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lovinmyboys

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Everything posted by lovinmyboys

  1. But maybe I’m wrong? I’m currently hiding in the bedroom at my parents house trying not to cry. We moved to Poland in the summer of 2022. My parents have never visited or said anything about visiting. When we told them my mom said she probably wouldn’t come because she doesn’t like to fly (we lived in the US before but not in the same state). We will be in Poland probably just until June 2025. Anyway, this morning over breakfast my dad said “did your mom tell you we are going to Europe the summer?” I was like no? Then he told us they are going on a group tour of biblical sites in Greece and Italy. Which, those places are not near Poland but I guess I thought they would at least include us in any plans in Europe. We haven’t been to Italy yet and maybe could have joined them. But I also am aware people are allowed to vacation on the same continent as us and not visit. It is just so weird to me. We have come back for both Christmases so maybe they feel like they have seen us enough. I know my kids would like to show them their lives there. And they have said stuff because I have other family members/inlaws who have made plans to come or have come.
  2. How close are they in age? I have four close in age boys and often got the younger ones more of the blocks we had so they could all build together. So even if we already had magnatiles or unit blocks, or duplos, I would get more. Or I would go the art supply route- stickers, play dough, etc.
  3. My kids all loved the Melissa and Doug food, but my youngest is 11 now so I don’t know if there is something better out there now. It has been at least a decade since I bought it.
  4. I love to sleep too! But I feel like it isn’t something I should admit? When people say “if you had a whole day to yourself what would you do” I always would include a nap. Napping is my favorite thing. I don’t care as much about nighttime sleep, but I try really hard to get to nap 4-5 times a week. I love all kinds of naps- from 15 minute couch naps to 2 hour naps in a dark room.
  5. We have 100s- 10 bookshelves full. But, it is starting to seem a little much because we really do play the same games mostly.
  6. I don’t remember my word but it was something like “experience.” I think I did a great job with that this year…next year maybe I need responsible. My oldest is a senior this year so we did lots of traveling this year before he goes to college. I started playing tennis and doing yoga. I hosted a weekly game day and I organized a monthly book club. I tried new foods and made new friends. I’m struggling to imagine what 2024 will look like. My oldest is planning to move away to college and I think that is what he should do…I just don’t know how I will feel about it. It will be a transition for sure. And I will definitely not be able to spend as much money experiencing life as we will be paying for his college. I’m determined to let him go more smoothly than my mom did for me. I’m feeling ok about it, I’m just not sure how the transition will go.
  7. I need to add more to my rotation. Right now our favorites are the peanut butter blossoms with the Hershey kiss in the center and spritz cookies. I’m wanting to do a 12 days of Christmas cookies but I need to get a few more ideas.
  8. I think going from 0-1 was most life changing, but adding the third was the hardest for me. Dh was deployed (well when he was 2 weeks old) and he was just my most challenging until he was around 7. Thankfully he is super easy to raise now, but those first years were rough! So much depends on other circumstances. Having my fourth was super easy, but I stopped there.
  9. Same! And we are living in Europe and I can’t get them. It is probably what I miss the most from America. One of my goals here is to master a pie crust. I have tried twice so far.
  10. My 11yr old just had a Halloween party. We played a dice game like Left Right Center with Halloween candy. I found it online- basically if you roll a 2 put a candy in the bowl, if a 3 pass a candy to the right, etc. We also played catch phrase with Halloween words and a random timer on my phone. We did throwing candy corn to a partner who catches it in a Halloween cup, throwing ping pong balls into Halloween buckets, tossing swimming rings onto pumpkins with stems, and using vampire teeth to transfer marshmallows from one plate to another. We ended with Mafia.
  11. This month I have read: The House on the Cerulean Sea The Word is Murder Garden Spells Of Boys and Men: Why the Modern Male is Struggling, why it matters and what to do about it Never Enough: When Achievement Culture Becomes Toxic Ans now I am reading: Just Another Missing Person
  12. I met some friends for winter tea and shopping at the farmers market. It was a beautiful fall morning here. In just a few weeks the sun will disappear for a few months, so it was nice to enjoy it while I could. Plus, winter tea is my favorite drink and I found good potatoes for baking. Usually the potatoes here are very small, so that was a fun surprise. Dh is traveling and I have quite a lot going on the next two weeks, so I really enjoyed the relaxing, peaceful morning.
  13. I think in my son’s mind he is friends with this girl- not besties but they spend time together. This particular son also tends to think everyone is his friend. Whereas I have definite lines between close friends and acquaintances, he just considers everyone he knows to be his friend. And I don’t know that anyone was really laughing on the bus- I mean the joke isn’t funny. But my kids both said that she would laugh..so again in my son’s mind she thought it was funny. As an adult, I know lots of reasons she would laugh even if it weren’t funny, but I don’t think he considered those. And of course he isn’t going to keep teasing this girl. I do think this was super obnoxious of him so I am glad the mom told me. I guess what I am asking is how to help him to know when he is being obnoxious. Because in his head she was laughing and joking back so he thought it was all fine. He was adamant he would have stopped if she didn’t laugh or told him to knock it off. And my older son who has much better social skills, said he didn’t realize it bothered her either (which does kind of make me worry). I mean my older son thought it was annoying, but he didn’t think she was getting her feelings hurt by it.
  14. My 9th grade son (who is a little immature and has adhd but in general has always been nice/easy to raise) has been telling a girl on the bus that he doesn’t want to sit by her- but then he does because that is his assigned seat. So he will get on the bus and say “oh (girls name) I don’t want to have to sit by you again” in what he feels is a jokey manner. He tells me this is how all his friends talk and they all know it is teasing/joking. He said the girl will then laugh and say “well I don’t want to sit by you either.” So I just found out about this today when the girls mom texted and said my son has been hurting her feelings and embarrassing her all year. Im not exactly sure how to handle it with the mom or with my son. My son asked how he was supposed to know he was upsetting the girl if she never told him and was laughing. My older son (who I feel is a pretty reliable narrator) said he thought what ds14 was doing was fine and the girl teases him back. So what should I say to my son and to the mom? And also I feel like my ds13 is sometimes on the mean side of jokey with his friends- but he also says that is just how they talk. I don’t really like it so I need I guess wisdom in how to handle it. Because I actually don’t think saying mean things even as a joke is funny, but all 3 of my teenage boys say that is how they talk with friends and everyone does it.
  15. My kids are all in school now and I’m not working so I kind of read when I want. I do think it is hard to read during the day because it feels very indulgent, but I got over that. I have more time during the day than the evening, so I just decided to embrace that time. I often am the only parent at home in the evenings so I am busy with the kids- who now stay up late enough that I go to bed at the same time as them. I enjoy reading more when I can really sink into a book, so I tend to block off a couple of mornings a week to read for a few hours then the other days I do the errands and household tasks. In general I get the kids to school, eat breakfast and read the internet, tidy up, exercise, get ready for the day, then I read for a few hours. If I try to read after lunch I get sleepy, so I use my afternoons to be more productive (although it is debatable whether those tasks are actually more productive than reading).
  16. Pretty much everything- my oldest will start college next year with 3 others following in the next 5 years. We are currently living overseas so when we move back to the US we will need to buy a house and cars, plus we will probably have teen boys needing car insurance. I just don’t even want to think about it all. We did take a few great vacations this past year, so we can live on those memories I guess.
  17. It is already starting to get dark early so I think it is a great time to add more lights.
  18. One of my boys always knows what is in style and I never really knew how because he isn’t spending his time looking at clothing websites or reading about fashion or anything. I finally realized that he really notices what other people are wearing. Wherever he is he pays attention to how people are dressed. I have started doing that and I feel more comfortable knowing what is in style now. So if I am running errands I just purposefully notice what I see others wearing. I also look at Maurice’s website and if I find something I like it will often suggest several ways to wear it.
  19. I’m sorry for venting. I am just so tired. Dh has been traveling or working very late most of this school year and I just feel so done. It has been a really hard 5 weeks. I like to think of myself as a strong, independent, capable woman, but it all just feels really hard right now. It feels like a fair division of labor that dh works and I do everything else, but supporting the emotional lives of teenagers is just really wearing me down. Even though I am not working and I have no more small children, I still feel like I have so many balls to juggle. When everything is “normal” it is fine, but there has just been so much these last few weeks. When dh is home, I do often have to remind him that we don’t do things “that” way and if he would like to change them he is welcome to be in charge of that thing. And that can be more stressful than the solo parenting. But, when he is home for a longer stretch, we do get into a rhythm. And he is always helpful with keeping up on tidying and chauffeuring etc. I have done a lot of solo parenting the last 17 years. Instead of feeling like I am a pro at it, I just mostly feel tired of doing it.
  20. My son has been getting warts on his face pretty frequently. I have been taking him to the dermatologist and she removes them. They pop up all over his face so it isn’t like they are growing back in the same spot. Is there anything else I should be doing to help prevent them? He does have a dermatologist appointment to remove two this week and I will ask her again. They have been getting removed very quickly after they appear, which I thought was supposed to help, but it seems like he is just getting them more frequently. I know warts are pretty common in kids, but it is one thing if they are on their knees or something. I can’t just leave them on his face.
  21. I was wondering about allergies because he also has those scratches on his neck and he said he thinks he scratched himself in his sleep because it was itching. Mine and my moms rosacea always looked worse than that and had bumps, but maybe I had just redness before and didn’t notice.
  22. I really miss reading to babies! My kids always really liked rhyming books and wordless books. Tuesday by David Weisner and Goodnight Gorilla for very few words. Cows in the Kitchen and I Ain’t Gonna Paint No More for rhyming.
  23. My teen son has started having red cheeks. I think it looks fine, but he is convinced he has rosacea. My mom had it probably in her forties and I had it for a few years. Should I take him to the dermatologist? Is there anything they can do if it is caught early? He was just at the dermatologist in May, but I think this is a new development. Wouldn’t rosacea be pretty rare in teens?
  24. I naively let the whole family visit the day my oldest was born. I started feeling unwell and I don’t think my husband got the hint and it wasn’t fun. This was 17 years ago and we were quite young. With my subsequent kids it was just the grandparents (and honestly I would have liked for it to be just the grandmothers). And with my last we lived far away and it was just us, which was a little boring and sad or have no one to show him off to. Although I had relatively easy births, I still was not really up for visitors in the 24-48 hours after giving birth. I know everyone wants to see the new baby and I am sure I will want to be there when my grandbabies are born, but I think it is nice that the women who just went through childbirth are feeling ok to say no.
  25. Yes. I used to throw everything away by its expiration date, but now that I am overseas I have eaten my fair share of American food that has expired and I don’t know why I haven’t been doing this the whole time.
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