Chris in VA Posted June 13, 2008 Share Posted June 13, 2008 I'm sitting here feeling sorry for myself. I need some practical, keep-going, you-can-do-this, it's-going-to-be-ok cheering up. Dd is going to school next year. I'm worried about the peer influences most of all. Will it turn my sweet, innocent (still watches Big Comfy Couch on occasion, if that tells you anything) girl into a mouthy, belly-baring brat? Or wannabee? I have to work, it's not an option, and she's going, period. But I'm sad and a little scared for her and for me. Edited for privacy Kick me in the @ss while ya hug me. Get me motivated to keep on keeping-on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelli in TN Posted June 13, 2008 Share Posted June 13, 2008 Ds is using drugs again--I know because I snooped and read letters from his girlfriend. Tell me we won't have to live this nightmare for long. Those who know the history, thanks for letting me indulge in some self-pity. Those who don't, skip this part.. I don't know how you get through this, over and over again. I have admired your strength for so long. When I went through all the nonsense I went through with my daughter, you were frequently a role model to me. You can be going through all this and still come on here and be an encourager, joke around, build people up..... I have prayed for you just now and I will continue to do so. I wish we could just meet for coffee someday! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soph the vet Posted June 13, 2008 Share Posted June 13, 2008 :grouphug: Hugs to you, Chris. I don't have adolescents yet but I was one who was into all sorts of things. No advice about your ds, just love him and pray that he gets caught before getting really deep into that. About your dd, just because she is going to school and you are going to work doesn't me you are no longer educating her, KWIM. You can always supplement areas you feel the school is lacking in. As for peer pressure just keep talking with her about your values, keep pouring into her. It will not be easy but it will be worth every effort you make. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shell in SC Posted June 13, 2008 Share Posted June 13, 2008 (((CHRIS))) we're here for you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mama Lynx Posted June 13, 2008 Share Posted June 13, 2008 Awww, Chris :grouphug: As for your daughter - well, and your son, too - just keep talking to them, and finding ways to connect with them around your job. Your dd has had such a great head start in the important years! PS does not automatically mean she'll change. Have you talked to her about peer pressure, and the silly/crazy/stupid things people sometimes feel like doing to fit in? I'd talk a lot about that, and present that kind of behavior as a choice, with consequences for either choice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laura in VA Posted June 13, 2008 Share Posted June 13, 2008 Oh, sweetie. I'm sorry you're going through this (again). You have such a gentle spirit and are so fun to be with. I have to run some errands this morning, but I would love to have you over this afternoon if you and Nature Girl would like to come hang out! Just let me know! I'll supply the Starbucks! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brigitte Posted June 13, 2008 Share Posted June 13, 2008 Chris, no kicks in the back-side for you only :grouphug:. I am sorry you are going through all this (again). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JudoMom Posted June 13, 2008 Share Posted June 13, 2008 Oh, Chris :grouphug:. I'm so very sorry. May God grant you peace and wisdom. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KidsHappen Posted June 13, 2008 Share Posted June 13, 2008 I'm sitting here feeling sorry for myself. I need some practical, keep-going, you-can-do-this, it's-going-to-be-ok cheering up. Dd is going to school next year. I'm worried about the peer influences most of all. Will it turn my sweet, innocent (still watches Big Comfy Couch on occasion, if that tells you anything) girl into a mouthy, belly-baring brat? Or wannabee? I have to work, it's not an option, and she's going, period. But I'm sad and a little scared for her and for me. Ds is using drugs again--I know because I snooped and read letters from his girlfriend. Tell me we won't have to live this nightmare for long. Those who know the history, thanks for letting me indulge in some self-pity. Those who don't, skip this part. There's more, but those are the two hardest things right now. I'm tired. I'm weepy from time to time, but I don't think I'm depressed. Kick me in the @ss while ya hug me. Get me motivated to keep on keeping-on. Chris, you know that I know what you are going through. I wish I could tell you that he is clean, that he has turned the corner and that you won't have to go through all of that all over again. But alas, I can not. We are still living the nightmare. I haven't heard from my ds in over a year and I have absolutely no idea where he is or if he is even alive much less straight. I am so sorry that you are going through this and I understand your pain and grieve with you. But you have to keep going on. You have other children to think of and take care of and I am sure that they need extra love, guidance and care as all of my children do because there was no way to shield them from all of the trauma that they have been through as their brother traveled down this road. You also have a dh to love and care for. I am sure that you are the rock of the family. In times like these I come here for support and reassurance and then dig deep down inside to find the resources to carry on. I am sure you can do the same. I like to think that we are so much stronger for what we have been through. The final and most important thing is: you have to take care of yourself. You can not carry the weight of the world on weary shoulders. Find time to rejuvinate. I couls say more but I have to run to the airport to pick up hubby. Know that I think of you on a regular basis and I am sure many other do as well. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandy in TN Posted June 13, 2008 Share Posted June 13, 2008 I'm sitting here feeling sorry for myself. I need some practical, keep-going, you-can-do-this, it's-going-to-be-ok cheering up. Dd is going to school next year. I'm worried about the peer influences most of all. Will it turn my sweet, innocent (still watches Big Comfy Couch on occasion, if that tells you anything) girl into a mouthy, belly-baring brat? Or wannabee? I have to work, it's not an option, and she's going, period. But I'm sad and a little scared for her and for me. Ds is using drugs again--I know because I snooped and read letters from his girlfriend. Tell me we won't have to live this nightmare for long. Those who know the history, thanks for letting me indulge in some self-pity. Those who don't, skip this part. There's more, but those are the two hardest things right now. I'm tired. I'm weepy from time to time, but I don't think I'm depressed. Kick me in the @ss while ya hug me. Get me motivated to keep on keeping-on. I don't know if this is applicable, because I just started reading the General Forum threads and have no clue about the background. However, you said that you wanted a kick in the @ss. In hs/ college my brother ran around with a brilliant, but wild group of boys. There were 4 of them (my brother and 3 others) that were really tight. Of these two of them are dead. One of them (certified genius) hung himself in prison. The other (very bright and artistically gifted) literally drank himself to death. He left the third his identical twin brother (also very bright and artistically gifted) dealing with the aftermath. How do you get over that? My brother (again bright and artistically gifted) now works in advertising as an art director. That is a 50% death rate; 25% dismayed and confused; 25% successful adult working and using what he went to college for. Did I mention that my brother and the twins all went to art college- the twins went for film. I don't know how, but based on these odds, I encourage you to intervene- immediately. Also, his behavior will impact your other children. This impact would concern me more than ps. Just writing about the senseless loss of these two young men who had so much potential makes me cry. I'm so sorry. Mandy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted June 13, 2008 Share Posted June 13, 2008 :grouphug: I just read through some of your blog. I loved the picture of the rainbow. May you be given many rainbows. They just don't happen without going through the rain. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted June 13, 2008 Author Share Posted June 13, 2008 Thanks everyone. I'm keeping on.:) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pam "SFSOM" in TN Posted June 13, 2008 Share Posted June 13, 2008 Thanks everyone. I'm keeping on.:) Be strong, Chris. You're not alone on this journey. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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