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Practical help for someone going through divorce


4everHis
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Stay at home mom is going through divorce. Started new job in last month, moved to another home with her kids so a lot going on. Closest family is 3.5 hours away. What are some practical things to do for her? Any ideas will be greatly appreciated. 

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Help with the kids is huge. Even if her ex didn't do much at least he could be a warm body so she could run to the store or do other things. I would offer some time every week to watch the kids to help her put her life back in order. Also, just bringing over some tea and cheese and crackers (or wine!) and hanging out will probably help her feel settled into her new place.

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Oh, make plans to spend time with her when the kids are at her ex's house. It can feel VERY quiet and lonely those early days, when the kids are with the ex and you are grieving. Going to dinner, a movie, the park, whatever with another adult can ease that transition. 

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Echoing what the others said....if you can afford monetary help, hiring a housekeeper once in a while would be great.  Or dropping off some healthy delicious take out.

 

I can tell you if she has been a SAHM and is now working the adjustment curve is huge.  if you can't afford to buy things just make enough dinner to have extra to take to her.  Let her know like a day before, 'hey, I am bringing you dinner tomorrow evening, so don't make plans to cook!'  That would be a HUGE help.

 

I have a friend who is single with a 9 year old and a 6 month old.  And she is disabled.  I've not done too much to help her (I forget!) but I have offered to take her 9 year old to school to keep her from having to get out with the baby. She seemed to really appreciate that.

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Offer to be the person that she calls for weird requests. Like it's nine at night and she's got a headache and she's out of Advil.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

This is a great one. And just be the friend who she can hang out with that isn't making the perpetual sad face, who she can drink wine with, and talk about anything BUT the divorce with. Unless she wants to talk about the divorce of course...... :) Then listen and nod. 

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food, prepared food she can heat up quickly. That was our biggest issue during the divorce. We couldn't afford to eat out and I was exhausted. We perfected the art of the frozen pizza. 

 

small things that are a pain to get, like running to the post office for stamps when you need like 3 a month. 

 

Echoing the yard care, ds and I took turns

 

 

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Freezer meals

Take home cooked meal all ready to go

babysit

listen to her

help with housework if her new schedule is  challenging

help with the kids other than babysitting....their world just turned upside down too.

 

Does she need help with lawn, car maintenance, financial planning?  If her husband took care of those things, she might need help sorting it out.  Even if he didn't, she has a lot on her plate and might need help with taxes, financial planning, insurance, etc.  Her brain is probably on overload with being a single parent.

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