listen and eat/draw at the same time, I would handle it differently. I would probably not read for so long at a time.

Never, never, never give up on a child. And never underestimate the power of your mother's love for your child. In a way, it doesn't matter what their behaviour is like. Of course it's our job to guide. But our main job is to love, love, love, not correct, correct, correct.

:iagree: The kid is 5. He's shy. Thats ok. He doesn't need to be "pushed" out of his shyness. It's not a pathology to feel anxious around people at age 5, or even to be extremely shy. Some people are just like that. I would protect him from being overwhelmed by what he finds fearful, and slowly, gently, let him grow up in his own time, in his own way, under your wing. He will learn toovercome his shyness in his own way, as life presents opportunities that seem too fun to hold back from. My 3year old went to 4 year old kindergarten (the year he turned 4). He screamed every day until I pulled him out- eventually I pulled himout of school too- he is now a very secure and socially confident teenager. Being forced into a situation that is too uncomfortable for a child, a sensitive child, is more likely to CREATE pathologies than prevent them. What is so wrong with gentle, protective loving of our kids? Why do we need to toughen up our small people? Is that the world we want for them- that they all become tough, learn to push down their feeings ? Homeschooling does not mean one is at home all day, over protected from modern society. Your son will go to classes, will meet the extended family, will meet the plumber when he turns up to fix the toilet, will meet the shop assistants when he goes shopping with you, have friends...homeschooling is still in the world. It's just not forcing a child into the rough world of institionalised schooling. How many of us have emotional scars from that sort of attitude? Dont give up your authority as mother and as an intellignt, intuitive person, to a paediatrician who has been educated by a system that does not take good care of individuals, and who cant possibly know your son as well as you do. I dont understand why U.S. people seem toall go to paediatricians- I have never taken my kids to one- why on earth have we given up our natural parenting insitncts to people like that?

Flea treatment and worm treatment as needed, including regular heartworm treatment. Shots as puppies- none since. BIL is a vet...handy but we've only ever used him for puppy shots. Ideally I would get distemper shorts every few years, but I dont. No rabies in Australia. As far as I am concerned, vets and dentists need to make a living, so they set up check-up schedules that keep the money pouring in. Takes a lot of money to pay off those student loans! Excuse my cycnicism but I took my rabbit to the vet because I was concerned about her and $200 later, I was none the wiser, and the vet wanted me to spend hundreds of $ more. She did die shortly after, but honestly, if I had spent all that money, I think she would have died anyway, and as much as I love my rabbits, I am not spening $1000 on one, particularly a fairly old one. And dentists- don't get me started. These people run businesses. They need to make money, and they charge ridiculousy high fees for often very basic tasks. Its their bread and butter. Don't fall for feeling guilty that you don't do what they say. I am not saying that many or most dont have integrity, but its the same with doctors- they are educated institutionally, and fed the information they are fed, often by vested interests. Do your own research, look up natural health care for dogs, give them the best diet you can afford (which will be raw rather than processed and cooked) and go from there.

Yes, many positive comments. I dont think I have hever had a direct negative comment- our neighbour, a school teacher, did make the comment that teenagers need to be in highschool to socialise- but I just brushed that off. I have had people ask me questions very scepticaly- I know they are not convinced- but never a direct negative comment. I am sure I will get one now that I have said that...but the positive comments woudl still far outweigh the negative.

I would friend her. I have a personal rule not to friend people I don't know in real life, but thats more because of the fact I spend a lot of time of message boards and I dont want to include message board friends on Facebook. I also have that rule for my dd15. But in your case, I would make an exception- you havent met her YET but she is your brother's most beloved...she has reached out to you...of course you should accept her.

Another possibility is to consume raw local honey from your area- it's a way of building immunity in small doses, to the pollens in your area. Google honey allergies for more info.

What is the seed fibre- flax seed? Psyllium? They will certainly add some texture. If its psyllium, you can mix it into plain water and skull it down...it doesnt taste like anything. If its flaxseed...you can put in on your cereal, mix it with fruit...or blend it with your smoothie to make it smooth first Dont leave it for long before drinking, though, because it swells quickly. I think green powders are a great way to get extra nutrition- if it has much spirulina in it though, its not going to taste very good.I take spirulina intable form- cant stand the taste. I can handle grasses- they taste...grassy. I like fresh orange juice with a tsp of barley or wheat grass powder stirred into it. Its probably an aquired taste, but its doable for me. I think our western food acclimatised taste buds need a bit of stretching, but you have to do it in baby steps. I would say doing both seeds and green powder in a juice would be a lot for someone to handle, who wasnt already used to that sort of thing. Rather than give up altogether, something would be better than nothing- keep the seeds out and find another way to ingest them? Halve or quarter the amount of powder till you get used to it? You mght find putting it all in a blender, rather than stirring, gives it an easier texture. If it makes you feel any better, yesterday I made a disgusting green smoothie. I forgot that the green leaf mix I bought had a large percentge of rocket in it...I love rocket, but I dont like my green smoothies spicy and hot! It really spoilt the joy for me! However, I got it down. I have been known to throw out bad tasting ones- I tried to use grapfruit with the pith and skin once, in a juice...that was undrinkable. Yet lemon with pith and skin is fine. You live and learn.

Never...until now. We just moved dds14 into the downstairs den...and it has a TV and his gaming computer there. Its a compromise.....and its been a couple of weeks and I dont think he has turned the TV on yet (we have one in the family/schoolroom which he watches). He does do gaming but he has to turn it off by 9pm and so far, he does. I'm not sure I would have allowed it earlier though. In fact, come to think of it, dh and Iwere clear before now that we didn't think it was a good idea- ds wanted to move downthere for the last year or two. Then suddenly, it seems like a good idea. I am not sure what changed...we just felt it was time. (Having a private adult wing of the house may have been a contributing factor :) ) Weve set a lot of boundaries around TV/computers over the years. Finding a balance for your family is important, and it can change over time. There are some programs the kids and I enjoy to watch together- I am not sure I would be happy if ds withdrew to his room to watch those same programs alone- but, he hasnt so it not an issue.