Gifted and behind! Oi! (partly vent)

[scrapbookbuzz]

I wasn't even really sure where to put this because my son is gifted in certain areas but also lagging in areas! 

He's 9, almost 10, so I know part of it is the age.

 

anyway, he continually says he doesn't like math but I just don't understand WHY because he grasps the concepts so quickly.

Once he finally realizes I'm not going to let him out of it, he GETS it and we move on, albeit slowly! He groans and complains and 

has tantrums - and it really has nothing to do with his comprehension of the concepts. He groaned and complained so much this year

AND I had some major health issues in early 2014 that math and English for both of my kids took a back seat. Now we are working on 

review and catching up over the summer, although it may be Jan 2015 before they're both where they need to be in those areas!

 

Just wanted to know if anyone else has "BTDT" (been there, done that). I just talked quietly and patiently through the lesson today. 

Didn't lose my patience and we got it done. But for cryin' out loud! Must this happen every single session??

[OneStepAtATime]

Can you break up the lessons into shorter ones?  Set a timer so he knows he isn't strapped to them forever?  There may be working memory issues or something else along those lines that actually makes doing the problems more draining than you realize.  If the sessions were shorter, but you did two a day instead of one, it might help.  Also, have you tried incorporating a lot of math games and practical application math?  Have you looked at Soror's Relaxed Math thread?  Tons of awesome resources in there to help keep math interesting and fun while solidifying concepts, etc.

 

http://forums.welltrainedmind.com/topic/499692-looking-to-do-some-relaxed-math-here-want-to-share-ideas/

 

If I think of anything else I will post.  So sorry this so frustrating for both of you.

 

Best wishes...

[regentrude]

What are you using for math? Can it be that he is frustrated with the curriculum? It is not uncommon for gifted kids to balk at materials that are unsuitable for their learning style, usually because they are incremental, have too much repetition, require too much busy work. I am wondering whether this may be a contributing factor, since you write that he gets the concepts easily, and whether he would do better with more challenging materials. He may simply be bored.

[kbutton]

My 2e kiddo is quick to grasp most math concepts as well, but he's very insecure and gets anxious. It's like he makes a mental leap, and when he can't figure out the steps to how he got there, he panics. We backed off quite a bit last year and then started over fresh this fall. We are using Singapore, and when we added in the Intensive Practice books (on grade level), he's been doing much better. They challenge him just a bit, but they do it by showing him the same concepts more broadly and more deeply from a different angle. Last year, we were new to both homeschooling and Singapore, and we were compacting to get him to a challenging level (if he could do that hardest problems, we moved on, and if he needed to slow down, we did that too). I think it stressed him out to change topics so frequently even though he was grasping nearly everything on the first try. Now that he does the IP routinely, he grouses about how easy the textbook seems. It's not all smooth sailing (and he's exasperatingly slow at calculating), but he's much happier, and we accomplished a lot more math this year.

 

He also has some working memory challenges, particularly when he's stressed. His WM is not terrible, but it's a mismatch for his other strengths. Scribing for him sometimes helps us get moving. He also likes being able to write directly into the IP books--I think having everything he needs right on the same page for word problems and the like is helpful with working memory.

[snowbeltmom]

What are you using for math? Can it be that he is frustrated with the curriculum? It is not uncommon for gifted kids to balk at materials that are unsuitable for their learning style, usually because they are incremental, have too much repetition, require too much busy work. I am wondering whether this may be a contributing factor, since you write that he gets the concepts easily, and whether he would do better with more challenging materials. He may simply be bored.

 

:iagree:

I was going to ask the exact same question.  The first math program I selected was a colossal failure for the exact reasons Regentrude mentions. OP, I would consider switching math programs.  Good luck. 

 

[zarabellesmom]

Maybe it's just getting back into the routine? My daughter is always difficult after any kind of break. We have the 2e thing going on here too. She's a little sensitive on the best days, and an emotional roller coaster when she's not sure what the plan is. As for math, my daughter hated Singapore. It was too slow. She wasn't challenged and she hated the tedium. We started beast academy and saw a big improvement in attitude. Your son is a little older than my daughter and I'm not sure when you say he is behind, how far behind he is, but maybe if you let him accelerate through math (move on as soon as he shows mastery) he'll feel more challenged and get to where you think he should be. Win-win.

[eternalsummer]

another vote for the math program

 

we started homeschooling with Saxon (I didn't know there were other options, really), and every day was tears.  Finally switched to Life of Fred then BA; less resistance, more doing of math.

[scrapbookbuzz]

We've done some Life of Fred but that's really too easy for him. He did say he'd rather do it orally than writing, so SOME of it we do that way. In fact, the second worksheet we did today,

I just had him dictate the answers to me. He was fine until he got to the story problems (two of them) and he started to get wigged out. I didn't say anything about his attitude just proceeded as

if everything was hunky-dory and it went rather smoothly. We are currently using Saxon review sheets and BJU 4th Grade math. I will look into other curricula but I really think it's more boy-oriented than

curriculum-oriented.

[Upward Journey]

Been there, doing that!  My 9yo is exactly the same way.  The 12yo was exactly the same way at that age.  The 23yo was too  ;)  I think it's a boy/age thing because my girls did not act like that, at least not everyday...

 

I 'd agree about looking into a higher level or maybe a different math program.  For sure I get more tears when math is boring as opposed to when it's a challenge. 

 

[Upward Journey]

Have you thought about giving him the end of the year exam just to see?

[Guest]

It sounds like you are using way more materials for a kid that gets math than you may need. My advice is to pick just ONE program and do that. Drop the rest.

BJU on its own is enough and very good. If you feel he needs more concept practice, get the reviews book. 

 

LOF I would not say is enough on its own but a great supllement for fun reading.

 

Saxon is for sure enough but way too slow for a mathy kidlet unless you are accelerating through it by giving him the tests until he can't pass them anymore then starting the lessons at that point.

 

Just pick one.

[Jean in Newcastle]

BTDT.  Still doing that.  A lot of it has to do with my kids being 2e.  We just plug along.  Even on bad days we try to get math done at the very least.  

[TKDmom]

:grouphug:

 

Yep I've got those kids here, too. My oldest cries if it's too easy, cries if it's too hard, cries if she has to actually write down anything more than the answer... I finally decided to pull out my AoPS pre-algebra book a few moths ago and see how it went (it was supposed to be a 2-week trial while we took a break from something else). I was afraid to give it to her, because I knew it would be too hard for her. And it is. She still cries over math, but she won't let me switch her back to our old program! She told me she's actually learning math, and it doesn't seem pointless (for the first time in 5 years). Both of us came to the conclusion that she will probably cry over her math program, no matter what it is, so it might as well be a challenge and stretch her mind in new ways.

 

My 10yo boy is similar. He likes math more than his sister, but he's also smart and has the same aversion to anything that requires mental effort, especially if he has to use a pencil while thinking. I'm using Beast Academy with him to keep him challenged. I try to keep the lessons short, and push him just past the frustration point. He needs to work through that frustration, but I can't push him so much that his brain shuts down.

[Woodland Mist Academy]

 She still cries over math, but she won't let me switch her back to our old program! She told me she's actually learning math, and it doesn't seem pointless (for the first time in 5 years).

 

This sounds so familiar! On a positive note, there haven't been tears or many complaints for as long as I can remember, so it did get better--much better. Hang in there!

[Mrs. Tharp]

He might not see the point of doing the work if he already understands it. I try to tell my kids that if they just demonstrate to me that they know it, instead of balking, we can move through the material much faster.

[Farrar]

I don't know about BJU, but Saxon is a program that I think would be a pita for a kid who grasps concepts quickly simply because it uses so much drill.

 

You said that Life of Fred was too easy for him...  but what's wrong with something being easy?  Fred goes all the way up through high school math, so there's no way he's covered everything Fred has to offer.  If it fits his learning style, why not let him do it in a way that fits him?