Since mid-April we have been having gorgeous weather in Warsaw Poland. Sunny and 60s-70s every day. I think I just really appreciate the sun more, since we barely saw it for 5 months. Spring/summer here seems to be just absolutely amazing weather. Almost makes up for those dreary winter months.

I had a similar thing that led me to being less anxious for awhile, but unfortunately I think I have slipped back into my anxious ways. About two years ago my oldest ds got his drivers permit and I had taken him for his first long drive and it made me so anxious. Later that evening he was playing baseball and collapsed on the field. I really thought he was going to to die (he is totally fine). I thought at the time I had been worried about the wrong thing- I never thought of baseball as being “dangerous.” And I realized that bad things can happen at anytime and being anxious doesn’t stop them from happening and it really did help me worry less for awhile. I try really hard to fight it, but I think I am just waiting to breath that sigh of relief in about 10 years when all my kids will be 21+ and I know they are “ok.”

I have definitely gotten more anxious as I have gotten older. I think I am just not as naive as I once was. Plus, I currently have 3 teenagers and while they are great, I just feel like I have more to worry about than when they were little. I had more control over their lives back then, which made me less anxious.

One other thing I wonder about is if I would have made the same choices if I would have known I had a choice. I was raised in a church that preached women staying home with their kids was their calling. So, I got married young and had 4 babies in my 20s and homeschooled until my oldest went to high school. I actually don’t regret any of that, but I mostly just did it because it was what I thought I had to do. I guess I didn’t only do it because I thought I had to. I really loved all those years home with my kids, but also, I never even thought of living a different life.

What a great idea! I love this

Yes all the time. And I don’t know that it is good for me. For the most part I am grateful for the choices I made and I really appreciate my life. My main thing I wonder about is if we should have stayed in one place for my kids childhoods. We have lived in 6 places and in some ways that has been amazing. But other times I worry that I have messed up my kids- or myself. It is hard to really know people when you move every 2-3 years. I especially wonder about our move to Europe, where we currently are. I think it has mostly been good- a once in a lifetime opportunity. But, I think we are missing out on things at home.

I locked one of my kids in his room at night. I hadn’t realized it was controversial. Who thinks it is safe for a toddler to be wandering around the house while his parents are sleeping? But, yes, I know some people frown upon the practice. Maybe I would have too, if I had only had my other three kids who always willingly stayed in their rooms all night.

Yes. Just yesterday I decided to make popsicles with the juice we got at the farmers market, and I had such a feeling of nostalgia for the summers my kids were little. I almost had to stop pouring the juice. This is the last summer I will have all minor children, so I am trying hard to live in this season. I know I will miss this one day too. But, for sure, I loved the days of all little kids eating homemade popsicles and playing in the sprinkler.

I am so very sorry.

This is our first summer in Europe, and honestly we have nothing exciting planned. The kids have a very short summer break from school, and this international school has been a big adjustment for them. I think they are looking forward to doing a bunch of nothing. Plus, we aren’t in an English speaking country so there aren’t too many kids camps and activities outside of school. DS17 is playing on the semi pro baseball team and working full time. Also hopefully he will be doing some things to get ready for college. The younger three will hopefully take advantage of living in such a walkable/bikeable area and spend some time exploring. I’m also planning to take them on a day trip once a week. I would also like to take a trip or two, but we traveled quite a bit during the school breaks and now I feel like we need to save some money. But, if oldest ds and dh stay here to work, that saves money 😀

I think you have gotten great advice (of course). She has been very lucky to have you for all of these weeks. I’m in the camp that it will be good for her to learn to do things on her own. Maybe you can go each afternoon so she can nap? Can you wait until they are 3 months old? I feel like that is a bit of a turning point. My dh was deployed when I had a 3yr, 1yr, and newborn and it was really hard. All three of them cried sometimes and I felt guilt and anxiety about it, but that was our life. The newborn was by far my hardest baby. I would have loved to have help, but being on my own I figured it out in a way I wouldn’t have been able to with help. I learned which balls could drop- we needed clean laundry and dishes, but other cleaning could get put off a bit. We ate super simple meals. Those kids are now 13, 14, and 16 and all are doing well.

I think this is so wise to remember. I feel like we have had quite a few adventures, but just this morning I was feeling guilty because I don’t think I have given my kids roots. It is birthday season around here and I guess I use those milestones to look back at all of my regrets 😀. You can’t have everything and there are so many ways to build a solid homeschool/life.

I think that age is very hard if you don’t know what he is into and I’m not sure of your price range. My ds13 wants new rollerblades, Lego, vinyl player, crocs, and an electric skateboard. He also likes food, tickets to sporting events, and art supplies. He also plays several sports so he can always use new sports equipment. He got water balloons in his Easter basket (the easy fill kind) and he liked those. He also got a flying orb for Christmas that he plays with pretty frequently.

Thank you! My kids are used to grands biscuits and the pioneer gravy mix, but we can’t get that where we live now, so I will try making this. Biscuits and gravy from scratch is one my 23 for 23 items.

I buy books and board games. Buying things I need does not relieve my stress

I feel like I have been struggling with anxiety more lately. I perhaps need to do something more about it, but it also makes me wonder if any mom lives without anxiety. I think mine is worse now because my kids are ages 11-16 and there is just so much to worry about at this age besides the normal things. I have friends who say they “have anxiety” and I guess I am just wondering if anyone lives without anxiety- particularly moms. We did travel to Morocco this year and I think there seemed to be less anxiety there. My impression (from the little bit I saw) was that they were more aware that they do not have control in life, so they just didn’t worry.

Yay! Congratulations

Ds17 has had a headache each day around 2:00 for the last 5 days. He said it is throbbing above his right eye, makes him dizzy, and is the worst headache he has ever had (I actually don’t remember him ever complaining about a headache before, but I am sure he has had some). The first two he was at school, then at home, then the next two he was at a baseball game or practice. The weather has definitely changed in the last week from winter to spring. He does get stressed about school, I think. I have of course had headaches in my life, but no one in our family is prone to headaches. He has taken Advil each time and it has worked. I’m just wondering where we should go from here. I can take him to the dr here, but since we are new we don’t have much of a relationship there. I’m kind of hoping to have some idea before we go.

I am going for an ultrasound tomorrow after a weird pap. I think I am almost ready to just take out all these organs- it causes me so much anxiety with the mammograms and paps and ultrasounds. So, I think I would definitely do the hysterectomy.

We are living in Europe right now, so we went skiing in Slovakia in January and that was fun, except the drive there was quite treacherous. Then we went to Morocco in February and there was snow for the first time in 6 years, which was great, but also made for a treacherous drive across the high Atlas Mountains. I am ready to just stay home for awhile. I for sure want to go to London and Spain before we move, but we have a couple of years. Having to pay for college and buy a house when we get back is making me want to put all of our extra money into savings rather than travel.

It is so hard to know what is “normal” anxious vs not. Of course moms want to do the safest thing for their kids, and it is really hard to assess the risk of various sleep options I think. I am currently trying to decide which dented cans need to be thrown away because I don’t want my family to get botulism, but I am pretty sure my neighbors think I am crazy for even thinking about that 😀

That would be ideal, and he did when we first moved, but he is taking Spanish at school and I think that is what he wants his second language to be. The school wouldn’t let him take Polish because he moved here in 11th grade and they said 10th grade is the last year to start. He goes to an English speaking school and he plays on a Polish baseball team, but they all speak English so he doesn’t really have enough immersion.

I was told I have a 28% lifetime risk and my doctors haven’t been too worried? Maybe I should be more? The average woman has a 13% lifetime risk, so I was thinking this is just about double? I am 41 and for right now I am just getting a mammogram and ultrasound once a year. There was some talk of adding in a breast MRI, so I would have the mammogram/ultrasound and then the MRI 6 months later. And then have another visit where the dr just does an exam at my regular checkup. Maybe I should look into it more.

I’m not sure that this is exactly the right board, but I’m hoping maybe someone has an idea. We are living in Poland until summer 2025, when we will go back to the states. My oldest son will graduate from international school here in 2024. He has a summer birthday, so he is on the young end. He is starting to lean toward the idea of a gap year. However, he doesn’t speak Polish so I have no idea what he would do for that year. I’m trying to think of something he could do here while he is living with us. Some kids take classes at the university here, which I think is good. I’m thinking it is better to start as a freshman in the US rather than a transfer student, but maybe I should research that more. I don’t really want him just hanging out for a year (he will work out and play baseball with his polish team). But I also understand that at just turned 18 he may not be ready to be that far away. I’m regretting not saying he was a sophomore when we moved here. That would have been ideal.

This! Our house is very clean- the cleaner came yesterday and I did the dishes and laundry and trash. However, this thread is giving me stress- I don’t actually remember the last time I changed our sheets 😬 and I’m pretty sure there is some inedible food in the back of the fridge. I know what I am doing tonight 😀