Weekends for homeschoolers.

[Mamasteff]

I love my kids. I really do.

 

I NEED weekends to have some "time off." It drives me a little crazy to spend my weekend doing what I do all week - staying home with the kids.

 

(dh is gone this weekend - he hardly ever travels - and I am REALLY struggling with the weekend!)

 

What do you do on weekends?

 

Yesterday we went to Chuck E Cheese (GREAT idea from older dd - at least we were not making a mess in my house). I am trying not to take advantage of my parents, who live in the same town. We tried to watch a dvd but had issues with the player.

 

Today?? I don't know. Counting hours. Not wanting to be home. Alone. Like I was last week and will be this next week.

 

Does this drive anyone else bananas?

[Tracey in TX]

I hear ya! Weekends are typically sports packed with no downtime for me to recover from a heavy school week. The last two weekends were a godsend, as soccer games were cancelled due to weather. I ran errands each day. Today was a simple thirty minute coffee break with one child. One on one time I seldom get with five kiddos. Maybe you could get a sitter for an hour to take a break. Sometimes a Starbucks run or walk around the block is time well spent.

DH travels often and I'm flying solo the children. It becomes overwhelming at times. That's when I take a bubble bath, get a coffee, or do mandatory DEAR (Drop Everything And Read) time in order to keep peace in our home.

[Aggie]

It sounds like you need some time with other grown-ups! What about asking your dad to watch the kids and you and your mom go do something together? I wouldn't consider that 'taking advantage' of your parents, but involving them in your lives. The time your dc get to spend with their grandparents is precious. Could you take them with you and everybody go somewhere neat?

 

If that isn't feasible, I would load dc up and go to a museum, a park, or visit a nursing home. Next time dh is away, you could plan ahead and do a project like a puzzle, or making Christmas ornaments or presents.

 

My dh works every other weekend, so we have school on those days. When the dc were smaller, it seemed harder for dh to be away. It's hard to imagine how single parents pull this off, isn't it? It's tough.

 

I hope your weekend gets better. :)

 

Aggie

[Mekanamom]

LOL... I understand.

 

I'm heading for major burnout over the weekend/no downtime issue. I school all week long and really need the weekends to catch up on housework, running errands, grocery shopping. Rush rush rush just to get things in order to... school all week long again.

 

Then there is running the kids to 4-H projects (on the weekends as well as the weekday afternoons).

 

And a bunch of parents pressuring me to take some time out to have their kids over to my house for playdates. (Which is not a problem, but it's a constant juggle of priorities to get a good balance of school, playdates, and home & ranch chores going, kwim?)

 

We do not live in a neighborhood with other kids- every single playdate must be planned for in advance and involves driving to drop off and pick up, which takes extra time... or waiting around for the kids dropped off here to be picked up (never on time) before I can get going on my other obligations.

 

I'm not really ranting, just trying to figure out how on earth to get everything done and get some downtime! Maybe I should quit being so flexible and just post my available hours for certain things and just let everyone else try to work around my schedule. LOL.

 

I'd love to hear about other people's weekends too!! How do you all find the time to recharge?

[runningirl71]

I totally understand too! I feel like the weekends go by way too fast! I usually tell my kids that they HAVE to be outside for part of the weekend. I have my two older take the younger outside for short periods of time. We have a swing in our backyard that they can swing her on. When they take the 3 y/o outside, it is usually just in the back yard.

 

Also, we live in a neighborhood that is very family friendly. We have four other houses around us with kids our kids ages. Could you plan a play date ahead of time if you live in a neighborhood? If you are really needing some time to yourself, could you explain that to your neighbors? One of our neighbors is another home school family and I've called her up on occasion. I've also offered to take her kids when she needs "time."

 

I also do "quiet time" here too. Even with my 13 y.o! The kids have to "retire" to their room and do something quietly for an hour. I've always done this, since they were babies. My 3 y.o. sits on her bed reading books/playing.

 

My main "problem" is getting enough time to myself as I tend to get the life sucked out of me when I'm around others all the time (I'm introverted) and so waking up early, when I have the house to myself, is good for me. That is when I exercise and have my alone time. This could be done at night, too.

 

I hope you find the balance you are looking for!:)

 

ETA: After reading your post again, I thought that maybe setting up some playdates might be helpful? Call up a friend and say you would like to spend some time talking while the kids play?

[Karenciavo]

We usually do something as a family on Saturdays (after an hour or so of group cleaning of the house :D.) Sunday is church and a lot of quiet time. My kids have always been independent and quiet so it's pretty easy for me to recharge even if they are home and my dh is not. Believe me, I am very thankful for this.

 

Do you have any parks nearby with jungle gyms for the kids and shade and picnic tables for you? Some afternoons we finish school at a great park, ds6 gets to run around and the rest of us (me, ds15, & ds13) get our school work done (along with a little play thrown in.)

[CalicoKat]

I love my kids. I really do.

 

I NEED weekends to have some "time off." It drives me a little crazy to spend my weekend doing what I do all week - staying home with the kids.

 

(dh is gone this weekend - he hardly ever travels - and I am REALLY struggling with the weekend!)

 

What do you do on weekends?

 

Yesterday we went to Chuck E Cheese (GREAT idea from older dd - at least we were not making a mess in my house). I am trying not to take advantage of my parents, who live in the same town. We tried to watch a dvd but had issues with the player.

 

Today?? I don't know. Counting hours. Not wanting to be home. Alone. Like I was last week and will be this next week.

 

Does this drive anyone else bananas?

:iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree:

 

dh likes the weekend to relax, we're tired of being home doing the same things.

 

no solutions. here's some things we've tried:

 

sometimes having an independant craft/hobby just for Sat. helps. sometimes baking special stuff.

family movie/game night.

saving library trips for Sat. only (our fav.)

[Happy]

We have dear friends who are not homeschoolers. They do so much together on Saturdays...shopping, entertainment activities, movies. I caught myself feeling bad once because we weren't doing all that. Then I smacked myself sideways and remembered, we do that alllllllllll week long.

 

I've always liked to shift gears on Saturday especially. My guys could sleep in, so my mornings were my own. Even better once they were old enough to pour their own cereal and milk, I didn't have to be on deck for breakfast. I could be in the garden or my craft area doing my thing. When they got old enough, I or dh and I could sneak away to romantic places like Home Depot alone for a couple of hours.

 

I believe heartily in daddy time. My husband travels (pilot) so he and the boys did need bonding time when he was home. Dads can take kiddoes to the zoo or museum or park on a Saturday leaving mom home to enjoy the quiet.

 

Grab the time when you can. Don't feel guilty for enjoying it.

[linders]

DH has been gone for almost 5 months now working across the country. Here was my weekend...

 

Friday night - moved and counted a gazillion boxes of popcorn for Scout sale; remembered at 5:30 on a payday Friday that I needed change for said sale at 8 am Saturday morning. Spent 25 minutes in line at bank.

 

Saturday - spent hours outside grocery store supervising 8-year-olds selling popcorn. Came home and started planning classes I need to teach at co-op next week. Took two DS to see play in evening.

 

Sunday - skipped church service but took DSs to Sunday School. Came home to count popcorn money. Spent afternoon planning Scout den meetings (I'm the leader). Helped DSs collect overripe veggies from garden. Taking DS8 to swim team practice tonight.

 

No relatives in town. Don't want to abuse the kindness of friends who already cover things like dr. appts. Can't wait to move and be reunited with DH!

[Desert Rat]

I guess I'm counting my lucky stars right now! My dh doesn't travel too much and understands that I really need a break on the weekends because our weekdays are so packed with sports and activities. Saturdays we still have soccer games and Friday nights my dh plays in his league. I try to catch some down time on Sundays sometimes. Right now dh and the younglings are at the park fishing. He's only gone for an hour or so but it's just the ticket sometimes!

[Amy in Orlando]

We have dear friends who are not homeschoolers. They do so much together on Saturdays...shopping, entertainment activities, movies. I caught myself feeling bad once because we weren't doing all that. Then I smacked myself sideways and remembered, we do that alllllllllll week long.

 

I've always liked to shift gears on Saturday especially. My guys could sleep in, so my mornings were my own. Even better once they were old enough to pour their own cereal and milk, I didn't have to be on deck for breakfast. I could be in the garden or my craft area doing my thing. When they got old enough, I or dh and I could sneak away to romantic places like Home Depot alone for a couple of hours.

 

I believe heartily in daddy time. My husband travels (pilot) so he and the boys did need bonding time when he was home. Dads can take kiddoes to the zoo or museum or park on a Saturday leaving mom home to enjoy the quiet.

 

Grab the time when you can. Don't feel guilty for enjoying it.

:iagree::iagree: Happy said it so well. Until last January, dh worked restaurant hours and was almost always unavailable on weekends. It was easy to allow myself to feel like I had to entertain the kids the way their non-homeschooled friends were being entertained each weekend. Finally, it hit me - I don't have to do that. We do plenty during the week.

 

I do encourage them to plan for the weekends now that they're older. We try to make sure they have what they need for projects at home, coordinate carpools, etc. by Thursday. I also let the kids know what my own plans are for the weekend and when I'm available to drive or whatever. But, for several years now, they've understood that "my time" is just as important (mostly, lol, it never quite works that way) as theirs. Now that they're teens they're pretty aware of asking me what my plans are before committing to their own plans.

 

While your kids are young, like others above, I encourage you to institute "quiet time." It's such a lifesaver. We still do it here - now more for my sanity than anything else. Use it to your advantage on the weekends to get a break. (Just make sure dh is on board when he IS home on the weekends!)

 

Good luck - I know how tired and frustrated and tired you're feeling right now. It DOES get easier.

[Mamasteff]

Thanks for all the ideas and support. I realized after I posted that there are SO MANY families that have it like this far more often and for longer stretches of time - married to pilots, or military, or doctors, or other jobs that take much time away.

 

I know I am incredibly blessed to have a dh who teaches, so he gets home every afternoon while it is still light (except during his coaching season), and is available every weekend. (Except this one!)

 

I am thankful to have him home as much as he is. I am an extrovert, so I need the weekends to be out, social and recharging.

 

Today we drove to Ikea and spent a couple hours on the beach with my sister and her family. Always makes me more thankful for my own lovely daughters - the younger of whom stripped herself nekkid and ran screaming with joy in the sand and surf. That's EXACTLY what we needed!!!!

[Peela]

Well, you have a 2year old. Of course you need a break. It's gets easier. I do my own thing on Saturdays- I work a few hours, and I go to band practice for myself. the kids fend for themselves, but they are 12 and 14, and dh is usually around somewhere. I get lots of free time and I have my own interests which take me away from the family, and it keeps me happy.

I remember when the kids were little though, I would just book something one night a week for myself- like a cooking course. I would go to playgroups to chat with other mums. And I would hand the kids to Dh when I needed a break. Nowadays though, I have no problem leaving my kids alone at home while I go and do something, so where dh is is not a concern.

[Rosie_0801]

Mmm. with Miss Toddler running around, I get a bit grumpy when I have to spend most of the weekend covering her so Dh can have some down time. It's not that he doesn't deserve any, just that I do too. At least if he's looking after her, it's a change from his usual job. For me it's like working 6 1/2 days per week and being on call for the other half day. Hopefully his career change will help, especially because it will be Master Baby as well as Miss Toddler next year.

Rosie

[melissel]

We have dear friends who are not homeschoolers. They do so much together on Saturdays...shopping, entertainment activities, movies. I caught myself feeling bad once because we weren't doing all that. Then I smacked myself sideways and remembered, we do that alllllllllll week long.

 

Oh my gosh. Thank you for saying that. You just made me feel completely better about something that's been giving me an inferiority complex. How did I not see that?

 

Mamasteff, do you have an enclosed park around? An indoor playground? A McDonald's/Burger King with a play area? I've recently discovered the beauty in taking the kids and a book to the park and letting them go crazy while I keep one eye on them and just sit quietly, sipping ice water and half reading my book or listening to an audiobook. I had to explain to them first that we were going to the park for them to play, not me, and that it counted as quiet time for me. They were happy to oblige because they love the park :D You might catch a few minutes that way.