Murmer Posted February 12, 2013 Share Posted February 12, 2013 This is really long but I wanted to make sure I was accurate about it. Backstory: March 2012 Signed dd up for class...10 other kids signed up. I have experience in said class type and offered to help. Teacher let me help. June 2012 Teacher split class based on age and asked me to help with both. This caused me to have 1 child who was not in class while I was teaching. 1st class dd played on iPad. 2nd class ds played on iPad and then was taken home by dh. Signed dd up for another class with teacher 30 mins away (continuing 1st class too). Teacher asked me to sub for her other teacher 4 times and gave me a gift certificate for my help. Aug 2012 Teacher tells me my children are free for classes I am helping in. Sept 2012 Continue helping with 1st class also get asked to help with class 30 minutes away full time because she likes my teaching. Oct 2012 Teacher announces she will be closing the current place after Dec. and moving to another place 30 mins away. She wants me to help because she respects my skill in said area. Classes are offered when DH is working so I informed her that if she wanted me to help both of my kids would have to come and that one would be in the "closet" (hallway with a curtain blocking it from the room) and that would be the only way I could help. She agreed. Jan 2013 Sign dd up for another class offered at the location before the one I was helping at because it was a 30 min drive each way and I wanted to ensure we made the most of the time. Paid 70 in gift certificates 60 in cash. Week 1 Day 1 Class A DD does fine (I don't help in this class) Class B DD is rolling on the floor not participating. DS is in closet on idevice. Day 2 Class A DD in closet on iDevice, DS in class does fine. Class B Both kids are awful!!! Consequences occur at home. I realize class is during dinnertime and also close to bed time. Decide to make sure that I bring food to help. Week 2 Day 1 Class A DD does fine (DS pees out of his pants 3 times in 2 hours ends up in DD pants) Class B DD participates for a bit then stops I ignore her since she is not in the way of other students. Teacher discusses a time out place after class that she could use if she does not listen. Day 2 Class A Went fine. Class B Fed kids. DD did fine until last 15 mins...took her to time out were she melted down. She was punished with time in with mom and dad the next day and loss of other privileges. Realized she would probably benefit from getting her pm ADHD med between classes. Week 3 Day 1 Cancelled due to weather Day 2 Class A Went fine. Class B Fed kids and tried ADHD meds. DD did well and completed the class. Week 4 Day 1 Class A fine Class B Told teacher dd had just been diagnosed with High Functioning Autism. She asked if she could tell others because they just thought DD was naughty, (and then she moved conversation on to the lesson plan). DD did AWESOME in class doing everything exactly as told and following all directions. Day 2 Class A DS peed in pants on the first part. Sent him downstairs (the only place they have a bathroom) to get changed. He doesn't return so during stretching (when I am not needed) I go downstairs discover he hadn't changed. Changed him and we went upstairs. Class went well. DD in closet 1/2 through has to go potty. Quickly walks through class and goes then waits at the door peeking in until I tell her to come back. Goes back to "closet". Class B Cancelled Get email that someone in Week 4 Day 2 Class A complained and that I am not to bring my kids to class anymore but they will not pay me to help although teacher respects my abilities as a teacher of said activity. So I said I would no longer help because I will not pay someone to watch my kids so I can help someone else for free. I was very polite and said thanks for letting help. Monday I email asking for a refund of the 60 I paid for Day 1 Class A since we will not be returning. Because they don't want me to bring my kids if I come to teach and Class A was only added since we were going to be there anyway. They are refusing to refund my money. Should I pursue the refund of my money more or just move on? Thanks for reading my novel. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Murphy101 Posted February 12, 2013 Share Posted February 12, 2013 No. Just be glad to be done. Ugh. What a mess. You basically ended up paying them $60 so you could volunteer for them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted February 12, 2013 Share Posted February 12, 2013 I don't know how you managed to get your kids to sit behind a curtain for so long! especially at their ages. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heatherwith4 Posted February 12, 2013 Share Posted February 12, 2013 I agree with Martha, 100% Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest submarines Posted February 12, 2013 Share Posted February 12, 2013 Move on and be thankful you are done with this torture. Is it yoga or something similar? Can't you do this at home with your children in a much more relaxed setting? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melissad2 Posted February 13, 2013 Share Posted February 13, 2013 Whew....I'm stressed out just reading that. I would just let it go and be done with it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bolt. Posted February 13, 2013 Share Posted February 13, 2013 I did my best to read well, and I get that this situation got way beyond reasonable expectations for anyone. It's good to be done with it. I have a couple of things that I think might help if you could clarify: 1. It seems like your DD does well and enjoys her day 1 class -- what is the concrete reason to take her out of it (rather than let her continue and just be an average parent-of-participant until the end of the session)? 2. Is it that one person, a participant (or parent of participant) complained to you by email -- and that crystallized your desire to get out of an over-expectation situation... Or is it that the organizer got the 'concerned' email and decided to make extra requests of you (and you said no to the extra requests). 3. How are you feeling about all these facts? Angry? Ashamed? Relieved? Put-out? Rejected? Do you feel that the situation got out of hand in spite of good intentions, or that you were being intentionally pressed and taken advantage of? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charcat13 Posted February 13, 2013 Share Posted February 13, 2013 No advice but am astonished your kiddos did that well. Mine couldn't. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unicorn. Posted February 13, 2013 Share Posted February 13, 2013 So you signed dd up for class A, and they asked that your dd not return to class A? Then yes, I would insist that they refund the money, as they are the ones who asked you not to return. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QueenCat Posted February 13, 2013 Share Posted February 13, 2013 They should refund the portion of the tuition that covers the classes that have not occurred yet. I'm really not understanding the expectation of a young child hanging out in a closet/small area, and not be allowed to interact with what was going on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lmrich Posted February 13, 2013 Share Posted February 13, 2013 Yikes! What harm comes from you asking again? And again? Ask three times and ask the teacher to speak up for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Murmer Posted February 13, 2013 Author Share Posted February 13, 2013 1. It seems like your DD does well and enjoys her day 1 class -- what is the concrete reason to take her out of it (rather than let her continue and just be an average parent-of-participant until the end of the session)? It is a 45 min class and a 30 min drive each way...which makes the drive longer than the class. Also this late in the "session" the only other activities available to sign up for now are on Day 1, which is closer to us. 2. Is it that one person, a participant (or parent of participant) complained to you by email -- and that crystallized your desire to get out of an over-expectation situation... Or is it that the organizer got the 'concerned' email and decided to make extra requests of you (and you said no to the extra requests). A parent complained I guess and the owners told the teacher that I was not allowed to bring my children to class because they are a distraction. I am not getting paid and am doing this because my kids enjoyed it and I wanted to help. 3. How are you feeling about all these facts? Angry? Ashamed? Relieved? Put-out? Rejected? Do you feel that the situation got out of hand in spite of good intentions, or that you were being intentionally pressed and taken advantage of? I am not sure how I feel, I am a little frustrated because I think that I was not given a chance to work on fixing or improving the situation. I know it may have ended the same way but it seems like someone (or many people) were having problems with things but never told me so all the sudden out of the blue its an ultimatum done. I wish that if there were earlier issues I would have been respected enough to have them communicated to me so I could either fix it or realize it was not going to work. Otherwise they are taking 1 complaint from 1 day and throwing a major fit which makes me feel like they hate me for some reason. Move on and be thankful you are done with this torture. Is it yoga or something similar? Can't you do this at home with your children in a much more relaxed setting? Its gymnastics and yes we may do it at home. There is also a gym just down the street that I may try. I don't know how you managed to get your kids to sit behind a curtain for so long! especially at their ages. That's what iPad and iPods were invented for lol. They only get to use them when we are there. So you signed dd up for class A, and they asked that your dd not return to class A? Then yes, I would insist that they refund the money, as they are the ones who asked you not to return. My dd was signed up for Day 1 A (paid) B (free I helped) and Day 2 B (free I helped). They told me I was not to bring my children if I was going to help. I told them I would no longer be able to help there. They did not directly kick her out of class A but they did say they didn't want me to bring her with me if I came. They should refund the portion of the tuition that covers the classes that have not occurred yet. I'm really not understanding the expectation of a young child hanging out in a closet/small area, and not be allowed to interact with what was going on. The child in the "closet" was the child not involved in the class going on. Day 1 Class B was for bigger kids (5+) and Day 2 Class A was for littler kids (3-4) so in order for me to help I had 1 child in the "closet" were I knew where they were while the other was in the class I was helping. I did not want to leave a child unaccompanied downstairs where I could not see them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Murmer Posted February 13, 2013 Author Share Posted February 13, 2013 Yikes! What harm comes from you asking again? And again? Ask three times and ask the teacher to speak up for you. Teacher already refused to refund, based on the "policy"...she is the one I asked :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QuirkyKapers Posted February 13, 2013 Share Posted February 13, 2013 Can you still come with the kids but just not help anymore? It sounds like they would rather have you help than have your kids in their program. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AK_Mom4 Posted February 13, 2013 Share Posted February 13, 2013 Well, since it was the teacher that said you couldn't have a refund, I would certainly call up the owner and speak to that person directly about the refund. The worst she can say is no. Best case you might get your $60 back. With or without the refund, I would walk away. There are other things to do and this arrangement was tough for your kids, even though it sounds like they were doing really well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mungo Posted February 13, 2013 Share Posted February 13, 2013 I would definitely ask for a refund since your kids were told not to return (especially since the complaint was in regard to the class that you paid for), but that was the agreed-upon-beforehand arrangement. I might not *expect* to see that money again, but I would definitely ask the owner. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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