Yep, this is exactly what is being offered: Lots of RSUs, average base pay, hefty sign on/retention bonus paid out over 2 years. There's also talk of an extra bonus for maintaining Top Secret security clearance, but doing some digging on reddit and blind, that "bonus" may just be in the form of more RSUs that need time to vest and not actual cash in the paycheck. Neat trick.

Yes! I have lived in a lot of places that were not "home". They were fun, and it was an adventure, but I never lost the feeling I was not "home". I always felt a little like I was borrowing someone else's life. And yes, the weather felt wrong and the sun came in at an odd angle. Everything felt off.

Thank you, everyone, for your replies. We would not be able to rent out our current home because we bought it with a VA loan. The terms of the loan state the home must be used as our primary residence. I would have to refinance to be able to rent it out and my current mortgage rate is very low. We'd have to refinance to a higher rate to rent it, which seems like madness. The company is Amazon and yes, one of the locations they offered us was Seattle. We were also offered a position near Arlington, VA. Arlington is a great place, but Amazon has stipulations on how far away we would be allowed to live from Arlington or Seattle, which still means expensive housing in either location. The position is for a government contract that requires a high level security clearance. If something goes wrong at 2 am, you have to be able to get to the office very quickly. There is no remote work option for that position at all because of security issues, and all work is to be done in Amazon's secure facility. All of that just adds to the stress of working for an already high-stress company. The process for the security clearance takes 18 months to complete, so DH would be working on commercial projects until the clearance comes through. The friends I know who have been through the clearance process all describe it as "invasive". Great! A demanding employer in a HCOL area AND the federal government picking through the last 10 years of our lives, plus interviewing our friends, relatives, and ex-spouses. Sounds terrific! 😕 The whole situation just feels like a LOT. How do people afford these houses? Who are these people that are moving into $750,000 houses like it's no big deal?

I have lived in both Chicago and Buffalo during the winter. A combination of things helped to stay warm: heat shrink plastic over the windows, weather stripping around the doors and the little foam inserts that go behind outlet plates. I also made draft-stoppers for the bottom of the door, (old socks filled with rice). Dressing in layers helps: turtleneck with a shirt over it. Long johns for when it was really cold! Socks and warm slippers. Don't sit with wet hair! And do NOT go out with wet hair! It's a long, dull story, but I got hypothermia once partly because of damp hair and working up a sweat shoveling snow. Don't do that! Put on warm, clean, dry socks and jammies before bed. Also, a down comforter and flannel sheets really help. You don't need bulky layers to stay warm. I found that a few thin layers plus one bulky layer worked well.

Chicken pox when I was 11. DS11 has been vaccinated against chicken pox. I am 47 and no shingles yet, knock wood. I will get the shingles vaccine when my doctor recommends it.

Husband has been vaguely unhappy with his current job for several months. Not unhappy enough to start an aggressive job search, but unhappy enough that he updated his resume on LinkedIn just to see what would happen. He was contacted by Big Tech Firm about a position that would require relocating 1,500 miles away. He has gone through the initial screening and a phone interview, and Big Tech Firm has invited him to interview in person next month. There's some exciting things about the position and some less than exciting things. Husband and I have been doing a Good Cop/Bad Cop thing, where one day he's opposed to moving and I'm cheerleading him, then the next day I'm opposed to moving and he's pointing out all the good that could come from moving. In the plus column is a lot of financial incentive, plus DH would get to work for Big Tech Firm on some very interesting projects. In the negative column is that the job requires us to live in a place that neither of us really want to move to. DH and I have lived all over the country, from big cities to tiny towns. We've been everywhere from LA to NYC to Chicago to You-Can't-Find-It-On-A-Map, Tennessee and East-of-No-Where, Texas. I've done multiple cross-country moves in my life, always to places I've never even visited before. I am definitely not afraid of change or pulling up stakes and trying something new. But every time I think about putting my house on the market and moving 1500 miles away to a cold, rainy place in January, I burst into tears. I just don't want to go. I have no idea why I don't want to go other than I just don't. I like where I am living. I don't want to sell my house and give up my chickens. I like that when I go to the post office, they know my name. I run into people I know in town all the time. I know the manager at the grocery store, (his name is Juan and he's the nicest guy!) I have friends here. Kiddo seems content here. We like our dentist and doctors. Those seem like flimsy reasons to decline a lucrative job. The only reason I have is "I'm happy where I am". But I could possibly be happy somewhere else? The place where Big Tech Firm is located is a desirable area. Lots of people love living there. Maybe if I go, I'd learn to love it, too? How do you make this kind of choice? My gut is telling me "Don't go. Don't move", but on paper, this looks like a great opportunity. DH is ambivalent about the location. He says the job sounds great, but the location is not-great. Help? Advice?

I don't think it's too harsh. Moody and snotty behavior may be age appropriate, but that doesn't mean it's acceptable behavior. I'm assuming that you've tried talking with her about her attitude and actions, and it's falling on deaf ears. If so, then yes, time to underline the concept that if you act in rude and unhelpful ways, other people are not going to go out of their way to help you. I probably would have pulled the plug on basketball practice, however, rather than co-op.

I believe you because my kiddo rolled his eyes at me when he was about 18 months old. I was happily chatting at kiddo about I-dont-know-what. Then he sighed, rolled his eyes, and walked away. I looked at husband and said "Did that baby just roll his eyes at me?!" This is the same kiddo that told me I had "bad form" when I (deliberately) missed the putt when playing golf with him with his little toddler set. Geez.

And as for Aunt Maude's "right" to photos: Aunt Maude can do whatever she wants with photos of herself, but other people are not props in Aunt Maude's production of "Family Wedding 2019". She's not entitled to photograph, (and post on social media; because that's where these photos are headed, and not to an album to sit on an end table), everyone around her.

I kind of understand the "No phones, no pics during the wedding!" rule. My sibling is one of those people that takes a zillion pics at other people's events and then immediately posts them on line. She is forever stealing someone else's thunder because she wants to be the first to "congratulate the new couple!" and splash their photos all over facebook. Same for new baby pics, engagement announcements, etc. Not everyone wants to live their life on social media. Some people are very careful and selective in what they want posted on social media because of security reasons (crazy ex, crazy relatives, etc). They also may have jobs that require a low profile. Twenty-five years ago, no one would have been the wiser if you acted a fool at your cousin's wedding, but thanks to social media *everyone* will know immediately. I don't need my co-workers seeing me shoveling in wedding cake and doing the chicken dance.

Dress Barn is definitely closing. My husband works with their parent company. They are not rebranding Dress Barn. The plan is to keep it going through the holiday buying season to generate as much profit as possible. There may be a few stores that linger into Q1 of next year, but those are exceptions rather than the rule. Edited to add: The exact schedule of closing is subject to change, of course. Husband isn't part of the decision-making process for when closures happen.

I would tell them what you plan to make and if they say "Oh, we can't/won't/don't eat that", I'd say "Oh, what a shame you'll miss out. You should go ahead and bring Thing You Can/Will Eat, because I will only be making Thing You Won't Eat and won't be able to make a 2nd dinner for you". All of this is assuming their dietary issues are preferences and not for medical reasons.

It was really unfair and wrong of the competition to switch prizes like that. No kid wants raisins/sultanas as a prize, and I'd bet a lot of adults don't want raisins/sultanas as a prize, either. The prize is so ridiculous that it's comical, (except it happened to your kid, which makes it not-funny at all). I wouldn't blame your child for never wanting to participate in that contest again, and I'd be pretty steamed about the whole situation. Adults can be such jerks to kids. We had our own disappointment with the county fair today. Long story short: we were promised ABC, we did not receive ABC, and the tour guide just shrugged, said "Oh well", and walked off. The last couple of field trips we've done have been completely half-a$$ed and the guides terrible. My son doesn't want to bother with them anymore.

And we should acknowledge it. Some diseases can't be cured or even treated to a degree to improve the patient's quality of life. It sucks, and it's unfair, but it's true. Sometimes things are broken and they can't be fixed. My stepmother died of pancreatic cancer and declined all treatment beyond palliative care. She asked her doctor "If someone you loved had this type of cancer, would you recommend chemo?" and he said no. He told her that the treatment would get her more time on earth, but it would likely be time spent sick from chemo, in hospitals, and generally suffering. So she declined the treatment and died 6 weeks later. Those were 6 *good enough* weeks on earth. If she'd done chemo, she would have gotten maybe 6 months of misery. I am all for informed choice in medical care. Coffee enemas have ZERO proof of curing anything or improving anything. They do NOT work. If they worked, doctors would USE THEM.

It has the potential for a lot of uses, but no one on my Facebook feed is talking about it's ability to help with pancreatic cancer or Parkinson's. It's all "It will help you sleep! Cures autoimmune diseases! It fixes your allergies! Cures anxiety in dogs! Great for weight loss! It's a 'drug free' treatment for ADHD! Don't suffer from the heartbreak of psoriasis! Use CBD oil!" None of these people are using a product that has any kind of quality control or studies to back up their claims. It's yet another MLM company preying on the bored and desperate.

Been there, done that. I have been asked twice in the last 3 months to attend far away trips with the extended family. Both times I've said "I'm sorry; I wish I could come, but school/work/childcare/pet care/money/etc. I simply can't make it". Both times, the retirees were frustrated and annoyed. My sister flat out told my uncle "Look, we can't go. I just started a new job, my child starts 1st grade that week, and I haven't finished unpacking from moving house. If you'd planned this a month earlier or later, maybe I could have made it happen, but the timing of this simply doesn't work for me to attend". My uncle's response? "Well, I didn't plan this with your schedule in mind! You aren't the focus of the trip!" Yes, this is clearly evident and entirely the problem, uncle. If you want people to attend your event in a far away land, then you have to take their schedule into consideration! My dad is no better. He's been on a kick lately where he suggests last-minute flights to vacation somewhere. I'd love to travel more, but I need more than 3 weeks notice to pull together passports, pet care, and money if you want to go to Ireland with me, Dad!

I actually know 2 people that died because they decided to use "natural cures" for autoimmune hepatitis and cancer. In one case, the person stopped their meds, used juice cleanses and essential oils. They went into liver failure rapidly and died. The other person took about 18 months before they died of cancer. They did not pursue chemo, surgery, or radiation, but instead chose essential oils, veganism, organic foods, and coffee enemas. These were both young people in their 30s. The first person had only been married 18 months. The second person left 2 young kids behind to grow up without their mother.

Essential oils are last year. CBD oil is the new snake oil in town.

That looks so cool. It's so crazy that only a few years ago things like this were impossible! Now you can DIY an EKG at home. Amazing!

Paternal grandparents: 1916 and 1921. These grandparents lived until age 87 and 85, respectively. Non-smokers and non-drinkers who died simply because their hearts gave out from old age. Maternal grandparents: 1926 and 1927. These grandparents lived to age 80 and 81, respectively. Both were smokers and social drinkers. They died of non-respiratory cancers, but I have to wonder if they would have lived longer if they had not smoked.

My keys and sunglasses always go in the same spot, or else I will never find them. I always fold the laundry as it comes out of the dryer and put it away immediately. I had a cat that would pee on clean laundry (ugh!), and he trained me to get this task done right away! I no longer have the cat, but I still do it because it is One Less Thing to pile up.

Meditation and Brene Brown.

Because at 22, these "kids" aren't children. They are adults. They are new adults, but they are adults. I don't know about you, but I do not appreciate a lecture and scolding from my father when he thinks I've strayed from his value system. I feel like much of the conflict I see on this board between adult children and their parents is because the parents are struggling with letting go. Their children are off making their own decisions, but the parents see themselves as still "In Charge". Don't try to parent your adult offspring. Your kids are likely to make decisions that you disagree with. If you keep reacting to those decisions like your children are deliberately trying to provoke you or it's evidence of a moral failing, you're probably not going to have a great relationship with each other. I'm 47. My parents *still* view differences of opinion as character flaws or like I'm throwing a tantrum. I don't recommend this type of dynamic to anyone.

For what it's worth, I never would have guessed this about you. You've always come across as very calm, collected, and reasonable! I am also a venter that is trying to put a lid on it. My parents were people that would spew angry words and assault your character when angry. I can still hear my stepmother screaming at me that I was a "Selfish, selfish, self-absorbed thing!" because I forgot to pick up a gallon of milk on my way home from work. And I worked in a grocery store! And I too was 22! Ugh.

Stop telling him what to do. Maybe he doesn't want that kind of relationship with you anymore. Even if you think he needs that kind of guidance, even if you think he's making a giant mess of his life, even if you think it's foolish to spend $20 on hamburgers, just stop. He's 22. It's rude and snotty the way that he handled this trip and everything around it; there's no disagreement from me that he handled it poorly. It seems like you have a lot of expectations for how your son should fit into your lives and his siblings lives. Did you ask him if it was ok to add on the other sibling? Did your son want to handle all the arrangements for the trip, but instead you took over as "Mom and Dad" and managed/parented the whole thing? Did you maybe step on his toes and he got mad and said "Forget it. I'll take the trip by myself". I feel like I've been the son in this situation. I offer to do ABC, parents agree and then hijack the plan, adding on more responsibility for me plus *all* their expectations for how I should be living my life, and then give me an ultimatum that they'll pull the plug on the whole thing if I don't behave. If this was a friend and not your son, would you have used the same words and tone? Would you have handled it the same way, or would you have extended more grace and courtesy?