So true! We've had our rock paths longer, but they are seriously maintained. When they get really full of debris and dirt, we actually shop vac the bad parts. There's no cleaning them (not to say we haven't tried!). We had the landscapers out last fall to redo everything - basically they refreshed the weed barrier, and added a lot more rocks. We paid for half a ton, but he said it was about a full ton because he had extra. I honestly wouldn't opt for rocks again unless we move back the desert, where xeriscaping makes sense. But for us, now that we have them we'll maintain them to avoid the backbreaking work of removing them.

I could have written this! DS (10) is on the same schedule. He's in bed by 8 - 8:30, but gets up at 5:30 - 6:00 for alone time. If he stays up late, he still gets up - but he's crabby. And the rest of your post ... Yep, right there with you. I'd like to try having DS stay up later consistently, and see if his schedule shifts to sleeping in a bit. But the worry is that I won't get that alone time, which sounds selfish. FWIW, DS (mine) is not a play alone type personality. He doesn't have to play *with* someone, but he's building or creating or doing something alongside me, wherever I may be. Not alone in his room. So there is a constant chatter whether he's talking to himself or asking me to see something. It's a personality thing, and I can enjoy it most of the day. But by night time - I am wiped out. So we have to find a balance.

I think it's a nice tradition, and the board wouldn't look the same without it. The days I've tried it, it's been a big help. I'm not always in list mode, but when there's a big to-do, it helps!

If you'd ever like to share more about your experience upon finding birthrelatives, I'd love to hear about it. DH has recently (in his 40s) found birthrelatives. It's been quite a journey. His birthparents are married now, with other children who don't know about DH! One BP is open to meeting, the other has been reluctant. They have been in email contact for several years, but DH is ready for this to either go somewhere (meeting? a phone call? something beyond a sort of superficial sending of holiday cards and occasional emails) or end. He has never had issues with knowing that he has a birthfamily out there until now - feeling like he's been strung along for years with constant suggestions of an upcoming visit that never materializes. It's a strange experience, to say the least. I think knowing that he has quite a few siblings out there who don't know that he exists is odd, too.

We've adopted twice. Both wide open adoptions. :) For both, we were in the delivery room and roomed in with baby at the hospital till time to go home. Our two experiences have been vastly different, and I'd say that they are on opposite ends of the spectrum. One was a domestic private adoption, the other was through foster-care, but very open (birthparents requested baby to be placed with us as a stipulation of signing over to foster care). One embodies every dream of open adoption and more. It has been a fabulous, amazing experience and birthparents and their extended families have become our family. It is beautiful. Painful sometimes, difficult, but with communication - it all works. We visit often, birthfamily stays in our home for extended visits, and we are like any extended family, we have even vacationed together. We were in birthmother's wedding a few years ago. :) I would compare it to the work that goes into any committed relationship, like a marriage really. Not all adoptions are as open as ours, but we truly love our DS's birthfamily, and that makes it easier. We have truly learned a lot about love through this process. We walked into our second adoption with our main concern being that we wanted the same level of openness for our next child, because we worried that another child would feel left out if their adoption were not as open. We communicated that clearly, we did everything in our power to create openness, and felt that it was going well. But at 8 weeks, the birthmother simply could not handle it. She was young (very young), and without the support of her family - who knew us, but despite our efforts and sharing, did not really grasp the concept of openness in adoption, and maybe were simply eager for birthmother to "forget" and go back to her life - it just didn't work well and birthmom chose not to have visits for several years. With some patience from us, and some gentle invitations, she has visited several times recently, but I fear we'll never have the openness we'd hoped. There has been outright hostility and inappropriate behavior from the birthfather's family - some of it has been frightening, some of it has created stress and fear and a sense of betrayal for us. We have grieved the loss of openness deeply, and hope that things will smooth out in the future, as birthparents gain some maturity. That adoption went through foster care, though we were present at the birth and brought baby home from the hospital - so it was a different type of foster-care adoption, and we truly hoped for another open experience. Which we technically have - just not on the level we'd hoped. Based on those two experiences, I can answer questions about 2 different open adoptions - both are an on-going process, but we are in radically different places in each.

If your DH thinks it's hard to get leaves and tree stuff out of mulch, just wait till he tries to get it out of rocks! We have areas of both, and I would never put down rocks under trees. Never. It is such a hassle to maintain, and if the rocks end up with bits of leaves and other debris, they look terrible. Maybe it depends on the type of rock? I would do mulch under trees, and plan on remulching periodically to keep it looking nice. Oh, and the other issue with rocks - you must, absolutely must, put down a weed barrier. The weed barrier will break down over time. Trust me. :) Not only will it break down, it will end up with holes in it. Or better yet, the bits of debris and leaves will work their way under the rocks and then break down and become soil for weeds! On top of the barrier. Fun, fun. There's nothing quite like rocks with weeds. And the rocks really do help those weeds grow - they hold the moisture in the soil and create a great environment. All that said, I love our areas that we've done with rock. They are confined, and in easy to maintain areas - and the paths look nice. But I was out with the kids just yesterday cleaning them up. Oh, and we did have half a ton of rocks delivered and spread last fall, so we sort of have a head start this year (and that was just to "freshen up" the areas, according to the landscaper! As maintenance.)

I just remembered greenguard.org. You might be able to search there for cabinets that are low off gassing. We are researching to redo our kitchen, and the adhesives used are often bad, too. Hopefully there are options out there!

I don't have an answer for you, but am bumping. DS reacts to off gassing, too. We've found some good info through the Allergic Living magazine - they have a section of their website devoted to this issue. Also, our doc gave us the name of another website ... I don't have it on hand but will try to come back and post. A doctor in TX has done a lot of work in this area, and it's affiliated with him. One thing that does help is an air filter with a carbon filter, for the VOCs.

I'm so deeply sorry, too.

Thanks! We always have trouble finding one that's free of X contamination issues!

Such a bummer, but how cool that the military takes it into consideration now! Love the A/C perk. My mom was a military wife and it wasn't considered, way back in the dark ages. She suffered through, but ate nothing - and I mean nothing - raw until I was an adult. Her seasonal allergies were horrendous, too. Still are. You sound like you have a lot in common. It may have been menopause that changed things for her. I'm not sure. I talked to her just a while ago, and she said it didn't change till she was 52 - when she tried raw pineapple on a beach in Bali. Guess she figured if she was going to go, at least it would be in paradise. :) She slowly introduced more raw foods, and now she can [gasp] eat a salad. I hope it improves for you. Maybe it will be a good benefit of menopause someday! I'm hoping it changes for DS, too. He can't eat anything raw except some apples and occasionally grapes. Bananas send us to the ER. He's allergic to a ton of other foods, too. And trees and grass and holy cow... It goes on and on!

I'm sorry, too. DS was allergic to coconut, but recently outgrew it. If you have an allergist, you might have him/her keep an eye on the RAST numbers to see if they go down. We were shocked and delighted that he outgrew an allergy! DS is now allergic to only half the known universe minus one. :) My mom outgrew a lot of good allergies in her 40s, so it's possible. Just wanted to insert some hope.

I'm with you. Those all drive me crazy, too. And the people who say that DS should just have a little bit of [insert allergen] so he'll learn to tolerate it. Or the ones who say he'll get "stronger" as he gets older - as if he's weak for having allergies!

End of June does feel like a long way off, but please do consider keeping that appt, just so you have it on the books. In the meantime, it won't hurt to find another GP! I hope you find the answer, and that it's a benign one. As someone who's been known to pass out in the night several times when getting up for the bathroom or drinks (aack!), make sure your DH knows when you're up and about at night, just in case you fall and need help. I *never* tell DH, as I don't want to wake him, and too often he's heard the crash and had to come to my rescue - out of a sound sleep! Better to wake him and give him warning, LOL.

If the waits are too long for the internal med docs, keep those appts but in the meantime try another GP. That person might get you started on some new testing, etc, and may even be able to call the internal med docs, or neurologists (or whoever they feel you need) and help you get an earlier appt. FWIW, you absolutely need to have this checked, so keep on top of getting appts - even if you have to wait for them. I would think you'd need a neuro, personally, but internal med sounds like a good place to start, and they can advise you better than we can here.

So glad you are ok!!!

Not offensive. :) I'm hard to offend anyway. Don't worry if you've done it. It just shocked me that the two must go hand in hand. And I get asked it every time we're out. So it gets old. It's not offensive usually, but it depends where the conversation goes after that. If the conversation suddenly stops, parent turns away from us & calls kids away... Which does happen ... That isn't nice. It's hurtful to DS, and makes me sad. We once had a kid at the playground tell DS he's going to hell. DS handled it well. Another time, a mom and I had made plans to meet up again at the pool for a first time play date. After that, the church question came up, it wandered into "my pastor called us to homeschool" and then somehow to my (orthodox) Jewish family... And they never showed up for our play date, nor did they respond to emails. That was the worst, because it hurt DS's feelings. Mostly though, I just countdown till the question is asked when we meet people.

"I could never do that." - Yes, that's probably true. Don't try, really. It's not for everyone. :) And the one I get every. single. time. it's mentioned that we homeschool: "Where do you go to church?" Really? Homeschooling = church? Apparently in our area it does. We don't attend a church, and the moment that I mention that there is a stunned silence as people process the fact that we don't homeschool for religious reasons. I never could have imagined that this would be our most common question.

For our family: we follow USDA guidelines. Over the top, maybe. But no more risk taking here. My immune system is compromised. I've had horrendous bouts with food poisoning. And I've experienced chronic salmonella. 5 strains! Ick. Very hard to beat. Much more than just stomach upset! Oh, and a tapeworm, from pork. Ummm, never again. To be fair, we are fairly certain these things didn't happen from eating at home, but still ... I am super careful, and I love our meat thermometer. I don't want to waste food, but getting seriously ill isn't an option either. No savings, certainly. We have to find a balance, but if I think it's turned... It goes.

Thanks so much, everyone. I am on a phone, so will respond more later, but wanted to send a big thank you for sharing right now. It helps. :)

Have you been in this position or were you coached how to handle it? Trying to create/maintain openness in the adoption despite being treated like villains by the birthfamily? Obviously, foster-adopt so there's some back story here, and kids are not with birthfamily for a reason. Still, we are firm in our belief that openness in adoption is usually a good thing. This has played out well with one child, but with the other - it's a struggle. There's a lot of hostility coming at us. :( It can't be good for the kids to see, and we've tried to shield them from it. Just struggling today with how to find a healthy balance. It would help to hear stories/experiences, if anyone wants to share.

Ouch!!!! Did he put acid on the wart after burning it , too?? Ooooh, when I had that done .... Yowsers!! Put your feet up tomorrow.

Are you sure it was 100% leather? If you go leather again, pay attention to that, and avoid bonded leather (the equivalent of particle board in the leather world). Leather shouldn't peel. Ikea, Costco, Rooms 2 Go... Good luck!

Famous Dave's has a gluten free menu, too. (Did I mention that already?) They have a decent allergy menu, so you can easily see which items are dairy free, too. We are gluten, dairy, peanut, tree nut, sesame, and raw food allergic and Famous Dave's has been pretty accommodating - none of us have had any reactions afterward.

What do they do with the stuff? Mom in High Heels, is it standard for them to sort it into donations, recyclables, landfill, or did you have to request it? I've been pondering this, too, as we have some, errrr, stuff in our garage that needs to go!