Scarlett Posted July 16, 2019 Share Posted July 16, 2019 To be fair, I've never watched an episode of either. All I know I know from the news, printed and tv. But am I the only one shocked about how how she/he gets over night' time with several of them? And why is everyone hating on this poor Luke who wanted to know if she was having sex with them before he decided if he wanted to go home or not? I just feel like I am in the twilight zone some days. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted July 16, 2019 Share Posted July 16, 2019 It seems like a "meat market" type of scenario. I assume that the backlash is that if you join a meat market, you shouldn't be complaining that it's a meat market? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted July 16, 2019 Author Share Posted July 16, 2019 Oh I just remembered I did watch a few of the first season....anyone remember that dark headed girl with an unusual name who he liked but she was kinda meh about the whole thing? I think she and I felt the same about the whole concept, which is why she went home and I never watched it again. It is just so icky. Pick me pick me! Ugh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted July 16, 2019 Share Posted July 16, 2019 Ugh - I avoid news on this drivel in any format. I'm pretty stunned anyone follows this garbage. And well Luke is an idiot for choosing to be on the show. Poor him nothing. If you're interested in a real adult relationship, not the best path. I suspect most these people are just titillated by their 15 minutes of fame and some money. 3 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted July 16, 2019 Author Share Posted July 16, 2019 1 hour ago, FuzzyCatz said: Ugh - I avoid news on this drivel in any format. I'm pretty stunned anyone follows this garbage. And well Luke is an idiot for choosing to be on the show. Poor him nothing. If you're interested in a real adult relationship, not the best path. I suspect most these people are just titillated by their 15 minutes of fame and some money. Yes that is true....why would he even BE on that show if his values are so different than what is apparently being sold on there....I wish I could avoid it.....but it is often headline news! 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted July 16, 2019 Share Posted July 16, 2019 I'm not watching - I think I saw one episode once many years ago and was grossed out. So this was my thought at the time - how could these women (then it was only the Bachelor) sleep with someone they know is sleeping with other women? There are so many many reasons not to do that! No offense but IMO anyone who would participate in that kind of show, on either side, is a sick or desperate person with no self-respect - and who the hell would want to marry (or be in a "serious" relationship with) either side of that equation? 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted July 16, 2019 Author Share Posted July 16, 2019 5 minutes ago, SKL said: I'm not watching - I think I saw one episode once many years ago and was grossed out. So this was my thought at the time - how could these women (then it was only the Bachelor) sleep with someone they know is sleeping with other women? There are so many many reasons not to do that! No offense but IMO anyone who would participate in that kind of show, on either side, is a sick or desperate person with no self-respect - and who the hell would want to marry (or be in a "serious" relationship with) either side of that equation? Exactly my thoughts after the one or two I watched years ago. I thought it was the first season, but I don't see that woman I am thinking of.....now it is driving me crazy. It really is a sick concept. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QueenCat Posted July 16, 2019 Share Posted July 16, 2019 2 hours ago, Scarlett said: To be fair, I've never watched an episode of either. All I know I know from the news, printed and tv. But am I the only one shocked about how how she/he gets over night' time with several of them? And why is everyone hating on this poor Luke who wanted to know if she was having sex with them before he decided if he wanted to go home or not? I just feel like I am in the twilight zone some days. I rarely watch it but did last night. The channel was already on & for some weird reason, I started watching. Was Luke's question reasonable? Yes. However, he asked his questions and shared his concerns in a very condescending, judgmental manner. He was an a** and demonstrated it in several ways. And I don't buy for a minute that he really has these particular views if he's on this particular show. 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted July 16, 2019 Author Share Posted July 16, 2019 27 minutes ago, QueenCat said: I rarely watch it but did last night. The channel was already on & for some weird reason, I started watching. Was Luke's question reasonable? Yes. However, he asked his questions and shared his concerns in a very condescending, judgmental manner. He was an a** and demonstrated it in several ways. And I don't buy for a minute that he really has these particular views if he's on this particular show. Apparently everyone thinks he is a jerk...and I only read his words....didn't watch it. Just all of it is so weird to me. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Storygirl Posted July 16, 2019 Share Posted July 16, 2019 (edited) I admit it -- I watch it. There have been seasons where the contestants have been committed to chastity, and others where there have been more sexual exploits. I am a Christian and don't approve of sleeping around, so I dislike that part of the show, but it is generally only an aspect of one particular episode each season. In some years, the physical act becomes a more prominent part of the show, including last year, where the male lead was a virgin, and that's all they talked about. The situation with Luke has been interesting to watch, as a Christian. I do believe his faith seems genuine, but he is immature -- and perhaps not particularly smart -- and has made a lot of mistakes in his interactions with the others on the show. There have been Christians on the show before, and virgins (or people who are abstinent), but in this case the Christian also happens to be the person who was least liked in the house. The producers played that up, obviously. I don't think this show is scripted overall, though I'm sure they feed some lines to people or make suggestions about how they might interact with others. There are some people, I am sure, who are just acting throughout and are more interested in fame than relationships. But there have been some marriages that have resulted, so I think some of the feelings and relationships are real. They definitely do edit the shows to portray people in a certain light. In this case, Luke is portrayed as the villain from the beginning, and the scenes that showed the reasons that Hannah liked him were cut from the show (this was written about by the host, Chris Harrison, in his blog). If you cut out the positive interactions and play up the negative ones, the audience is primed to view the person in one particular way. Edited July 16, 2019 by Storygirl 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Storygirl Posted July 16, 2019 Share Posted July 16, 2019 I think there was a real disconnect in this season between Hannah and Luke, because they bonded over their spiritual beliefs and discussions of the Bible (this is what was cut from the show). Therefore, he assumed that their spiritual and moral beliefs were similar, and he was wrong. I don't think he was wrong to think that a woman who says she is a Christian would forgo physical relationships with multiple guys. And he is not wrong to want someone he marries to be in agreement with him on basic tenants of male-female relationships. His approach to the conversation was blunt and awkward, but I really think he thought that she was on the same page about sex and was taken by surprise. Although I did not agree with her views about sex, she had some great points to make with him about pride and the forgiveness of God. Really, I think that neither of them was all right or all wrong about the way that God wants us to live out relationships. I think he seems more devoted to figuring out God's path, and she is more reliant on feeling that God loves her, even though she is imperfect. They were not really on the same wavelength spiritually, and it took some time for Hannah to figure that out and decide that he was not a good match for her. Seeing how much the other guys despised Luke made me sad, not only for him, but for the portrayal of a Christian being despicable. I imagine (not knowing anything about his motivation) that part of the reason he wanted to go on the show was to show that a Christian can succeed at relationships while maintaining their faith and integrity, and he failed there. As a Christian, I am always pleased to see someone living out their faith with integrity. I think that both of them showed some of their failings for the world to see, and I'm not sure why anyone would want to do that. There was a lot of talk about faith on the show, but mostly the people involved didn't live up to what they proclaimed to believe, in the way that I would hope to see a Christian do. 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Storygirl Posted July 16, 2019 Share Posted July 16, 2019 (edited) This is just my impression, which could be way off the mark. But Luke seems to fit the "dumb jock" stereotype. I know that does not sound complimentary, but I think it gets across what he seemed like to me. So I think it's likely that in the past, he has bonded with guys over athleticism and sports. And he sought physical, not emotional, connections with women (by his own admission). He, perhaps, does not have a lot of experience with interpersonal relationships that are on a deeper level, and that made him stumble in his interactions on the show. I think it's possible to be both socially kind of inept or inexperienced and also a committed believer who makes mistakes. That's why I don't disbelieve his statements of faith, even when his actions show him in a poor light. Edited July 16, 2019 by Storygirl 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ktgrok Posted July 17, 2019 Share Posted July 17, 2019 My issue isn't even the crazy sexual nature of it, but that anyone thinks this is a good way to make a match. I mean, you put that many guys in a room with one girl, and I'm supposed to believe every guy there thinks they will want that girl? that makes NO sense. 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katy Posted July 17, 2019 Share Posted July 17, 2019 (edited) 17 hours ago, Scarlett said: To be fair, I've never watched an episode of either. All I know I know from the news, printed and tv. But am I the only one shocked about how how she/he gets over night' time with several of them? And why is everyone hating on this poor Luke who wanted to know if she was having sex with them before he decided if he wanted to go home or not? I just feel like I am in the twilight zone some days. I've watched this show for a while. I don't think most of the women are getting physical with any or all of them, but the "fantasy suite" is the only time they have to be completely off camera, so generally all of them take it. Usually with a huge disclaimer that they don't want to have sex but do want to talk off camera. I don't think Hannah slept with any of them except for the person she got engaged to, but that's not because of the editing of the show. That's because she told Luke she'd only slept with two people in her life, and I think on Reality Steve (as spoilers website) it was revealed that Luke's date night was the last one. I don't think the show is scripted, but I do think producers manipulate both the contestants and the editing to maximize drama. Luke claims to be Christian but is using Christianity as a way to demonstrate his superiority to everyone else. He's hyper controlling, possibly narcissistic, manipulative, and apparently a pathological liar. I don't think Hannah was objecting to a conversation about sex, I think she was objecting to the same aspects of Luke that led every man in the show came to hate him (even the other Christians) by the end of it. She could finally see all the ways he was a hypocrite, and he has never been self-aware or humble enough to admit he ever does anything wrong. I think the show has realized from years past that Christian drama brings limited viewers and is boring from the general public's perspective. So instead they've tried to edit this and hype up the whole season to make it seem like Luke was slut shaming her. Arguably he was, but in the concept of comparing the aired conversation to what's been hyped in promos all season not so much. He had every right to ask if she was sleeping with all of them before he proposed. The way he asked revealed who he really was though, and she no longer liked him. Typically when there are 30+ women competing for one man this show doesn't lead to marriage unless the bachelor is Christian and doesn't want to sleep around and does want marriage. And typically when there are 30+ men competing for one woman it does lead to marriage. I think there are some basic sociological reasons why this happens, but usually the women are more interested in marriage than the men are. And no, most people do not go into this show thinking they're going to fall in love. They go into it thinking they'll have a good time, get to travel, get exposure for their businesses, maybe get a reality show or TV hosting job, or at the very least get enough fame and instagram followers to become social media influencers instead of having to work. I don't think Hannah is going to find love on this show though. Spoiler ahead, skip if you don't want to know. The reported winner admitted to her that he'd come on this show to promote his career and that he'd had a girlfriend back home and hadn't expected to fall in love with her but he did. She accepted that for the few months between when she chose the winner and the show airing. Then both this girlfriend from home AND the woman he was cheating on the girlfriend with came forward with cell phone text messages and mailed greeting cards that proved he was a cheater. So last week she dumped the winner and was cryptic but clear about that on social media. I'm no longer sure if Hannah was doing this show to find love or if she just wanted to find fame. Did she choose someone who didn't love her because they had some secret deal, or was she really in love for a couple of months until she figured out what an awful person he is? ETA: She did admit to sleeping with the winner. Nope, apparently not the winner. Edited July 17, 2019 by Katy 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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