How do you talk with a pediatrician about a child's behavior?

[KarenNC]

I frequently see the advice to talk with your child's pediatrician if you have concerns about something, but I'm not sure how to go about doing that. I have some things I would like to discuss with a pediatrician about my child's behavior as an initial step, but I would really prefer to talk with the doctor privately rather than with her with me. She's not old enough to really be unsupervised at the visit nor do I have someone available who could go with me to sit outside with her. I've never tried to make an appointment to see the pediatrician alone. We also go to a large practice, and that infrequently in recent years, so there's not a particular doctor with whom I feel a special connection or that I feel knows her particularly well.

 

Has anyone done this before? Did you feel the pediatrician was helpful, or were you just referred on to someone else?

[SonshineLearner]

It would depend on what behaviour. If it's something you think is linked to a LD, then maybe. But, I really never thought that my DR would know more than me, since his kids were little bitty.

Carrie;-)

[klmama]

Could you call and ask for a phone consultation instead of a face-to-face meeting? If it's a developmental or behavioral concern, the ped. will probably want to see her in person before referring to someone else, but he/she might be willing to discuss it all with you over the phone first to avoid causing problems for your dd's self-image. It can't hurt to ask!

[Wendi]

It's possible that one of the doctors in the group is more willing/experienced to deal with behavioral concerns. It's also possible that they don't really get into behavioral problems, and the office staff will refer you somewhere else. (That's what happened to us; ds's pediatrician's office referred us to a developmental pediatrician.)

 

I hope you get some answers!

 

Wendi

[ummtafari]

Did you feel the pediatrician was helpful, or were you just referred on to someone else?

 

 

In my experience, we have always been referred to a specialist for behavioral issues.

[rafiki]

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[Pamela H in Texas]

I agree it depends. Could you just go to a diagnostician or other specialist yourself? Our insurance doesn't make us go through our doctor so we just set up whatever we feel we need. My friend's insurance does the same. She just had her son tested through a diagnostician. Kid is about to turn 6 and it took like 8 visits to do full psychological and educational testing on him. I think that is much more responsible than most doctors we've seen anyway.

 

ETA: If you share some specific concerns, we may be able to suggest a couple specialists to contact or ask your pediatrician about.

[Tap]

I guess it depends on what you are wanting to discuss.

 

Our adopted dd2 has some issues due to her moms drug use. I contacted ESD who tested her for us. They tested her learning and discussed her behavior issues. ESD said they couldn't help because she wasn't learning delayed by that we could seek private therapy. They gave me a list of resources in the area and from that list I found two incredible therapists.

 

One therapist is a behavioral therapist, and the other is a Sensory OT. The only thing that went through my pediatrician was when I needed a referral to get the insurance authorization to pay for the appointments.

 

I like having the behavior therapist, because we have a weekly appointment to discuss the issues I want addressed and that I can go to with dd2 or I can go alone. I can take my other kids and she will help them deal better with dd2 and answer their questions about what is going on. My pediatrician couldn't have done any of this. They can just medicate. The behavior therapist has helped me understand dd2 so much more than I could have Ever imagined. I parent her so different, and she is a different child now 3 months later. She used to be a terror! Now she is just a difficult toddler. I don't cringe now, when she wakes up in the morning :0)

 

 

Our sensory therapist is similar but she is more about actions with dd, then discussing issues. But that is the difference between why I hired them, not a complaint. We talk to the sensory OT, as she does therapy but it is about her therapy goals instead of her life or behaviors (again the difference is the type of therapist).

 

I would have never known about the different types of therapists or that dd2 had sensory issues with out the evaluation by ESD. I never knew that ESD did evaluation of kids this young, but they will do it so that the child can get assistance before they start school instead of waiting for problems in 1st grade.

[swellmomma]

I have appraoched it different ways. When they were small I talked the dr with them in the room. As they got bigger the dr would sometimes have the nurse take them to a separate room so I could let him know what was going on. We have done phone consults, as well when we go to the kids shrink they stay in the waiting room with 2 staff supervising while I talk to her. My ped has been working with me and my kids issues since they were wee, so we have managed to develop our own code to talk about the kids without them fully paying attention to us when it comes to behavioural issues.

[lulubelle]

i was able to get the doctors email from the receptionist and he was very prompt in his response.

[Sugarfoot]

Some Dr.'s here are available through email. You could write out your concerns and someone (nurse?) would at least call you in response. Maybe see if your practice has that option?

 

HTH,

[mama2girls]

Thank you for posting this, this was a question on my mind today!:001_smile:

[lynn]

My pediatrican and I had our oldest children around the same time so, we always chatteda bout different things. When ADD issues started to occur she was just there to help me make educated decisions on what direction to go in. She was also very supportive of homeschooling and always takes to to ask the boysa bout their activities and sports. Talking to her has always been easy and I never felt bad or ashamed of asking her advice or guidance on things.

[muffinmom]

Our pediatrician has always been very interested and willing to offer advice on behavioral issues. Sometimes I could discuss it with the nurse on the phone and get what I needed. But at least once, my dh and I made an appt. with the dr., after hours--apparently he sets aside time for this kind of thing after the regular day--and of course, our child was not with us. It was brief but private.

 

But I'm sure it depends on your dr. They may have a certain protocol for such issues.

[EKS]

I have made appointments to talk to the pediatrician alone. He was very helpful. Also, during appointments where my son was present I have handed the doctor notes and then he has had a nurse hang out with my son while we talked privately.

[KidsHappen]

I hace made appts. to talk to our dr. alone and I have talked to him on the phone before an appt. He is been my dr. for quite a long time and knows both me and my children well so I am comfortable talking to him about behavioral issues.