Struggling with Praying for the Sick

[Hunter's Moon]

I've really been struggling lately with prayer.

 

On Facebook, I follow a few pages made for children who are very ill. Two have cancer, and the rest have half a heart. Some are on a heart transplant list, others are enduring open heart surgery, one recently had a stroke, one is on ECMO because his own heart isn't even pumping anymore :crying: One of the kiddos recently passed away at 18 months old.

 

I struggle so much when praying for them. I pray for peace for their families, and I pray that the doctors and their care teams be guided to make the best decisions. But I struggle with praying for their healing. I don't believe that disease of any kind is the will of God. Humans are fragile. We get sick. That is that. So I struggle praying that the will of God be done for them because I don't believe their illness is God's will.

 

So many people were praying for healing for the little man who passed, and he still passed.

 

So, in these situations, how do you pray? I feel so lost. I cannot imagine what their families are going through.

[PrincessMommy]

The illness may not have been brought by God, but He can use it for our sanctification.

 

In these, and any other tough situation I pray that God will help me to accept His timing and His will.

 

Did you see the discussion over on the Orthodox Inquirer's group on the subject of suffering and illness? One book I suggested there, which I think is one of the best on the subject of Theodicy is "The Doors of the Sea: Where Was God in the Tsunami?" by Hart.

[Kari C in SC]

I don't pray like I used to before my son was killed in an accident. I still say I will pray for you and I do mean it, but it is not the way most people pray. Basically, my prayer is just like talking to a best friend about whatever the topic may be. I am talking to God about that child in the hospital. I am talking to God about my niece traveling hours to her home. I used to pray for healing for that child or safe travels for my niece. Now, I just discuss with God that these people are going through this life and let them and their families accept whatever HIS will is and be the best people they can be. It is a HARD way to pray because most of us have been taught to pray for outcomes or things. I just pray for strength and acceptance of whatever it is this life has for me. I can't pray for safety or healing because when I read those things - I think did I not pray enough for my son. In times of intense grief that is an awful way to think. When I am stronger, I realize that is a ludicrous scenario. God can change things, but more often than not - I believe bad things just happen. He will be there for them or their families, but sometimes bad things just happen. I also believe that He knows what day you will be born and what day you will die and no amount of prayer is going to change that. There is some plan - we just don't get it on this side.

[MooCow]

I don't pray like I used to before my son was killed in an accident. I still say I will pray for you and I do mean it, but it is not the way most people pray. Basically, my prayer is just like talking to a best friend about whatever the topic may be. I am talking to God about that child in the hospital. I am talking to God about my niece traveling hours to her home. I used to pray for healing for that child or safe travels for my niece. Now, I just discuss with God that these people are going through this life and let them and their families accept whatever HIS will is and be the best people they can be. It is a HARD way to pray because most of us have been taught to pray for outcomes or things. I just pray for strength and acceptance of whatever it is this life has for me. I can't pray for safety or healing because when I read those things - I think did I not pray enough for my son. In times of intense grief that is an awful way to think. When I am stronger, I realize that is a ludicrous scenario. God can change things, but more often than not - I believe bad things just happen. He will be there for them or their families, but sometimes bad things just happen. I also believe that He knows what day you will be born and what day you will die and no amount of prayer is going to change that. There is some plan - we just don't get it on this side.

 

:iagree:and huge :grouphug: to Kari C in SC

[texasmama]

I don't pray like I used to before my son was killed in an accident. I still say I will pray for you and I do mean it, but it is not the way most people pray. Basically, my prayer is just like talking to a best friend about whatever the topic may be. I am talking to God about that child in the hospital. I am talking to God about my niece traveling hours to her home. I used to pray for healing for that child or safe travels for my niece. Now, I just discuss with God that these people are going through this life and let them and their families accept whatever HIS will is and be the best people they can be. It is a HARD way to pray because most of us have been taught to pray for outcomes or things. I just pray for strength and acceptance of whatever it is this life has for me. I can't pray for safety or healing because when I read those things - I think did I not pray enough for my son. In times of intense grief that is an awful way to think. When I am stronger, I realize that is a ludicrous scenario. God can change things, but more often than not - I believe bad things just happen. He will be there for them or their families, but sometimes bad things just happen. I also believe that He knows what day you will be born and what day you will die and no amount of prayer is going to change that. There is some plan - we just don't get it on this side.

 

:iagree::grouphug:

 

Many times I will just say a short and silent "God help so and so." I think that covers it all.

[Mommyof4ks]

As the mother of a young cancer survivor I get it. I struggled to pray for about year after my son's diagnosis, because quite frankly I did not want God's will to be done unless my selfish desires to have my son here were part of His plan. I grew a lot out of that experience, and I think the very fact that you are questioning this right now shows just how significant the lives of these little people are in this world.

 

Just because people are not healed on earth does not mean they were not significant. I learned some profound lessons from little ones going through terrible things prior to their death. Of course as parents living in 2012 we want and expect all of our children to live longer than we do, but it was not that long ago that most families lost a few children and expected that to be the case. My son would have died within days of his diagnosis if he would have been born in the 1950s, because there was no viable treatment options then, and that was in my parent's lifetime.

 

Basically I pray that God's will be done in the lives of the sick, and I pray for peace for the family no matter what the outcome unless I am close to the family and know what they need specific prayers for. We met several families during our time at the hospital that were praying that God would take their child if it was His will, because the child was suffering so much and even if they were patched up the pain and agony would continue. I do not know why God chose to completely heal some of them and not others, but every life has an impact on this world, and if we pay attention we can learn a lesson they have to teach us.

[Juniper]

This is where I am very thankful I do not have to come up with my own prayers in total.

 

I have family going through a trying situation and often throughout the day I will pray, "Lord Jesus Christ, son of God, have mercy on ******"

 

By the time I say the EO prayers for the sick, struggling, or various other trials...I am in a better frame of mind to add my own thoughts at the end.

 

I hope that helps! When a fellow horse friend's daughter was recently severely injured in a truck accident I google searched some prayers for healing that

 

were just beautiful. I will see if I can find them.

 

Edited:

 

I liked these http://www.stlukeorthodox.com/html/supplication/sickness.cfm

 

and this site has a bunch of links http://www.stjrussianorthodox.com/prayers.htm

Edited October 27, 2012 by Juniper

[SandhillsRanchMama]

Suffering- what a huge question. I just listened to a podcast on the reason for suffering. It is by William Lane Craig on the Reasonable Faith website... the podcast is from the recent "On Guard" conference. Good stuff. I wonder about how much sadness we are exposed to now. I have to carefully monitor what I read. I am not opposed to taking on grief of others that I know... but reading about kids on the FB and such is really just borrowing grief that I was never meant to bear. I think we are supposed to pray for those we know and in our circle of influnce... that was why we are put where we are! Not that we can't pray for others... of course we can and should. But I just wonder about all the news and sadness that we are exposed to. It can't be healthy. You parents above who have lost kids... wow. What amazing attitudes you have.

[Ellie]

You still pray for their healing, and be comforted that whatever happens was in God's plan. He doesn't tell us everything. :)

 

There is sin in the world. Because of that, there will always be death, until the final resurrection. It wasn't God's original plan, but it is what it is now. Because of Jesus, we know that disease and death are not the final victory, but there will still always be disease and death until the end.

 

We pray because our prayers might be efficatious in someone's healing; we pray because our prayers build our relationship with God; we pray because we encourage others when we do.

[*Michelle*]

I don't pray like I used to before my son was killed in an accident. I still say I will pray for you and I do mean it, but it is not the way most people pray. Basically, my prayer is just like talking to a best friend about whatever the topic may be. I am talking to God about that child in the hospital. I am talking to God about my niece traveling hours to her home. I used to pray for healing for that child or safe travels for my niece. Now, I just discuss with God that these people are going through this life and let them and their families accept whatever HIS will is and be the best people they can be. It is a HARD way to pray because most of us have been taught to pray for outcomes or things. I just pray for strength and acceptance of whatever it is this life has for me. I can't pray for safety or healing because when I read those things - I think did I not pray enough for my son. In times of intense grief that is an awful way to think. When I am stronger, I realize that is a ludicrous scenario. God can change things, but more often than not - I believe bad things just happen. He will be there for them or their families, but sometimes bad things just happen. I also believe that He knows what day you will be born and what day you will die and no amount of prayer is going to change that. There is some plan - we just don't get it on this side.

 

:grouphug:

 

My prayers also changed when we lost our son. Now, it's always, always along the lines of help me (or x or y) to accept Your will or help me find peace during this trial, or even just offering up the pain or grief in sacrifice.

[lluv]

You still pray for their healing, and be comforted that whatever happens was in God's plan. He doesn't tell us everything. :)

 

There is sin in the world. Because of that, there will always be death, until the final resurrection. It wasn't God's original plan, but it is what it is now. Because of Jesus, we know that disease and death are not the final victory, but there will still always be disease and death until the end.

 

We pray because our prayers might be efficatious in someone's healing; we pray because our prayers build our relationship with God; we pray because we encourage others when we do.

:iagree:

 

This book helped my understanding of prayer and changed the way I pray. I've recommended it to everyone I know since I've read it.

 

The Kindle version is under $7.

 

http://www.amazon.com/Live-Praying-Life-Power-Provision/dp/159669291X/ref=tmm_pap_title_0?ie=UTF8&qid=1351369512&sr=1-1

[Mommy22alyns]

I've been struggling too, so :bigear:.

[milovany]

"Lord have mercy on [name]" is a wonderful, short prayer that, instead of trying to tell God what to do (presuming to know what's best in a situation), says "Lord, please give [name] whatever s/he needs to be in closer communion with you" (letting Him decide what that is).

 

:grouphug: to you ~

Edited October 27, 2012 by milovaný

[TranquilMind]

BeatleMania:

 

I struggle so much when praying for them. I pray for peace for their families, and I pray that the doctors and their care teams be guided to make the best decisions. But I struggle with praying for their healing. I don't believe that disease of any kind is the will of God.

 

 

I agree with this. Sickness and disease are not God's will, any more than murder and rape are God's will.

 

 

Humans are fragile. We get sick. That is that. So I struggle praying that the will of God be done for them because I don't believe their illness is God's will.

 

 

Absolutely.

 

So many people were praying for healing for the little man who passed, and he still passed.

 

So, in these situations, how do you pray? I feel so lost. I cannot imagine what their families are going through

 

 

One thing I never do is pray "that God's will be done" in cases of sickness, because He already told us what his will is.

 

John 10:10

The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance (to the full, till it overflows).

 

Psalm 107:20

He sends forth His word and heals them and rescues them from the pit and destruction.

 

Psalm 103:1

Bless the Lord, oh my soul, and all that is within me, bless his Holy Name. Bless the Lord, oh my soul, and forget not all his benefits; who forgives all your iniquities, who heals all your diseases.

 

Matthew 8:16-17

When evening came, they brought to Him many who were under the power of demons, and He drove out the spirits with a word and restored to health all who were sick. And thus He fulfilled what was spoken by the prophet Isaiah, He Himself took [in order to carry away] our weaknesses and infirmities and bore away our diseases.

 

Do they always all get well? No, but like David, even though he had been told by the prophet Nathan that his son would die, because of his sin against Uriah, he still fasted and prayed until it was over. I guess I think that like David, we should never give up until it is clear that it is all over for now.

 

And sometimes they do get well.

 

I've lost a lot of people, but stubbornly, I keep praying for the next one to get healed. I've also seen a few healed.

[Kathryn]

"Lord have mercy on [name]" is a wonderful, short prayer that, instead of trying to tell God what to do (presuming to know what's best in a situation), says "Lord, please give [name] whatever s/he needs to be in closer communion with you" (letting Him decide what that is).

 

:grouphug: to you ~

 

:iagree::grouphug:

[Paula in MS]

I have thought about this a lot from every conceivable angle because I lost my 1st husband when he was in his mid-30s. When you are in this kind of position, you hear a lot of advice about how to pray.

 

What I have come to realize is that you have to try to shift your mind set about death. I don't believe God's thoughts about death are the same as ours. Life is full of suffering and trials along with the joy. When someone is healed, they will continue to have to endure the struggles of this life along with the happiness. When they die, we assume that God is not merciful. But, what if, by allowing their death, he chooses to FOREVER end their suffering. They will have no more trials through their life but only joy with Him. Maybe by allowing death, God is choosing to bring them the ultimate joy and happiness.

 

I know this is a lot of rambling, but I think God views things totally differently. So, when someone I care about dies, I choose to believe that God was merciful in allowing that. No more sadness and all of that. It helps me deal. God can see that person's future, whoever they are and is always working for their good.

 

I would just continue to pray for God's will with the understanding that He knows what He is doing. If these are people you are close to, also pray about how you can help meet their needs during this crisis.

 

:grouphug: Just try to shift your focus from this life to eternity, and you will begin to feel hope again. This is not our home.

[Kari C in SC]

I have thought about this a lot from every conceivable angle because I lost my 1st husband when he was in his mid-30s. When you are in this kind of position, you hear a lot of advice about how to pray.

 

What I have come to realize is that you have to try to shift your mind set about death. I don't believe God's thoughts about death are the same as ours. Life is full of suffering and trials along with the joy. When someone is healed, they will continue to have to endure the struggles of this life along with the happiness. When they die, we assume that God is not merciful. But, what if, by allowing their death, he chooses to FOREVER end their suffering. They will have no more trials through their life but only joy with Him. Maybe by allowing death, God is choosing to bring them the ultimate joy and happiness.

 

I know this is a lot of rambling, but I think God views things totally differently. So, when someone I care about dies, I choose to believe that God was merciful in allowing that. No more sadness and all of that. It helps me deal. God can see that person's future, whoever they are and is always working for their good.

 

I would just continue to pray for God's will with the understanding that He knows what He is doing. If these are people you are close to, also pray about how you can help meet their needs during this crisis.

 

:grouphug: Just try to shift your focus from this life to eternity, and you will begin to feel hope again. This is not our home.

 

My husband and I think this way too. Our son spent a tour in Iraq. It was hard - no doubt, but not as hard as the tour he was supposed to go on to Afghanistan. Our boy had what I called a good and soft heart. I was SHOCKED that he joined the military. He took things very deeply into himself and hurt his soul with them. So, my husband and I wonder if God didn't end his life to make his eternal life begin before he had to endure the horror of more war. I won't know till I get there, but it helps me to hang on in the present.