8filltheheart Posted May 15, 2008 Share Posted May 15, 2008 Today we had a tween/teen thing at B&N's Starbucks. I had 6 of my kids with me and another mom had her younger kids there, too. There was this guy that everytime the girls got up (teens or little ones), he got up and started walking around. Repeatedly. Continuously. Always watching the girls or walking over to the kids section. It bothered me from the beginning.....but I am always cautious and have on my "mommy radar." I didn't say anything but I was watching the kids very carefully. After a while, one of the other moms, one with only a teenage son, stated that there was a guy giving her the willies. So it wasn't just me. Well, we were there over 2 hrs. The second we started to pack up our stuff, he grabbed his stuff and went out to the parking lot. I am totally creeped out. I can't let go of this feeling of my kids being stalked. I REALLY wish our house had a security system installed right now b/c it would be turned on!! You know.....leaving a parking lot in a 15 passenger van is definitely not a way to leave inconspicuously. :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
proudmamma Posted May 15, 2008 Share Posted May 15, 2008 Oh my, I would be creeped out too. There are so many "weird" people...it is very unsettling to have children and worry about what could happen to them. So sorry for your experience but so glad that you were aware!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unicorn. Posted May 15, 2008 Share Posted May 15, 2008 That's pretty creepy. I think I would have talked to a manager and had him detained while we departed. Ick! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plaid Dad Posted May 15, 2008 Share Posted May 15, 2008 If he shows up again, I would definitely alert the management. Are there any SAHDs in your group who could give him the big-dog stare? If not, how about very obviously taking his picture with a cell-phone camera? Should be enough to give him the message. He may have been harmless, but I wouldn't bet on it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindyg Posted May 15, 2008 Share Posted May 15, 2008 Were you at a mall? If I were sufficiently creeped out, I would probably have asked an employee to call mall secuirty and then asked the security guy to walk me and the kids to the car (van). I don't know if strip centers have security guys on call during the day, but that would have been the time to ask. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clwcain Posted May 15, 2008 Share Posted May 15, 2008 Trust your gut. If he shows up again, complain to the store, but realize that unless he does something, there is little they can do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jenny in Atl Posted May 15, 2008 Share Posted May 15, 2008 OK, I'm not saying this lightly. As one who worked in bookstores for about ten years, I can honestly say, you will find few other places, except libraries, where so many odd, even mentally unstable, people like to congregate. I have no earthly idea why, maybe the smell of books, the mass of information in one place, or it could be higher IQ folks tend to become mentally ill more often? I don't know... :confused: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michelle in MO Posted May 15, 2008 Share Posted May 15, 2008 would go back to that B&N and alert the management. That is really creepy, and too "coincidental" that he packed up and left as soon as you and your group left. Maybe I'm being an alarmist, but a friend of mine experienced the following incident at a Wal-Mart where she lives. The cashier made some references to wanting to "shoot" some people, and she told me that there was something in his manner that made her believe it could have been for real. She alerted the management. Maybe it's overkill, but it doesn't hurt to follow your gut-level instinct. Best wishes to you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jkwynn Posted May 15, 2008 Share Posted May 15, 2008 That sounds like a guy who was in a south AL bookstore while we were visiting the in-laws one time. This guy didn't leave when we did, though, he 'fell asleep' (I dont think he was really asleep) in a chair - wearing running shorts - with his leg propped up, very inappropriately. :ack2: It was right beside the kid area... I did mention it to the people who worked there, but we left before seeing what, if anything, they did or said to the guy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
8filltheheart Posted May 15, 2008 Author Share Posted May 15, 2008 Trust your gut. If he shows up again, complain to the store, but realize that unless he does something, there is little they can do. We talked about notifying the management. But one of the women who used to work in a similar environment said that unless he had actually done something (more than getting up and walking around) that they wouldn't be able to do anything. I wish I had thought to take a picture on my cell phone. I will remember that piece of advice for the future!!! I really needed the day out b/c I was stressed! Now I am more stressed than before we went. I know there are really creepy people in the world. Hey, Plaid Dad......I sure wish there had been men in the group! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klmama Posted May 15, 2008 Share Posted May 15, 2008 It's a good thing. Those who ignore it sometimes have to live with awful consequences. Be glad, glad, glad you have it!!!!! I've seen creepy people like the guy you described, and I'm thankful that I noticed! Sometimes they make my skin crawl the moment I see them, and other times it's just the weird things they do. The last one was a very friendly guy in the vet waiting room telling my 11 yo he was new in town and wondered where to get his bike fixed. Um.... an 11 year old would know this? Dc said, "I don't know," but in less than a minute I finished paying and turned around to get the kids and the man didn't ask me - the one who would know. I smiled pleasantly at him, and he looked down immediately, like he knew he had been out of line. Seems like a person who really wanted to know about bike repair shops would ask me, don't you think? Hmm... that reminds me that I meant to talk with dc about that situation. It seemed innocuous on the surface, but my mommy radar told me it was an "I'll meet this child today so I'll seem to be a friendly, safe person the next time we meet and mommy isn't there" situation. Blech. I'm not overly paranoid about my dc talking with people they don't know, but this one was just... off. Too many details, just like it talked about in that book. What was the name? The Gift of Fear, or something like that? Momof7, I'll keep you and your dc in my prayers. Did the kids notice the guy at all? Would it worry them to point out that he was acting weird and that if they ever see them again they should let you know immediately or get help from some other adult? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jan in MO Posted May 15, 2008 Share Posted May 15, 2008 You've gotten good advice here. Trust your gut on this one. You've got nothing to lose by doing so. If this were to happen to me I'd have made an effort to see his license plate and get a description of the car. I think maybe I've watched too many crime dramas but that's how my mind would have processed this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nakitty Posted May 15, 2008 Share Posted May 15, 2008 If he shows up again, I would definitely alert the management. Are there any SAHDs in your group who could give him the big-dog stare? If not, how about very obviously taking his picture with a cell-phone camera? Should be enough to give him the message. He may have been harmless, but I wouldn't bet on it. Yup! That's what I would do. Take his picture as well as a picture of his car...and not on the sly either....I would want him to KNOW that I'm aware of his presence. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcconnellboys Posted May 16, 2008 Share Posted May 16, 2008 I think I would have approached not only management, but the man, himself, if they did nothing......But I'm sort of a T. Rex...... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pam "SFSOM" in TN Posted May 16, 2008 Share Posted May 16, 2008 I think I would have approached not only management, but the man, himself, if they did nothing......But I'm sort of a T. Rex...... Me too. I screamed and yelled and made a fuss in a Polish pottery factory in Poland when a guy exposed himself to me. At me. Bleh! Ack! :eek: :ack2: He left running. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Dominion Heather Posted May 16, 2008 Share Posted May 16, 2008 OK, I'm not saying this lightly. As one who worked in bookstores for about ten years, I can honestly say, you will find few other places, except libraries, where so many odd, even mentally unstable, people like to congregate. This is so true. Almost every creepy weird experience I have ever had has been at a bookstore or at the library where I used to work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcconnellboys Posted May 16, 2008 Share Posted May 16, 2008 Good grief! How bizarre! Is that like the French version of pinching? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindyg Posted May 16, 2008 Share Posted May 16, 2008 We talked about notifying the management. But one of the women who used to work in a similar environment said that unless he had actually done something (more than getting up and walking around) that they wouldn't be able to do anything. I don't agree with this advice. No, they wouldn't be able to throw him in prison or even ask him to leave the store. But a large male-type from management could stand near you, watch as you walked to your cars, take notes, and just be *present*. You don't have to be accousted before asking management to join you in being protective and alert. (And I love the idea of using the cell phone to take pictures.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pam "SFSOM" in TN Posted May 16, 2008 Share Posted May 16, 2008 Good grief! How bizarre! Is that like the French version of pinching? No, he was clearly a pervert. But I didn't know enough Polish to alert anybody on the staff to what had happened. *shudder* And it's not something you try to use sign language about, KWIM? *shudder again* He was long gone before I could find someone to translate, and even then, I couldn't have identified him unless he... er... *shudder*. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcconnellboys Posted May 16, 2008 Share Posted May 16, 2008 Geesh, when I think about all the factory tours we've done in past, I feel lucky that we haven't been shown more than we bargained for, LOL (hope the rest of the trip went better for you - did ya buy some pottery to remember the trip?)..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pam "SFSOM" in TN Posted May 16, 2008 Share Posted May 16, 2008 Geesh, when I think about all the factory tours we've done in past, I feel lucky that we haven't been shown more than we bargained for, LOL (hope the rest of the trip went better for you - did ya buy some pottery to remember the trip?)..... Yep! Great stuff. Utilitarian and lovely. :-) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcconnellboys Posted May 16, 2008 Share Posted May 16, 2008 LOL! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie4b Posted May 16, 2008 Share Posted May 16, 2008 What you described worries me for the time that there are kids there without mommy radar around. I think I would both alert the management and call local law enforcement. The point wouldn't be to *do* something about noncriminal but weird behavior today, but rather to get his description on record in case something happens in the future--KWIM? It's also possible that rather than a pedophile, he is mentally ill and was going through some compulsive ritual behavior (Like everytime a kid wearing red moves, you have to move the same way.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
astrid Posted May 16, 2008 Share Posted May 16, 2008 Are there any SAHDs in your group who could give him the big-dog stare? I LOVE that phrase! And this very creepy situation seems a very appropriate application for the "BIG DOG STARE.:blink:" Astrid (who has BIG DOGS, but they love everyone!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joanne Posted May 16, 2008 Share Posted May 16, 2008 Like in the other thread relating to mommy radar, please read Protecting the Gift by Gavin de Becker. It will give you concrete, understandable reasons about *why* your radar goes off, how to keep your kid safe and how to get over the culturally conditioned idea that you have to "be nice". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.