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lynn

Ideas for an engagement gift

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I've never heard of doing this. But, money comes to mind. I did a quick google search and found out I was wrong! 

 

Although you may have seen these already, here are some links with ideas: 

 

https://www.theknot.com/content/engagement-gift-ideas

 

http://www.marthastewartweddings.com/600640/engagement-wedding-gifts-under-50

 

I have, through this same search, discovered that it's wrong to congratulate a bride. She should be given "best wishes" while the groom is congratulated. Huh. http://www.newportweddingglam.com/etiquette-101/etiquette-101-best-wishes-or-congratulations/

 

 

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I would actually ask the couple what they would prefer.

 

I appreciate pretty frames and other things, but when I was newly engaged and then newly married, my husband and I were in a tight spot financially. I would have much rather had a check or a Visa gift card. It would have helped us pay rent and get gas.

 

Your son's situation can certainly be different. For all I know he lives comfortably on the income he has, but I would still ask if I wanted to give the couple something. Maybe they would like to go a fancy restaurant, see a show, go on a trip, etc.

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Unless they have solid house plans and a registry, I'd go with something like a gift card for a date night.  Maybe theater tix or a nice restaurant.

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The only engagement gifts I know of are an engagement ring that the future groom gives to the future bride, and the lump sum the parents of the bride give to the bride for the wedding.  Other than those I would have to ask the couple because I haven't heard of engagement gifts and people are so different in their lifestyles and personal tastes.
 

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Depending on what you want to spend, I would give my DS and his fiancé a picture frame and an engagement photo session paid for. But then I'm one for pictures and memories and so are my kids.

 

my best friends parents gave us a very nice picture frame for our engagement that I treasured and put engagement pictures in and then later our wedding picture. It was a nice keepsake.

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dd was formally engaged on christmas eve.   that's when he gave her the ring. I knew that was coming - and I'm a big christmas ornament person, so I bought them an "engagement ring" christmas ornament that was dated.  along with regular christmas gifts. and because I had done needlepoint stockings for my kids - I got one for him and had it up when I put all the stockings up.  it was so sweet - when he saw it, he ran over and gave me a big hug.  (he calls me mom.)  

the next year, I gave them a wedding cake ('cause they LOVED their wedding cake!) "first christmas" ornament, and last year a "new house". . .. along with all their regular christmas gifts.  no baby ornament . . . .. . .maybe next year . . . .

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I would take them out for a special dinner. My SIL wanted to give us an engagement party, which was lovely. My aunt wanted to buy me something when we went to visit, and I picked out a picture frame which is much more "me" than an engagement frame would be. It has a fun wedding picture in it.

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For my birthday, 2 weeks after we got engaged, my husband paid for us to have professional photos done.   When each of my daughters announced their engagements we took them and my husband's side of the family out for dinner.  (My side is huge and there would be no way we could afford that.  Besides, my side gets together for potlucks all the time, so it's not like we don't see them much like the in-laws.)

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I have, through this same search, discovered that it's wrong to congratulate a bride. She should be given "best wishes" while the groom is congratulated. Huh. http://www.newportweddingglam.com/etiquette-101/etiquette-101-best-wishes-or-congratulations/

 

No, some people who write a blogs, books and articles about etiquette have decided to classify it as wrong, but they're ridiculous and shouldn't be encouraged.   It's perfectly appropriate to congratulate the bride and or groom just like it's perfectly appropriate to to give "best wishes" to the bride and or groom.

 

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I've never heard of doing this. But, money comes to mind. I did a quick google search and found out I was wrong! 

 

Although you may have seen these already, here are some links with ideas: 

 

https://www.theknot.com/content/engagement-gift-ideas

 

http://www.marthastewartweddings.com/600640/engagement-wedding-gifts-under-50

 

I have, through this same search, discovered that it's wrong to congratulate a bride. She should be given "best wishes" while the groom is congratulated. Huh. http://www.newportweddingglam.com/etiquette-101/etiquette-101-best-wishes-or-congratulations/

 

back in the days when brides were often treated like a commodity.  it would be "best wishes"  that it she'll be treated well . . . .

 

eta: now days - modern brides are just as  likely to make more than their husbands.  my dd does . . .

Edited by gardenmom5

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IME, engagements mean lots of congratulatory dinners out and months of planning (sometimes stressful). 

 

I don't have a go-to gift, but for my siblings and cousins I usually give coordinating accessories for dinners out (tie/hanky or cufflinks for him and scarf/shoes or dress, depending on our relationship) for her. For couple friends I usually take them out to eat. For close girl friends I'll add a gift card or open invite for some pampering when the planning gets rough. 

 

I like the idea of paying for a photo session. I'm filing that away for my kids' future engagements :) maybe adding in the suggestion of Waterford also. A nice frame to put their engagement session photo into!

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